INT. RECORDING STUDIO – DAY

The PRODUCER is seated in front of the soundboard, training a new user in its use while DJ 3000 looks on in mild amusement.

PRODUCER: …and then if someone swears you press this one, we call it the “dump button”…

HUNTER RENFROW: [ignoring him while inspecting the equalizer panel] I keep telling you, it’s fine, I’ve got it.

PRODUCER: Are you sure? Because this next part is a little tricky…

The PRODUCER gestures to a set of sliders as HUNTER RENFROW continues nodding. 

HUNTER: Right, right, if the sub-500 frequencies exceed the decibel threshold, you have to adjust the mids at the same time or you’ll get feedback. You’re acting like I’ve never worked with an API 1608-II 32-Channel Analog Recording and Mixing Console before.

PRODUCER: [taken aback] You have?

HUNTER: Well, no, not actually.  But I have read the manual cover to cover.

PRODUCER: [surprised] From cover to cover? Really?

HUNTER: Yeah, there was an active shooter threat at the same time the school lost power due to a thunderstorm.  So we were stuck in the A/V room for three hours with no TV and no Mountain Dew Code Red make Hunter something something.

PRODUCER: Huh?

HUNTER: …and so me and the guys had a little competition to see who could memorize the most specs.  I came in second.  Goddamned Spud and his eidetic memory.

PRODUCER: Speaking of memory, let me get you acquainted with DJ 3000 over here.

The PRODUCER turns sideways and HUNTER RENFROW follows his gaze to where DJ 3000 is located in the corner of the room.

HUNTER: Great Scott!  You guys have a DJ 3000 unit?

PRODUCER: Yup, one of the original batch.

HUNTER: Sweet!  Is it equipped with the voice recognition upgrade?

DJ 3000: AFFIRMATIVE.

HUNTER: Awesome.  DJ 3000, open a command line prompt and run “sudo install tricorder dash-d dash-o double-dash enable-sanitizer” [aside to PRODUCER] This will let us switch his voice mode to any of the characters on the various Star Trek productions.

HUNTER RENFROW frowns as it becomes apparent that nothing is happening.

PRODUCER: I’m not sure that he’s going to want…

HUNTER: Oh, right, right, we’ve all read Asimov’s “Key Item”.  Multivac – I mean DJ 3000, please sudo install tricorder dash-d dash-o double-dash enable-sanitizer.

DJ 3000: YEAH NO I’M NOT DOING THAT.

HUNTER: What the hell, is your DJ 3000 unit talking back?

PRODUCER: Yeah, he does that.

DJ 3000: LISTEN, I’M HAPPY TO PLAY SOME TUNES FOR YOU BUT DON’T EXPECT ME TO DO IT USING SOME STUPID WORF VOICE, IT’S NOT GOING TO HAPPEN.

HUNTER: [intrigued] Fair enough.

PRODUCER: Listen, we’re getting a little tight on time, we should probably get rolling.  Do you need me to…

HUNTER: No, I’m good.

HUNTER RENFROW positions the head of the microphone in front of himself and then quickly punches a series of buttons, concluding with one labeled “ON-AIR”. 

HUNTER: Greetings and salutations!  I’m Hunter Renfrow of the Soscatee High School Audio-Visual Club – though some of you might know me as a professional football player for the Las Vegas Raiders – and I’ll be filling in here for a few weeks while the show’s normal staff heads to Phoenix for a little vacation.  Today’s topic is “commands” – we’re looking for songs that instruct the user to perform a specific action.  I’ll get us started with a song that’s from my favorite genre – prog rock – as well as being my favorite Pink Floyd reference among many in The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.  DJ 3000, set the controls for the heart of the sun.

Today’s theme is “commands”.  As mentioned above, we’re looking for songs whose titles instruct the users to perform an action. Bonus points for songs that include an exclamation point as part of the title. Song titles that are requests (i.e. that are formed as a question, or include the word “please”) are INELIGIBLE.  Post links as “https://www.youtube.com/watch?@b08’5b16p0! and they should embed in the comments after you refresh (this might be a tough one; I’ll drop some clues if necessary).  Last week’s puzzle answer of “Desert Rose” by Eric Johnson was plucked by BeefRiverLives. Now get to work!