Hey.

I’m fighting a cold, still being furloughed and waves vaguely at everything all this, so let’s just get to it, ok?

Freezer Vodka League

Week 9 Match Ups

Week 9 Standings

So, what’s shaking this week? Indelible Prickstains FC, Original Recipe White Claws, and The Drunky QB are tied atop the field at 6-3 with five teams chasing them at 5-4. At the other end of the spectrum, we have three teams with near-mortal locks on relegation: She’s got good Jeantys (2-7), Dead Hobos (3-6), and Rev’s Chosen Ones (3-6).  One relegation spot remains up for grabs and there are three teams tripping over their dicks to get it, all with 4-5 records: Stefon Diggs’ Pink Powder Club, D&D for Jocks and Pump Up The Spam.

Lowratio League

Week 9 Match Ups

Week 9 Standings

AI Abuelas and Rod Rust never sleeps continue their traditions of excellence, remaining tied for the two automatic promotion spots, and with both losing their match-ups this week. Unfortunately for Raccoon With A Meth Pipe, they also lost and did not gain any ground on the leaders.  With their victory in week 9, Jimbo’s Sad Hombres sits poised for a strike at the top spots while ensconced in a playoff billet.  The Hunters of Renfrow find themselves holding onto the fifth playoff spot, with the only 5-4 record in the league.  That leaves the last playoff spot up for grabs among five teams at 4-5.  In the Lowratio League paddock/basement we have four teams at 3-6.

Lowratio League Blowout of the Weak

**BONUS**Jaguars At/After the Bye**BONUS**

It’s been a gott-dammed roller coaster of a season for the tens of Jaguars fans around the globe and aboard all the ships at sea.

2025 Season Prediction

8-9 Second in the AFC South.  2 chances to snag a Wildcard berth; Slim and None, and Slim just left town.

The Jaguars currently hold a 5-3 record which is good enough for 2nd place in the AFC South behind the Danny Dimes led Clots.  With week 14 and week 17 matchups still to play, the division is still up for grabs.  Add in the apparent return to earth of the Clots QB and as good as those gravy-wallowing simpletons have played thus far I now see a narrow path for Jacksonville to get to the playoffs this year. That depends, though, on Prison Girlfriend improving his play.  A 9:6 TD/INT ratio, while not putrid, isn’t striking fear into opposing defenses. Speaking of defenses, the JAX D had been forcing turnovers and giving the offense additional drives, or scoring themselves.  That has dropped off over the last few weeks, but the defense has made some crucial plays to pull victory from the jaws of defeat (wins over KC, LV come to mind). The Jaguars have only been blown out once, vs RAMMIT! in week 7, so they can win the close games and with Cam. Fucking. Little as the placements man, we have a long range weapon for those late drives.

Significant Injuries: rookie WR/DB Travis Hunter (knee), WR Brian Thomas, Jr (shoulder), TE Brenton Strange (on IR)

Trades: Tank Bigsby to the Eagles, Jakobi Meyers from the Raiders

Mid-Season Prediction: 9-8. Still 2nd in the AFC South and no playoffs.

Who earns promotion from Lowratio League to Freezer Vodka League? Who will be relegated and replaced in the senior league this year? Tune in to find out!

Until Next Time!