Mundial State of Mind, Offseason Sunday Etc. Etc.

Sí sí síiiiii… The biggest tournament of the world’s most popular sport (a Quidditch Cup for normies, if you will), starts in 18 days all over North America. I’m glad to see Canada and México co-hosting with The Great Satan, to which I have to give props. For El Mundial, the U.S. Dept. of State relaxed visa requirements and bundled approval to a downloadable app. The app includes all FIFA events for each day of the tournament, records all non-English conversations, and has a countdown timer to leave the U.S.A. that updates weekly. Or daily, depending on ICE whims.

There are several changes for this World Cup. The first is 48 teams pool. Some say it brought teams of questionable quality; I say there are many cute widdle underdogs: Curaҫao, Cape Verde, Haiti, Iraq, Jordan, Scotland, the U.S.A….

The knockout stage was expanded to a nutty 32-teams field, from which at least one shocking result from a dreadful 0-0 at full time has to emerge.

Both México and Canada will host 13 games, of which three are in the elimination rounds.

HEARTFELT gif, mind. I’ll deffo keep track on the fan situation along all three hosts, especially on home team support. And there’s some new stuff for this tournament that might even improve the current version of fútbol, but bidness first.

NFL NEWS

-The headline says QB Stafford signs a one-year extension with RAMMITTT!!! for $55 million, the actual item can be read to be a $5 mil. bump for ’26 and let’s see what happens.

-Giants DL Roy Robertson-Harris will miss the ’26 season because of an Achilles injury during OTAs. Hate news like these.

-Extending: the Lions LB Jack Campbell (for 4 years); the Jints, GM Joe Schoen (until next John Harbaugh hissy fit).

-From the backlog: as far as I know, there has not been any commentary about the next Owl being held the Sunday before Presidents’ Day, a U.S. holiday. This is something that has been stumped for, since last century, from every angle—fans, employers, liquor stores, masochistic ER employees… Even so, I have yet to see a single “WOOOOOO AT LAST” anywhere on the web about it. Which, gotta say: makes me have more faith in humanity. Publishing in socials even the slightest achomlishment has been found, universally, as a clear sign of toxic narcissisim. So just enjoying the outcome, without any attention-whoring, is a sign that folks are not really that fucked up in the head–generally.

-Incidentally, the next Owl falls on Valentine’s Day. If forced to opine, I humbly declare 2/14/27

SPROTS TO MIGHT

All times Central.

STANLEY CUP PLAYOFFS

Colorado @ Las Vegas leads 2-0) – 7:00

TRAVELING 3s

Thunder @ Spurs (trail 1-2) – 7:00

GRANDES LIGAS

Vigilantes (Gore) @ Angelinos (Detmers) – 6:20

FINALLY,

There are new rules for this Mundial that tinker with the game as it always has been played. But first, some taeks.

When it comes to rule changes, the NFL is hella instructive. The N Fitbaw Lee changes the game (not the rules, the game) often, sometimes from year to year. Examples:

“More receiver abuse”

“OK less receiver abuse, please sit down Mr. Polian”

“No wedge on kickoffs”

“Sudden death is unfair. Let’s make it 1^st possession TD on overtime wins”

“Deferring kickoffs for overtime likely wins”

“This catch codicil lacks obscurity”

“Let’s revisit kickoffs after an Adderall and ‘shrooms sesh”, etc. etc.

However, the NFL sometimes implements rules during preseason and sees how it goes, or approves rules for a year (like the replays on PI stuff), allowing an experimental period. On the other hand, FIFA is more of a “Fuck prudence” Rollerball / hegemon outfit.

As far as I know, FIFA introduced VAR at the ’18 World Cup in Russia. And ever since, the flubs and technology have been integral to top-flight Lesser. (Side note on VAR: as gar as the games are concerned,  I don’t remember the Putin Cup being anything than freakin’ magnificent.) The new rules for this Mundial are aimed at cutting delay, which I like. After looking at several sites through Google, artisanally, these called my attention:

-A player has 10 seconds to abandon the field when being substituted. Otherwise, the incoming player gets to sit out for one minute and the other team gets a 10 on 11 power play. This could be a bitch to enforce.

-Throw-ins from the sideline have to be made within 5 seconds. Dithering changes possession. I like this one a lot, and foresee a lot of managers getting yellow cards for arguing.

-VAR reviews second yellas and “clear and manifest error”, like a corner that was really a throw-in, or using brown shoes with black slacks. Jesus Christ some managers still have a 70s color palette.

-Fans caught drinking not-Michelob Ultras around U.S. stadiA will be tased on-site by ICE.

-Injury pantomimes: a player that requires medical attention on the pitch has to sit out a minute. No more hasty Lazaruses yall amirite?!?

-Fans caught drinking Michelob Ultra outside of stadiA anywhere in México and Canada will be beaten and emasculated, respectively and vice versa. And it would be just. Forever and evel, amén.

Next Sunday, I’ll post the ‘26 Argentina preview. Gotta get the bile goin’.

All gifs via giphy.com.