DFO Radio: He Said She Said

INT.  RECORDING STUDIO – DAY

A pair of radio professionals are standing outside the recording booth sipping coffee, awaiting the arrival of the week’s guest host.  The [DOOR FLIES OPEN] and a young couple enters the room.

PRODUCER: [moves over to greet them] Hey, what’s happening, Grimey?

BRENT GRIMES: [with a barely detectable measure of sarcasm, rolling his eyes ever so slightly] How nice to be greeted with such a familiar salutation.

PRODUCER: [oblivious] Welcome, welcome. [shakes BRENT’S hand]

FEMALE COMPANION: [menacingly at CONNOR] The fuck you lookin’ at, fuckstick? [makes sudden threatening motion]

CONNOR: [flinches]

PRODUCER: I’m so sorry, Mr. Grimes, we can’t allow your guest inside the studio.

FEMALE COMPANION: Guest?  I ain’t no goddamned guest.  I’m his fuckin’ wife!

PRODUCER: [abashed] Oh, my goodness, I’m so sorry, Mrs. Grimes.  We’ve been a little gun-shy since Rex Grossman was here and did his whole “This week’s theme is rockets!  Now it’s queens!  Now it’s ROCKET QUEENS!” bait-and-switch bit with a woman he originally claimed was his “cousin from France”.

MIKO GRIMES: The fuck is this shit, anyways?

PRODUCER: It’s a, uh, radio show.  You’ll be receiving calls from listeners, then playing the songs they request.  According to a theme that you select.

MIKO GRIMES: [frowns angrily but says nothing]

PRODUCER: [to BRENT] So have you, uh, thought of a theme for the week?

BRENT GRIMES: As a matter of fact, I have.  I thought this week’s theme might be “Gentlemen”.  That is to say, songs that are about a particular “Mister” – Mister Postman, Mister Sandman, and so forth.

PRODUCER: [smiles] I like it!

MIKO GRIMES: But what about fe-males?  You know, like that Tannehill bitch?  The one who always insists on being called “Missus” Tannehill like she all fancy an’ shit but then runs around with a fuckin’ AK in her trunk…

BRENT GRIMES: Sweetcakes, I…

MIKO GRIMES: Yeah…let’s do that.  I got just the thing to get us started.  [moves to enter the studio – glares at CONNOR, who is standing between her and the door] GET THE FUCK OUTTA MY WAY. [she enters the studio and settles behind the desk] How the fuck’s all this shit work?

—

This week’s theme is songs that include Mr., Mrs., Miss, Ms…you get the idea.  MIKO GRIMES will get us started with a song about a friend she made while locked up in a cell New Orleans.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eAW3y5l6Dm4