Welcome back to the Beat! Last time we watched the equivalent of a mouse beating an elephant right after the saddest fight in BattleBots this season. This week we have old favorites trying to get to 1-2, and in the main event, two fan favorites trying to avoid 1-2. And we have our first edition of Bubble Watch, because I’m the guy who actually reads Bubble Watch. Well, at least the Big East section. And then sees that St. John’s is nowhere near it. And then curses it out. (Someday, right?)

Anyway, onto the fights!

HUGE vs. Kraken
HUGE: 0-2 (L, KO 2:17 vs. Mammoth; L, JD 3-0 vs. Hydra)
Kraken: 1-1 (L, JD 2-1 vs. Black Dragon; W, JD 3-0 vs. Witch Doctor)
Man, gotta feel for Kraken. Desperado winner, runner-up, and the meta-breaker. That’s some fight sched, and you’ve gotta think as long as this last fight isn’t a complete whitewash it’s promising for their chances.

As for HUGE, I’d say their chances look a hell of a lot better at 1-2 than 0-3. I can see a lot of the big time bots that go 1-2 making it, assuming they get there (HUGE, Rotator, Witch Doctor, the loser of tonight’s main event). But 0-3? Almost no way, unless they get thrown a 30+ seed because fuck it. In which case, sucks for you, Bloodsport/Uppercut/non-allowed bike rack Hydra!

Speaking of not allowed attachments, Kraken’s allowed attachment is… a harpoon attached to their upper jaw. Well, it fits the theme. The plan is to hook onto the wheels with it and drag HUGE as necessary. Again, can we have more killsaws next year? Or like, any killsaws? Because right now all control bots can do is drag to their pulverizer or the screws. Which if you’re driving backwards is hard to do. So Kraken’s kinda screwed in that aspect.

Kraken was not screwed in its opening seconds however. It was a good rush to get in before HUGE could get the bar spun up and yes, Kraken could get a bite on the center part of HUGE and use as much flame as it could in the time that it could hold.

The problem was then you have to let go. And that meant HUGE could get spun up again. And Kraken already did take a bit of a hit cosmetically from the first bite. And the upper jaw armor was already looking a bit suspect. And at full speed, very suspect. “If there was just a doctor in Southern California that could perform that kind of [plastic] surgery!” joked Chris Rose.

Unfortunately that would be Dr. HUGE, lopping off more pieces of face. But Kraken remained dogged in trying to slow HUGE, or hook onto the wheels. They paid for it with more of that jaw armor coming off, but they did get a hook to the still not functioning yet killsaws and toward the pulverizer which just narrowly missed HUGE’s middle.

Kraken continued to take punishment to that top jaw, which was still functioning enough to be able to self-right as pieces fell off it. HUGE got stuck on top of the inverted Kraken and it looked for a moment that an unstick was going to be necessary, but HUGE spun away and Kraken, now down both eyes, could get up and keep driving and keep battling and keep trying to use that harpoon to some effect. It was doing its job and Kraken was getting some bites on the side of the wheel, where the spike was, but damage was going to be hard to come by. Unless it was to Kraken, as one last shot from HUGE knocked something loose because Kraken didn’t immediately pop back up but spun in place. Something was hanging out, whether a speed controller what I have no idea but it wasn’t ideal. But Kraken was still spinning around and driving, and somehow this went to the judges. “You guys built a hell of a robot, that thing took a beating.” Jonathan Schultz is absolutely right and Kraken deserves the praise, but it was HUGE getting the win by unanimous decision and finally getting off the schneid. 1-2 looks a whole lot better than 0-3. (I had it 5-0, 2-1, 2-1 if anyone cares.)

As for Kraken, I think they’re on the bubble, but there aren’t too many robots who have lasted the full nine minutes this season. And they’re one of them. They’re durable and Matt Spurk and co. should be proud of that.

Ribbot vs. Axolotl
Ribbot: 1-1 (W, KO 0:43 vs. Tracer; L, JD 3-0 vs. MadCatter)
Axolotl: 0-1 (L, KO vs. WAR? EZ!)
Ribbot is probably in with a win and out with a loss here. The loss to MadCatter doesn’t penalize it too much since it’s a 3-0 bot, but the KO over Tracer isn’t the biggest win ever. Granted this would also not be considered the biggest win ever, but you know, stack the wins and 2-1 should get you in unless all three fights were extremely weak. Ribbot is once again going with its undercutter for this fight.

Axolotl is a vertical spinner from a team that got in late and none of them had prior combat robot experience. Y’know what? Good for them! The outer forks are bigger to try and win the ground game, so it’s not like they threw this together haphazardly, and let this season be a learning experience! Their first loss was to fellow rookie vert WAR? EZ!. Just be competitive in this one, it’s probably a step up considering Ribbot was a promising borderline bubble team last year until their loss to SawBlaze.

Axolotl looked good coming out for the first 10 feet or so, and then it looked more that they were trying to spin their wheels and having traction issues. And after the first hit from Ribbot their vertical disk was no longer spinning. After the second it looked like they had lost some drive.

Ribbot was in there and hit the tires once and then the back, and then with a yell of “SEND IT!” tried to go for a ramming hit and knocked their entire foam frog off and nearly got the rare self-OOTA. This was a good place to stop. Ribbot wins by KO in 47 seconds.

Big Dill vs. Rotator
Big Dill: 1-1 (W, JD 3-0 vs. Atom #94; L, JD 3-0 vs. Lock-Jaw)
Rotator: 0-2 (L, JD 2-1 vs. Beta; L, JD 3-0 vs. Valkyrie)
Copypaste HUGE for Rotator, though there’s the advantage of having fought for 6 minutes of getting wailed on in various ways. Against Beta it was a tour of the walls because the killsaws don’t actually exist anymore. Against Valkyrie it was three minutes of being ground down.

For Big Dill a win would be massive. A loss puts it on the bubble on account of fighting Lock-Jaw and Rotator, both solid bots. But since its win over Atom #94 would be considered fairly weak competition it would be behind Kraken, HUGE, and Rotator for those few 1-2 bot spots. So, like, the back of the bubble but probably outside looking in. There’s a bunch of 1-1 bots in the same boat though. That might ultimately become your bubble, which of those 1-2 bots get in. (On the Rotator page, we learned the Beta fight was actually the last filmed due to when Beta got there and having to go through all the health and safety things.)

Also, fun fact that nobody told us, Big Dill captain and driver Emmanuel Carillo has one arm. It’s taken three fights to bring that up because, you know, the robot doesn’t suck. So kudos there.

In the Rotator realm of modularity, it’s the undercutter blade and the rear forks to try and get either under or through Big Dill’s wedge. However, the wheel guards also got removed for this fight to prevent Big Dill’s forks from getting in there and getting a lift and control. And it meant Rotator came in at a svelt 215, rather than its usual weight, close to the 250 lb. BattleBots limit. Hell, he’s under the old “conventional” heavyweight limit of 220, used in pretty much every competition pre-reboot.

All this meant that on the box rush Victor Soto could spin around and use the forks to repel the rush and give Rotator more time to spin up, keeping Big Dill at bay and retreating, then wheeling around and attacking the side.

Big Dill finally tried to show some aggression at those rear forks but just slipped off and slipped between and Rotator could get behind and just narrowly miss Big Dill’s rear (hitting the wall instead). This might have been even better since Big Dill faced front and Rotator went weapon to weapon and bent Big Dill’s forks. Big Dill tried to lift and turn the tide but Rotator was just a bit too spry, evading and then further bending the forks.

Big Dill changed tactics, trying to feed Rotator its wedge, keeping the forks up high and hopefully out of the way of further punishment. But we’ve seen Rotator’s reliability this year, and the undercutter kept cutting. And then turning away to again show the forks to Big Dill.

Rotator kept working at the sides and the back of Big Dill, taking bit by bit off the armor. Rotator finally got a good enough angle to take out the back left tire after all the assault on the wheel guards and rear. Big Dill was technically mobile but it was clearly not going anywhere. Rotator wins by KO in 2:45. It didn’t get to join Kraken in going the full nine minutes in its fight, but I think that’s okay since the win was by KO.

Lock-Jaw vs. JackPot
Lock-Jaw: 2-0 (W, KO 2:20 vs. Captain Shrederator; W, JD 3-0 vs. Big Dill)
JackPot: 2-0 (W, KO 1:47 vs. SubZero; W, KO 0:58 vs. Ghost Raptor)
A pair of 2-0 bots looking to become the second team to 3-0 after MadCatter. And with as contrasting stories as they come. On one the wily veteran legend in Lock-Jaw. On the other, the rookie bot on a budget in JackPot. Both are almost definitely in, but a win catapults them into a higher seed, and especially JackPot, who’s getting a big step up in competition. Ghost Raptor’s one thing as a former semifinalist, but Lock-Jaw’s a perennial contender. A win here would open some eyes.

Both bots spun up, but JackPot also charged while Lock-Jaw tried to flank. And JackPot hit the jackpot because it looked like Lock-Jaw threw a belt from that ambush as its weapon slowed and the driving was just a bit bouncy. Lock-Jaw had the forks and was going to have to rely on them. It could get to the sides on JackPot, but not to the extent that they could get a flip attempt, if the forks can even do so. A second head-to-head strike looked like either as second belt came off or it just moved the first one, not sure. Regardless, Lock-Jaw’s magic smoke that had been an occasional bane in seasons past came back as Lock-Jaw tried to go head to head and tank the blows and tried to stop JackPot’s weapon. It wasn’t working as the weapon flipped it over. Not the extravagant toss of other verts, but it helps make life a little easier, and you could see what Jeff Waters had mentioned about Lock-Jaw’s weapon mount being a little loose as you could see it move from the force of the blows. And the inversion also didn’t help the pushing as JackPot lost its weapon belt, but was winning the push game too.

Another plume of smoke from the veteran bot and Lock-Jaw was cooked. JackPot flops the set—3-0, 3 KOs, this one in 2:30.

Chronos vs. Bloodsport
Chronos: 0-1 (L, KO vs. P1)
Bloodsport: 2-0 (W, KO 2:12 vs. Skorpios; W, KO 1:10 vs. End Game)
I have no idea why this fight was scheduled. I expected Bloodsport to get, like, Uppercut or Hydra or Valkyrie. Y’know, another 2-0 bot in a battle for one of the top seeds. Not Chronos, which in its BattleBots career hasn’t been the most stellar. Ring spinners are finicky, because it’s surprisingly easy to fuck up the ring, which is why Chronos is the only one in the field. It lost an untelevised fight to P1. (Unless of course this fight was Bloodsport’s first in reality, in which case big step up from Chronos to Skorpios… who knows?)

Bloodsport’s overhead spinner blade was up to speed before Chronos was, and the ring spinner just had to retreat to try and create space. It could only work for so long as Bloodsport caught up and unleashed a blow that sent Chronos hard into the wall. Chronos was still mobile but it looked like the ring spinner had shut down. A couple more hits from Bloodsport did help all but confirm. Chronos at this point was predominantly in the corner, trying to olé the Bloodsport bull and hope for recoil. Instead they were the ones recoiling into the wall though, so I can’t say the tactic was working too well. Bloodsport did glance the wall, and the weapon stopped, so maybe it worked after all? No, never mind they spun it up to show it could, and then turned it off and just pushed at Chronos. Chris Rose asked about the tactic, which bot whisperer Peter Abrahamson mentioned, and then Bloodsport confirmed. It was a tactical move, since they’re locks for the round of 32 and as long as nothing catastrophic happened in the remaining 90 seconds Bloodsport would move to 3-0, and with wins over Skorpios and End Game, they’d warrant a high seed regardless.

Once it got up to speed, sure, leave it and get some more hits on that ring spinner until it stopped, and then, sure, there were some spins here and there that did damage, but Bloodsport looked mostly content to run out the clock. It went to the judges and in a decision that surprised nobody, Bloodsport wins by unanimous decision. (I have it 5-0, 2-1 control, 1-2 aggression—coin flip since both did do some retreating.)

Fusion vs. WAR? EZ!
Fusion: 1-1 (L, KO 2:05 vs. MadCatter; W, KO 0:53 vs. Aegis)
WAR?EZ!: 1-1 (W, KO vs. Axolotl; L, KO vs. SlamMow!)
Fusion’s back in the mix after its win against Aegis, and the loss to MadCatter looks a whole lot better now than it did then. A win here and it’s very likely in. As for WAR? EZ!, its first two fights were both untelevised, the previously mentioned victory over Axolotl, and a KO loss to SlamMow! which means HOLY SHIT STOP THE PRESSES TEAM DANBY IS 2-0. And all it cost them was renaming the team thanks to that sweet sweet sponsor money! Way to bury the lede there, Chris and Kenny.

But yeah, WAR? EZ! a very boxy four-wheeled rookie vert that Reese Ewert is equating to a live fire target practice. Well, this could either go brutally as expected or hilariously wrong. Fuck it, I’ll root for the latter!

Fusion led with the vert, actually getting its wedgelets caught in floor seams. WAR? EZ! took this chance to… gently nudge Fusion. Well there’s your problem, you have no issues with clearance (because the plow doesn’t look like it’ll get stuck), charge! That was a golden opportunity, Juarez family!

Eventually the two bots made meaningful contact, actually via Fusion’s horizontal weapon. And this became a wonderful angry glorious murderball of kinematics equations known as Fusion recoiling. It didn’t slam into the wall though, so it was good to go.

WAR? EZ! was flipped over and missing a tire. And the weapon was dead. Well, that unfortunately went as expected. Fusion wins by KO in 54 seconds.

Main Event: Skorpios vs. Tombstone
Skorpios: 1-1 (L, KO 2:12 vs. Bloodsport; W, KO 1:59 vs. Perfect Phoenix)
Tombstone: 1-1 (L, KO 0:39 vs. End Game; W, KO 1:19 vs. Slap Box)
I’m similarly surprised of this fight, but Zachary Lytle mentioned that this is the fight Skorpios has been waiting four years for. Because apparently the idea this season was to give Skorpios all of the fucking horizontal spinners it hasn’t already fought. Sure, let’s just give it Spinner Killer of the Year if it wins this. At the least it would be Billings Family Killer of the Year, since Zach Lytle and crew already took down Tyler Nguyen’s Perfect Phoenix, even if the loss to Bloodsport was another horizontal.

“Billings Family Killer of the Year” sounded a lot darker than I thought it was going to.

As for the aforementioned patriarch, we’re throwing all the multiple-years old challenges at Ray Billings and Tombstone this year I see. First End Game, now Skorpios. Both bots have to be safe to have these two thrown together, but imagine Tombstone as a lower-16 seed with a loss? Or even out of the tournament altogether? Okay, there’s no way that second one’s happening, it’s probably above Rotator and HUGE in the potential “1-2 bots getting in” field, but probably equal to if not slightly behind Witch Doctor assuming it wins its final fight. Skorpios would probably be behind all Rotator, HUGE, and Witch Doctor, so it would be on that bubble of 1-2 bots, though still near the front considering it can be a top-16 caliber bot.

As for the fight, say it with me: “Skorpios box rushed and Tombstone moved to one side.” More importantly for Skorpios they needed pretty much every shot to hit the plow. And in the early going it was. And even better, it was a dance to the side, where Skorpios’s hammer-saw was dropping on the wheel. So far nothing from it, but that’s definitely where you have to go on Tombstone, as an impact from the big red bar separated the two bots.

On the next clash, same thing, using the plow to tank the hits but one shot did hit a Skorpios wheel, and there was some visible damage. Tombstone was gaining the upper hand hitting Skorpios from every angle (yet somehow managing to spin it right into the plow) and the top part of the plow came off. Which might be decorative, not sure. Regardless, this was starting to not go so well for Skorpios as there was bit hit after big hit and… hey, is Tombstone’s right wheel okay?

Whether from the one or two times the hammer saw hit it (I saw one plus one behind it and then probable contact after Tombstone hit the plow and physics did its thing), recoil, or most likely both, the right wheel wasn’t moving and Tombstone was just doing a circle dance. Skorpios charged and you could see at this point the plow was quite bent, but yeah, Tombstone wasn’t moving right. And Skorpios continued to charge using Newton’s laws regarding Tombstone’s weapon in its favor as the right wheel got ripped out of its normal socket, and then totally off. Tombstone slid around and Skorpios came into the corner, and the count already started?

A bit weird regarding the count unless it had started from a while back. Ray Billings noted that he had not been given the “show some movement” command from the referee, and in his opinion once the wheel was off Tombstone’s sliding could count as controlled movement. Also Skorpios also looked like it had lost movement. It would have won the judges’ decision in a double KO, but Skorpios wins by KO in 1:58, controversy or not.

Put Skorpios as a lock, and as for Tombstone, it gets a little dicey at 1-2, but tell me with a straight face that Tombstone isn’t one of the top 32 robots in the field. Come on, try it.

Without further ado, Senor’s Sixteen.

Uppercut (2-0)
Bloodsport (3-0)
Hydra (2-0)
Black Dragon (2-0)
Copperhead (2-0)
MadCatter (3-0)
End Game (1-1)
Jackpot (3-0)
SawBlaze (1-1)
Lock-Jaw (2-1)
Whiplash (1-1)
Skorpios (2-1)
Valkyrie (2-0)
Beta (2-0)
Malice (2-1)
Fusion (2-1)

Also considered: Ribbot (2-1), Shatter! (1-1), HyperShock (1-1), Perfect Phoenix (1-1), Gigabyte (1-1), Gruff (1-1)
Dropped out: Tombstone (1-2), Kraken (1-2)

And for the first time, because I actually read it (also St. John’s did a good WOOOO), here is the debut of this year’s BattleBots Bubble Watch:

LOCKS (3 FIGHTS)
Bloodsport (3-0), MadCatter (3-0), Jackpot (3-0), Lock-Jaw (2-1), Skorpios (2-1), Malice (2-1)

LOCKS (2 FIGHTS)
Uppercut (2-0), Hydra (2-0), Black Dragon (2-0), Copperhead (2-0), Valkyrie (2-0), Beta (2-0)

PROBABLES (3 FIGHTS)
Fusion (2-1), Ribbot (2-1), Tombstone (1-2)

PROBABLES (2 FIGHTS)
End Game (1-1), SawBlaze (1-1), Whiplash (1-1)

WIN AND PROBABLE/LOCK (2 FIGHTS)
SlamMow! (2-0), Shatter! (1-1), HyperShock (1-1), Perfect Phoenix (1-1), Gigabyte (1-1), Gruff (1-1), Claw Viper (1-1), Mammoth (1-1), Witch Doctor (0-2)

BUBBLE (3 FIGHTS) (in order of likelihood)
HUGE (1-2), Rotator (1-2), Kraken (1-2), SubZero (2-1), Big Dill (1-2)

ELMININATED FROM BUBBLE WITH LOSS (2 FIGHTS)
Captain Shrederator (1-1), HiJinx (1-1), P1 (1-1), Pain Train (1-1), Rusty (1-1), Slap Box (1-1), SMEEEEEEEEE (1-1), Tantrum (1-1), Ghost Raptor (0-2)

TOO EARLY TO TELL (<2 KNOWN FIGHTS)
Chomp (1-0), Deadlift (1-0), Gemini (0-1), Aegis (0-1), Gamma 9 (0-1), Grabot (0-1), Black Widow (0-0), Rampage (0-0)

Locks are in no matter what. Probables are, well, probably in. The 2-fight probables will more than likely upgrade to “lock” with a win, but could potentially drop to the bubble. The “win and probable/lock” means a win makes them likely safe, but a loss should put them squarely on the bubble. Remember, it’s a 32-bot single elimination tournament.

And there are a lot of relevant fights next week. Like, most of them. The only bots probably out of it are Extinguisher (taking on Gruff in a fire vs. firemen battle) and Atom #94 (taking on Perfect Phoenix). The rest are bots in that bubble or “probable with a win” range, except for the main event, the previously mentioned Copperhead vs. Black Dragon fight.

So with that, we’ll see you next week.