So this is how we’re punished for waking up squirrelly to watch lousy (yet entertaining) football played on a different continent? Fine.
Oak @ SD: Raiders are 2-3 with a 2 point loss to the stinking Bears as the only outlier on their sked as far as expected wins and losses. They’ve got the young troika in place (Carr, Cooper and Murray) to make things happen but the odds are against them in this long-dysfunctional franchise. The Chargers are #1 in total yards per game but only 15th in scoring. Lots of empty yards gained between the 20’s? Gordon doesn’t have a TD yet and won’t get one today (he’s out) but that has more to do with Derlaygo playing from behind a fair bit.
Dal @ NYG: Somebody on the internet told me that the last not-Romo to start and win a Cowboys game was Stephen Magee back in ’10. That can’t be right, can it? I’d look it up but I’m too damn busy writing these previews. Do you know how long it takes to look up one or two factlets and rev up the glib machine? Which Giants team will show for role call today? Will it be the shit-kickers that spanked the Slurs? How ’bout the squad that was dis-emboweled by the Eagles? Perhaps the silly squad that squeaked by the lousy 9’ers will shout “Here, Sir!” One never knows-I guess that’s why I watch every week…
BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
The Cowboys just derped like there was no derp to derp!
“And it was in that moment that Brandon Weeden began to weep, for he realized the Cowboys had no more derps left to derp.”
PERFECT ENDING
Of course!
The good thing about Lions and Chiefs next Sunday in Wembley is not one Sheppard’s Pie or English Breakfast in the entire London metro area will go uneaten thanks to Andy Reid being there.
In fact, dishwashers can take the day off.
As much as I hate to admit it, I kind of want the Cowboys to win, and then the Eagles to lose, because then every team in the NFC East will be 3-4, and I enjoy chaos. The only problem with this scenario is the Cowboys would be ahead because of their division record.
Oh, and as soon as I type that, the probability of that event drops to near zero.
Joe Buck’s mascara beard gives me the willys.
Joe Buck’s head should never be shown on TV.
And why is he fucking dying his beard black???
AAAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH JOE BUCK’S BEARD
I’ll never understand why guys cultivate on their face what grows wild on their ass.
It’s part of the transition from a hunter/gatherer to an agrarian society.
I grow a beard, but it’s because I’m bald/shaved on top and I think shaved head guys with no facial hair are creepy-looking.
/is probably still creepy-looking
And now they are pretending it was the right call and getting everyone to stick with the story.
http://pigroll.com/img/carl_on_duty.jpg
Call of Duty: Halo
Does McDonald’s know that other restaurants have been doing all-day breakfast for years?
#IdontThinkSo
Now that I think about it, empanadas are really just a type of turnover. Therefor it is fitting that I’m making three. One BBQ pork, one spinach, and one sweet corn.
There’s a Mexican bakery near that makes excellent dessert empanadas, but I’ll also destroy a few savory ones when available. Never tried sweet corn.
I love me some sweet corn. Putting it in empanada form just makes it better.
Wow. Just awful officiating in the Chargers/Raiders game. 5 minutes to get an easy call wrong.
Yeah, that was insane how long it took to get that right.
You still have to pass once, right?
WHOOOOO!!!!
Fallout 4. So geeking out…
Officials have no idea what’s going on the Chargers/Raiders game right now.
Mike Carey has an annoying voice.
Eli: Ok. I got this fellas.
Game. Can’t win after three turnovers, it is written.
http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view3/4682184/hahaha-beautiful-o.gif
Say what you will about Cassell, he has not thrown one interception when handing the ball off to a running back.
Another Hunger Games? Did Woody Harrelson run out of weed money already?
They end after this one, because their Amazon Grocery order finally arrives.
You spelled “PCP” wrong.
Unfortunately he still has his father’s debt to society to pay.
OT! OT! OT! OT! OT!….no?
Matt Sacksel
It’s been awhile since we had an INT…
DBs are all gassed from the returns and don’t bother catching them any more
I like this sort of thinking…
And up next, Eagles derp!
Your fingers to God’s ears…
Yep
Today in the NFL: the NFC East does their best to out-stupid each other, while the AFC South gets embarrassed around the country. Also: the Bills and Jags do their best to ensure soccer remains the most popular sport in the world!!!
You just summarized the NFL. All sportswriters are now out of a job.
But…. If they don’t write stupid shit, what will wake me up in the morning? I’m not going back to coffee.
Adrenochrome?
http://i.imgur.com/Odc0Z.jpg
How long does it take to cook oxtail stew?
Answer: fucking forever.
Yup. Let it flow. Let yourself go. Slow and low… And wait.
If you can, put the pot in the oven. Speeds things up a bit.
Yeah I realized that after 4 hours and they still weren’t done; should’ve done it from the start. I ALWAYS accidentally touch the pot after I take it out of the oven though, and somehow it always burns me.
Why were the Cowboys slap-fighting one another?
Oh please jeebus let Erin Andrews interview Hardy and Dez.
Hardy would only agree if there was a futon covered in guns in easy throwing distance
I should be eating empanadas during this game. Cowboy derp is better with empanadas.
Ever had pumpkin empanadas? They’re ethereal.
That sounds amazing. I’ve had something similar, from an Afghani place.
Where in the hell was this Chargers team in the first 3 quarters?
Exactly.
I really wish Star Wars would die off already…
I think my boss may be the Cowboys special teams coach…
Eli: Hey guys! High five! C’mon! High five meeeee!
http://orig12.deviantart.net/9546/f/2008/007/1/2/12ab32b98cd7489b.jpg
http://gifsec.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/HAHA-GIF.gif
Oh dear Dallas.
I really hadn’t planned on drinking today.
Man plans, God laughs.
Is that a thing that’s possible to do as a Cowboys fan during a Cowboys game?
And THAT is why you fail.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA COWBOYS SPECIAL TEAMS GOD BLESS YOUR SHITTINESS
The boss just called me…
“Your still doing the training in the morning right?”
“Yeah…why wouldn’t I? Starts Monday and ends on Friday. I thought that was the plan”
“Just checking…I also need you to “
…I bunch of other shit that any number of yahoos in the office could do…”
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
10 MOAR D/ST POINTS
Well, that certainly wasn’t tied for very long. I can see they took my threat about the Grand Canyon seriously.
HARRISDOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
“Once dressed as Troy Airman for Halloween”
Easy to do, just dye your hair blonde and tape a Mr. Potato nose to your face.
DAMN IT I want FG, Chargers
“He just channeled his inner Troy Aikman there!”
No, pretty sure he was celebrating the touchdown there, not his alleged alternative sexuality.
Cowboys call those last two pays the Twin Towers special.
When did the Cowboys Sign Santonio Holmes?
Wow, Cassel throws to the right guy finally.
Hate me the Cowboys but that was a great catch.