If you were most of America on Sunday afternoon, you were subject to Packers at Vikings on Fox. While it was one of the few Week 11 games that provided results that were important to the final division/conference standings, unless you were a fan of college football stadiums, the Joe Buck/Troy Aikman broadcast team, or watching Teddy Bridgewater get hit while game-managing, then you might not have been all that interested in the match up.

During a break in the action, as part of their propagandizing informing viewers, the Fox team highlighted the construction activity at $1+ Billion U.S. Bank Stadium, which will be the new home of the Minnesota Vikings and the gold standard for taxpayer-supported NFL stadiums for the 18 months after its opening before the new Los Angeles Rams/Raiders/Chargers/Vikings/Jaguars Stadium is constructed. Why choose this week’s broadcast to update the nation on the project status, you ask? Well, because this was the week Heir Hammer toured the facility. And how was his visit, is your second question? Well, again I start, the 15 second muted video offered very little details beyond that Goodell was wearing a Vikings hard hat and a pristine yellow safety vest, the roof construction is complete so work can continue through the winter, and some member of the construction staff was apparently the only guy working that day as the construction site was dead during his visit.

Fortunately, as [DFO]’s Construction Insider and Civil Project Management Expert, I’m happy to fill in the highlights that were cut out from the aired portion of Goodell’s visit.

• At every pre-shift meeting during the week leading up to Goodell’s visit, crews were reminded to make sure their work areas were clean and free of “Fuck Roger Goodell” language.
• Site safety training videos were updated to enforce correct fall protection procedures when working on the roof for all workers and visitors, due to the deaths that occurred just months earlier, even though all work on the roof is complete and visitors would not have access to this part of the stadium.
• On-site staff cut the Friday workday short so that Goodell could tour the facility without being required to interact with lowly craft labor. Craft labor is still pushed by the project scheduler to complete 8 hours of work in the four hour shift.
• Goodell arrives at the project late with Zigi Wilf. Pizzas that had been ordered for the waiting construction project team are left on a plan table untouched, as Goodell arrives immediately after the Pizza Luce driver.
• Goodell is greeted by the Project Manager (PM) and Safety Supervisor (SS) who give him a ten minute Power Point on the progress they are making as well as cost-savings measures that will allow the final project to have additional upgrades that were not in the original budget. Goodell will spend these ten minutes on his Blackberry. When asked is he has any questions, Goodell will look up and ask if this stadium will be constructed will zero fatalities on the project. The PM sheepishly starts that there has already been an incident and begins to explain the measures taken to address safety moving forward but Goodell is already back to his Blackberry.
• The PM will roll up a television for the mandatory site safety video. He explains that it is three minutes and, though no work is going on, all visitors must view the video. He even jokes that the Governor had to sit through it before the groundbreaking ceremony. Goodell looks to Wilf and states that “this kind of shit never came up in Dallas.” Wilf says that they are ready for the tour.
• The SS hands new Vikings hard hats and yellow safety vests for the visitors. Goodell declines and dons a Packers hard hat and #9 Stafford orange safety vest, challenging anyone to correct him. The young Project Engineer (PE) who has been running the Power Point computer asks the SS, in a thick Chicago accent,why he never gets to wear his Bears hard hat. Goodell looks back at the PE, “Fuck the Bears and fuck Chicago.” He put on the Vikings hard hat and yellow vest.
• Touring the site with Viking.Com and Fox camera crews, the PM lists off the features of the state-of-the-art facility; Green Building Certification, 90+% local labor force, and unparalleled public safety features. Goodell nods and states that he recalls suggesting these inclusions.
• While the PM explains the roof design and natural lighting concepts, Goodell interrupts to ask how the field rolls out of the stadium. The PM says that the stadium does not include the feature due to space and budget constraints, as well as the impracticality of rolling a field outside during Minnesota winters. Goodell turns to Wilf, “And you got a Super Bowl coming here?”
• Highlighting the view from the luxury suites, the PM looks away for a split second to point out views which will be enjoyed by the wealthiest fans. When he looks back, Goodell is gone. A manhunt ensues to find the missing commissioner.
• The young PE find Goodell in a restricted access area atop the video board maintenance access. Goodell invites the PE to “come check this wiring.” When the PE walks over, Goodell shoves him through the hatch, where he falls to his death. Goodell takes off his Vikings hard hat and spouts that “these things cost more lives than they save.” Goodell leaves the stadium without rejoining the tour.
• The manhunt continues until Sunday afternoon when Goodell is aired on the live broadcast standing in the gameday crowd.

Featured Image Courtesy of @drewmagary