Den @ SD: QB Osweiler has won his first two starts (tries to beat pundits to the punch) thanks to the extraordinary coaching he’s getting from The Peyton. The Chargers beat the Jags last week to halt a six game skid. Now they’re up against Denver and it’s time to embrace another L. Perhaps the Bolts fan site that I visited should take a cue from a Niners site-start examining the teams that are jockeying for the #1 pick in the 2016 draft and see which player they should covet.
KC @ Oak: The Chiefs are nothing if not inconsistently consistent. A five game losing streak has been followed by a five game win streak. During the W run QB Spaghetti Arm has the highest QBR rating. (103) Take that, all you rifle-armed bastards! Of course he’s only thrown 6 TD’s in that time but you can’t have everything, can you? There’s good news for Oakland-the Chiefs leading sack-meister has been ruled out and Berry, Halia and Bailey are all beaten up. The Raiders squeaked by the lousy Titans last week. This young (Woodson is excluded of course) team is still learning all about that whole “consistency” thing.
Car @ NO: As far as up-and-coming stars are concerned you could do worse than dialing in on CB Josh Norman battling with WR Cooks. As for the Panthers WR’s they can’t wait to be matched up on Saints CB Browner, PFF’s worst-ranked at his position. Under HC Payton the Saints have never been a 7 point dog at home. That speaks well of the job he has done and the perceived advantage that NO has at home.
Phi @ NE: RB Murray gets the start because Matthews is out. [peruses a number of Eagles-related sites] There’s not a lot to like about Philly right now. The D has collapsed and the O is stuck in neutral. It would seem as though HC Kelly has lost the team and is playing out the string. The Gronk is out so TE Chandler becomes a nice play at that spot. Despite being banged up everywhere I doubt the Pats will have much trouble dispatching the Eagles.
Hee hee. Melvin is such a…melvin.
moar like MERKIN gordon amirite
http://169lpf2pywq9to97r2eb0xqgo4.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/melvinslitemackieosborne1-660×335.jpg
Come on Denver, MOAR defensive TDs.
My FF team has both Rivers and Denver D, so I really don’t care who Marmalard throws his TDs to.
That’s a beaut!
Booing a tie? Fair weather Boston fans
See, that’s weird that they’re like that because the weather in Boston sucks,
EVERYTHING in Bahstahn sucks!
http://i.imgur.com/5NSQoqO.jpg
My Gramma was hawt!
Why does all the cool shit happen when I’m out in the garage organizing?
This has been a pretty glorious day if one largely doesn;t care about the outcomes.
Your football self must hate you for not doing it yesterday.
I had yard work all morning. Am getting rid of those mulberry trees. All hail our conifers overlords.
Do. Not. Want
Do. Want.
Not. Sure.
Under. Consideration.
Left. Arm. Getting. Numb.
Ask. Again. Later.
Macklemore remembers when the KingDome was a stadium and not a sex act performed while wearing a crown.
Giants lose, Eagles gonna lose, Cowboys have no Romo. The Skins are gonna win the division and lose to the Seahawks in the wild card round. I have foreseen it, and rue it in advance.
you’re the doktor, you know best.
YEP
And Lo, it is written.
/pulls can out of trash
//kicks can woefully
*sigh*
Race to the bottom my friend. I don’t like it any more than you do.
FUCK YOU EAGLES YOU PIECES OF SHIT
That guy just said “speed penetrator” twice.
Shades of Sparty in Ann Arbor!
http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view3/1154967/safety-dance-3-o.gif
Did I just miss a two-point defensive conversion?
In a round-about way.
Oh, good. I saw it. Thanks CBS.
KICKING IS SO EASY YOU GUYS
YEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHH IGGGGLLEEESSS
Splooge
That’ll do, Eagles. That’ll do.
HOLY FOOK, THAT JUST HAPPENED
Is that a rouge?
I’m calling it that, even if it’s 2 points.
Massive extra point derp for teh safety!
SAFETY DANCE
We now have seen that.
All right, I just had an authentically made tomale for the first time. How screwed is my digestive system?
I developed my digestive immunity early, real tamales are my favorite thing to unwrap for Christmas.
NICE!
I asked my barber on Church and Wellesley to give me a Macklemore, so he yammered on about social justice for 10 minutes and had his assistant do the cut anyway.
http://www.mtv.com/content/ontv/vma/2013/photos/flipbooks/behind-the-scenes-gifs/macklemore/macklemore-8.gif
Mr. Perfect or Ravishing Rick Rude?
BOTH
All CAR/NO needs is the Seven Nation Army chant and the circle will be complete.
http://orig09.deviantart.net/2501/f/2012/198/2/c/butters_stotch__hipie__by_1995roblox-d57k80m.jpg
NO
Are you auditioning for Fek’s stand-in??
You know what Stewart? I like you…
Psssssssst…FOX announcers…Chip Kelly is an idiot.
Yup. Occam’s Razor FTW
http://i.imgur.com/opNEhHr.jpg
Man I hope the Eagles pull this one off…
/runs to toilet and projectile vomits.
Me too *runs to shower*
http://i.imgur.com/EnnsdD5.gif
I agree. With the vomit and all.
Am rooting for a tie.
It’s the perfect meteor game!
I don’t envy those Saints players that have to tackle Tolbert.
Officials want someone in DEN/SD to die.
Brock’s 2-minute drill skills are a wee bit lacking.
weddle you idiot
dude wants out so bad; he doesn’t give one shit.
cant say i blame him
Yeah, same. I would prefer he remain healthy above anything else, and there’s no sense trying to do to much with nothing on the line for the team.
So, did he leave an obvious paper trail which will allow the Feds to track him to his cabin in the woods.
Who’s the guy with the gray rectangle on his butt? Is his butt so hot it needs to be censored?
http://i.imgur.com/La31pOD.gif
THIS CAROLINA VS. NEW ORLEANS I CALL IT CHARLIE SHEEN HOUSE PARTY ‘CAUSE THAT’S THE LAST TIME I SAW BALLS GET SO LOOSE
http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view1/4627475/macklemore-o.gif
This place needs something…
http://images6.fanpop.com/image/photos/35700000/Macklemore-GIFs-macklemore-35717270-450-253.gif
http://s2.postimg.org/erjfpnqnd/DOUCHE_O_METER.jpg
Hey Guys and Gals!
What I miss?
Early games were interesting.
Late games not so much.
All the Giants fans are dead, all the Jets fans are like, REALLY confused.
Mr. Pibb or Dr. Pepper?
Lil’ Sweet will CUT A BITCH
Dr. Pepper. Is that really your question?
Yes. Yes it is.
Mr. Pibb must be a northern thing. I remember it when I lived in Illinois, don’t see it much down here in Jerrel-Country.
Dr. Thunder?
What movies is he in?
Sausage pizza delivery movies.
With a free 2 liter!
Huzzah, CrabtreeDOWN!
I really like Amanda Tapping
This is the sound of one hand fapping.
These games are a lot stupider than the early games.
They almost broke Newton.
Guess who is the Painther back-up.
http://40.media.tumblr.com/fd7c09b803e664146beff915fed64915/tumblr_nyfy9h3YwB1syvjuco1_500.jpg
Hey, Methuselah just got another INT for Oakland!
THAT is the Kelce I benched last fucking week
Did anyone see the Giants post game press conference? Apparently JPP exasperated his hand injury so they are going to make that club on his hand slightly more protective.
Donald Brown did a good thing? *checks soup for hallucinogenics*
PeyPey, at home: “Goddamnit, Donald”
scotchy – I can do SNF lead-in for ya
oh wait just saw your comment – never mind!
he says it’s covered now
I’m sure everyone will appreciate my half-assed effort.
/not fair to drop it on someone late in the day