Your Happy Scrappy 4PM Slate Open Thread

TB @ Car: And lo! What have we here? Another game that means nada. Looking at the Panthers over the last couple of games you can see some Parcells-approved chinks in their armour. The loss to Atl, the squeaker vs. the Giants and t’udder close call against the Saints indicate that Carolina is somewhat vulnerable. Or more likely, they just need to re-focus. And what better team to do that against than the “lost last 4 of 5” Tampa Bucs?

Oak @ KC: I’m just not feeling this one. KC’s rolling and the Raiders, despite showing great promise for the next few years, are circling the drain. Maybe these guys can channel their inner ’90’s tendency to knock the stuffing out of each other and we end up with a watchable game.

SD @ Den: Can not wait to see S Weddle play today! Wait. What? He was placed on IR? He was fined 10K for watching his daughter perform at half-time? He showed up the team’s medical staff by running sprints in front of reporters? When will this San Diego-appropriate madness end!?!?!? This is most likely the last time you’ll see WR Floyd and TE Gates so drink that all in. Rivers will probably end up forcing the ball into both of them making it that much easier for 1.) the Denver D to win this game on its own and 2.) Chargers management to say goodbye to HC McCoy on Monday.

Sea @ Den: This should be a good one. Over the last six games these two squadrons are 1 and 2 in yards gained per game. The difference could be that during that same time the Cards are +11 in turnover margin. PFF’s number one FS, Arizona’s Mathieu ran into the worst three letters in the alphabet that an active football player could-ACL. CTE being the worst three that a retired player could run into. But really, they wouldn’t be the Cards if they didn’t have a significant player go down with a season-ender, would they?

StL @ SF: BRRRRR! Do you feel a draft? So do these guys.

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Bortleback

So if the Broncos win this, it still doesn’t count towards Peyton’s win total because he didn’t start the game, right?

makeitsnowondem

It’s my understanding it does count.

King Hippo

Roby is the only guy in the secondary who showed up today

makeitsnowondem

Roby’s in full hero mode. If you replaced him with Kayvon Webster we’d already be out of this game.

King Hippo

no pressure, yet there’s a WR wide the fuck open

King Hippo

FOUR starters out from the SD line, and they are still moving the fucking ball

Doktor Zymm

The Browns aren’t on the longest playoff losing streak because they haven’t made it to the playoffs enough. I’m not even making fun, that’s just truth.

JustStopDude
Shogun Marcus

I don’t think anyone has intentionally noticed him in at least 20 years. Like pk.

JustStopDude

I’ve never noticed how often he kills kids in his movies…

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WCS

The rare 50-round handgun magazine.

makeitsnowondem

Easy mistake to make but that’s Teddy Bridgewater.

Bloody Lethal
rockingdog

are those Hockey Sticks for legs?

...

I have no ice. This is a problem for drink making.

litre_cola

Snow?

makeitsnowondem

I got nothing.

ThePirateSloth
litre_cola

Canadian Icon!

Romonobyl

Make sure it’s fresh, and relatively white.

Doktor Zymm

And people laughed and said “What do you need that for” when I was trying to buy a countertop ice maker.

Frozen peas will work, if you have any.

...

I know! Growing up with an ice maker, I considered it an essential household appliance–especially considering we had a dishwasher that had to be attached to the kitchen sink faucet to work!

To find out that it is not has turned me into an ice maker diva.

rockingdog

hey look Drew Stanton threw another pick.

Old School Zero

If Chargers lose, I’ll be sad we blew another week 17 game against a backup QB.

makeitsnowondem

+1

makeitsnowondem

Hey KH, sorry you weren’t playing in the championship game today in my idiot league. You deserved that imaginary trophy way more than I do.

evilbeaver8

So if this were to end in a tie…Donks win division and 3rd seed?

King Hippo

yes

Redshirt

Yup.

makeitsnowondem

christ

rockingdog

shit.

Romonobyl

Hard to fool Manti Te’o.

King Hippo

Gonna lose at home to the ENTIRE AFC West

litre_cola

A Manti T’ao sighting!

...

Cleveland will be a failure of a franchise forever and ever.

nomonkeyfun

Wow, that is really a contrarian take.

Old School Zero

Pheel: “Can’t tell if it was Vasquez or Garcia.”

RAYCESS

WCS

One was in Aliens, the other wasn’t?
http://elaine.la/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/4tmvsy.jpg

King Hippo

Gotta fucking catch that

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

BEERGH padding his stats in the Chiefs game.

Romonobyl
...

Happy New Year’s!

makeitsnowondem

Theory: Osweiler’s only job was to help develop and test an offense that would work when Manning came back.

litre_cola

Cue the Fetushead cocksucking by Peter King.

JustStopDude

Sounds like Dashaun Phillips, skins, is going to be okay. Sounds like an extreme stinger. Hospital reports he has full movement.

Doktor Zymm

Yeah, they were saying he had movement not too long after being carted off. Still scary as hell when something like that happens, and there can still be soft tissue issues, like ripped neck tendons which can be career ending.

Redshirt

Where was that defense last Monday, My Little Assholes?!

Old School Zero

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Doktor Zymm

My kimchi came out well too! So far my “making and eating more fermented foods” thing is going awesome. On the minus side, I bet my apartment smells really odd right now.

Doktor Zymm

And it looks like the games got better while I was making stuff.

nomonkeyfun

I wouldn”t say odd. Just really good.

/Lives in a town that is more than half Korean.
/Looking at you Sill.

Shogun Marcus

Another staredown? Awesome!

nomonkeyfun

I wish. I assume he and I live in the same county in Jersey.

Romonobyl

How long did the kimchi take to make?

Doktor Zymm

Actually putting together all the ingredients was fairly time consuming, maybe an hour or 1.5, but after that you just have to leave it out to age for a bit.

Don T

Holy shit Denver. Please don’t foist Manning heroics on us.

Moonbatting Average

So the Universe really does want the Patriots to have home field.

The Universe is an asshole.

Recovery Whiskey

Number one pass defense in the NFL no match for King Lazerface

fleshwound_NPG

Can’t. Stop. Fucking. The. Dog.

Redshirt

Chargers do a good? Chargers do a good!

rockingdog

wheres the flag? theres gotta be a flag, right?

ThursdaySkyGoddess

False start on the XP.

makeitsnowondem

what the hell happened

King Hippo

Un-fucking-believable

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

So my wife is all pissed off at me because instead of walking the dog (earlier than her normal walking time) I’m insisting on watching the last quarter of Raiders football for the next six months. And to top it all, the Raiders are sucking!

rockingdog

niners-rams going into overtime? oh gosh…

WCS

Can The Flow save Coach Tomsula from the evil Mustachioed Fisherman? Tune in next to find out!

King Hippo

if any two teams don’t want to see their seasons end, certainly it’s these two

blackroseMD1

That is the best false start I’ve ever seen.

Redshirt

Factory GM has been canned.

litre_cola

Chip Kelly is a coming!

Recovery Whiskey

Not if Jed York wants him more

litre_cola

There is no good players there for him to trade away for magic beans and a broken LB

JustStopDude

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makeitsnowondem

Acura Groundhog Day Guy is a dick. Every day he relives the Christmas his wife got him a car, and every day he runs out the door without asking if she wants to come with him.

Old School Zero

His mistress flies out early afternoon, so he’s gotta hustle.

...

A random Facebook friend said her New Year’s Eve was horrible. As a point of comparison, she said this year was worse than a past New Year’s Eve when someone, during the kiss at midnight, threw up into her mouth.

I think I need to ask her what happened.

litre_cola

Let us know about that would ya?

Bortleback

I would also like details (assuming it’s funny rather than horrific)

...

I’m still wanting to hear what lead up to the “puke in my mouth at midnight” story.

Redshirt

I hope Brock enjoys playing in Cleveland next year.

litre_cola

Chip Kelly approved good Pac 12 boy. White too!

Doktor Zymm

It worked! I made injera! Including making the starter, this is basically a 5 day process, so I’m really way too proud of the fact that I made super awesome injera just like in a restaurant.
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Old School Zero

So jelly.

ThePirateSloth

I just tried to take a bite out of my screen.

Romonobyl

That reminds me, I have to pick up the cat from the vet…
Just kidding!!!! Looks like it’s supposed to, taste good?

Doktor Zymm

Delicious! The first one I made too thick, so it didn’t bubble right, but I think I got the griddling technique down now.

fleshwound_NPG

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ThursdaySkyGoddess

Is that random Packers fan asleep?

ThePirateSloth

Holding his cat

...

HOW DOES A CAT GET INTO A FOOTBALL GAME?

hippofant

In a clear plastic bag?

...

I laughed at this way harder than I should have.

Bloody Lethal

Obligatory Aaron Rodgers not liking pussy joke.

ThursdaySkyGoddess

I didn’t even see the cat!

JustStopDude

Awesome! Job opening in an island paradise!!!

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King Hippo

KAYVON DID A GOOD!

litre_cola

And there is the WTF of the day, Cam Newton named his kid Chosen for fuck sakes.

Maybe he is just a Karate Kid 2 fan.

JustStopDude

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Doktor Zymm

Name :
First, Chosen Last, Newton

Bloody Lethal

So many better choices out there…

http://f.tqn.com/y/inventors/1/W/_/t/1/fignewton.jpg

Redshirt

Here goes nothing.

blackroseMD1

How I feel as a Charger fan this year…

http://i.imgur.com/VaWFcLh.gifv

Old School Zero

I’m sad I came up with a humorous Boltman character during this year.

King Hippo

How do you leave Woodhead completely alone??

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
evilbeaver8

Better question: Why are we all familiar with a mediocrity like Woodhead?

JustStopDude

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Old School Zero

Genius.

litre_cola

I do enjoy when you all post bizarre products and incorrect foreign signs. Always makes me chuckle.

Bought some Coon cheese in Oz a month ago and told my buddies that there is no fucking way that this would fly over here.

ThePirateSloth

Not recommended for the peanut allergic.

makeitsnowondem

PHIL: i reached my conclusion by listening to coaches and reporters instead of watching what was happening
JIM: you dumbshit