DFO, money comes in – Playoffs update!

Last week, all the home teams were underdogs.  They all lost, but some covered.  This mostly helped King Hippo to keep the lead even though his two picks flopped.  WhyEaglesWhy split, but a favorable increase in bet size on the right wagers made it an overall positive week.  DTZM fell a bit further back in third.   This week, it’s the road teams’ turn to be the underdogs.  Which way will it go?

The odds for this weekend’s playoff games as of Thursday, January 14, 2016 are as follows:

Kansas City +4.5 at New England

Green Bay +7 at Arizona

Seattle +1 at Carolina

Pittsburgh +7 at Denver

I propose a deal:  If KC plus the 4.5 points is a winning bet, I get $200 fresh dollars with which to bet the Conference Championship games and Super Bowl.  If the bet is a loser, I will write a post that will detail my reactions to watching Love Actually in its entirety.  In honor of Alan Rickman.  What say you, gentlemen?

WhyEaglesWhy

Well shit. I’m the last to put my picks in, and everyone else is pushing the boat out, so I will too. Can I use some of my money on an over/under for games Doug Pederson coaches in Philadelphia? I’m staying the hell away from Chiefs/Pats, mostly because I secretly think the Chiefs are going to win but I’m too much of a pussy to bet on it. I have opinions on the others though.

Seahawks +1 over PANTHERS – The Seahawks look good and (HOT TAEK WARNING) I think the Panthers are the worst 15-1 team ever. I think this is actually a good line, but I like the Seahawks in a close, low scoring game similar to their game last week against the Vikings. Stakes: $22 to win $20.

CARDINALS -7 over Packers – To quote Cris Carter, C’MON, MAN! Stakes: $55 to win $50.

BRONCOS -7 over Steelers – The Ben is broken, and DeAngelo Williams and Antonio Brown are out. So basically the Steelers will be the “fourth preseason game” Steelers. Even if we see Brock Osweiler (and I think we will), the Broncos win handily. Stakes: $66 to win $60.

DTZM

First off, I accept your wager.  We’re all playing with house money, so you’re back in if the Chefs pull it out, pal.  OK, I have $157 to play with, right?  Let’s go with:

Arizona -7.  The Packers have been trying to end this season for weeks, and the Cards aren’t going to get pushed around like the [REDACTED]s did last week by fat Eddie Lacy and James “Again?” Starks.  Arizona wins in a walk.  $44 to win $40.

Denver -7.  I mean, Ben can’t throw, Brown isn’t playing, they have no running backs to speak of, and Denver has had 2 weeks to put all of Humpty Dumpty’s parts back together.  Pittsburgh also hasn’t looked good since losing DeAngelo Williams, and are unlikely to rebound without Brown also.  Vontaze Burfict may as well have burned down Primanti Bros and kicked Sill in the groin, he did so much damage to Pittsburgh.  $44 to win $40.

King Hippo

I am torn this week. I really believe The Ben is The Broken, but I absolutely 100% refuse to jinx my beloved Donks. I simply have no read whatsoever on Chefs/P*ts. However, I have strong feelings about the other two contests.

PANTHERS -1 over Seahawks. The SeaTruther bandwagon is getting WAY too full. Carolina is still the better team, the better pass defense, AT HOME, and with the better QB. Bet $110 to win $100.

CARDINALS -7 over Packers. Nothing in Aaron Rodgers sub-6 YPA last week evidenced that he (or the Packers as a whole) have turned or will turn a corner. This will be another ass-blasting. Bet $77 to win $70.

Name Balls of Steel Initial Bankroll: 200

Pick # Favorite Underdog Line Wager Winner? Winnings Bankroll Balance
1 San Diego
Detroit 3 11 Y 10.00 210.00
2 Minnesota San Francisco 2.5 11 N -11.00 199.00
3 Tennessee Cleveland 1 11 N -11.00 188.00
4 Philadelphia Dallas 5.5 11 Y 10.00 198.00
5 NY Jets Philly 2.5 11 Y 10.00 208.00
6 Indianapolis Tennessee 3 11 Y 10.00 218.00
7 Oakland Chicago 3 11 N -11.00 207.00
8 Buffalo Tennessee 2.5 11  Y 10.00 217.00
9 Kansas City Chicago 9 11  Y 10.00 227.00
10 Green Bay St. Louis 9 11  N -11.00 216.00
11  St. Louis Cleveland 5.5 11 N -11.00 205.00
12 Arizona Baltimore 7.5 11 N -11.00 194.00
13 New England Miami 8 11 N -11.00 183.00
14 Kansas City Detroit 5 11 N -11.00 172.00
15 Minnesota Chicago 1.5 11 Y 10.00 182.00
16 Pittsburgh Oakland 4 22  Y 20.00 202.00
17 Washington New Orleans PK 11  N -11.00 191.00
18 New England NY Giants 7 11 Y 10.00 201.00
19 Miami Dallas PK 11 Y 10.00 211.00
20 Seattle San Francisco 12.5 11 N -11.00 200.00
21 New England Buffalo 7 11 PUSH 0 200.00
22 New England Denver 3 55  N -55.00 145.00
23 NY Jets NY Giants 2.5 11  N -11.00 134.00
24 Miami Baltimore 4 11 Y 10.00 144.00
25 Buffalo Houston 3 11 N -11.00 133.00
26 Carolina Atlanta 7.5 33 N -33.00 100.00
27 St. Louis Tampa Bay 2.5 11 N -11.00 89.00
28 Jacksonville Atlanta 3 11 N -11.00 78.00
29 New England NY Jets 3 78  N -78.00 0.00

Name WhyEaglesWhy Initial Bankroll: 200

Pick # Favorite Underdog Line Wager Winner? Winnings Bankroll Balance
1 Denver Baltimore 4.5 11 N -11.00 189.00
2 Houston Kansas City 1 11 Y 10.00 199.00
3 Carolina Houston 3 11 N -11.00 188.00
4 NY Giants Atlanta 3 11 Y 10.00 198.00
5 Philadelphia Dallas 5.5 11 Y 10.00 208.00
6 Cleveland Oakland 3.5 11 Y 10.00 218.00
7 Miami Buffalo 3 11 Y 10.00 228.00
8 Oakland Chicago 3 11 N -11.00 217.00
9 Philadelphia New Orleans 4.5 11  N -11.00 206.00
10 Arizona Detroit 2.5 22 Y 20.00 226.00
11 Houston Indianapolis 1 11 Y 10.00 236.00
12 New England Indianapolis 7.5 22  N -22.00 214.00
13 Philadelphia NY Giants 4.5 11 N -11.00 203.00
14 St. Louis Cleveland 5.5 11  N -11.00 192.00
15 Miami Houston 4 11  Y 10.00 202.00
16 Washington Tampa Bay 3 11  N -11.00 191.00
17 Kansas City Detroit 5 11  N -11.00 180.00
18 Minnesota Chicago 1.5 11 N -11.00 169.00
19 New Orleans NY Giants 3 11 Push 0 169.00
20 Pittsburgh Cincinnati PK 11  Y 10.00 179.00
21 Baltimore San Diego 3.5 11 Y 10.00 189.00
22 Atlanta San Francisco 7 11 N -11.00 178.00
23 New York Giants Tampa Bay 2.5 11 Y 10.00 188.00
24 San Diego Chicago 4 11  Y 10.00 198.00
25 Oakland Minnesota 3 11  Y 10.00 208.00
26 Seattle Arizona 3 11  Y 10.00 218.00
27 Miami Dallas PK 22  Y 20.00 238.00
28 Washington Dallas 4.5 11  N -11.00 227.00
29 Denver San Diego 4 11  Y 10.00 237.00
30 Seattle Minnesota PK 11 Y 10.00 247.00
31 Tennessee Jacksonville 2.5 11 Y 10.00 257.00
32 New England Philadelphia 9.5 11  Y 10.00 267.00
33 Cincinnati Pittsburgh 2.5 11  Y 10.00 277.00
34 St. Louis Detroit PK 11 N -11.00 266.00
35 New England Houston 3 33 Y 30.00 296.00
36 Carolina NY Giants 4.5 11  Y 10.00 306.00
37 Arizona Philadelphia 4.5 22 Y 20.00 326.00
38 Jacksonville Atlanta 3 11 N -11.00 315.00
39 Denver Cincinnati 3.5 11  N -11.00 304.00
40 Pittsburgh Baltimore 10 11 N -11.00 293.00
41 New England NY Jets 3 22 N -22.00 271.00
42 Philadelphia Washington 3 11 Y 10.00 281.00
43 NY Jets Buffalo 3 33  N -33.00 248.00
44 Pittsburgh Cleveland 10.5 22 Y 20.00 268.00
45 Kansas City Oakland 6.5 11  N -11.00 257.00
46 Green Bay Minnesota 3 11  Y 10.00 267.00
47 Kansas City Houston 3 44  Y 40.00 307.00
48 Pittsburgh Cincinnati 3 22 Y 20.00 327.00
49 Green Bay Washington 1 22 N -22.00 305.00
50 Seattle Minnesota 5 33 N -33.00 272.00
51 Carolina Seattle 1 22 -22.00 250.00
52 Arizona Green Bay 7 55 -55.00 195.00
53 Denver Pittsburgh 7 66 -66.00 129.00

 

Name King Hippo Initial Bankroll: 200

Pick # Favorite Underdog Line Wager Winner? Winnings Bankroll Balance
1 Green Bay Chicago 7 22 N -22.00 178.00
2 Cincinnati Oakland 3 11 N -11.00 167.00
3 New England Buffalo 1 55 Y 50.00 217.00
4 New England Jacksonville 13.5 11 N -11.00 206.00
5 Seattle Chicago 14.5 11 N -11.00 195.00
6 Oakland Chicago 3 55 N -55.00 140.00
7 Atlanta Washington 7 22  Y 20.00 160.00
8 Tampa Bay Jacksonville 3 22  N -22.00 138.00
9 Denver Oakland 4.5 33  N -33.00 105.00
10 New England Indianapolis 7.5 44  N -44.00 61.00
11 Atlanta New Orleans 3.5 33 Y 30.00 91.00
12 Seattle Carolina 7 22  Y 20.00 111.00
13 Carolina Philadelphia 3 33  Y 30.00 141.00
14 Houston Tennessee 3 11  N -11.00 130.00
15 Seattle Dallas 6 11 Y 10.00 140.00
16 Atlanta Tampa Bay 7 11 Y 10.00 150.00
17 Kansas City Detroit 5 22 N -22.00 128.00
18 Pittsburgh Oakland 4 11 Y 10.00 138.00
19 Cincinnati Cleveland 11.5 11  N -11.00 127.00
20 Philadelphia Dallas 2.5 11  N -11.00 116.00
21  Baltimore Jacksonville 5.5 22  Y 20.00 136.00
22 Green Bay Detroit 11.5 33  N -33.00 103.00
23 Jacksonville Tennessee 3 33  Y 30.00 133.00
24 Atlanta Indianapolis 5.5 22 Y 20.00 153.00
25 New England Buffalo 7 33 PUSH 0.00 153.00
26 Dallas Carolina 1.5 153  Y 139.00 292.00
27 Seattle Minnesota PK 55  N -55.00 237.00
28 New England Philadelphia 9.5 22 N -22.00 215.00
29 New York Jets NY Giants 2.5 22 N -22.00 193.00
30 Pittsburgh Indianapolis 7 11 N -11.00 182.00
31 Arizona Minnesota 8.5 33  Y 30.00 212.00
32 Chicago Washington 3 22  Y 20.00 232.00
33 Indianapolis Jacksonville PK 22 Y 20.00 252.00
34 NY Giants Miami 1 11 Y 10.00 262.00
35 St. Louis Tampa Bay 2.5 33  N -33.00 229.00
36 Cincinnati San Francisco 4.5 22  Y 20.00 249.00
37 Denver Cincinnati 3.5 55  Y 50.00 299.00
38 Seattle St. Louis 13.5 22 Y 20.00 319.00
39 Philadelphia Washington 3 22 Y 20.00 339.00
40 Detroit San Francisco 9.5 11 N -11.00 328.00
41 NY Jets Buffalo 3 22  Y 20.00 348.00
42 Carolina Tampa Bay 10.5 22 N -22.00 326.00
43 Denver San Diego 9 11 Y 10.00 336.00
44 St. Louis San Francisco 3.5 11 Y 10.00 346.00
45 Kansas City Houston 3 33 N -33.00 313.00
46 Green Bay Washington 1 22 N -22.00 291.00
47 Carolina Seattle 1 110 -110.00 181.00
48 Arizona Green Bay 7 77 -77.00 104.00

Name Darkest Timeline Zack Morris Initial Bankroll: 200

Pick # Favorite Underdog Line Wager Winner? Winnings Bankroll Balance
1 Seattle St. Louis 4.5 11 N -11.00 189.00
2 Denver Baltimore 4.5 11 N -11.00 178.00
3 Baltimore Oakland 5.5 11 N -11.00 167.00
4 New Orleans Tampa 5.5 11 N -11.00 156.00
5 Indianapolis Jacksonville 9 22 Y 20.00 176.00
6 Oakland Chicago 3 11 N -11.00 165.00
7 Cincinnati Kansas City 5.5 55 N -55 110.00
8 Buffalo NY Giants 4.5 22 Y 20 130.00
9 Kansas City Chicago 9 11 N -11.00 119.00
10 Cincinnati Seattle 3 11 PUSH 0 119.00
11 Seattle Carolina 7 11  Y 10 129.00
12 Arizona Pittsburgh 3 11  Y 10 139.00
13 Atlanta San Francisco 7 11 N  -11.00 128.00
14 Cincinnati Cleveland 11.5 11 Y 10.00 138.00
15 New Orleans Washington PK 55  N -55.00 83.00
16 Carolina Tennessee 5 11 Y 10.00 93.00
17 Philadelphia Tampa 5.5 11  Y 10.00 103.00
18 Chicago Denver 1 44 Y 40.00 143.00
19 Atlanta Jacksonville 3 44  N -44.00 99.00
20 Arizona Philadelphia 3.5 33 Y 30.00 129.00
21 Houston Jacksonville 6 129  Y 117 246.00
22 Pittsburgh Cincinnati 3 44  N -44.00 202.00
23 Seattle Minnesota 5 44 N -44.00 158.00
24 Kansas City Houston 3 11 Y 10.0 168.00
25 Green Bay Washington 1 11 N -11.00 157.00
26  Arizona Green Bay  7  44  -44.00 113.00
27 Denver Pittsburgh 7 44 -44.00 69.00

 

ballsofsteelandfury

ballsofsteelandfury

International Member of the Geelong Cats and recovering Steelers fan. Likes Butts. And Balls. And Boobs. Pretty much anything that starts with the letter B. Preferably together.
ballsofsteelandfury

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Moose -The End Is Well NighballsofsteelandfuryDon TlaserguruSenor Weaselo Recent comment authors
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laserguru

I’m hearing the sirens song of chicken vindaloo, basmati rice and garlic naan calling me.

Better get to the gym first.

I’m also thinking about a Sunday Gravy post that may post on Monday but it will require two days worth of prep to bring to fruition. Guess I better get moving.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
laserguru

I think I’m going to two team KC and AZ today.
I am destined for abject failure.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Doktor Zymm

I would be really happy if the Chiefs won, so that means it’s not gonna happen.
I also predict that THE BEN tries to play when the Steelers are at 3 and goal, tries to throw a pass, but instead his whole arm comes off, still holding the ball, and crosses the goal line. Is that a TD? THE OFFICIALS HAVE NO FUCKING CLUE. He then plays the rest of the game as one armed punter.

Also, how distasteful would a Packers/Seahawks NFC Champ game be? If that happens…ew.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Let’s get a review on that.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

Would Packers/Seahawks be more ew than being filled with goo? I’d imagine yes.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Senor Weaselo

I’d guess it’s either a fumble or an incomplete pass because he’s not in control of his arm. So they’ll call it a field goal.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“Personal foul; The Fugitive-ing the quarterback.”

Kungjitsu
Kungjitsu

There are a bunch of titties in Love Actually. And while the plot may be as dumb and creepy as Attack Of The Clones, there are still the titties. It also may be the last time Liam Neeson was in a movie where he didn’t kill a whole bunch of people.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Agreed and the Brit romcoms are slightly, SLIGHTLY less annoying than Hollywood ones.

I tried giving some examples below, but apparently I suck at de posting this morning.

http://57.media.tumblr.com/50fe683e4e9ec98e60a46ac2c2945a4e/tumblr_mayvr6BLdS1r3sbdso3_r2_250.gif

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I think balls is getting tired of my Cephalopodic stalking. Octoping all his posts with graphic Coleoideas. Well, suid pro quo. The carcass is still recognizable as a horse.

http://56.media.tumblr.com/db82690c43417d9dad5259e07539c2c4/tumblr_nj817yMP6u1u38e33o1_500.jpg

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

The scientific Latin term octopus was derived from Ancient Greek ὀκτώπους (oktōpous), which literally translates to “eight-foot” (ὀκτώ “eight” + πούς “foot”). Related to the word “octopus” are the term “Octopoda” (the taxonomic order of cephalopod mollusks that comprises the octopuses) and the adjective “octopoid”.

The standard pluralized form of “octopus” in the English language is “octopuses” /ˈɒktəpʊsɪz/, although the Ancient Greek plural “octopodes” /ɒkˈtɒpədiːz/, has also been used historically. The alternative plural “octopi” — which misguidedly assumes it is a Latin “-us”-word — is considered grammatically incorrect. It is nevertheless used enough to make it notable, and was formally acknowledged by the descriptivist Merriam-Webster 11th Collegiate Dictionary and Webster’s New World College Dictionary. The Oxford English Dictionary (2008 Draft Revision) lists “octopuses”, “octopi”, and “octopodes”, in that order, labeling “octopodes” as rare and noting that “octopi” derives from the misapprehension that octōpus comes from Latin. In contrast, New Oxford American Dictionary (3rd Edition 2010) lists “octopuses” as the only acceptable pluralization, with a usage note indicating “octopodes” as being still occasionally used but “octopi” as being incorrect.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
BrettFavresColonoscopy

If the Seahawks beat the Panthers, Ron Rivera should have to let Pete Carroll drip hot candle wax melted by steel beams on his nipples.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
entropy

I like Balls’ deal; either he wins, and he’s got a ton of fake money to bet next weekend, so he suffers through THOSE picks, or he’s got to watch Love Actually and we get to watch him suffer through that nightmare.

Win win!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
King Hippo

Sure, let Balls back in if he’s right!

Also, I had an EPL thread scheduled, but it seems to have disappeared into the ether and I can’t even find it in drafts now. Sorry, the 2-3 peeps who enjoy Lesser Footy as an appetizer.

laserguru

I received an email yesterday afternoon that said the EPL post had posted but I didn’t see hide nor hair of it since.
Strange spaghetti in the solemn city.

Don T

Take it from a schizo: you greatly underestimate your reach.

WhyEaglesWhy

I feel confident simply because King Hippo tried to say Cam Newton is better than Russell Wilson.
*drops mic*
*drops pants*

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Perhaps not in their respective systems.