Your “Look At You Roger! No Player (that we know of) Sullied Your Precious Game Today” Open Thread

The Roger must be working overtime babysitting all these fellas that are trouble-waiting-to-happen incarnate. I can’t see any other explanation for why the game doesn’t have a black eye again today. Pink eye is a whole different matter though-just a matter of time…

I keep harping on the NBA having so few watchable games but let’s sally forth down that dark corridor once again, shall we? Using the criteria of “teams that are more than 2 games over .500 playing each other” this league gives us…nada, nil and nothing. Using the same parameters the NHL should probably suck balls as well. Oops. Only MIN/NYR, NYI/WASH, DET/FLA, SJ/STL, PHI/NASH, DAL/COLO, CHI/ARI and ANA/LA fit the bill. College ball has #8 TAMU/VAN, COLO/#16 ORE and a tilt between two unranked teams, OSU and WISCY. The reason I bring this game to your attention is because interim coach Greg Gard was put into an impossible position (taking over for The Grinch, who retired out of nowhere) and has put together a 4 game win streak with victories over #4 MSU and # 19 Indiana. Keep an eye out for these guys-this 13-9 team is better than their current record. TO THE COMMENTS!

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Shogun Marcus
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
indieguy
indieguy

i’m looking for a source to that groovy gif but i’m coming up empty

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Schoolgirl Report 2 (1971)

Horatio Cornblower

Just a friendly reminder that Norman Braman, the guy currently bankrolling Marco Rubio, is the same guy that thought Buddy Ryan would be a great head coach.

...

So that means Rubio is a lock to carry Pennsylvania but lose nationally?

Horatio Cornblower

Not even Philly if the Eagles are any indication.

nomonkeyfun

He’ll win the Pitts region. And would win it in the general.

Sharkbait

The forecast for my city is now 8 inches of snow. I am also off. What time should I start drinking?

Shogun Marcus

Yes.

Horatio Cornblower

At least an hour ago.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

About 18″ at my place by Tuesday. A bunch of schools closed, so I hope you already started.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

That is an accurate depiction of me shoveling (minus the wealth).

nomonkeyfun

When RU waking up?

I rec 10 mins later.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Redshirt

.02 BAC ago

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Horatio Cornblower

MAAAAAAAAAAAKE OOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUTTTTTTTTT!!

Shogun Marcus
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

In no way SFW

h ttp://41.media.tumblr.com/e8ba1140ee8196568c0157575bcf6703/tumblr_o1ek2kbqr41qhad33o1_400.jpg

Unsurprised
Unsurprised
nomonkeyfun

Yah gotta love the Jerz in plathor pants.

Dat Ass.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
...

The scene in this week’s episode where she walked into the cell phone store and said her phone was problem because it wasn’t showing her any picture of dude’s junk was amazing.

...

’85 Bears Cons: Obnoxious motherfuckers who would have eclipsed the ’72 Dolphins’ obnoxiousness had they gone undefeated

’85 Bears Pros: Sacked Simms a fuckton of times and beat the Patriots

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Revealed a great fucking defense that was a pleasure to watch.

Porky Prime
Porky Prime

Yeah but beating the Patriots back then was like beating the Bears now.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I meant their defense all year long, except for the Miami game when Marino ripped them a new asshole.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

While the Pats had a good team that year there were several NFC teams that were superior.

Shogun Marcus

Rick and Morty debate: does Rick nearly attempt suicide at the end of the episode with Unity?

Sharkbait

I believe so.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

If he does it is only for selfish reasons. Have you met him?

Senor Weaselo

I also believe so.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

NSFW

h ttp://40.media.tumblr.com/cf654973b9e0315debb85a5f0803c147/tumblr_o0r6lfeKeG1uinnsao1_540.jpg

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

I can’t remember: Are any of the lawyers here also part of the Portland contingent?

Speaking of beer, I sampled some 10.5% ABV beer yesterday at a local grocer called Everybody’s Collaboration and it was amazing. I think it’s this, but I recall it being lighter than the photos. I’ve mainly abstained from drinking until this exam is over, but once it is and god willing I have money, I want to explore the wide world of Portland brewing.

https://untappd.com/b/everybody-s-brewing-collaboration-belgian-quad/1347901/photos

Horatio Cornblower

Are you studying for the bar?

Best advice I can give you is to relax. The people who pass with A’s and the people who pass with D’s are all lawyers. Don’t psych yourself out.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Yeah. Oregon bar, February exam.

Horatio Cornblower

You’ll be fine. Read your guide books a bunch and on the essays just try to identify and discuss as many related issues as you can without coming to any definite conclusions.

I mean shit, it worked for me.

Out in Oregon you might want to bone up on federal land ownership laws.

Cuntler
Cuntler

Also, study how you study. Don’t listen to random advice from people about how they did it. Dumb. I have taken and passed the California, Colorado, and Wyoming bar exams. Like Horatio said, you just have to do better than 20% of the people that take it.

WCS

Not watching the 30-For-30, but I will. Those Bears teams should have won at least another Super Bowl, if not more. Further proof Ditka really was shit.

Cuntler
Cuntler

As a born and raised Bears fan, that was amazing. Also, I wish they would have won more, but that team was just fucking perfect, including the loss. That defense was fucking amazing. That 49ers game made me so happy. They fucking CRUSHED them.

Horatio Cornblower

A quiet, sad, reflective Mike Singletary may be more terrifying than that psycho in those Saw movies.

Horatio Cornblower

Me at the liquor store today: “Hey, did you guys get the Ballast Point Pineapple yet”

Clerk: “No, but that and the mango should be in tomorrow”

Me: “See you tomorrow’

Clerk: “So just these two six-packs then?”

Me: “Yep”

Sharkbait

I’m getting 6-8 inches of snow tomorrow. The liquor store at the bottom of my street better be ready to see me again tomorrow.

Senor Weaselo

And they’d better be well-stocked.

Horatio Cornblower

Hey me too! Are we neighbors?

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

NSFW redhead

h ttp://41.media.tumblr.com/934affba48b8901359558c03a7b3e3fd/tumblr_o0qxhf04Qm1ulovy8o4_1280.jpg

Horatio Cornblower

Steve McMichael looks like hell.

I blame his stint in pro wrestling.

Senor Weaselo

Oh shit, they got real people who invested with Madoff to speak. No cameo by the Wilpons, however.

nomonkeyfun

I hate those fucking assholes.

But, fun fact for Non-Mets out there.
Fred Wilpon was a pitcher on his High School baseball team. The first baseman…

Sandy Koufax.

Horatio Cornblower

I’m watching the 30-30 on Da’ Bears. You forget how goddamn fantastic Payton was. Just ridiculous.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I was 4,I loved how he chose to hit defenders. (still a Bears fan, never quit when I moved to WI)

Cuntler
Cuntler

I was 10. Perfect team for my age. I remember asking my Dad what a slut was when all the Jim McMahon stuff came out. Good times.

Redshirt

He should’ve had a Super Bowl TD. They were toying with the Pats at the end. How could have they forgot about Payton?

Horatio Cornblower

Just one of many reasons I can’t stand Ditka.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I cant forgive him for that either

...

Who else is really enjoying the irony of a bunch of “neo-masculinists” scraping a meeting due to safety fears?

Horatio Cornblower

The fuck’s a “neo-masculinist”?

...

A scared little man who is unconscious trapped inside the belief of validating himself via a woman’s approval but who realizes such a thing is not guaranteed because woman have actual free will so he resents women and falls back on enforcing retrograde gender roles because they are a safe structure to hide beneath and ensure feminine approval by depriving a woman of the ability to choose otherwise.

Also they’re douchebags– wait, no… rooshbags. They rooshbags.

/highfives self

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Mad college virgins.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Boobs. NSFW

h ttp://36.media.tumblr.com/e58123ba92ef6f179a38d30a38bbd945/tumblr_o0n25iIKO71ulovy8o3_1280.jpg

Senor Weaselo

Gotta say Richard Dreyfuss as Bernie Madoff is doing a great job of making us hate a guy we already hate. Even if it’s a bit cheesy.

Redshirt

I still love his performance as Dick Cheney in W. I remembered Dreyfuss as the hippie-ish oceanographer in Jaws, the music teacher in Mr Holland’s Opus. I didn’t think he would be hateable enough as Cheney.

Its like Cheney’s spirit possessed Dreyfuss for the role. It was perfect.

WCS

I thought everyone cast in W. was spot-on.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

I don’t particularly hate Madoff for the same reason that he was prosecuted and Wall Street got off—he fucked over a bunch of rich people.

Senor Weaselo

This is true. I think a lot of it’s the smarm.

nomonkeyfun

And also a bunch of charities that were influenced by their rich donors. And plenty of people who were had plenty of money, but weren’t rich, just had a rich friend.

I would have been ecstatic if the Wilpons lost every penny. New ownership!

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Good point. :/

Sharkbait
Senor Weaselo
Sharkbait

I guess Imgur is still broken.

fuckyeahlundqvist.gif

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

LAWTSA FUN HAWKEY STUFF A TRANSPIRIN

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

All my dad talks about is how every show won’t shut up about Canadian teams, even though they suck. I fucking hate NBC sports I think it would be more tolerable if ESPN ever covered a sport other than football

litre_cola

It is a sad state of affairs up here bud.

WCS

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I guess?

Hillary gettin’ pissed. Bernie is just always pissed, being an old Jewish man.

Sharkbait

Not watching. Should I be?

WCS

Nah. Spare yourself the inanity.

Redshirt

Bernie: “I love Hillary, but she’s not progressive enough.”
Hillary: “I love Bernie, but he’s too extreme to get anything done.”

You’re up to speed.

nomonkeyfun

Wow, you’re reading my mind.

I’ve felt the Bern since the mid 90’s(phrasing).

But I really don’t know who I would prefer as the nominee.

Hil, she’ll make the trains run on time. But, I can’t imagine the obstructionist behavior from the Repubs in congress. They’ve hated that woman for 24 years.
But, the Bern is an avowed Socialist. The only thing more anathema to the general electorate would be a Muslim or an Atheist, and I don’t know which they would hate more.

Redshirt

The Republican Party is going to have to split off the Tea Party Cancer in order to get stuff done.

They may have to cut off a limb to save the body.

nomonkeyfun

Really, it’s like 1960’s Albie Hoffman took over Dems, but he was a mean nasty asshole.

Well he was, but you get my point.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Hillary: “I love Bernie, but he’s too extreme to get anything done.”

Worked pretty fucking well for Republicans. You don’t start negotiating from the middle. That’s amateur hour idiocy.

Redshirt

Negotiation only works if you choose a starting point with a intention to go down to what you really want.

The New Age Radical Republicans choose a starting points and stay there.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

And look what they’ve accomplished. Most especially when W was in office.

nomonkeyfun

Not because he’s an old Jewish man.

It’s because he’s a native born son of the People’s Republic of Brooklyn.

Every native Brooklynite I’ve ever met sounds like they’re pissed off at all times.

It must be the latent hatred of the rest of NYC.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

NSFW again

h ttp://40.media.tumblr.com/d2210cd1e24864f44f39748af39ddaab/tumblr_nv5i0s7d1F1usycrio1_500.jpg

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

NSFW Redhead again.

h ttp://40.media.tumblr.com/e911d7bbfd187f66dcd1b4078eb80172/tumblr_o1toc3P8Wh1uhfkqmo1_1280.jpg

Redshirt

Ah. That was worth effort to cut and paste the link.

WCS

Goddamn Bama signed 16 five-star recruits. The next highest? USC with five.

Redshirt

Sixteen?! Holy shit.

Well at least Ohio State got one Championship before the Tide began their dynasty.

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

There weren’t any Roll Tide (detergent) .gifs that weren’t imgur:(

http://dirtysports.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/Screen-shot-2014-02-26-at-8.53.40-AM.png

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
nomonkeyfun

Assuming there are curtains, I doubt they match the drapes.

The Ben would have left off the “D”.

Iwould be very happy to give her the D.

Redshirt

No, Bernie. We remember where we were 7 years ago. That’s why Jeb is in the lower single digits and the douchebags are running the asylum.

Redshirt

Wow. Hilary v2.5 is going for a 2nd Round KO to end this insurrection.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Cripes. I want this bar exam to be over already.

WCS

Is everyone here a lawyer or educator? Except Marc, he’s a just a porn hound.

Sharkbait

I make the world safe for television.

Redshirt

I’m a loveable disgrace to my family.

nomonkeyfun

Wow, I’ve met my twin.

And I’m in the admin side at a College. So sort of.

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

I’m no longer an educator.

Senor Weaselo

I play violin for fun and profit, but as a result of that I teach on the side, so I’ll retract what I just said. But “educator” seems like a strong word for me…

Beerguyrob

Odds are some of us educators are eventually going to need lawyers.

Sharkbait

DFO: Come for the football, stay for the high brow dick jokes.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

That’s why I followed you all from KSK.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Sorry admins! swear I had a space in there so it wouldnt show up

Sharkbait

Your posts are intriguing to me and I would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

Redshirt

Use the enter key to have link be multiple lines.

Porky Prime
Porky Prime

I see nuzzink!

Horatio Cornblower

Did someone down below say ‘Claudia Cardinale’ and ‘The Professionals’?

http://ia.media-imdb.com/images/M/MV5BMzk0NjYyMjYyNl5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwMzY2MTAzNA@@._V1_SX640_SY720_.jpg

nomonkeyfun

Yes, yes I did.

Fuck my phone. It won’t display the picture/gif that I assume allows the Commentariat to appreciate her “talent.”

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

http://bouncebreak.com/gif/bounce/5Ogj6lG.gif

I wanted to do no work to find a pic, but I had to go through 3 pics to find this one. I want it known I had to try to find this shitty pic

Redshirt

Your efforts are noted and appreciated.

Redshirt

This Clinton-Sanders debate, I call it a Patriots-Steelers game because no matter who wins, it’ll make me want to punk.

Sharkbait

Punk?

http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/img-thing?.out=jpg&size=l&tid=45345068

Redshirt

puke. See what the Democrats have done to the Educational System?!

WCS

Wait, another one? I thought there was one last night?

Redshirt

That was a townhall. This is a debate. Tomorrow they’re going bowling on Fox News.

Sharkbait

An ambulance just pulled up outside my apartment. Am I dead? Has the booze finally won?

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

If you were sober enough to call an ambulance you are still on the waiting list

Redshirt

Depends. Did you piss someone off while drunk? They could’ve called that ambulance for you in advance.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Re: my last comment. The rich side of my family helped Sam Walton found Walmart. Died a rich 100+ millionaire and gave it all away

American Pie Story
American Pie Story

HEY GUYS

King Hippo

hope your cold is better, your hump week excellent, and your bae search fruitful!

American Pie Story
American Pie Story

Yas, meh, buhhhhhhh
how are you Hippo

King Hippo

Reading a nice long book on the October Revolution, have a 12-hour (yes, 9am to 9-fucking-pm on a Friday) firm retreat to “look forward to” tomorrow. But have this weird feeling Denver is gonna win, so can;t complain!!

WCS

Howdy, howdy, howdy.

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

hey

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I got a Xmas check from the rich side of my family that will pay my credit card bill for a couple months, also I am entirely too drunk for 7:30. What is going on guys?

Senor Weaselo

And by that you mean “You gon drank more,” correct?

King Hippo

I’m a little ashamed to admit this…but I thought teh f/x OJ thingy was purty good.

David Schwimmer should be boiled alive, though. That guy is just the fucking worst.

King Hippo

All’s I know is, some asshole coach up and quits in November and December to try and force MY cracker ass to hire his butt-buddy assistant for a job he doesn’t really merit (otherwise, why the Dean Smith-ish shenanigans?), I fucking hire the janitor to finish out the season as the interim dude.

bourb0nblues
bourb0nblues

One of the best things leading up to Sunday is going and buying SO MUCH ALCOHOL and trying to figure out which types of strange brews to force on my friends.

Kungjitsu
Kungjitsu

I’m at the point where I want to start showing up at beer gardens with a case of Corona and a case of limes. Who wants a REAL beer?

litre_cola

At least we know Dallas is a safe place for him. His mandatory courses will be taught by Greg Hardy.

indieguy
indieguy
litre_cola

So there is no doubt after these allegations that JFF goes to Dallas now right?

King Hippo

JFF and Greg. UNDER ONE ROOF?

litre_cola

Darren Sharper says you misspelled roofie.