First off, a small mea culpa. I confused my Dale Hunter incidents with my Ron Hextall incidents and assigned them to the wrong team.
Thanks to Sill for pointing that out. Guess I shouldn’t type & teach.
For those who care, there are five NBA games tonight, and none of them have dire playoff consequences. A better choice is Part 2 of the Ken Burns PBS documentary on Jackie Robinson.
Anyway, onto the West:
Western Conference – Round One
Dallas vs Minnesota (Thurs/Sat/Mon/Wed)
On paper, not really a contest. Dallas is a high scoring, physically imposing team. But thanks to its shaky goaltending, it allowed St. Louis & Chicago to stick around in the divisional race. They haven’t been in real contention since they won their ’99 Cup and had to get the stink of Brett Hull off them, but the Benn brothers make things exciting around the net. The Wild, meanwhile, play a style that seems the illegitimate child of Jacques Lemaire’s old Devils Trap, with a goalie in Devan Dubnyk whose GAA is inflated by the other team’s lack of chances. If someone can name a player on this team, the other person is obligated to follow with, “Who’s that?”
Prediction: Dallas in 5.
St. Louis vs Chicago (Wed/Fri/Sun/Tues)
This one is tough. I have a soft spot for St. Louis, as they are the oldest team to have not won a Cup, and the three Finals they’ve been to were all in their expansion years. They’ve had good regular-season teams that ran into playoff buzz saws and just got left behind. They’ve looked really good this year, but once again face an old nemesis. Chicago is built for the playoffs, much like the Oilers teams of the 80s. Not enough people are using the word “dynasty”, but if can use it for the Spurs, then it’s appropriate here. Plus, the longer they go cuts down on the chances Patrick Kane catches more off-season criminal charges. On the other hand, FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS!
Prediction: St. Louis in 6.
Anaheim vs Nashville (Fri/Sun/Tues/Thurs)
This series is going to be all goaltending. Pekka Rinne is a beast, especially during the playoffs, and Anaheim’s goaltender-by-committee structure is going to have to settle on one horse to ride through the first round, which I don’t think they’re prepared for. Points-spread doesn’t mean much in a clutch & grab series. The deciding factor will be whether Anaheim’s size can slow down Nashville’s speed. I honestly don’t see anything exciting about this series, which means it will turn out fantastic. Fun fact: Between Games 1 & 2, the Honda Center is hosting a concert by Alan Jackson (“Five O’Clock Somehwere”), who I hope comes out in a Preds jersey, meaning they’ll have to change or cover the ice. That should make for some funny bounces in Game 2, which could impact the rate of play and possibly cost the Ducks. Gonna put the big upset here.
Prediction: Nashville in 6.
Los Angeles vs San Jose (Thurs/Sat/Mon/Wed)
This has the potential to be the only seven-game series in the first round, and a good one to boot. Both teams had plenty of scoring during the regular season, and a solid playoff rivalry in the last few years. Joe Thornton is a notorious vacationer when it comes to the playoffs, but hopefully Pavelski & Hertl can keep him focused long enough to do some damage to the opposition for a change. How much trouble Milan Lucic causes/gets into will be the question mark for the Kings’ offence, as well as how much left in the tank le grand homme Lecavalier has. Goaltending comes down to a master-apprentice battle, as Jamie Quick takes on former backup Martin Jones, who watched from the bench as the Kings won it all in 2013. If they have to substitute James Reimer in early in the series, I think the stink of Leaf confirms the probable outcome a game or two sooner.
Prediction: Kings in 7.
There you have it. You are now basically informed about the opening round. Detailed Commentist team/series previews for the West will be posted tomorrow. You’ll be able to handle any general conversation in a bar.
Don’t forget – the Ken Burns special is on PBS. Can you enjoy history if you hate baseball? WATCH & FIND OUT!
We need to get a little more fierce.
You like it when I’m fierce.
Put my faith in god put my trust in you now there’s nothing more fucked up I could do.
54 years and on my way to Hell!
Seven Mary Three – Cumbersome
(fuck it… night folks)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NjNn4bbbgSw
http://45.media.tumblr.com/3cbf08df2c15f69c6baf37dab9d6cfcf/tumblr_njayzxV1Ia1tdhimpo1_540.gif
http://45.media.tumblr.com/93587660a304786a7ef8cbbadabcc7cb/tumblr_o4zqem3kPh1u17n9io1_500.gif
Yeeeaaaahhhh!!!!!!!
AC/DC – Shoot To Thrill
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4gDch1p4c_M
http://portaldodog.com.br/cachorros/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/buldogue.jpg
Fuck dat bitch…
All American Rejects – Gives You Hell
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uxUATkpMQ8A
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2sky1tt8vLA&list=RD2sky1tt8vLA&nohtml5=False#t=0
http://49.media.tumblr.com/312667705a8fca4c8d9206a695f2f9f6/tumblr_o53vpw8YsP1r73lylo1_400.gif
Offspring – Self Esteem
(just for be-fucking cause)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eeWjzBHUdsI
Puddle of Mudd – She Hates Me
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VbgT70vuyAQ
http://41.media.tumblr.com/64864ad63fa489ffb13eb5a2031283ad/tumblr_o56hb9budF1qz6f9yo1_540.jpg
http://45.media.tumblr.com/31e30dff64e1d0be8f291ec7c7af8118/tumblr_mmjlqbIc1L1qb05aco1_250.gif
http://41.media.tumblr.com/651d431db1ba1c2527eeee097bd34213/tumblr_o3p7gsqGis1vnav4yo1_1280.jpg
http://static.wixstatic.com/media/d670e4_fb59bcf5b3a7bc828fccf0fa0f69c2ab.png_1024
I HATED this song until this version, the lesbian version.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kd5MDLDanGo
http://41.media.tumblr.com/c834ea57cb213cde8a458bdac29502ad/tumblr_o56plrC4KW1ru67qro1_1280.jpg
http://41.media.tumblr.com/21f1ef46fe7f89f4b3e4aa5163a5e53d/tumblr_o3mlwkc2qd1u4yiv6o1_540.png
Pearl Jam – Black
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QV2iYFl5eSk
http://41.media.tumblr.com/f0642aac157637a4d15fb475be63dc70/tumblr_o4ode9iJM71uducgxo1_1280.jpg
Alan Parson’s Project – Don’t Answer Me
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eAIGuVpeLi8
http://45.media.tumblr.com/66072c9b3f25b4f46e856d7751f0cffa/tumblr_o56rz3Rxnp1ubtb93o1_400.gif
http://40.media.tumblr.com/d8fc85e5d09d34d69c7dcdc92abc2165/tumblr_nkjigpMJN31rojphdo1_1280.jpg
Joy Division – Love Will Tear Us Apart
(sheesh…you happy now??? Good…bcuz I’m not done)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zuuObGsB0No
http://45.media.tumblr.com/9b4b00d43e10272929d666b0d69353a4/tumblr_njvt8jFJKH1s2wio8o1_500.gif
Currently on my ipod.
Really motivates you. I’m glad there are no sharp objects when I exercise in the mornings.
http://49.media.tumblr.com/52ffe55bedcff92b27ebd498d5cb5b48/tumblr_mhww9fGIRV1qmkr8bo1_500.gif
Crowded House – Don’t Dream It’s Over
(how fucking cliche am I…yeah, very)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J9gKyRmic20
I got mad skillz
http://i.giftrunk.com/x39gpt.gif
Anyone ever notice the similarities between these songs?
http://youtu.be/PEZpPWdUqTs
http://youtu.be/z3K6W0yI3iM
Lawsuit!!!!!!
No?
1975:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YKb-N2XYNQ0
Earlier in 1975….
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-_30HA7rec&nohtml5=False
Styx – Babe
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1FIOjLwwj-U
Cyndi Lauper – Time After Time
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VdQY7BusJNU
http://45.media.tumblr.com/0bf9a77ecef2704fafba01b433a873f6/tumblr_nkma39oNFC1st4bmvo3_500.gif
Angels win 5-4. Bad beat for the Under bettors, poor bastids.
http://41.media.tumblr.com/540d813c7bc2bbcf6f5f29059a792e12/tumblr_nksnp7Kaeb1rojphdo1_1280.jpg
I’m thinking about nicknaming Mike Socsia “Mikey two kegs” because he looks like he’s in his third tri-mester.
Dude, sit ups and a salad.
3 Doors Down – Here Without You
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kPBzTxZQG5Q
http://41.media.tumblr.com/d646e9f3ed464f8e69b71e1068d5350d/tumblr_nkn2wuDOoW1rojphdo1_1280.jpg
Hahahahaha….stop that. I’m trying to be depressed over here.
Sorry; only two doors.
Psychedelic Furs – Peel Session 1980
Hot shit
http://youtu.be/QJFBg84MI6Y
http://49.media.tumblr.com/b2e81f2d91a7e1fa205386ec9578be23/tumblr_nkn8s2qXfO1rc7zl1o2_250.gif
Moar Al Green – I’m So Tired of Being Alone
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tdw7kxD8eUc
http://49.media.tumblr.com/24cd6e8b30149aef6f196292505a7d90/tumblr_nkabhbGhjr1trhvavo1_400.gif
Fuck you, water bottle.
(working up to Joy Division)
((ammo removed from firearms))
Radiohead – Creep
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XFkzRNyygfk
Soto takes Doolittle…DEEP! for two. 5-4 Angels.
“Hummmmm….”
http://41.media.tumblr.com/b80899741fe373132b9841db7b58a4d1/tumblr_o2y7fxlzuG1tq82oxo1_500.jpg
http://49.media.tumblr.com/f70bf1c7bccc921aea33ee2a883285f0/tumblr_o4wzqhQwng1uctr63o1_500.gif
Blondie – Atomic
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_E1-VOMxS6w
Pujols doubled in two in the top of the 8th to pull the Angels within one (4-3). Top 9 coming up.
http://49.media.tumblr.com/0df9a8a839235fab86a1e46427a89e24/tumblr_njhgok9AaU1s01qkyo1_500.gif
The thing I love most about you is that when I try to explain you to people, I can’t.
Some things are better left unsaid….
http://40.media.tumblr.com/d083f37f28c9a2695ddfc5540aea0024/tumblr_nkqvo1ON511rojphdo1_500.jpg
Al Green – How Can You Mend a Broken Heart
(fuck off bee gees)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UgAFcvIw8J4
http://cdn.makeagif.com/media/5-13-2015/ZDnibB.gif
Toni Braxton – Unbreak My Heart
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p2Rch6WvPJE
The Pogues
http://youtu.be/ELN-WYKTQgY
And that’s as sad as I got till someone posts Joy Division and we can all cut our wrists and go to sleep.
Third Eye Blind – How’s It Gonna Be
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Femqf_Mel4U
WHY DO I KEEP GETTING MODERATED???? I’M A GOOD BOY (mostly).
SHUT UP!!! I LIKE THIS SONG!!!!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yf_Lwe6p-Cg
http://36.media.tumblr.com/22afad16cdf14bc9d177075070c0bab3/tumblr_nky4voqS2f1rojphdo1_540.jpg
http://49.media.tumblr.com/44cf965b58c1512a4bed5f19bd25ecdb/tumblr_naigx4DdNl1rjrvmvo2_250.gif
http://45.media.tumblr.com/e03738fc7d7b91acdb1e5c97856159d7/tumblr_nkrtj9oeGY1tlb56zo1_400.gif
SO much weed in that backpack.
Nick Lowe.
http://youtu.be/xwCbBwUCgrA
That’s gonna leave a mark.
Dixie Chicks – Landslide
(Fleetwood Mac cover)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J4_wXPZ1Bnk
http://www.allstarfrenchbulldogs.com/LilDebConeGif.gif
http://49.media.tumblr.com/9c6aba6cc6cf8c1f55d5273db1284c3b/tumblr_ns056oTc7I1tezjkso1_400.gif
Fleetwood Mac – Silver Springs
(fuck the world)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iVsy717Ej7U
Tom Petty – You Got Lucky
(probably going to bed before I put a bullet in me brain)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZTAhZKP5wCY
Bulldog puppy tab still open…
http://olivethepeople.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/rolling-puppy-animation.gif
Hey, this bar I’m at is showing highlights from the scouting combine! That should keep me from drinking less!
Good luck with that.
Loverboy – When It’s Over
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ukXCfOXMtZU
Watt, Hurley, D. Boonhttps://youtu.be/uTVl_2ENTXo
*ahem*
https://youtu.be/uTVl_2ENTXo
The Cars – Why Can’t I Have You?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9pxHjpC6-m0
New Order.https://youtu.be/SkdYRDvX3n4
http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m7ah1iABDS1r7922zo1_500.gif
Journey – Stone In Love
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kFqXFE8OSG4
Reigning 2 night champ.
Suck it.
DAMMIT!
But wow…160-ish comments before new page…that’s cray cray.
WINNER!
http://golf.swingbyswing.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/Rodney_Dance_Caddyshack1.gif
I’m feeling really bad about killing those bulldog puppies now too.
Meh.