I am very drunk. Lady Maestro is away and it’s currently 90 degrees in town here, which is extremely unusual for this part of the world. I’d been planning on seeing a baseball game tonight (the Cuban national team is playing our local AA squad) but I just can’t deal with frying myself to a crisp for several hours. So it’s been a driving range session this morning and then many beers instead for me inside with air-conditioning, mercifully. Forgive me for any typos I am about to make.
Let’s do a little roundup of tonight’s goings-on in the world of sports:
Copa America:
- Argentina v. Venezuela – 7 PM ET: Messi and the crew is currently ahead 1-0 as I write this.
- Mexico v. Chile – 10 PM ET: the other quarterfinal matchup – my money is on Mexico here, but then again, I haven’t paid attention to a lick of this tournament because Soccer Canada runs the remedial football education program of the world, apparently.
Beisbol:
- CWS vs. CLE – live
- PIT vs. CHC – 8:15 PM
- ATL vs. NYM – 8:15 PM
- DET vs. KC – 8:15 PM
- WSH vs. SD – 10:10 PM
- MIL vs. LAD – 10:10 PM
UFC
The other cool things happening in my city tonight is UFC Fight Night! It’s the first UFC event we’ve ever had here in town, and two Canadians highlight the card- Rory MacDonald takes on Stephen Thompson in a welterweight bout. Also has Donald Cerrone vs. Patrick Cote; Steve Bosse vs. Sean O’Connell; Olivier Aubin-Mercier vs. Thibault Gouti; and Valerie Letourneau vs. Joanne Calderwood. Starts at 10:30 on FS1!
Other Sports:
US Diving is having their final Olympic quals starting at 8 PM happening over on OLN.
NASCAR has the Speediatrics 200 from Iowa Speedway, starting 8:30 on FS1. Why the fuck do people watch NASCAR on TV again?
There’s probably other shit on, I dunno. I’m too busy with beers right now to bother. Pass the bottle opener.
“He needs to suffer for my art.”
http://67.media.tumblr.com/0394d232164a41b3368fe0885f782143/tumblr_nlenwk4WjY1trw0fgo1_500.jpg
http://67.media.tumblr.com/1c20377432705291c74e66d0ce3d7025/tumblr_n8ego9FXWD1qc8jh0o4_1280.jpg
I’m gonna go live with Sunday Gravy.
I’m not trying to steal any thunder it’s just I’m gonna sleep past my regular post time.
Happy Father’s Day!
I think you mentioned it before; do you have a garden?
We will adequately hide your thunder.
http://66.media.tumblr.com/75c8f10deae905dcf1ecd2a8f781607c/tumblr_o8wnksdyFj1qcztrfo1_400.gif
http://66.media.tumblr.com/9a460f9987b7615b000544eeb7a813ae/tumblr_o8bvd9GAdQ1qm3rsfo1_540.gif
She enjoys the intimacy of her own pantry.
http://67.media.tumblr.com/69cbe1cecb63e0ef7aadda5cdbb9bcbc/tumblr_o6xl1cjGvu1tcqhjho1_1280.png
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http://67.media.tumblr.com/94fe34b4681a04fe5d3a489bae87ef45/tumblr_n0m5kvMdNN1rjdad7o1_540.jpg
Wait, wut??
http://67.media.tumblr.com/be76fa3624a9c8fc416e023ed35c2513/tumblr_o8lca4ASGs1ugjw2vo1_500.jpg
http://66.media.tumblr.com/49bc6c93b0fb0477192b91b497e06ca6/tumblr_o8gj1nPRb21r8brruo1_500.jpg
http://66.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lq72b8WG9J1r1ypheo1_500.jpg
NSFW;
h
ttp://66.media.tumblr.com/a05e5615c70d2cc4c4077024acc5eb93/tumblr_o8bayxamem1qg39ewo1_500.gif
That’s funny.
http://67.media.tumblr.com/3107023656e06888b0aabb402d3bb48d/tumblr_mybq4dkFLO1rbrhnko1_500.gif
Reform school; you’ll feel a slight pressure.
Today was cool. I spent my time with the family that I personally chose.
Now see most of your family you don’t have a choice.
You got your Ma and your Dad and they may or may not have wanted you.
This was my personal family. The ones I sought out!
There was my ex, and she’s still totally cool and one of my best friends but there were my girls!
I have the greatest daughters ever!
And there were the 2 little grand rights.
And Daughter youngest is due in about 2 weeks.
http://img14.deviantart.net/e794/i/2012/334/a/4/phoenix_final07_by_eedenartwork-d5mohzq.jpg
Stick around!
It’s worth the ride!
How dare I post a Phoenix without the Firebird Suite!
Re: the Boggs-ian question on the previous page, when we did case races in college I was good for 8-14 beers in the 1-2 hours where we did that, but that’s obviously an unsustainable pace. I think my guess for most beers in one day (NOT 24 hour window) is probably around 24, which is obviously nowhere close to 107.
I knew better than to count.
These are ROM estimates
My favorite gif ever:
Hal Roach Studios, Culver City CA
I see Covalent is floating around. How blazing hot was it in your area today? I thought about you and hoped your A/C worked.
http://66.media.tumblr.com/50c0e21f4e8b31c0b3f9f359564543aa/tumblr_o8rn0g52561rmbksvo1_400.gif
Reasons I am watching Le Mans: Takes me back to having to race the track on GT4. Also, nothing better.
http://lemansholidays.com/shop/images/Steve-McQueen-Le-Mans.jpg
Just got home from seeing Carol Burnett. Just a fantastic time. My mouth hurts from laughing. She answered questions, showed skits, and told stories about 1960s through 1980s Hollywood.
I got to ask my question:
“Ms Burnett, like many people here, I love the Went With The Wind sketch. Did you ever hear from any of the people you spoofed, and if you did what were their reactions?”
“No. They were all dead.” (Huge roar from the crowd) Then she blew me a kiss, thanked me for the question, and then told a ten minute story about Bob Mackie, Cher, and how many costumes they ran through per episode.
Fucking amazing. 83 and still sharp as a tack. If you have the chance, take a parent for their birthday, or just invent a reason. You won’t be disappointed.
Howdy folks!
I am in serious need of strong drink and herbal substances. I had my Father’s day, oldest granddaughters ballet day and my youngest Right is two weeks away from her first baby!
My current youngest granddaughter, The Wahini is a goddamn handful.
She’s smart as hell, which may be the problem but goddamn!
When we got to the restaurant for dinner after the ballet, dear sweet baby Jesus help me from the ballet .I told them we had 5 humans and a rabid badger.
They asked if we wanted a high chair and I requested a strait jacket.
She’s awesome but I just ain’t got the stamina.
http://65.media.tumblr.com/92cd23dce9740c2e5d21a86e47a3ebe5/tumblr_o8m00jbaKm1qapnb3o1_1280.jpg
It both surprises me and gladdens me that so many people are up and posting at this time of night.
http://67.media.tumblr.com/1b700d93a77ffeeda153681308ca4899/tumblr_o7yrb1xZrD1qzzk3fo1_500.gif
WOOOO SWANS !!!!!1!!
/passes out
Yeah, that was an ass-kicking..
Yay, central time for a few days!
http://65.media.tumblr.com/7fa7b5ca05569c03131eacee23ed4f77/tumblr_o8cpbfacrk1ubfgh6o1_1280.jpg
Ruh roh……
http://66.media.tumblr.com/6130de0a2072772a2ccb934527e09351/tumblr_o8v1xjlbX51ru67qro1_500.jpg
Hey, did I ever say anything dark and fucked up? I can’t remember.
To all the Dads out there, Happy Father’s Day! May your kids all buy you some sweet Steph Curry shoes. And to the rest of you, thanks for wasting our tax dollars on cleaning up your three month old corpse and throwing it a big death hole grave when you die alone in a garage because you fell changing a light bulb because you couldn’t be selfless enough to stop playing halo. All of us are SMH right now
http://66.media.tumblr.com/1f65e024fcbc21bc6beba723002326e1/tumblr_nkn5w3JOG41s2xze4o1_500.gif
Hahaha just kidding I know you guys just never had sex. Smh x 2.
Also. Why doesn’t the U.S. ever do well in the Euro Championship? They’ll win it every year when Trump is our mayor!
Phipt! I just had sex.
Oh, you meant with at least one other person in the room.
http://67.media.tumblr.com/0d7e3d760b77a80572632cc41b97ada9/tumblr_n913uksas61sjtac3o1_500.gif
No one said that. I say selfies count.
That right there highlights the difference between the phrases “take a selfie” and “give a selfie”
http://66.media.tumblr.com/49151c3d7dac95f6e0761127a8423c3f/tumblr_o8nch6zAai1ubfgh6o1_400.jpg
It’s great work if you can get it.
http://www.msn.com/en-us/sports/ncaafb/report-haden-paid-dollar24-million-for-part-time-charity-role/ar-AAhgZ6u?ocid=ansmsnsports11
http://66.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mboxnrpHhs1r2tlf9o1_500.gif
This week in WUUUT?
http://67.media.tumblr.com/4ccc805014ce78d02e9d02bb57113b58/tumblr_o8zypzq0Lh1ususy7o1_500.jpg
http://67.media.tumblr.com/4ed419b03318bf009ae14abccdd8b01a/tumblr_no7b0jgWjP1qjnhqgo1_1280.jpg
http://www.gifclub.com/Media/kermit_the_frog_lotion.gif
This is one of the greatest gifs ever.
Senor Weaselo reminded me that I never made this before.
http://116.imagebam.com/download/QL7svInQ0wEv7h399y6o2w/49059/490583880/584333.gif
Glad to be of assistance, sir.
Swannies up 32 — 15 at the start of the second half.
http://66.media.tumblr.com/e5b3fc8cf95746f1ca4332a67dbcffa7/tumblr_o4pxh6XzsT1tstv87o1_1280.jpg
US Soccer, throwing the shade.
https://twitter.com/ussoccer/status/744379642333671424
That was one goal away from tying the all-time worst loss in Mexican history.
England 8–0 Mexico
(London, England; 10 May 1961)
If you want to learn Mexican swear words, I highly recommend twitter right about now…
That was brutal.
http://67.media.tumblr.com/625e2db3bc8a8575074431552263d3ba/tumblr_o8itpymDND1ubfgh6o1_1280.jpg
I actually have fond memories of that book.
0 — 7
http://pictures.solardestinations.com/cms/chile_food.jpg
soccer is pretty fucked if you think about it
Yup.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZIn8Uhpm_Ro
Has this been posted yet?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mAUY1J8KizU
Ooooh. Game 7 is tomorrow. Who’s excited?
http://115.imagebam.com/download/hFKtlh1Vj0V74I06j0f8gg/48650/486499646/11260440_1772867729610429_859324291_n.jpg
Her son the basketball.
He smells very nice.
Abbey Lee was my favorite of the wives in Mad Max. So sassy.
Just a friendly reminder from Karlie Kloss, Miranda Kerr, and Jesse Golden to stretch and not just melt into the sofa while you’re watching El Tri get demolished.
http://105.imagebam.com/download/fZva4xwtOxcYAff6YUkvbw/47096/470954733/karliekloss_MAR-9-2016.jpg
http://116.imagebam.com/download/vM2SwqbU7xM_G_2Ia4bQGA/48651/486500379/12552405_928970860492122_1412951603_n.jpg
http://113.imagebam.com/download/T5WVShNHdUJyB1q31C4KMA/47071/470709880/jessegolden-1.jpg
Since Denmark isn’t in the UEFA Championship
http://thumbnails116.imagebam.com/48738/3523de487371926.jpg
I can assume she’s ignoring that and rooting for another team in another tournament. Namely,
http://115.imagebam.com/download/VuLhKevy6o2wx7USMy9Zug/49058/490574148/13381048_1548793732095288_1415825259_n.jpg.a2386dbbafcaf1c294da99e7bf4542d4.jpg
Since I missed it live, congrats to Belgium. They clearly had some strong inspiration. I should add that one of the other students I lived with for a while was a Belgian girl. She was swell, but alas … I’m a coward.
http://116.imagebam.com/download/zSRn86O0Jiy60I6uAiAC7Q/49029/490289765/13402752_1004993592950636_1965603736_n.jpg
So I was flipping through TV channels earlier and I came across “The Bad News Bears in Breaking Training,” a sequel to the original and awesome “Bad News Bears.”
The short section I watched showed one of the Bears talking to two incredibly hot and nubile girls. I was ogling them on screen. Then my internal anti-creepy alarm kicked in and told me: “Wait! Those hot girls are 14 years old, 16 max!” And I momentarily felt weird.
Then, I realized, this movie was made in 1977. I was 13 years old in 1977. Those two hot and nubile girls are in real life my age or probably older than me.
Now, if those actresses were born in the year 2000 and I was ogling them, I’d properly feel like a creep for looking at them a little too much. But these two are MY AGE OR OLDER.
My question is this: Is it OK to ogle an underage girl in an older movie when you know that in real life she is in fact the same age as you or older? I say YES, it is OK under those circumstances. It was the 13-year-old me who was ogling her.
And goddamit she was hot. 1977 hot. Say no more.
Kelly Leak never had to bang no underage girls, in spite of being underage himself.
You’re probably safe either way.
0 — 6
http://www.pubfoodhotelnatureadventureholidayscanaldroitwicheurope.co.uk/chilean-reaturants-droitwich.jpg
No, seriously, what the shit? How did that even go in?
So, um, this happened.
Even Captain America roots for Chile.
http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s–ZwXFKyVU–/c_scale,fl_progressive,q_80,w_800/17lerxvxgx5yojpg.jpg
http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view3/1982143/angry-panda-o.gif
http://s2.quickmeme.com/img/c4/c49bbeed46bc43bcf68e1806b1ce62af183177196a0c5e5ae7144e012f24f4ca.jpg
still v v drunk but is mexico really losing this bad
http://www.uncorkedentertainment.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/Bro-What-Happened-Key-Art.jpg
Mexico is up 2-1.
WTF are you watching?
0 — 5
http://thelatinkitchen.com/sites/default/files/styles/recipe-big/public/main/1355/reina-palta-atun-credit-eileen-smith-main.jpg
http://116.imagebam.com/download/Hbu9ED3bRCQmnlWU5MF_HA/49058/490574160/13437368_369934806463491_824616673_n.jpg
Sheesh.
Didn’t realize anyone in Chile had ever heard of The Alamo, let alone remembered it.
Banner quote nominee
0 — 4
Why?
Don’t know. Not Chilean.
Rhetorical question
http://images-cdn.9gag.com/photo/avpN63Z_700b.jpg
0 — 3
http://s.origin.forbestravelguide.com.s3.amazonaws.com/img/answer/c625f40b-4bd9-42cf-9f3a-56c15d895d35.jpg