Your “Not Tonight Denver, I’ve Got A Headache” Thursday Night NFL Open Thread

The internets are telling me that NFL viewership is down. How much? Enough to worry some wonks, that’s how much. My solution to this problem of team owners only making hundreds of millions instead of billions involves razor blades and butterflies. Now hear me out!-it goes like this. Uh…umm… Okay I’ll be honest, this is a sort of reverse-engineering thingy whereby I come up with an answer and then try to figure out a way that makes sense of that answer. The reverse-engineering analogy is weak but none of you outside JustStopDude could give a damn. TO THE GAME!

Den/SD-The Broncs are down their HC so it’s “Next Coach Up!” The fella that isn’t being held back by The Migraine Protocol is one Joe DeCamillis. He’s the Special Teams Coordinator that smirks at Wade Phillips every time they pass in the hallway and says, “I wonder why they didn’t make YOU the head guy tonight!” Speaking of coaching changes, it’s a bad sign when you come across more than one article that itemises who the interim coach of the Chargers will be come Monday. I’m guessing it won’t be the personification of failure that is the Chargers DC. Them Bolts give up 28 points and nearly 300 yds. passing on a weekly basis. That’s added up to 17 TDs so far. I guess it’s up to de Bosa to stop the 10 game-strong division losing streak that the other teams out west AFC-wise currently enjoy. In limited play last week he put together 2 sacks and 5 tackles. As far as quick starts by de’s are concerned, he’s got nothing on the Bronc’s Von Miller. The best defensive end in football (suck it, JJ Watts) has 6.5 sacks and will no doubt add to his total ce soir. It looks like Trevor Siemian backers are strutting around after qb Lynch’s play last week. That QBR of 11.7 last week against the Falcons speaks volumes about where he is in his development.

They say that the sincerest form of flattery is typing-SO TYPE!

0 0 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
551 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Brocky

comment image

Brocky

I know we exaggerate a lot on these boards, but this might be my favorite scene from any horror movie ever

Beerguyrob

comment image

Brick Meathook

I have no idea what I did last night. It’s a complete blur.

Earlier today, I took the most painful shit of my life. Ten minutes of agony, followed by a “clink” in the toilet bowl.

I looked down and there was a partially solved Rubik’s cube in the toilet.

I still have no idea what I did last night.

Trevor Semen

In other news I can’t seem to find my partially solved rubik’s cube. I was so close to finishing the damn thing too.

Trevor Semen

Also, how the fuck did you get a rubik’s cube up there? That’s just plain impressive.

Brick Meathook

I’m not sure but I might have eaten it.

Once again, it’s all a blur.

Senor Weaselo

Clearly you DIDN’T solve the Rubik’s Cube.

Mr. Ayo

Well you certainly didn’t hydrate well enough.

Unsurprised

You were probably just trying to solve the reds that last time.

Brocky

comment image

Porky Prime

Goodnight all.

comment image

WCS

Sweet Jebus, Mia Sara in that movie.

Mr. Ayo

This is the kind of comment I would expect to have a picture.

Porky Prime

comment image

Senor Weaselo

How has nobody posted Candlejack yet, I mean he
http://i1.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/000/254/candle.png

Brocky

comment image

WCS

comment image

Porky Prime

comment image

Don T

You gotta light? Or a water tank? How about a buttered pan?

Don T

comment image

Porky Prime

“GET ME PICTURES OF SPIDER-MAN!”

WCS

Truly terrifying.

Brocky

I think we’ll be seeing this one again, ie with some schadenfreude

http://66.media.tumblr.com/e027fb7813e348e8cc1ffcd6fc89f84e/tumblr_nfh9jkGVyX1spq12ao1_500.gif

Brocky

screw it, its october, time to post some “scary” gifs

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Porky Prime

I think dry humping a chair while Hilary talks could only help his numbers.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

At this point, it couldn’t hurt.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

His base would love it. They’d rationalize it HARD.

Porky Prime

DAT CHURR WAS MADE IN MURICA! S’WHY HE FUCKED IT, IT WAS MURICAN SEXY!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

THAT IS GODDAMN FUCKING FUNNY AS SHIT!

Porky Prime

Dodgers! Hey, something went right this year! Granted, a very small thing in the overall picture, but any port in a storm, right?

Don T

Even if it is baseball. Great to have you around.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Brocky

shout out to porky if you’re watching!

Brocky

comment chains are hard…

Porky Prime

I feel like Wonko the Sane now.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Glad I saw this before shutting ‘puter down and fondling myself. 😉
Good to see you, dude.

1 4 5 6