Your “Wall of Voodoo asks, ‘Is This Game On Mexican Radio, Whoa O?'” Monday Night NFL Football Open Thread

Ahhh, Mexico City! Did you know that the NFL hasn’t played here since Mahmound Abbas won a landslide victory for the presidency of the Palestinian Authority? Time certainly has flown. Believe it or not, as a Canadian growing up in-you know-I didn’t learn much about The Mexico City! Shall we unpack her? Let’s! Rumour has it that Mexico City is arguably the biggest city in Mexico! Quite some time ago William S. Burroughs taught me that if you want to murder your wife under the guise of playing “William Tell”, the best place to pull it off is right here. This lovely lady of a city has the 2nd largest fresh fish market in the world but also the 27th largest fresh elk market as well! The 1968 Olympics ushered in the tres chic black glove fashion statement. The city has a very generous immigration policy with respect to Canadians because, “they tend to keep the overall temperature down.” The GDP (Gross Dick Pic) of this metropolis and its environs relative to the country as a whole is a whopping 16%! The mayor of Mexico City can cure psoriasis by simply looking at you. Every January 11th, fireworks are stuffed up the butt of Hernando Cortez effigies. What’s with the big grudge, City of Palaces? TO THE GAME!

Hou/Oak-For the smarty-pantses among you (myself included) that thought that the Chiefs were nowhere close to being as good as their record indicated-I give you the Houston Texicans. This whisper-thin “good” 6-3 team has a minus 27 point differential. Sure, they’ve squeaked by lousy teams six times. Huzzah for them! The bad news is that every time they’ve played a good team they’ve been blown out. The wins are not convincing and the losses are disheartening. The secondary is highly ranked but hasn’t faced a wr combo the likes of Crabtree/Cooper so far. Houston can bring the heat against lesser clubs but the Raiders O-line is ranked 2nd in pressure rates (Carr has time to throw the ball) and first in adjusted sack rate (amount of time fooling around with their balls because the athletic cup doesn’t fit quite right) Looks to me that the Raiders will expose themselves to the Texicans.

There you go… HAVE AT IT, MISCHIEF-MAKERS!!!

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The Maestro

I feel like Gruden and Alex Jones are secretly good buds. Just vibes I’ve been getting recently.

WCS

BBBBBBRRRRRUUUUUUUUCCCCCCEEEEEEEE

King Hippo

refs missed it, but that was delay of game ON THE FIRST PLAY OF THE DRIVE

Senor Weaselo

About damn time RFD went back to playing Madden on 4th and Goal.

hippofant

I am confused. Why is this game not sucking?

Senor Weaselo

It’s because it’s made with real sugar, not that corn syrup bullcrap.

WCS

Gruden’s about three seconds away from taking off his shirt and head-banging on air.

Don T

It’s so Texans to get screwed over a shitty spot.

Senor Weaselo

Three touchdowns for Carr makes it a hat dance, I mean trick, right?

Sharkbait

Here comes the challenge

King Hippo

they should deny it, just because he’s an ugly, butt-chinned motherfucker

King Hippo

AND THEY DID!!!!

makeitsnowondem

Oh, hell.

JerBear50

Welcome back, Nick Nolte.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Screw this, and everything else too.
It’s (hopefully nekkid) Dolores time.

Later Taters.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

THIS ACELA, I CALL IT THE AMERICAN DREAM BECAUSE EVERYONE ON IT IS LOUD, SUCKS, AND COMPLAINS ABOUT THEIR LIVES WITHOUT NOTICING IT’S PULLING AWAY FROM THE OVERWHELMING MAJORITY OF AMERICANS

WCS

Well I’ll be damned.

King Hippo

you, me, well, most of us, prolly

...

I will never hear Jack Del Rio’s name without thinking of PFTCommenter saying his name translates to “Masterbate into the River.”

King Hippo

Brock Lobster is doing most/all of the things I criticize him for tonight, especially making his reads quickly and setting his feet before throwing.

...

We don’t call him “Brock of Gibraltar” much. I’m going to work that one in somewhere tonight.

Sharkbait

What the fuck is a vanderpump rules?

JerBear50

Sometimes for us older guys, the pills just don’t get it done anymore and we have to turn to other methods. The rules are presumably just the instruction book that comes with.

WCS

Laws at an SEC school in Nashville?

...

Any sniper action yet?

Sharkbait

Osweiller…good?

Don T

He looks good.

King Hippo

this is the least bad he’s been, so that’s something for him to feel good about!

Don T

Is it my TV or does Derek Carr sport smokey eyes?

King Hippo

and that was every living Raider alumnus still eligible to get a passport

WCS

So, not Barret Robbins.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Zombie Lyle Alzado likes this +1
(too soon?)

Col. Duke LaCross

Pretty wretched playcalling tonight.

King Hippo

two FGs inside the 2 ain’t how you win games, it’s how you get Mike Tomlin to dismissively grunt at you from his living room sofa whilst he adjusts his GIGANTIC BALLS

JerBear50

HE GOT THAT SOFA FROM COWHER AND THEY ONLY GAVE IT TO HIM BECUZ HES A BLACK!!!

Sorry, sometimes I miss Nat.

Shogun Marcus

That’s a paddling.

/remembers who got elected
Sorry, I meant that’s a cabinet position.

Don T

Mugging. Defense…

King Hippo

have to go for it here

WCS

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Brocky

I so miss the old adult swim

Senor Weaselo

Don’t call this guy.
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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“WHAT, YOU GUYS AIN’T GOT A DUMPSTER?”

– Jim Tomsula, watching that Toyota commercial.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Oakland needs to run the bubble screen.
– NCSU Coaching Staff

LemonJello

That mom was eye-fucking Drew Brees throughout that entire commercial.

Sharkbait

Or she thought he had something on his face and was about to start wiping at it between takes.

Sharkbait

Bleergh approves of this offering.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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LemonJello

Not to wake any sleeping gods, but SHANKOR seems to be sated from all of yesterday’s offerings

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Dunstan

Somebody needs to gif that Romeo Crennel master of disguise graphic — I might need to change avatars again!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Don T

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Col. Duke LaCross

There’s a good barbed-wire shot.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brocky

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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JerBear50

The fuck makes people think that everyone wants to hold their goddamn babies for?

Brocky

i’m 100% convinced its a hormonal thing.

I think it’s been scientifically proven that baby fever exists. being around pregnant women affects other women. yada yada.

JerBear50

If you insist on foisting your baby upon me, I’m gonna chuck it down the stairs like you should have done to yourself the moment your test came back positive.

King Hippo

yeah, if it’s not related to me, I have no interest, and I’m gonna be pretty weirded out if you are all geeked up to hold mine and you are NOT similarly related.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Brock’s relative competence is fucking up one of my fantasy matches

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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WCS

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Holy moly.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
ballsofsteelandfury

!

Sharkbait

Whats spanish for PI?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
theeWeeBabySeamus

There’s a high pressure system building in intensity…..in my pants.

Don T

Barometric pressure at 54 twerks

ballsofsteelandfury

Pipi

Spanky Datass
theeWeeBabySeamus

Houston needs to run the wildcat.
-NCSU Coaching Staff

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
King Hippo

Seems upward to me, ay yi yi

ballsofsteelandfury

Interesting. It was headed straight for the vagina and then made a hard right to the tits.

Don T

My house is at longitude hips.

Don T

I went to Azteca and all I got was a Fountains of Wayne show
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ox2ABdZhovQ

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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King Hippo

Boobs in leather = ART

Don T

/stroking chin
//6 AM alarm

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Don T

¡Ay Carr!
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ballsofsteelandfury

+ todo

Sharkbait

Armpunt.

King Hippo

Brock Lobster status? JELLY

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
herodotus450
herodotus450

Sill would’ve had something apathetic to say about this; I heard he quit internet commenting because he was in the running for a big government job. Involving an election college or something…

Dunstan

Goddamn it. I’ve got a really good tuna steak to sear, and now all I want to eat is tacos.

Sharkbait

Seared fish tacos?

Its a stretch I know.

LemonJello

Great minds and all that…

Dunstan

Yeah, I thought about that too. But no tortillas. Or cabbage. And my craving is for beef. I shall have to endure. And then go out for second dinner….

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
LemonJello

Make fish tacos?

JerBear50

I wanted tuna this weekend but the store was out of fresh. Had to settle for shark steaks.

Spur

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
herodotus450

What could possibly be the airport behind her left shoulder? Rapid City? Whats the airport code on that one?

ballsofsteelandfury

Yes, it’s Rapid City. Code is RAP. Alternate code is KRAP.
That is NOT a joke.

herodotus450

More like, Gutzon BorgKRAP amirite

King Hippo

oh dear Christ. Time for some Mexi-stalking, amirite??

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

So now I’m getting this shit.

Spur

What if the lady in the You Don’t Own Me commercial just sucks as a cook? Maybe the head chef thought the dish she made sucked and was letting her know.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Or else they forgot to feed the restaurant dog and he was just making sure it didn’t go hungry.

Brocky

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King Hippo

oh, you just wait until the TruthSquadron from the National Meth Association gets here!!

Brocky

i was going to say challenge accepted, then I decided not to

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...

Max Kellerman is still a thing?

Don T

That is EXACTLY what I shrieked.