Your Second Slate of NFL Games Open Thread

The Cowboys/Broncos tilt is far and away the best game available here but I might sneak in some Jets/Raiders action when no one is looking. TO THE GAMES!

Mia/LAC: The Fins finally get a game under their collective belts and I can stuff some Ajayi into my lineup. The Clips lost pg Chris Paul and it showed last week. The good news is that te Blake Griffin was signed in the off-season and continues his stand out play. Did you know that he once played basketball? I’m surprised that announcers haven’t pointed that out very often.

NYJ/Oak: The Jets get to travel all the way out to the west coast to pick up their second L of this young season when they could be doing the very same thing much closer to home and those that pretend to love them. Damn you, NFL schedule-makers! Not going to lie-I’m thinking seriously of taking a year off work and coming back where I left off. I call it “The Lynch Stratagem”.

Dal/Den: Is the Broncs run D improved enough to limit Zeke to under 100 yards? Melvin Gordon and his 3 yards a carry nods knowingly. It seems as though Dez struggles mightily against above average cb’s and that’s where Chris Harris comes in. And don’t kid yourself, the Cowboys D is not nearly as dominant as it seemed against the [spits on ground] Giants O. Denver in a squeaker?

Was/LAR: The biggest surprise last week had to be the way the Rams blew the doors off the Colts. It’s very strange to see a perennial also-ran step on the throat of another team and refuse to let them back up. Goff and Kupp impressed but the jury is still out on rb Gurley, what with that whole 19 carries for 40 yards albatross around his neck.

SF/Sea: The only way the Niners have a puncher’s chance at this one is to feed rb Hyde far more than the measly 15 times they did last week against Carolina. There’s just so much more talent wearing the green and whatever.

Get with the typing, fellas.

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herodotus450

What a selfish play, that just gives the ball back to Dallas! Should have taken a knee smh

Horatio Cornblower

BRING BACK TONY ROMO!!!!!
-Some asshole in Dallas-Ft. Worth right now, probably.

King Hippo

Two. of. the. Good Ones!!!

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hehehe…yay.

King Hippo

NO garbage time scores allowed. There are fantasy considerations.

theeWeeBabySeamus

A coupla more sacks would make tWBS very happy. I’ll even take a pick six.

King Hippo

ask and ye shall receive

Spur

Damn that Witten drop is sad

theeWeeBabySeamus

Shit, I thought his head fell off there for just a sec.

King Hippo

nah, my wishes never come true

King Hippo

Nice, Roby! Way to be a Brad!

King Hippo

this is ridiculous

Shogun Marcus

Donks know they have to block for the punter yes?

Brick Meathook

The best part of StubHub Center is leaving it
comment image

King Hippo

some nice eye candy in the forefront!

King Hippo

That false start ran 20 extra seconds off the game clock

Spur

This is just getting sloppy now

King Hippo

BLEERGH here, BLEERGH there, BLEERGH everywhere!

King Hippo

now please go back to runs, and be grateful for the bailout

King Hippo

10-27, an early childhood memory

King Hippo

See? USE that interior OL. It’s still just fine.

Horatio Cornblower

Why would you not go for it here? You’re down by three scores with less than 12 minutes to go and your D has already given up 35 points.

montythisseemsstrangetome

Pinned ’em deep!

Spur

So if Zeke never really contributed to this game, does that count towards his suspension?

King Hippo

Dez is a better DB than Aqib is a WR

montythisseemsstrangetome

Just not a fan of Seth Mac Farlane

King Hippo

ok, now my ass is a little twitchy

theeWeeBabySeamus

You have my attention, do go on…

Wakezilla

“I’ve noticed”

–Aaron Rodgers–

herodotus450

But the Semen Demon has 4 TD passes, so you got that going for you.

King Hippo

It’s the new DB in the lineup for TJ Ward (cut for iffy reasons) who blew the coverage

montythisseemsstrangetome

Jay Novacek reference!

King Hippo

God, that makes me miss Summerall.

Wakezilla

People forget that Novacek is still the all-time franchise leader in dead ex-wives

Wakezilla

Clearly didn’t know the difference of being hurt or injured, yet. SMDH

King Hippo

Mighty shitty JV lineup ya got next week, Fox.

Spur

Oh please let the Broncos go full Falcon

King Hippo

WITTEN? You gotta be fucking shitting me.

Horatio Cornblower

NO SHITTIN’ IT WAS WITTEN!!!

Shogun Marcus

Shittin Witten? Hope you’re sittin!

Spur

Come on Dallas make these Donks sweat this out.

montythisseemsstrangetome

There’s a whole quarter left. This save me from watching Dungy and Harrison! Yay lightning!

King Hippo

I usually mute them and do legal work, but it’s still scarring when I glance upwards

King Hippo

alright, teevee box, PLEAZ don’t go to cartoon re-runs in 9 minutes

theeWeeBabySeamus

You know you’d rather watch Gene and Louise than stinky ol’ football.

Shogun Marcus

Bob’s Burgers is always first casualty of fitbaw. Like king of the hill before it. But it’s not on the sked tonight.

King Hippo

NOT MAH BELOVED SHITTY DONKS

Shogun Marcus

Think you’re safe. Family Space Guy Trek is the only new…so they can shove the rest off.

King Hippo

I can’t believe they converted via run

Horatio Cornblower

I haven’t seen Sieman mess up like that since ‘There’s Something About Mary’

King Hippo

we’ve got a bleeder!

King Hippo

We pulled the same dumb shit Monday night, recall.

King Hippo

Jesus, Trevor/McCoy/everybody. Maybe a few runs?

Spur

Cowboys have the same deficit as the pats in the super bowl

King Hippo

ah will fucking cut yeeeeewwww

Smithchez

A slow developing cross pattern is EXACTLY what you want on 4th and short facing Denver’s passrush.

Horatio Cornblower

They call that one ‘The Princeton Eating Club’

King Hippo

yeah, I think Princeton Red is trying to teach somebody(ies) a lesson

Wakezilla

Rams announced 56000 people were in attendance. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

King Hippo

perhaps they meant in spirit

theeWeeBabySeamus

In the zip code?

Shogun Marcus

Everyone brought their imaginary family?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Watching on TV counts as “in attendance”, right?

montythisseemsstrangetome

You think 56k watched that game on TV?

King Hippo

pity and mercy are for the weak. KILL!!!!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It is bad that I’d like to see Mile High Stadium catch fire and everyone inside – Cowboys, Broncos, and Joe Buck included – die in flaming agony?

montythisseemsstrangetome

Yes you’re a terrible person go to confession.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Oh they don’t let me back in that booth anymore. There was some…unpleasantness. I can never go back.

King Hippo

I mean, Von Miller is a simple hipster chicken farmer who hangs out with Barack Hussein FFS!

King Hippo

0.8 now

King Hippo

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Smithchez

WAS-COM-PLETE

montythisseemsstrangetome

Broncs #94 has Chewbacca hair

King Hippo

Zeke now has 0.5 yards rushing today. PROGRESS!