Instant Hippo Thoughts – Holy Bananacakes! Edition

Didya get that looking glass I sentcha?  Cause we about to crash right through that mofo….

Week 19 started much like Week 5, with #OddWeekJaguras punching Yinzburgh in the mouth.  Much CBS Narrative was foiled.  But this time, down 28-7…Stillers fought back and made a game of it.  And what a game it was.  Full credit, despite the YUUUUUUGE deficit, the shitty home fans booing, and the nightmare matchup (I’m convinced JAX beats them 9x out of 10, regardless of location), The Ben and palz make BORT and one legged Horny Fourny earn this one.  And to their great credit – they played a masterful 4th quarter and didn’t give an inch when the pressure mounted.  Speaking of inches….LOLOLOLOLOLOL, Todd Haley.  What a fucknuts.  I’ll give Doug Marrone credit for having the balls to kick the icing 44-yard FG – in Heinz Field, in the elements – at the 1:50 mark, too.  That would have terrified me.  AND YES – the onside kick was still the correct call. I mean, there were a combined 87 fucking points scored in this game, and ONE first down means game over.  You’re supposed to play field position??

Yes, this is the best chance the P*ts have to lose, even on an even week.  Sports hypnosis, maybe?  BELIEVE it’s an odd week!

And it turned out that 45-42 was today’s normal game.  Yeah.  A pedestrian 17-zip Viking beatdown spiraled into instant 2nd half classic, with absolutely everything a football game can have.  It was fucking madness.  After Lionel Hutz matched Kai Pond’s under 2:00 FG, Minny had no business winning the football game.  Keenum doesn’t even have a big enough arm to throw a Hail Mary, FFS.  But…a crucial point – Coach Zimmer used his timeouts perfectly, managing what meager clock he had left to wring every last bit of marrow out of the bone.  So…the Vikes had time for one last desperate play, even if there was no rational way for them to do fuckall with it.  Clock management is well-important, people.  Minnesota doesn’t get their miracle without that necessary predicate.  An amazing game, hats off to the gladiators who took part.  Easily the two best squadrons in the NFL, and #3 ain’t within spittin’ distance.

Philly needs a weather assist next Sunday.  A really big one.  I’m betting on the prophecy continuing, Jaguras/Vikes for all the marbles.