I don’t know about you, but it’s been unbearably hot in Vancouver this weekend. We hit 34 degrees Celsius today, which is 93 Fahrenheit. For us, that’s too damn hot. It actually impacted beer sales at the game, because people didn’t want to sit in the sun with a rapidly warming beer.
Tonight’s sports:
- MLB:
- Cubs at Cardinals – 8:00PM | ESPN / TSN
- Futbol:
- Women’s International Champions Cup Soccer:
- Championship: NC Courage vs. Lyon – 9:00PM | ESPN2
- MLS:
- Los Angeles Galaxy vs. Orlando City SC – 9:30PM | FS1 / TSN2
- Women’s International Champions Cup Soccer:
Oh sure – it’s fine for the dogs,
but if I do it,
THE COPS GET CALLED!
Any restaurant which requires me to remove my shoes upon entering should be closed immediately. I am currently at such an establishment. I wish more ppl washed their feet daily.
Damn libtards. That’s gross.
When in a Roman restaurant, does as the ………. Roman restaurant people do.
Good God, that’s Demi Moore today?! Does she bathe in the blood of the innocent?!
THIS DEMI MOORE I CALL HER ELIZABETH BATHORY CAUSE YOU KNOW WHY.
She’s spent over (an estimated) 500k on youth related surgeries
I don’t know if this is Bruce’s roast or Edward’s therapy session.
Edward’s therapy session is making me laugh.
Fuck. Edward Norton ragging on Marvel. Long Live this Prick!
He was right about the Incredible Hulk, but there’s no way he could’ve done the Avengers movies. His ego would get in the way.
It would’ve been awesome, though.
Making fun of Wes Anderson…AWESOME!
The beauty is I’m not sure if Edward is joking or is completely serious.
fucking errors
NAWT TEH CARDINAL WAY!!!1111
Edward is on fire! Keep it up
Yes he is
And that’s the part where I turn the roast off
oh boy. The nervous comic is cussing to hide his lack of jokes.
Is it Shark Week? DId i miss it this year?
A slow start for this roast.
It’ll pick up once they get to Patrice O’Neal and Greg Giraldo
Honey and Salmon. Patrice was good.
In a fair and just world, he would have lived long enough to relentlessly abuse what Anthony Cumia has become
Shit, I miss those two guys.
The Canadian NDP laughs at your right-of-centre “left wing”.
@tom_sellecks_mustache – if you try to edit your profile, do you see a second section with avatar images? You should see a live-action Tom Selleck in the top section and the cartoon one in the lower section. Only thing is I’m not sure that regular users even *see* the lower section at all.
@brick – I only see the Bill avatar everywhere in your profile.
Here’s the engineroom of a nuclear submarine, in case you wondered what was inside one:
can you build us one for the clubhouse? Pretty please??
They’re not starting with their strongest hand. They’re limping in with a bathroom break.
Speaking of oppo research dumps.
https://twitter.com/LeslieCockburn/status/1023701334434959362
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SC6KkaqTCbs
yeah, that guy is…interesting
apparently wrote a book about “why women want to fuck Bigfoot” (essentially) but he scrubbed that link
Honestly the Big Foot Fucking is more of a plus than a minus for me.
Celebrity Suicide jokes coming early but not hitting.
It was a good joke. Shitty crowd.
It was about Robin Williams. That’s a sad subject for most.
c’mon, it’s the least he can do for subjecting the world to “Patch Adams”
I can’t imagine going to a roast and not be willing to laugh at the more horrific things than I can possibly imagine. From 9/29/01:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=13&v=j6VfCA3ZRhI
He made up for it though. On the spot, too:
Slightly NSFW
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aGA0dIz9-Wk
Best Scenes From a Hat, though.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xMkHKC8O4i8
Augh, too soon for the Too Soon Jokes?
joseph gordon levitt seems like an ok dude.
Let’s live blog this Roast.
Aw, its too late to cook a roast. Can’t we just get carryout?
Join the Instant Pot revolution!!
please do!
/Birdos 2, Osos Pequenos 1
goddamnit, 2-2
This guy?
I love this fucking guy!
I hear Motorhead, so that’s a good start
SPUR: Hey, where the hell is the roast?
ANDY REID: [muffled through a mouthful of delicious cooked meat] I don’t know.
It’s our daughter’s 18th birthday today. Feeling the melancholy associated with officially being childless; melancholy is tempered by the fact that she’ll be living with us until she’s 40.
Hope you weirdos are having a good night, presidential tweeting aside.
You liar, there’s no way you could be feeling bad about a teenager moving toward the “I can kick you out the door age.” 😀
See? It’s complicated. That’s why I drink. (That, and the crippling alcoholism.)
Congratulations man! On that day I hanged my child rearin’ cardigan and shouted FROM NOW ON NOTHING’S MAH FAULT! And life hard,* kid.
* If you need money, gimme 24-48 hours.
(assuming a Puerto Rican cardigan is a white t-shirt without the sleeves rolled up)
I believe in the mainland that garment is called the Ike Turner.
that’s fucking beautiful
I’m still living at home near 40, but its tempered by the fact that I’m taking care of the house and everyone’s agreed that if I leave the house, everything would fall to chaos inside a week.
Yep, saw that in “The Hills Have Eyes.” You folks gotta stick together.
Congrats!
Also, pics?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CkgEt6SHyfc
Her voice……. it’s almost as erotic as a women’s tennis match.
We should elect the next President Hungry Games style. Ted Cruz would be giving handjobs for food by the 1st day.
“He’s just kind of mashing it.”
You really think a Republican Senator would give handouts to people?
Handjobs for food? A republican senator would never work that hard for an honest living.
Two more previews of “Claws”, and I can confidently edit their Wikipedia page.
Adrien Brody was buff for Predators
Adrien Brody was clocking the hell out of me at the La Brea bakery one time. I have no idea why. I didn’t even recognize him until my wife pointed it out later.
Well fuck my muffin.
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/07/26/opinion/trump-re-election-2020.html
In case any of my liberal commentist friends want a scary story before bedtime.
Ha! Ovs #FakeNews and trite device. Oh how the Grey Lady has fallen! Ah—WHY IS MY FAINTING COUCH FULL OF ANTS!
I read the “left” version of this as well, and the NYT is just God-awful now, isn’t it? Seriously, Elizabeth Warren??
They have a real shitty editorial selection with the likes of Brett Stephens and Bari Weiss on it. Its like they have to have Neo-Cons to say hey “we are balance with are right leaning writers”
Trump winning is definitely a 50-50 proposition but Warren won’t be atop the ticket, Gillibrand will be because she’s a ruthless shark who has the political instinct Hillary never had.
They also won’t lose on a universal health care proposal, but the Democrats won’t run on one so whatever.
Agreed. If they lose the ’18 Election, they’ll preach a return to Normalcy and a grown up form of government. If they win the ’18 Election, they’ll fight against Trump and Senate obstruction.
Either way, the trick is to win the vote Trump got in ’16. If they go Full Democrat with Univeral Health Care and Abolish ICE, they’re going down. If they go Left-Centre with Strengthen Health Care and Fix Immigration, they can win.
Your second paragraph is dead wrong, but it’s what the Democrats will do anyway.
How else can they win if they don’t go after Independent Votes or Never Trump Republicans? Just because I don’t consider myself a Republican doesn’t mean I’m now a Liberal who believes the opposite of what I used to believe.
They need to espouse good policies and explain them in a reasonable fashion. I’m not sure exactly what that will sound like yet, in terms of exact policy term. But it’s ok to be left on things, as long as it makes sense, you explain it, and are temperamentally reasonable in contrast to Trump.
Have to engage the base and appeal to moderates. It can be done. Obama did it.
Because it’s what they tried–and was the their desired strategy–in 2016 and it failed miserably. Nearly all Republicans adore Trump, nearly all Democrats hate them, and “independents” don’t always equate to moderates.
Don’t take this the wrong way, but you are not the voter or potential voter that should be targeted by the Democrats if they want to regain and maintain power and your vote is not at all necessary to win, which means you are the exactly the voter that they will target at the expense of all others.
there were areas of the country/parts of the “old” GOP coalition (especially the suburbs, like the smaller towns and cities outside Raleigh in my home county in NC) that moved sharply to the left, and have stayed that way in local, special, midterm elections since. You want to keep them, whilst simultaneously goosing the base vote back (being better prepared for the Russian cyber bot/troll attack designed to suppress minority voting, for example, is one prong – but persuasion is still important and no voters can be taken for granted, a 2016 lesson), and getting back what’s gettable of the voters in the midwest to stupidly shifted to Herr Fuhrer.
It may not be easy to do all these things simultaneously, but you kind of have to. What has to be avoided at all costs is black and white “fuck those people” thought that cuts off one’s nose to spite one’s face. Dems can’t operate that way.
DNC after reading this comment: “We should do what we can to win the InfoWars voters.”
To me, the suburban “old” Republicans are the new version of the old “Solid South” that cracked, then flooded to the GOP. The party that supports public education, the environment, human rights/equality, and fixing the healthcare system is their natural home, even if their taxes go up a bit. Just have to break an old habit. And people are creatures of habit. Need a good communicator to make it feel like a better idea.
Then, when they join for good, they become more left. They don’t “pull the party right” at all.
Again, I’ve seen it in Wake County, NC. Remarkable transformation over the last 10 years, and it has indeed come with added racial diversity. Whites keep moving left anyway.
Honestly, I think it’s a useless exercise to try to reconcile the modern parties with their original values or assign them as conservative or liberal. The parties long stopped giving a fuck about any of their guiding principles, and most voters treat it like they’re just rooting for their team. My favorite thing is watching Republicans claim themselves as the party that freed the slaves and pull the Democrat KKK card, while pretending that nothing happened in the 1960’s. For the same reason, I enjoy hearing Dems talk up the New Deal and such while acknowledging exactly zero of their social policy until the Civil Rights Act.
the parties each essentially had conservative and liberal wings (based on geography) and only became the conservative and liberal parties after 1964 and the markers thrown down by LBJ and Goldwater, respectively.
LBJ is probably the most transformative politician in American history.
Back in my insufferable, up-my-own-ass college days, I wrote a paper that argued that LBJ’s mindless obsession with being a great president caused him to accidentally stumble into being a good one. I’d definitely throw a billion asterisks in that paper now, but it still led to an undeniably good thing happening.
Have you read the Robert Caro books? Fascinating. He is a very complex man, that LBJ.
Maybe the trick is to either get the Independents and NT GOPs to stay home. If they don’t vote for Trump, that’s helps the Dems. It doesn’t add to their total but it doesn’t add to them’s.
No offense taken. But remember, not all Republicans who don’t like Trump will stay home or write in “None of the Above”. If you give a candidate they can’t digest, they’ll go back home to Trump.
Also, tell the Democratic National Committee that I’m not their target. You vote in a Democratic Primary once in your life out and I was getting Election Ads for stuff like “Hillary: Her Life Story” and “Hillary: The Dream”. I almost voted for Trump purely out of spite.
Spite, I like. Spite, I can respect, considerably more than most reasons people voted for trump.
I believe people have internalized the idea that we’re powerless because the institutions intended to extend us power don’t actually work for us anymore. So, spite it all we have left.
Congress needs to remember they’re a check to the Presidents power. The Constitution actually intended for them to be the stronger branch (its harder for a group of 81+ people to be corrupt than it is for just one). Its just Presidents have decided to grab more power and the Congress at the time let them have it.
the problem is, and I think you are starting to see it, Redshirt, that GOP politicos fall in line. Authoritarians. They will NOT stand up to Trump, period.
It’s gotten so bad that Bill Fucking Kristol has called for Demmycrats to win Congress. If that’s not a wake-up call, I dunno what is.
Demmycrats will always be a big tent. About all we don’t welcome are racists (since like 1976) and homophobes (since Uncle Joe Biden bravely spoke out). For better or worse.
We could use a ruthless shark, but I see it being a Western ticket. Kamala Harris.
Just get one that wants a win an election and not consider it a slam drunk coronation.
My reaction to the Trump thing is that the Demmycrats need to run young-ish, conventionally attractive people. Looks more forward-looking, and people are more willing to listen to the attractive, and not find them “shrill.” Of course, they also need to be decent communicators, and be palatable to both wings of the party.
Sens. Kamala Harris (CA) and Martin Heinrich (NM) fit the bill. Progressive, but not scary boogeymen. Intelligent, attractive. Not underwear models, but that’s not what I’m talking about.
Physical appearance doesn’t matter that much. (Democrats *love* branding since it worked so well with Obama, but it’s not actually that important.) Bernie garnered a lot of support despite being a disheveled old man with minimal charisma. He just acknowledged people’s problems and offered solutions they could understand.
Bernie also never faced a kitchen sink oppo dump, since the GOP were glad for him to continue and HillyBob didn’t want to piss off his supporters any more than they already were.
The notion that Bernie would have coasted to victory, to me, is absurd.
His authenticity is a plus, though. People do want to feel listened to, that’s quite important.
The idea that opposition research would have devastated Bernie ignores that ever person left of John Kasich is considered a Maoists by anyone in the mainstream of the party. They called Obama a Gay Communist for godssake and most people knew it was bullshit.
The history of politics is littered with boomlets that faltered when they met a full-fledged opposition dump/attack. Bernie wouldn’t have lost his most committed fans, but I doubt very much he would have gotten acceptable minority turnout or support (even worse than HillyBob), the Russians still interfere, certainly some people are uncomfortable enough with the socialist label to stay home. Probably still a close loss that looks slightly different.
Bernie was a special case. He was the candidate that Democratic Socialists have been waiting for their entire lives. If Hillary didn’t run in ’16, Bernie would’ve won and it would’ve been closer. He could’ve won because he could’ve been seen as authentic. I might’ve voted for him if he plans didn’t seem too much for me to handle.
If Hillary hadn’t run, Joe Biden would have been the nominee. Things would have been more unpredictable, at least.
Good point. If Biden runs, he wins it running away. Not a walkover, but called by 10:30, assuming Trump doesn’t file a lawsuit like he usually does when he doesn’t get his way.
Uncle Joe says dumb shit. The press was always gaga to make it a true horse race, plus the Rooskies were gonna Rooskie regardless.
He would not have won it running away (his politics are worse than Hillary’s) but I think it’s possible his campaign wouldn’t have made the same idiotic mistakes that Hillary’s campaign made and he could have won WI, MI, and PA.
So he would’ve at least shown up? That’s one better than Hillary.
Dude. That was a fierce fucking thread!
I was so inspired by National Chicken wing day that I’m coming to you LIVE from a Buffalo Wild Wings on Midway in San Diego!
Actually it’s next door to my hotel.
https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/politics/ruth-bader-ginsburg-suggests-she-has-at-least-five-more-years-on-the-supreme-court/ar-BBLeEIm?ocid=spartanntp
We may have a Weekend at Bernie’s situation at the Supreme Court in a few years.
Had the Democrats had any understanding of power, Obama would have shoved her out the door back in 2010 and she would gone along with it.
At least its better than the current state of the Republican Party.
Uh, actually I consider the pure form of the Republican Party to be like a mix of The Doctor and The Master from Doctor Who, “Always try to be nice, but never fail to be kind.”
Before you put fingers to key to call for my head, please bear in mind I’m basing that off of the version of the Reagan/Bush 41 Republicans that died in the early 90s. You may not like them, but they’ll work with you to get stuff done. They may do something you find wrong, but its not because they hate people and want people to suffer; they just feel there’s a better way
When Newt’s guys took over in ’94, that’s when the Republican Party went to shit.
I only know what the Simpsons tell me, sir.
Except The Doctor’s one of them wimmin-types now which angers people because how dare the alien that can regenerate and change form into someone else turn into someone with boobs!
/But still not a ginger.
//Calling it now, the 24th (and by clock standards final) Doctor will finally be redheaded.
That’s the 21 Century.
12th Doctor: Finally decides to be himself. Not a young guy. Not a hero. Just an old, tired man. Once he’s made peace with himself…
13th Doctor: Decides to have a sex change.
I couldn’t believe she stayed with a pancreatic diagnosis. That has a 5-year survival rate of like 0.1%. I know, because my Dad had it. Tis beyond hopeless, even if you get it young. To hang on that old is a damned miracle.
The left is, has always been, and probably always will be, like herding cats. We are not authoritarian in any way, and we don’t respond well to anything that feels like being pushed around.
This has an unfortunate downside in the modern political climate, that needs an effective counter-strategery.
/also, Obama absolutely was frustrated that Ginsburg didn’t step down. He did indeed try whilst he had 60 votes, especially.
Ginsberg as a liberal icon, particular among liberal women, is going to bite all of us in the ass.
Nobody had a better record of promoting liberal women in the judiciary than Barack Obama. He should have been 100% trusted on this. But judges are quirky, and that’s lifetime tenure for you. In the past, it has bitten the right, but they have been more lockstep “do as you are told” in the recent Federalist Society-trained era.
[clears throat, kicks back]
I am told the tarp has been removed for all you Los Osos Pequenos scum who want to mock me later,
/WHERE ARE YOU, Internet Dad, monty, and Rev. Mayhem? Leavin’ a #BFIB to fight all alone ,, smh
Oh I’m here Mr. Hippo. Cubbies fans representing!
25 minutes is the word from Birdos interwebs
In WWE, we’ve lost three wrestlers today, Brian Christopher Lawler, Brickhouse Brown and Nikolai Volkoff. If Monday night doesn’t comes soon, hour one of Raw will be nothing but moments of silence and Ten Bell Salutes.
Rest in Peace, Sexay. Rest in Peace, Brown. Покойся, товарищ.
Looking forward to Hulk Hogan’s eulogy consisting entirely of how many times he beat up Volkoff
I forgot Philip Seymour Hoffman was in the Hunger Games. Dude was great in Capote.
I rant about this about once every 6-8 months, but everyone needs to see him in “Love, Liza” – that was the ultimate role of his life.
he carried Mission Impossible 3.
He was amazing in The Master but not everybody was down with the film. I loved it.
That was… WOW. Understated effective smarm is very tough to pull. Acting it well is genius shit.
I loved the barely restrained anger bubbling underneath the surface. Joaquin Phoenix was pretty fucking special too. That’s one DEDICATED drunk.
His total bastard in “Punch Drunk Love” and skeezy reporter in “Red Dragon” were dynamite. And then you see PSH as a nurse in “Magnolia” and it’s like “Nope! Not the same actor”.
he did a compulsive gambler in sommet as well, forget the name of it. Guy he played was from Canadia.
Hard Eight! Remember renting it, being so hungover I was watching it with one eye.
I saw that and Love, Liza both on IFC when I was better about watching that for cool, depressing shit.
Its hard for me to get into his movies because I can’t grasp this is the same guy that was in Twitter.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LnON-J8HHaE
He made me laugh at my grandfather’s wake. Okay, his doppelganger.
So Padre Weaselo pointed out that the deacon looked like Philip Seymour Hoffman who had died like three weeks prior, and I just started laughing. I got the dirtiest looks from Madre Weaselo and the rest of my mom’s side of the family and then they realized my dad was next to me and knew it was his fault.
Katnips Elbowgrease is way too hot to be that much of a drag.
BeetleJuice is on IFC
Anyone else waiting the Roast of Bruce Willis to start and/or death?
I am, but I’m a glutton for punishment.
I’m too uninspried to go to the car and fetch my book. Death would be a welcome respite, even this close to Greater Footy.
/tarp still on in the Loo
Good thing I had a long “life is shit” nap today, with there being rain in #BFIB-land delaying Most Glorious Sweep!
Katnips Elbowgrease inspires a riot in my pants
it’s too bad we have too many Pats fans, he seems like a solid recruit
I can imagine some high school student marching a show at a Regional Championships, whose final spot has to be right at that spot, costing his team a chance at Finals because he stopped out of position.
SVU is doing an episode where a nice guy is secretly a psychopath who preys on women.
What the hell, SVU?! I’m already seen as a non-sexual entity when it comes to women because I’m such a nice guy. Now you gotta add this to my negative column.
I think Redshirt might be me, except I’m a bit taller, and MOAR lefty.
They say Ted Bundy was a pretty nice guy.
yeah, but he had charisma that worked with the ladies. There’s your tell.
The NFL preseason equinox has ofgicially arrived:
Boy, I would love to see Twitter block Trump’s twitter. I would also love to see a drunken Emma Stone show up at my door saying “I got 30 minutes. Let’s see what you got.”
Bengals Football Camp Update: It assumed this is Dalton and Lewis’s last stand, but it looks like our Souless Pigskin Thrower will have some better weapons this year. Last year’s 1st Rd. WR is showing promise. Mixon is showing speed; that should help him in the later rounds (beat you to the punch). Unfortantely the right side of the OL can’t even block a group of blitzing butterflies, but that won’t be a problem because our 1st Rd. C can’t snap the ball properly.
Also, the newspaper is getting a sense of humor because they have a daily section called “Give Us This Day Our Daily Eifert” with daily updates of TE Tyler Eifert, who is either hurt or the PUP list to start the year.
Wait, that extension for Marvin Lewis was real?
Sadly, yes. My opinion (which was posted in the paper was) if there was no better option, than why change course.
Besides, after a 6-9-1 and 7-9 campaigns, we would get a crappy coach. If we go 9-7 and miss the playoffs or makes the playoffs and loss, we could get a better coach who wants to run in and take credit for Lewis’s players.
it’s cute that you still think Mike Brown will pay actual moneys to make a coaching change. As long as Marvin doesn’t ask for a raise, he’s good.
I’m holding out hope that Mike goes senile and his daughter takes over. Its my only hope that this moment.
Gonna get myself some of that sweet Major League cash by offering a service to players to delete all the tweets they made before being drafted or signed.
one wonders if they will stop drafting Massholes after this’un
/can’t get around drafting Texans or others from The South
Is it Fall yet?
Every time i watch the Hunger Games I can only call her Katnips Elbowgrease
Is that not her name?
Folks
Internet avatar.
Old fucker with an axe has a decent ass. Just sayin’….
I thought it was Putin at first.
Rain showers at sun-up this morninig and STILL managed to top out at 101F. Miserable goes without saying.
Good news? Rain and a high of 85F predicted tomorrow. Good weather wasted on a Monday.
I just checked into my room in San Diego and the card key holder that I was given by the front desk has an ad on the back for a weed store.
I love my home state.