Your “Where My Southpaws At?” Monday Evening Thread

(Banner image via Brawl in the Family.)

Thaaaat’s right, today is August 13th, which is International Left-Handers Day! No, I’m not joking, there’s a website and everything. It’s one of the silly holidays I actually like, being left-handed and all. Because we may have shorter lifespans, can’t use regular scissors in our dominant hand without minor strain and annoyance, and smudge the ever-loving shit out of any documents we write with our hands, in addition to ripping out the looseleaf paper in the binder it was written in, but hey, we get a day to ourselves. So, let’s indulge to take time to remember some of the left-handed throwers and kickers of the NFL. Like Steve Young, the only left-handed quarterback in the Hall of Fame! Or Michael Vick! Or Sea Bass! Or David Akers! Or Morten Andersen! The all-time points leader is a lefty, so woo! At least until Vinatieri breaks it this year since he needs 58 points to do so.

But see? They exist. I mean, there are zero lefty QBs currently in the NFL, but there are kickers. And punters, Superb Owl LII had lefty punters on both sides with Donnie Jones and Ryan Allen! Everybody seems to want a lefty punter for some reason. And Aussie Footy players. So a lefty Aussie Footy player? You’re golden.

NFL News
As tWBS alluded to last night… FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT! This one between the Jets and the Redacteds in their joint practice. Sorry, these two, there were two different fights. A link to the video here. The fight started either due to ‘Dacteds OT Morgan Moses shoving Jets CB Trumaine Johnson as the former finished off a block, or a cheap shot on Moses afterwards. Probably the latter. The two teams play on Thursday.

The Jags have suspended Jalen Ramsey and Dante Fowler for a week due to “violating team rules and conduct unbecoming of a Jaguars football player.” Fowler was involved in a fight at practice on Sunday, which was reported on by Phillip Heilman, and Ramsey took exception to it on Twitter.

On the flip side, Hue Jackson made Browns WR Antonio Callaway play most of their preseason opener against the Giants due to not telling the Browns about a citation for marijuana possession and a suspended license last week, and Callaway didn’t tell the team until the dashcam footage was released on Tuesday. In a related story, after playing 54 snaps on Thursday, Callaway was limited in practice Sunday due to a rib injury, which Jackson noted was probably suffered during the game.

The Colts released Shamarko Thomas on Saturday after he was ejected for a helmet-to-helmet hit Thursday against the Seahawks. They then signed DE Ryan Delaire.

The Christian Hackenberg Experience returns! This time, with the Eagles. He’ll be around as long as Nate Sudfeld and Joe Callahan are hurt.

Other News
A kid from Staten Island threw a complete game to send his team to the Little League World Series. If you think strikeouts in the Majors are too high (which they are), he struck out 12 out of 18 batters. This concludes the website’s Little League baseball coverage, hopefully for eternity.

What’s on tonight?
Subway Series: The make-up game: Mets (deGrom) vs. Yankees (Severino)—7E, ESPN
American Ninja Warrior: Philadelphia City Finals—8E, NBC
FIFA Women’s U-20 World Cup, Spain vs. United States—8E, FS2
NFL Films is doing a year in review of teams apparently, with tonight’s being the AFC East, in reverse standings order; Jets, Dolphins, Bills, P*ts—8E, FS1

Um, I don’t have a closing thing. Sorry, but you know what to do.