Your Lazy, Hazy Sunday Afternoon NFL Football Open Thread

Let’s get right down to business, shall we? TO THE GAMES!

Cle/Oak:

Browns fans: “Wouldn’t it be great if we could pull off two wins in a row.”

Browns 37 Missed Tackles: “I’m not sure we can do that fellas. The odds aren’t that good.”

Raiders League-low 3 Sacks: “I think if this Mayfield kid doesn’t get rushed in the pocket, maybe he can do some things.”

/can’t help but think that this one will be an ugly affair

Sea/Ari:

Here’s a silly stat-them Seahawks haven’t had a road September win in five freakin’ years. Perhaps the return of wr Baldwin will contribute to the end of the streak. Or perhaps what will tilt things for the road team is the fact that the Cards D allows opposing qb’s to complete passes at a 70%+ clip.

NO/NYG:

The fantasy play here is wr Shepard. Outside of cb Lattimore the Saints secondary is a travestylaughingstock. The cb2 spot is occupied by two nobodies that take turns getting the start, getting yanked and then getting put back in because the other sucks so badly. Plus te Engram is out so more targets to get. As of today, Eli is completing 80% of his aimed throws! (passes that aren’t intentionally ditched) I blame Saquon and his generational talent.

SF/LAC:

The Curse of The Cougar Hunter manifests itself once again! This time in the form of Jimmy G’s leg going all kablooie. Qb C.J. will need all of Matt Breida’s 5.4 yards per carry to help keep the pressure off.

Type like a million monkeys trying to write a novel.

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JustStopDude

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Oh Browns…

fleshwound_NPG

The Cleveland Browns would be 4-0 if they weren’t the Cleveland Browns.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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JustStopDude

Well…in defense of the Browns…they don’t have a lot of practice in protecting leads late in games.

litre_cola

So if this ends Earl Thomas’ career then Lev Bell has a point.

Mr. Ayo

God damn it. Fuck the SeaTruthers to death.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

He has a point anyway.

litre_cola

I do agree with you Moose.

King Hippo

Cj CreggDOWN!!!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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fleshwound_NPG

It was a good week, Cleveland.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Petronel

Kudos to the Aints’ equipment guys – the reflective old gold on their uniforms is quite nice.

yeah right

I think those are their “color rush” unis too. Best version in the business.

King Hippo

THROW IT TO NJOKU YOU TINY-HANDED ASSHOLE!!!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

2nd and 3 in the Red Zone with Marshawn Lynch in the backfield…end up settling for the field goal.

That’s My Raiders!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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litre_cola

Fuck ye then

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Take it easy pal with the anger, pal. She didn’t say she wouldn’t wear pants for France.

litre_cola

Nae bother big man.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Her point is Braveheart was a fucking terrible movie.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Doug Martin is so pointless.

Mr. Ayo

He can’t reach the sharpener.
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JustStopDude

Beef mode be hard as shit to tackle…

fleshwound_NPG

there are fat humps on twitter defending what frank reich did

enjoy going 1-4 next week!

Mr. Ayo

YOU PLAY TO WIN THE GAME!

-Some rando JV coach

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Hey so what happened?

JustStopDude

Went for it with less than a minute left. 4th and four…something like that. In their own end of the field.

fleshwound_NPG

went for it on 4th down in OT near midfield with about :30 left in OT, failed

(also, called TO to ice the kicker, kicker missed it…then made it after TO and HOU wins)

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Just love how the Raiders punter can’t kick the ball more than fifty yards unless the LOS is the fifty.

yeah right

Chargers have the ball in the goalie box.

Mr. Ayo

And a terrible free kick attempt by Rivers.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Andy Reid is a big fan of this Baker fellow because apparently he uses a lot of grease.

litre_cola

It is in his name!

litre_cola

Both of these teams in Raiders Browns are bad at catching teh football.

JustStopDude

These fucking Browns receivers….

fleshwound_NPG

Favre/Rodgers and Manning/Luck, two situations that had one generational QB lead into another…

Each situation has seen no QB win more than one ring. One doesn’t even have a Super Bowl appearance.

That’s not good on Indy and Green Bay.

Lesson: don’t hire dipshit meatheaded coaches.

(tho Mike Holmgren did get back to back SB appearances and was sorta fucked by two dynasties in DAL and SF)

Mr. Ayo

Emo Carr not dead yet.

He only went across the river.

litre_cola
fleshwound_NPG

oh yea…the browns. forgot.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Sigh. I don’t know why I’m ever surprised by this Raiders team.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Saint give a wedgie.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Petronel

Huh. Always wondered what a fortune cookie folding machine looked like.

Petronel

Baker boy runs strangely.

fleshwound_NPG

browns proving going for 2 every time is…not a bad idea!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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fleshwound_NPG

review the 2-pt, he was across

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Also Hue Jackson totally needs to challenge that call, it’s worth 2 points.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

The review is automatic.

King Hippo

SCORING PLAY PPL FORGET THAT

/even RZ guy

//he IS on a LOT of coke

Ian Scott McCormick

I’m in a shit talking battle about whether Baker is good against a guy who obviously doesn’t watch football (He doesn’t like Baker), and he’s threatened to give me the finger guns if the Raiders win. So I really need Baker to play well. Gonna be pissed off if he looks bad.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Rookie QB; never a good bet.

Ian Scott McCormick

Well my point that set him off was that he would win offensive ROY when the year is over. So I had to bet on a rookie. I still feel pretty confident that this will happen.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

AND the touthdown was scored by the guy I’m playing against in fantasy!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

When did Derek Carr become Jay Cutler?

LemonJello

As soon as he found out who the new head coach was?

Redshirt

Browns good or Raiders bad?

Spur

yes

fleshwound_NPG

all the yes

Mr. Ayo

Could the Jests beat the LOLRaiders?

Mother Puncher

Landry good. Otherwise, yes and yes and yes

fleshwound_NPG

even moar LOLRAIDERS!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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litre_cola

Afternoon! I now need to how how much it is to send a bottle of whisky to Puerto Rico. Fuck.

yeah right

Just deliver it on person.
Support the PR economy!

yeah right

We might be looking at 2 game 163s in the National League tomorrow.
C’mon Tigers, wake the fuck up!

Hard to focus on football when it’s the last day of regular season baseball.

fleshwound_NPG

yet another thing he fumbled

JustStopDude

Happy Valley White Out!!!
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fleshwound_NPG

#JoePaBlew

Petronel

Unless the demographics have changed significantly since I was there twenty years ago, it’s always pretty white out in Happy Valley.

Ian Scott McCormick

“Kids are doing blow at PSU”
What the fuck? This is still going- Oh. Oh, I get it. Nevermind.

fleshwound_NPG

Bradshaw just said Sterling Sharpe caught a TD pass

He’s long, long overdue for the old people home

JustStopDude

Are the Browns this good…or the Raiders this derp?

Mr. Ayo

#ThePauls are never losing again

fleshwound_NPG

Rally Possum undefeated?

Ian Scott McCormick

Are the Browns good enough to beat an 0-3 team? I dunno. Maybe?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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fleshwound_NPG

LOLRAIDERS again!

King Hippo

#ThePauls!!! Doing a good redux!

Viva La Tabula Raza

Saw him with Los Straitjackets at Antone’s in Austin Wednesday night, Jimmie Vaughan opened. Great Show!

King Hippo

21-play scoring drive. Field goal drive.

King Hippo

GIVE THE TOUCHED DOWN

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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King Hippo

Seriously, David Johnson?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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LemonJello

The small intestine is a marvelous thing.

fleshwound_NPG

just noticed, afc matchup on fox, nfc matchup on cbs…

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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fleshwound_NPG

beefmoe.