Your Saturday Evening NFL Prelude Open Thread

Beerguyrob

Beerguyrob

A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
Beerguyrob

The first week is over and boy-howdy am I ready for some hard drinking. I so far have registered 30 at-risk students in my program. That’s more than double last year’s first-week total, and is already close to the point where I will have to close registration because I don’t have enough room or materials for beyond 40 kids.

No risk of cool theme songs coming out of my classroom.

Also, I may have to learn Tagalog, given how many Filipinos I have in my program. Parents in the district are screaming for French immersion, but my risible French serves no useful purpose when my classroom sounds like the back alley of a Manila Jollibee.

He haunts my dreams.

So, I’m spending this evening with my wife, my dogs, and a bottle of the good scotch from last summer. FOR TOMORROW I FOOTBALL! Three hours down the road is the Seahawks home opener, and I will be there sucking every last drop of fun from my weekend, $5 at a time. Hopefully, if I can keep it between the ditches on the drive home, I have some good pictures to show you during the week.


Tomorrow’s broadcast maps:(courtesy 506sports.com)

CBS SINGLE

 Anchorage
 Fairbanks
 Honolulu

█ Tennessee @ Cleveland – Jim Nantz, Tony Romo

█ Kansas City @ Jacksonville – Ian Eagle, Dan Fouts

█ Buffalo @ NY Jets – Kevin Harlan, Rich Gannon

█ Baltimore @ Miami – Andrew Catalon, James Lofton

█ Indianapolis @ LA Chargers (LATE) – Greg Gumbel, Trent Green

Cincinnati @ Seattle (LATE) – Spero Dedes, Adam Archuleta

Really? Tennessee vs. Cleveland gets the CBS A-team? Holy hell are they already in the hole hard for the Browns to make something of themselves.

Meanwhile, the Colts would be better off starting Trent Green.

FOX EARLY

█ Washington @ Philadelphia – Kevin Burkhardt, Charles Davis

█ Atlanta @ Minnesota – Thom Brennaman, Chris Spielman

█ LA Rams @ Carolina – Chris Myers, Daryl Johnston

█  NO GAME due to blackout enforced by home team on CBS

Can’t argue with much here. Each game looks solid, and has solid announce teams.

FOX LATE

 Anchorage
 Fairbanks
 Honolulu

█ NY Giants @ Dallas – Joe Buck, Troy Aikman

█ San Francisco @ Tampa Bay – Kenny Albert, Ronde Barber

█ Detroit @ Arizona – Dick Stockton, Mark Schlereth

ARE YOU READY FOR SOME SHILLIN’?! The over/under on Troy referencing Emmitt Smith’s holdout is 7.5. The rest of these games are dogshit, but at least listening to Ronde Barber snicker every time Jameis gets hit will be worth it.


Tonight’s sports: so much college ball, I’m only going with the name-brand matchups.

  • NCAA:
    • BYU at Tennessee – 7:00PM | ESPN
      • If the Vols start 0-2, prepare for the “Peyton, find us a coach!” cries.
    • LSU at Texas – 7:30PM | ABC / TSN2
    • Buffalo at Penn State – 7:30PM | FOX
      • Didn’t Penn State buffalo the Sandusky investigation?
    • Tulane at Auburn – 7:30PM | ESPN2
    • California at Washington – 10:30PM | FS1
    • Stanford at Southern California – 10:30PM | ESPN
  • MLB:
    • Jays at Rays – 6:00PM | Sportsnet
    • Phillies at Mets – 7:00PM | FS1
    • Giants at Dodgers – 9:00PM | Sportsnet
  • CFL:
    • Stampeders vs. Eskimos – 7:00PM | TSN / ESPN+
  • International Rugby:
    • Canada vs. USA – 10:00PM | TSN

Enjoy your evening everyone. I am.

Beerguyrob
Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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ArmedandHammeredtheeWeeBabySeamusALXMACMr. AyoSenor Weaselo Recent comment authors
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ALXMAC
ALXMAC

ALXMAC
ALXMAC

ALXMAC
ALXMAC

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Senor Weaselo

One more Wonder Showzen clip before bed.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

This is the first day…

bk109
bk109

Uhm, guys, I woke up to a series of text about us getting locker room cancer incarnate… So… uhh… where the fuck can I post a complaint against reality?!

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Patience.

Senor Weaselo

Damn you, now I’m thinking of the Wonder Showzen episode.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

My pleasure.

ArmedandHammered
ArmedandHammered

We warned ya.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Never forget!

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Holy shit am I tired.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Did you miss my instructions below?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Yeah but I was just smashing my vas deferens

theeWeeBabySeamus

Say what now?

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

What

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

That’s not how you’re supposed to do it. But if it works for you, god bless.

theeWeeBabySeamus

/has had vas deferens smashed before
//never did it hizself or voluntarily

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Color me shocked.

theeWeeBabySeamus

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Also….it certainly never made me tired.
Woke me up fast.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Not what I said, but I don’t disapprove.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Go ahead and crash. Artist’s conception:

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Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

13/10.

Would boop.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Huskies tweeker game back on in 15 minutes!

Hit those pipes now folks.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

The Trump is president/ Antonio Brown is a P*triot timeline…… well, let’s ride it out, if not for spite, maybe morbid curiosity.

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Here I am, I am now on the plane, I am the passenger in Seat 1A. The senior passenger: the first on, the first off, the first down the escape chute, and the spokesman for all the passengers in front of the media.

I’m on the airplane in the background, not that guy in the foreground who’s obviously riding on a train.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Senor Weaselo

I thought Stanford was beating the ass out of USC, what happened?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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rockingdog
rockingdog

found a funny:
ME DRESSED IN A CHEERLEADER OUTFIT: I SAY WHAT’S YOU SAY UPDOG, WHAT’S
CROWD: UPDOG
ME DRESSED IN A CHEERLEADER OUTFIT: WHAT’S
CROWD: UPDOG
ME: JUST OWNING AN ENTIRE STADIUM WHAT’S UP WITH YOU

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Stupid sexy rockingdog.

JerBear50
JerBear50

https://www.facebook.com/lane.pittman/videos/10156586293401724/
They’re blaming this on Florida Man, but I’m pretty sure that’s PFTC.

JerBear50
JerBear50

Goddammit, did they change the formatting or did I just forget how to post shit?

Senor Weaselo

I would want a Cat 5 just around him, to see what happens. For science, of course.

blaxabbath

I don’t get the Arizona /Detroit game tomorrow but I think I’ll still stream the post-game show.

rockingdog
rockingdog

Anyone watching this USC-stanford game?

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Of course.

Spur
Spur

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theeWeeBabySeamus

9/10 Would play international twister.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

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yeah right

Early game.

I have no expectations.

But this is a tradition dammit.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

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Spur
Spur

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Spur
Spur

Looks like Stanford is kicking USC while they’re down. It’s a well deserved kicking

Senor Weaselo

That’s not all right all right all right for the Longhorns.

Spur
Spur

That’s game. Texas had a change and blow it.
Can LSU beat Bama?

King Hippo

neaux

King Hippo

way to have some BALLS!!

Senor Weaselo

New Texas atmosphere? Is that like smog?

Spur
Spur

Less Gunfire

Spur
Spur

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