What a long, strange trip it’s been for Antonio Brown in New England. They’ve laughed. They’ve cried. They’ve grumbled.

Yes, Antonio Brown’s lengthy tenure with Patriots has come to an abrupt and in-no-way-foreseeable end. Massholes, Junior Massholes from New Hampshire/Maine/Rhode Island and various band-wagoners will look back fondly on all the unforgettable moments that Brown provided them in the 11 days he was with the organization, from that time he showed up at practice to that one meaningless score against Miami to that other time he showed up at practice. Good times, good times.

For the decent, God-fearing portion of humanity, Brown’s time in New England will be remembered mostly for the alternately comedic and horrifying revelations about his conduct. From sexually assaulting a mural painter in his home by showing up wearing nothing but a washcloth to stiffing a charity out of $700 by not paying for a silent auction purchase to intentionally farting in a doctor’s face and then stiffing him on the bill, Brown added new dimensions to his furniture-defenestrating, helmet-obsessed, big-chest-having weirdo persona.

Now, the average New England fan had some defenses to offer for these revelations, from standard victim-shaming to “this all happened before he joined an organization with a Strong Culture of Winning”.

But then Brown allegedly sent a group text wanting one or more of his friends to “investigate” the alleged sexual assault victim and included pictures of her kids. And he included her on the group text. She (and many others) have viewed that as threatening and an attempt to intimidate her into silence. She went to the press, and they cut him.

Now, this is indeed the Rarest of Occasions, for I will offer the New England Patriots (/spits) a word of praise: it’s about time an organization took a strong stand against inappropriate use of group texts and Reply All e-mails.  NO ONE CARES IF YOU’LL BE ABLE TO MAKE IT TO JEAN’S CAKE-AND-PUNCH RETIREMENT PARTY, RENEE!

Because that’s what this is really about. Brown was no doubt told by the Patriots to shut the hell up, keep his shit quiet and play football. But he not only had to pull some backroom shit, he was stupid enough to get caught. And that is unforgivable in Patriot World. This wasn’t some moral stand by the Patriots, and anyone giving them credit for making a Tough Choice for the Integrity of the Organization can go sodomize themselves with the Tom Brady Bobblehead they keep in their underwear drawer.

Once again, Dr. Hunter S. Thompson’s words resound from the halls of history:

“In a closed society where everybody’s guilty, the only crime is getting caught. In a world of thieves, the only final sin is stupidity.”

Hell, Brown’s actions managed to do something that I didn’t think I would ever see: publicly discomfort Bill Belichick. Unsurprisingly, the press had Questions for the Dark Lord about AB. Normally, Belichick simply grumbles through non-answers until the reporters get tired or remember that he can have them destroyed with two phone calls and ten words. But this time, he stormed off after six questions. Bill Fucking Belichick, Grumblestilskin himself, was actually Bothered. And not only bothered, but thrown off enough that his Fight or Flight response finally went to Flight. To my recollection, this has never happened before- not in the face of Spygate, Ballghazi, or the dozens of angry husbands he has no doubt encountered. Belichick’s answer is always, ALWAYS to either stand his ground or be aggressive. But not now.

And for that, I thank you, Antonio Brown. America thanks you.

Once Bill had shown publicly weakness, the only options were to cut Brown or have him killed. Brown should probably count himself lucky. As should the Cincinnati Bengals, where Brown will inevitably sign next to fill in for AJ Green.

And as always, Foxborough delenda est.