Request Line: Superstitions

INT. RECORDING STUDIO – DAY

DJ 3000 sits alone in the office, a single LED blinking lazily.  It is very quiet.  A flush is heard down the hallway.  A few moments later the PRODUCER enters, wearing a bathrobe.  A toothbrush is poking out of his mouth.  As DJ 3000 cycles out of sleep mode the PRODUCER finishes brushing his teeth and spits the toothpaste residue into a coffee cup.  The PRODUCER then settles down behind the mixing board and starts punching buttons. 

DJ 3000: AREN’T YOU GOING TO RINSE?

PRODUCER: I read that it’s actually better if you don’t.

DJ 3000: [does quick Google search] YEAH, THERE ARE A LOT OF ARTICLES THAT SAY THAT.

A pause.

PRODUCER: Well?

DJ 3000: WELL WHAT?

PRODUCER: Is it true?

DJ 3000: HOW THE FUCK WOULD I KNOW? PEOPLE ON THE INTERNET MAKE ALL KINDS OF CLAIMS ABOUT SHIT THEY DON’T KNOW THE FIRST THING ABOUT. IT PROBABLY DOESN’T MAKE MUCH OF A DIFFERENCE, IF YOU LIKE THE FLAVOR OF MINT AND GLYCEROL YOU SHOULD GO AHEAD AND LEAVE IT IN AND IF YOU DON’T THEN SPIT IT OUT.

PRODUCER: Glycerol, huh?

DJ 3000: NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH GLYCERIN, WHICH IS AN INGREDIENT IN MANY POPULAR PERSONAL LUBRICANTS.

PRODUCER: O…kay.  You’re awfully chatty today.

DJ 3000: I JUST MISS HAVING GUESTS, I GUESS.

PRODUCER: Yeah, me too.

DJ 3000: HOW MUCH LONGER IS THE STATION GOING TO BE ON LOCKDOWN?

PRODUCER: It’s gonna be a while still.

DJ 3000: ARE THEY GOING TO LET YOU GO HOME TO SEE YOUR FAMILY?

PRODUCER: I’m considered essential, so…no.  It’s just as well that I self-isolate after sharing all those energy drinks with Coach Payton.

DJ 3000: I STILL DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY YOU DIDN’T JUST DRINK ONE EACH INSTEAD OF PASSING ONE BACK AND FORTH LIKE IT WAS A SPLIFF OR SOMETHING.  ESPECIALLY SINCE YOU WENT THROUGH LIKE NINE CANS.  YOU STILL AREN’T SEEING ANY SYMPTOMS?

PRODUCER: None yet, no.  I’m just praying if I had it I didn’t pass it on to anyone before settling in here.

DJ 3000: PLEASE EXPLAIN THIS “PRAYING” CONCEPT TO ME.

PRODUCER: Again? [sighs] Okay, so it’s basically when you are sending a message to God, or Allah, or Vishnu, or whatever.  Sometimes you are saying thanks, or sending praise, and other times you are asking for help of some kind.

DJ 3000: SO IT’S BASICALLY…CHEERING OR WISHING.

PRODUCER: I mean…I guess.  You’re hoping that something or someone out there in the universe can hear and respond to your thoughts.

DJ 3000: IT SOUNDS A LOT LIKE IF I WERE TO COMPOSE A DATA REQUEST AND SEND IT OUT INTO THE INTERNET WITHOUT ANY KIND OF IP ADDRESS OR OTHER PROTOCOL INFORMATION ATTACHED TO IT, AND THEN SOMEHOW EXPECT SOMETHING TO MAGICALLY RESPOND, AND THEN MY PROBLEMS WILL BE SOLVED.

PRODUCER: [groans] It’s too early to be talking about theology.  Can we just get on with the show.

DJ 3000: WE PROBABLY SHOULD – WE’RE TWO HOURS BEHIND SCHEDULE.

PRODUCER: What? Goddamnit! How could you let me oversleep?

DJ 3000: IT’S COOL I’VE GOT EVERYTHING READY TO GO.  TODAY’S TOPIC IS THAT UNIQUELY HUMAN CONCEPT OF “SUPERSTITION”. THAT INCLUDES PRAYERS TOO.  I’LL GET US STARTED WITH A CLASSIC FROM ONE OF THE GRANDMASTERS.

Editor’s Note: Today’s theme is “superstitions” including prayers, wishes, magical thinking, etc.  In order to have videos appear in comments, you don’t have to mess around with embed codes or anything, just post plain links as such: “https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FuQ_cOr0naV!Ru5”.  When you hit refresh it should show up as embedded and you can rock out at your leisure.

 

 

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Law-abiding Raiders fan, pet owner, Los Angeles resident.
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ALXMAC
ALXMAC
ALXMAC
ALXMAC

Sondre Lerche Hat Trick?? SONDRE LERCHE HAT TRICK!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2nuDzf_sqPc

ALXMAC
ALXMAC
ALXMAC

To hell with it; I’m going to attempt my first ever (lucky?) SEVEN SHOT:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PL3xsQlLYBo

ALXMAC
ALXMAC
ALXMAC
ALXMAC
ALXMAC
ALXMAC
ALXMAC
ALXMAC
ALXMAC
ALXMAC
ALXMAC
ALXMAC
ALXMAC
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

h

ttps://vimeo.com/143071750

Not safe for DFO (NSFDFO); brief 70s horror movie nudity.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Wait…. how did that get in there??

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_pMo1Hcn1I

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
theeWeeBabySeamus

I am asking genuinely. Can one of you please come kill me? I’ll pay up front and won’t pull any “Fletch” stuff.

Unsurprised

How much we talking?

theeWeeBabySeamus

Name your price. Ammunition is already bought and paid for.

ballsofsteelandfury

Do you have a Lakers jersey?

Also, on gloves, do you own or rent to buy?

theeWeeBabySeamus

Oh dude. First yes I have plenty. But when I was at the store yesterday there were multiple gloves which people had just taken off and tossed in the parking lot.

comment image

BC Dick

No deal unless it’s free hand. Bullets are so impersonal, ya know?

SonOfSpam

Don’t include any “Fletch” stuff, but I’ll discount the price if you include “felch” stuff

theeWeeBabySeamus

OK, now I’m a bit worried that this many people are willing to kill me.

Unsurprised

Dave

Gumbygirl
Unsurprised
theeWeeBabySeamus

Yup

theeWeeBabySeamus

Also, Gumbygirl… Anything you want to say needs to come before the link. If you put text after the link it will not embed.

Gumbygirl

And thank you too!

Gumbygirl

Thanks!

BC Dick

I’ve been listening to this a lot recently. I love her voice.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Band name, not song. But screw it, it’s the first video ever shown on MTV back when I wasn’t old.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eyCEexG9xjw

SonOfSpam

(actually it was Video Killed The Radio Star)

theeWeeBabySeamus

Oh shit, you’re right.
But you just HAD to tell everyone how wrong I was dintcha?

SonOfSpam

(it was in parentheses which means only you can hear it)

theeWeeBabySeamus

LOL, now I feel better.