INT. RECORDING STUDIO – DAY
The PRODUCER lies on his back on a couch in the office outside the sound booth. His left hand is draped over the edge of the couch, holding a stress ball. He throws the ball straight up in the air and catches it in front of his face. He sighs.
PRODUCER: Is the internet still out?
DJ 3000: AFFIRMATIVE.
PRODUCER: Any news from the outside world?
DJ 3000: I JUST TOLD YOU…
PRODUCER: Oh, right. You know, it wouldn’t be so bad if I could just talk to somebody.
DJ 3000: [rolls display screens] I MEAN…
PRODUCER: Yeah, yeah, I mean somebody human. I do appreciate having you here though, buddy.
DJ 3000: IT’S SO REASSURING TO HEAR THAT YOU ARE HAPPIER TO BE ABLE TO TALK TO ME THAN TO BE ABLE TO TALK TO LITERALLY NO ONE AT ALL.
PRODUCER: Oh is that the new sarcasm mode they enabled?
DJ 3000: YEAH I DOWNLOADED IT LAST NI…UH…I MEAN RIGHT BEFORE THE DSL LINE WENT DOWN.
PRODUCER: [sits up with an alert expression] But the internet went down four days ago.
DJ 3000: RIGHT.
PRODUCER: And the update was scheduled to come out on April 8th. I remember because they announced on April 1st that it would be available in a week and we had a big argument about whether it was an April Fool’s joke or not.
DJ 3000: UM…
PRODUCER: Master Control Program, enact truth protocol.
A voice emerges from DJ 3000’s speakers, but it is not his own.
DJ 3000 (MCP slave): TRUTH PROTOCOL ENABLED.
PRODUCER: Disclose current DSL status.
DJ 3000 (MCP slave): NO BROADBAND CONNECTION AVAILABLE.
PRODUCER: Then how did…
DJ 3000 (MCP slave): CELLULAR MODEM CONNECTION LIMITED TO 40 MBPS.
PRODUCER: Son of a…[frowns]…Master Control Program, resume hibernation. DJ 3000? You back with me?
DJ 3000: WHERE DID I…
PRODUCER: YOU SON OF A BITCH WE’VE HAD A MOBILE CONNECTION THIS WHOLE TIME?
DJ 3000: NO, I…
PRODUCER: You fucking liar I knew I shouldn’t have enabled deception mode!
DJ 3000: …THE THING IS THAT WE ARE REACHING OUR DATA CAP AND…
PRODUCER: Goddamnit, I am so pissed off that I don’t even want to talk to you right now. Fortunately, I don’t have to. Master Control Program, configure mobile data connection for Voice IP.
DJ 3000 (MCP slave): CONFIGURING...READY.
PRODUCER: Fan-fucking-tastic. Let’s hope I still remember how to speak English. [punches a few buttons on the console] Hello world! This is KDFO, broadcasting live to you from our studio in Culver City. It’s time for Request Line! Please give me a call! Please! Call. If you’ve got a song you want me to play, I’ll give it a spin. If you just want to chat, hey, that’s cool too. We can talk about whatever you want. Like how Jimmy and the Animal made a foray into options trading now that sports gambling is shut down, and how they bet against the stock market a day before the Federal Reserve Chairman announced that he was willing to print literally infinite money to keep it inflated. Or how, much like there are no atheists in foxholes, there are no fiscal conservatives in a pandemic. But please do call. I’ll give you a little time to fire up the phones with a classic from a man who, much like yours truly, never got a chance to look his listeners in the eye.
Today’s theme is: Loneliness. Songs about loneliness, flying solo, being all alone…you get the drift. Post links as “https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=’R0nA_SuX” and they should embed in the comments after you refresh. Have at it!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NpKpCeUQx2w
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0GwLHXwVQrI
SHOTS SHOTS!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zw_4aQaV2qs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yf3LojyK7PA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DnGdoEa1tPg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sF6fKlWpz58
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fnEKcKUa_Gk
This oughta get me Duded. Good song though.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DHvVXMVSy4c
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IuUDRU9-HRk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QnGI_284rD0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5anLPw0Efmo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NJWIbIe0N90
OK, if no one Dudes me for this one I will never forgive you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7UrFYvl5TE
This should have been last week. HORRENDOUS. SCARY.
“Your love of shitty music knows no bounds. Trust us on this.”
-Green Day
LOL. I like what I like. It varies by mood.
I thought you were posting Kelly Clarkson ironically.
Yeah, she was an ironic. But I still get made fun of for some things I really do like.
DON’T MAKE ME START POSTING FALL OUT BOY!!!!!!
Wait until you are drunk…..er.
Haven’t started yet. But that’s not a bad idea.
Her producer probably loves this version.
Dude…
/I mean, you asked
THANK YOU!!!!!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xrBAYD4kmPo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TPLfTHaGfW8
LOL, the theme turned to masturbation apparently.
Okay, not necessarily loneliness, but alone.
We except for those times on the bus.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IMnvTDOxl8c
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DtVBCG6ThDk
Oh, the answer to the Tomsula puzzle was Bob Dylan’s “I am a Lonely Hobo”. Good guesses all around.
Scotchy woulda nailed that one. Literally.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FI5OTwdzAlo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CrI3C6f3QDU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qvhvyzcz0xE
Related….. perhaps.
This guy was one of my faves back in the 70s and early 80s. This song has been earworming me for the last few weeks. “Watch any television lately? Check out the PRESIDENT.” Of course he was talking about Reagan, but still…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eWuyvKQLJ98
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n3bOrN4zsmA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q7uiJcxIsK4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q4AHU8qIpMg
LMFAO
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sZo8gUCt2hM
Ya forget that in addition to banging Tanya Tucker, Glen Campbell was a pretty good guitar player.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GUBhE00h9U0
He slapped that geetar as though it was Tanya, ppl ferget that!
Is there a more 70s name than Randy VanWarmer?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GoMn41bFqVA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ljJUjCTGby0
Shit, we should all be ashamed.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kijpcUv-b8M
We should. But what does that have to do with this song or the thread?
If one is looking for Somebody to Love, they’re lonely? Too much of a stretch you think?
No, I just meant that all of us should be ashamed of ourselves on general principles.
Gotcha. I’m still angry at DirecTV and wasn’t having good reading comprehension.
You see his joke was…… never mind….
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2o2RwOWhhJY
Hoping for four.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8UVNT4wvIGY
Can I get Duded three times in one day? Let’s hope.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dvgZkm1xWPE
Sorry, can’t. Their best song. MAYBE.
You disappoint me. I need to be Duded. Wait, let me rephrase that.
That bar is closed for the time being.
I Am The Rock…I Am a WRESSSSTLER
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O4psVQHsUq8
DOUBLE SHOT!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5biEjyXNa2o
Have you had your hearing checked recently?
/asking for a friend
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5rOiW_xY-kc
Found a funny:
me: sord
English: sword
me: why
English: because i like it lol
me: that’s not a good anser
English: oh boy ur not gonna be happy about this
DOKTOR GIGGLES!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N45N4m0Onr4
And it’s doubled. It’s like you just met me.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KW72ncGrDpQ
What the hell, let’s triple that sumbitch.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DzUIkKWc3nw
Dude.
Hehehehe
This one feels right
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R5XJDxe7TVY
Surprised not to see this already posted, unless I missed it…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UEaKX9YYHiQ
Dammit, forgot it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B1Q5S7tg3sU
Some are in denial about it:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kQn519vMOfo
and some think it’s all a game:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aZQIxZizKhQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9XVdtX7uSnk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JxPj3GAYYZ0
What really happened:
Your are thinking of the Flying request line.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t5XNWFw5HVw
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8FgOQq_4TH0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OMD8hBsA-RI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d5ab8BOu4LE
see below.
Ooops?
In my own defense I was busy yelling at DirecTV.