INT. RECORDING STUDIO – DAY
The PRODUCER lies on his back on a couch in the office outside the sound booth. His left hand is draped over the edge of the couch, holding a stress ball. He throws the ball straight up in the air and catches it in front of his face. He sighs.
PRODUCER: Is the internet still out?
DJ 3000: AFFIRMATIVE.
PRODUCER: Any news from the outside world?
DJ 3000: I JUST TOLD YOU…
PRODUCER: Oh, right. You know, it wouldn’t be so bad if I could just talk to somebody.
DJ 3000: [rolls display screens] I MEAN…
PRODUCER: Yeah, yeah, I mean somebody human. I do appreciate having you here though, buddy.
DJ 3000: IT’S SO REASSURING TO HEAR THAT YOU ARE HAPPIER TO BE ABLE TO TALK TO ME THAN TO BE ABLE TO TALK TO LITERALLY NO ONE AT ALL.
PRODUCER: Oh is that the new sarcasm mode they enabled?
DJ 3000: YEAH I DOWNLOADED IT LAST NI…UH…I MEAN RIGHT BEFORE THE DSL LINE WENT DOWN.
PRODUCER: [sits up with an alert expression] But the internet went down four days ago.
DJ 3000: RIGHT.
PRODUCER: And the update was scheduled to come out on April 8th. I remember because they announced on April 1st that it would be available in a week and we had a big argument about whether it was an April Fool’s joke or not.
DJ 3000: UM…
PRODUCER: Master Control Program, enact truth protocol.
A voice emerges from DJ 3000’s speakers, but it is not his own.
DJ 3000 (MCP slave): TRUTH PROTOCOL ENABLED.
PRODUCER: Disclose current DSL status.
DJ 3000 (MCP slave): NO BROADBAND CONNECTION AVAILABLE.
PRODUCER: Then how did…
DJ 3000 (MCP slave): CELLULAR MODEM CONNECTION LIMITED TO 40 MBPS.
PRODUCER: Son of a…[frowns]…Master Control Program, resume hibernation. DJ 3000? You back with me?
DJ 3000: WHERE DID I…
PRODUCER: YOU SON OF A BITCH WE’VE HAD A MOBILE CONNECTION THIS WHOLE TIME?
DJ 3000: NO, I…
PRODUCER: You fucking liar I knew I shouldn’t have enabled deception mode!
DJ 3000: …THE THING IS THAT WE ARE REACHING OUR DATA CAP AND…
PRODUCER: Goddamnit, I am so pissed off that I don’t even want to talk to you right now. Fortunately, I don’t have to. Master Control Program, configure mobile data connection for Voice IP.
DJ 3000 (MCP slave): CONFIGURING...READY.
PRODUCER: Fan-fucking-tastic. Let’s hope I still remember how to speak English. [punches a few buttons on the console] Hello world! This is KDFO, broadcasting live to you from our studio in Culver City. It’s time for Request Line! Please give me a call! Please! Call. If you’ve got a song you want me to play, I’ll give it a spin. If you just want to chat, hey, that’s cool too. We can talk about whatever you want. Like how Jimmy and the Animal made a foray into options trading now that sports gambling is shut down, and how they bet against the stock market a day before the Federal Reserve Chairman announced that he was willing to print literally infinite money to keep it inflated. Or how, much like there are no atheists in foxholes, there are no fiscal conservatives in a pandemic. But please do call. I’ll give you a little time to fire up the phones with a classic from a man who, much like yours truly, never got a chance to look his listeners in the eye.
Today’s theme is: Loneliness. Songs about loneliness, flying solo, being all alone…you get the drift. Post links as “https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=’R0nA_SuX” and they should embed in the comments after you refresh. Have at it!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_I_uLwq3iwI
Fuck it, I’m going deep (cuts)!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yolhf-14ECk
I’m extremely unhappy with DirecTV. The system tried to update itself today and now has gotten stuck and won’t do shit. I called tech support after trying to reboot the system several times to no avail. They told me they couldn’t fix it but they’d arrange to have someone come out… In a week or so. First, you’re not sending anyone in my house. And even if I allowed that, a fucking week or so? Wow, and I thought CenturyLink was bad.
And no Jeopardy now. I miss my TeeVee box already. At least there’s no sprots to miss.
Looks like all the books I meant to read over the past few years will now come in handy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Y2icHOgC5U
How much does it cost to cut the cord?
Careful when you divorce those assholes. They will fucking rip you off. Hopefully you are not in the middle of the “contract.”
Two from JT
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I9zEHFynDsE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sXEKnABnHe4
Last one for me
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ul-cZyuYq4
I fucking loved this guy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G-ZDKirjQgM
Excellent pick!
Man that guy had an incredible voice. Until John Lennon came ’round.
https://www.suspectpress.com/2017/07/12/at-home-with-a-ghost-watching-harry-nilssons-voice-die/
I was in 6th grade, he was in 7th. His name was Kevin. When he dumped me for a girl with boobs, I cried all summer to this song.
unexpected High Fidelity
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yaHEfJApEVM
If it’s in the first line can we count it?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HuS5NuXRb5Y
Some dickweed did a whole concert five years ago!
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLl0kPx2XyetcO5kRbk88embZktjfjIBf8
I don’t care what Trump said at the press conference…you have talent!
As someone who has sat through MANY violin/string performances, I can say without hesitation that you are far better than middle school kids (non-Asian division).
Plus, you’re a better person than Charlie Daniels.
Old school
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RrJ7DQojzIY
15 year old me heard this song SO MANY TIMES
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k9e157Ner90
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-h3asvQDzVs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fZciNthNnDA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X8UR2TFUp8w
Finally! Something Derek Carr can identify.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ceiscSJCJgI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JH398xAYpZA
Sound is not great but the video is hilarious to me.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vZZngTkp54I
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TPaG1X-mMv0
“GODDAMNIT!” – Jim Tomsula, making a scene in the public library upon discovering his song request isn’t available.
…BUT WHAT WAS HE TRYING TO REQUEST?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CUcP6Cd4jBo
This?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lebYwU6YhYQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L1R5ELgJPGw
This should be our quarantine song:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yvDB_58ppNA
Can I “Dude” myself?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w6Q3mHyzn78
Allow me:
“Dude.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4WXYjm74WFI
Just one more country song, real country music
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bsRNCvHXHHU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7m7njvwB-Ks
4 1/2 more than I need
Twofer comin (cummin? yeah cummin)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YIHMPc6ZCuI
And part deux
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UofYl3dataU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OYjZK_6i37M
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VHhND-BkWdk
Old lady panties gettin dampish now
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ql4IiP__5ck
Can’t believe I didn’t go directly there.
Dude.
For those of us who enjoy a little solitude:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FWwOEie7Eh0
Before I refresh Request Line, I like to play a little game. I assume the worst. What’s the worst reason they could possibly have for…”
Oh, wait, no, that’s when I’m engaged in medieval political intrigues. With Request Line, it’s “what song are they about to play?” I was nowhere close on this one. I thought it was going to be Thorogood, which I see has been selected below already.
R. I. to the fucking P.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gn2MwHGbP1A
Yeah, could do a whole buncha his stuff. Trump killed him never forget.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KoLc_6BmyTc
Dude.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lpzqQst-Sg8
Nice!!!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_426RiwST8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Cw1ng75KP0
Dude
Finally. It’s been weeks since you Duded me.
80s Heart deserves all the dudes
80s Heart GOT all the dudes. At least all the ones they wanted.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=djU4Lq_5EaM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xuZA6qiJVfU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f3vnmV6pPKI
Nice. Saw them a few weeks before the world shut down. OLD!!!
So you have seen….. America.
I like Lonely People better than Ruthless People.
Dunno, DeVito’s pretty funny.
Yeah, but he’s so ruthless.
AS ADVERTISED.
Still have no idea what the video’s about
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SVOuYquXuuc
Pretty sure it’s a Matrix Prequel.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fm4mcCjXW4k
Was just about to post that. I especially love the man-perm and open shirt with dangling necklace. The 70s were a weird time.
Doublish shot
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nYVDN27CrOo
Triplish shot
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHgY53QXTyA
Joining late today, had to scroll down to make sure someone had posted this one before I did..
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lk2ltoEZPFM
Obligatory:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iN9CjAfo5n0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UsdGgRL1xHc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XiMineG1w3U
Double shot!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1P17ct4e5OE
Best goddam Ritchie Blackmore song — noice!
*adjusts glasses*
Except it was written by Russ Ballard and originally recorded by him in 1976, and then recorded by Illinois band Head East in 1978, and subsequently by Rainbow in 1979.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=si0C2ebrdIQ
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Since_You_Been_Gone
Don’t rush things, use your head. There’s going to be some GREAT music available for this topic.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tCzzd3BwLAc
[runs off to youtube to line up DOUBLE SHOT]
“Rikki, you’re not listening…”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rEf85cCQY3M
I feel like this fits:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vxVlN-LzIks
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JAG2unCknzs
It’s gonna be a DOUBLE SHOT heavy Request Line for me today.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GV__2dftHmQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FG1NrQYXjLU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d5ab8BOu4LE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZaPTELylZ1s
I love it when Sting just yells the chorus over and over 75 times.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MX6MvV8cbh8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6gluNoLVKiQ
DOUBLE SHOT!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VtXl8xAPAtA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C5TaeDhPUQQ
Which often leads to this.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=69fPof-ZTnU