Your “Please-For The Love of Whatever-Please Mute Your Devices” Sunday Night Football Open Thread

Welp, let’s get this over with. There’s nothing to be said that hasn’t already been uttered over and over again.

To The Game!

Bucs/Pats:

-I guess the singular question for New England is whether cautious and underwhelming rook qb Macaroon Jones can find anyone in the secondary on a consistent basis.

-As you know, Bucs cb’s are fussing with injuries. Davis is uncertain, Murphy-Bunting is on I.R. and Jamal Dean is out for this one. And let me tell you, Richard Sherman isn’t walking through the damn door anytime… Uh, what?

-So yeah, Richard Sherman is walking through that door and apparently starting as well according to a few sites. It’s funny in that I heard Sherm himself say on the radio that he needed at least a week to get into shape and up to speed. Huh.

-Of course if you’re PPR’ing in a league it’s a full go for Jacobi “No TD’s” Meyers. He just might end up with 18 targets if the game script has the Pats falling behind early. Do they have anyone that can go long? No one comes to mind.

-Let’s not all lose sight of the bigger picture here-the Pats could be sitting at 1-3 later tonight.

Guh. I spent more time on this than I wanted to. (it wasn’t very much time anyway) As Belichick would say, “Do Your Job”, in the comments.

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Horatio Cornblower

I was thinking Brady was going to be upset that Cris was so clearly in love with Mac Jones, but turns out Cris is LDS, so he’s just living the prophecy.

blaxabbath

Very good. Very good joke.

Horatio Cornblower

I’d like to thank the Academy, and also ‘Big Love’ for giving me the inspiration to make this horrible comment.

blaxabbath

I think it’s a shame it isn’t PC to discuss Mormons. They’re wonderful people with a fascinating community but, given you agree with the premise as told by Brigham Young or the like, I’ve found a lot of consistency in their practices. But not being a religion man myself, I respect the relative consistency greatly.

But that’s the normal ones. They got some of the weirdest weirdos of any group.

rockingdog

Update;

OCG is finishing his drink and signing out.
Oh well, he was Rocking!
Gonna try to get 1 more quote from him…

rockingdog

LoL
“When is he gonna start shaving?”

Sharkbait

Gonna need a YUUUUUGE day from Waller tomorrow to come back and win my matchup

rockingdog

Update;

Now like 20 ppl are here.
Bartender has to go to work and serve them all.
Shoot. Oh well, we had some laughs.

Still have old Canadian guy aka OCG

Last edited 3 years ago by rockingdog
rockingdog

Still rooting for Fournette and Mike Evans to score some TD’s

Anthony In TX

I appreciate Collinsworth earlier saying there’s no way the Bucs can run the ball as Fournette is sitting on 77 yards with nearly 20 minutes to go.

blaxabbath

Yeah but those yards were BEFORE.

Last edited 3 years ago by blaxabbath
rockingdog

And then the rain stopped…

Mr. Ayo

And lo, Mike Evans was still ignored.

Horatio Cornblower

Just got a sweet 9 yards!

Mr. Ayo

I need a lovely 10 yards.

Mr. Ayo

I fucking love Fantasy Football!

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Mr. Ayo

OMFG. THROW. IT. TO. EVANS.

JUST ONCE.

Mr. Ayo

NUKE TAMPA BAY.

AND NEW ENGLAND, JUST TO BE SURE.

JFC@!!!!

Horatio Cornblower

The refs must be so confused. Do I make the call for Brady or the Patriots? SOMEBODY HELP ME!!

Col. Duke LaCross

Nice.

rockingdog

Update;

The bartender loves that truck commercial with the cat 🐈

Sharkbait

I miss bars.

Brick Meathook

I just ordered delivery from Zankou Chicken.

I love L.A.

Sharkbait

That sound is JJ Taylor getting banished to the shadow realm.

Brocky

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rockingdog

She’s Rocking!

Anthony In TX

I feel like “really drunk rockingdog” is going to be a wholly different experience from “really drunk jjfozz”

No more or less entertaining, of course.

rockingdog

LoL
Old Canadian guy is Rocking!

“Tony Dungy scares me. He looks like a skeleton.”

Sharkbait

Nosferatu is right there
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Mr. Ayo

El Trafico ends in gridlock. News at 11.

Brick Meathook

I gotta admit I don’t pay close attention, but I thought Dak Prescott got killed last season.

blaxabbath

These guys don’t take PEDs and come back freakishly fast and with more endurance than before their injury.

Mr. Ayo

If I could go back in time I would definitely kill Malcolm Butler.

Stupid highlight needs to burn in hell.

WCS

Maybe instead of murder, just kidnap Darrell Bevell for the duration of that Superb Owl.

Mr. Ayo

Woah, woah, woah. I’m not murdering him. He’s just dying. At a very young age.

Sharkbait

Malcolm Butler won me $700 on that pick.

Mr. Ayo

I’d pay you double to go back in time and kill baby Butler.

Horatio Cornblower

That’s good hate!

blaxabbath

The question of DB is: “How do you not simply put it in your star’s hands?”

I think it’s because he’s too short for the NFL.

But I’d still have handed it off.

WCS

“Matt Patricia had success in Detroit” is the same as “Ford did sell some Edsels.”

Horatio Cornblower

Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, what did you think of the play?

Doktor Zymm

I don’t think I can handle the second half. I am gonna go read about the 1932 Emu War instead

Brocky

They would have won if they had alpacas

Mr. Ayo

Is Brady throwing this game?

He has his Superb Owl w/o the P*ts, and can repay them with a meaningless win tonight.

rockingdog

LoL
“It’s 7 to 3. What is this Hockey?”

Sharkbait

Closecomment image

rockingdog

“Time to miss another field goal!”

Fronkenshteen

Looks like Godwin is gonna be the odd man out tonight. Dammit.

Gatoraids

why hast tho forsaken godwin

Fronkenshteen

Or I could be immediately and completely wrong.

ThePirateSloth

I’m relatively sober and willingly listening to this game.

What in the entire fuck is wrong with me?

herodotus450

Brady getting more air time during the commercials than the game it seems.

Fronkenshteen

I wish there was an alternate broadcast with Kevin Hart and Snoop. Their Olympic wrap-ups were some funny shit.

Gatoraids

Nickelodeon at night coverage would good

Gatoraids

Belichicks instructed the grounds crew to draw all the lines on the field with flour to weaken Brady

Doktor Zymm

And he has salted the visitor’s bench with iodized salt!

rockingdog

Update;

He thinks this is the game where Brady suffers a season ending and career ending injury.
“Poetic Justice”

Sharkbait

Drew Bledsoe puts down the Brady Voodoo doll

Doktor Zymm

Trix!

The Maestro

Evening, you fine folks. I am only just now getting home from a weekend away in Ontario cottage country… and I did not expect to feel such strong feelings upon immediately tuning into the game just now.

This is all still so goddamn weird.

Horatio Cornblower

New England’s strategy of “pick on the guy who hasn’t played since racking up 5 charges while trying to break into his in-law’s house” seems to be paying dividends.

rockingdog

Update;

Old, like 70, short Canadian guy comes in and sits two stools down from me.
Downs a shot of whisky and is sippin a beer 🍺
Is a regular. Knew a guy who passed away recently.
Starts spitting truth…
“Looks like Brady is missing gronk”
“Alright, let’s miss another field goal!”

It’s Rocking!

rockingdog

LoL
He’s cheering for both teams to loose
Aka the meteor situation

Doktor Zymm

HE IS ONE OF US!

Doktor Zymm

So, this is apparently a thingcomment image

Sharkbait

Man Sack: for when Truck Nuts aren’t enough

ThePirateSloth

Xmas shopping done early!

Mr. Ayo

I just need 2 more points from Evans.

Get your shit together Brady!

Horatio Cornblower

I’m playing against Brady, but with Evans, so I will second your motion.

litre_cola

I hate Al and Cris more than any announcing tandem in any sport.

Gatoraids

should have an espn2 of the damned of this with Buck and Aikman god help us

Anthony In TX

What do you think it would take for the Krafts to fire Belichick? 5 losing seasons in a row? 10? A racism “incident?” Murder? Anything at all?

litre_cola

Nope, nothing. His ego would not allow him to be fired.

Sharkbait

He could kill a hooker and the Krafts would help him hide the body.

Mr. Ayo

Only after chastising him for ruining an “opportunity”

Anthony In TX

I wouldn’t be surprised if ol’ Bob has done the same in his time…

Gatoraids

if hes against the next we need a new stadium extortion

rockingdog

LoL
Mac Jones throws a TD pass before Brady does!!!
Cats and Dogs, we gotttaaa Game!
That’s Rockinggggg! 💯

Doktor Zymm

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White Mac-down

Anthony In TX

The name “McCorkle” does bring to mind limp noodles…

Mr. Ayo

McCorkle >>> Brady

litre_cola

This game is trash.

Sharkbait

Janay Rice apologizes for her role in the type of hits Mac Jones is taking

Fronkenshteen

Wish I’d have had the balls to pick the under.

Anthony In TX

As it is, you’re just gonna have to pick under your balls

Horatio Cornblower

Sherman is addressing his mental health issues, by playing football and increasing his head trauma.

Horatio Cornblower

I forgot about Sherman’s legal issues.

Apparently the NFL would like to as well.

rockingdog

Update;
And one of the guys started nodding off at the bar and the bartender kicked him out.
Can’t be catching zzzz’s at the bar while the games on…

Doktor Zymm

What? They have only just started the 2nd quarter?? Ughhh

Sharkbait

Be like me and have more booze.

Sharkbait

Why the cinnamon toast fuck is there a Terry Bradshaw reality show?

Gatoraids

Show called Dr.CTE Popper?

Horatio Cornblower

No one has done more to piss on his playing years image than Bradshaw. Just a total fucking embarrassment at this point.

Gatoraids

Succop vs Baily only on Sunday night

Brocky

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Brick Meathook

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rockingdog

LoL
And there’s the Brady fellacio by collinsworth on that pass to AB

Bahahahahaha

Horatio Cornblower

Defense called for too many man, Belichek is seen scrawling “I have no son” on his notebook.

Sharkbait

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Gatoraids

blames ex for not blowing his coverage

Horatio Cornblower

It’s not holding if you’re doing it to protect Brady.

Mr. Ayo

For the greater good!

Horatio Cornblower

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Last edited 3 years ago by Horatio Cornblower