Your Second NFL Football Open Thread

To The Games!

Bengals/Raiders:

Burrow just continues to improve-his yards per attempt is at 8.7 this year, a full two yards better than last year’s number. Oh wait, he’s tied for the league lead in interceptions with Darnold. Having watched him a few times this year, you can tell he presses at times, trying to make things happen rather than doing that boring thing that we as fans can’t stand-checking down. Both these teams have two game losing streaks that they desperately need to end. I think if the Raiders lose it’ll start the spiral-there’s too much going on with the team and this is the last thread.

Cowboys/Chiefs:

As expected the O/U is a hefty 55.5, which I think is the highest we’ve seen this year? Vegas, and Chiefs fans think that the offensive woes that plagued the team have been solved given last week’s result. But what if that’s not the case? Well, by golly, we’ll have a devastating blowout on our hands courtesy of DAK! who has this team running on all cylinders, a missing Amari be damned.

Cards/Seahawks:

The Cards are looking sharp but Kyler isn’t. He’s a game-timer that seems to be trending towards ‘out’. After all, the Cards are on bye after this tilt and why risk further injury? So that means more of the significantly less dynamic 35 year old Colt McCoy. How do you square this? Seattle has given up the ninth-least points in the league but is one of two teams that give up more than 400 yards per game. Surely Wilson will be better than that dry thud of a game he put up last week. This might be a game where the last one with the ball gets the W.

Do your thing.

 

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Spur

Dak really fucked that up.

Game Time Decision

Shank’alor awakes

Dunstan

Me at 8: “I hope I don’t get any socks or underwear for Christmas this year.”
Me at 48: “Yay! My order of socks and underwear arrived!”

Game Time Decision

Got socks for my advent calendar thats Grinch themed. Can’t wait

litre_cola

Wife bought me ridiculously good socks last year. It was bliss.

Dunstan

Honestly, the best thing is that I’ll be able to stretch out my maximum time between doing laundry by another few days….

Spur

Thick socks/socks made for boots are the way to go.

yeah right

Nice socks also double as dusters when you have hard wood floors.

Spur

MICAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

yeah right

Wanda, my 8 year old angel fish died a little over a week ago and yes it sucks. She survived a termite tenting while being boarded at a fish store for TWO WEEKS! She survived a move in a GLOBAL FUCKING PANDEMIC and ultimately passed away quietly at home. You do get attached but at the same time it allows you to refresh and renew the tank.

I bought a couple of new angels, black and white for a yin yang thing and they’re young and energetic and they’re both pretty cool.

All better now.

litre_cola

Is an aqua room at lot of work?

yeah right

It is until you get it stabilized then it’s routine. Once you get the PH and alkaline balance right it’s easy.

Look! Here’s Betty and Wilma!
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Spur

Sorry to hear that. How did she taste?

yeah right

Oddly enough a batch of young fish born at the same time to the same parents is called a “fry.”

Game Time Decision

Future Sunday Gravy?

hippofant

RIP Wanda. May you enjoy Vision’s company again.

Horatio Cornblower

Revenge! Revenge for Wanda!
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yeah right

That is exactly her namesake.

Spur

These KC players sure are an emotional bunch

Redshirt

A fake flea flicker?

hippofant

What is a fake flea flicker? Does the QB shovel pass it back to the RB?

Redshirt

RB takes handoff but pump fakes lateral to QB.

Last edited 3 years ago by Redshirt
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Announcer in Raiders-Bengals could not give less of a shit.

Redshirt

Even the homers on Bengals Radio is struggling to give a shit.

rockingdog

LoL DAK only has 0.18 fantasy football points
Yea you read that right

Horatio Cornblower

Remember when Kellen Moore was next year’s hottest head coach prospect?

Man, October was fun.

LemonJello

I’d take him in a trade for Urban for next year.

Last edited 3 years ago by LemonJello
hippofant

JuSt TaRgEt DaNiEl SoReNsOn

litre_cola

NO TARGETTING

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I think some Bears beat reporters are still pushing him as a post-Nagy option.

litre_cola

Guys, I don’t think the Seahawks are any good anymore.

Spur

Russell is going to be happy in Denver next year.

Game Time Decision

Thought Fraudgers was going there

Dunstan

What if Wilson goes to Denver, and Rodgers to Seattle? I bet Qaron and Pete Carroll could have some fine discussions about conspiracy theories.

Game Time Decision

OMG soooo want this even as a GB fan just for the stories

litre_cola

I think our Hippo would like that. Maybe?

Redshirt

(sigh) Another pass play, another attempt by the Bengals Offensive Line to get their QB killed.

litre_cola

2021 people, I am yelling at the tv FOR the Cowboys. Money talks, and they will win the division, but FUCK.

Horatio Cornblower

“Tyreek Hill, doing what Tyreek Hill does”

Somewhere Tyreek Hill’s kid flinches involuntarily.

Spur

That KC defense is ass. Dallas should go hurry up just keep running the ball in play action.

Spur

Fucking Steele.

litre_cola

A lot of women can say that on their CV after a live porn sesh.

LemonJello

Nevermind.

Last edited 3 years ago by LemonJello
Petronel

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Horatio Cornblower

Dallas is just the dumbest fucking team.

Horatio Cornblower

This Cowboys offensive line brought to you by Tissue & Bubble Gum TM

Col. Duke LaCross

Taunting who? The crowd?

Horatio Cornblower

They have to get rid of the taunting call, like last week,

Game Time Decision

No finger lifting

rockingdog

This Bengals team seems legit
That’s Rocking!

LemonJello

Are we surprised that a Colt is seeing action in Arizona?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I can stop rooting for the Raiders once they are mathematically eliminated from the playoffs, right? I don’t have to wait until the end of the actual season?

LemonJello

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Last edited 3 years ago by LemonJello
litre_cola

I bet on Dallas, sorry Spur.

Horatio Cornblower

Just for that I’m betting on the Calvary.

litre_cola

We lost yesterday on a brutal call.

LemonJello

Gutsy call, General Custer.

Spur

It’s not December yet. I can see why you would do that.

Horatio Cornblower

3rd and 5 from the 12, and McCarthy just salivating at the chance to kick a FG.

Spur

Dallas running the ball on a suspect KC defense???
that just might work

Spur

Got on my thick socks, a nice drink and some pizza
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LemonJello

Yuck. Wet socks?

Petronel

The simple pleasures are everything.

rockingdog

Cumfy Cozy + Pizza
That’s Rocking!

Horatio Cornblower

Steele looked inside, for no discernible reason other than that he is terrible.

Spur

So its going to be one of those type of games for Dallas….might well start drinking now.

Horatio Cornblower

They’re not as good as their record, and it’s going to show today.

Petronel

FATGUYATTEMPTEDRUNBACK

Horatio Cornblower

I’d call Terence Steele a turnstile, but he doesn’t even move that much.

LemonJello

A road cone, perhaps?

Horatio Cornblower

Not orange enough. Otherwise pretty accurate.

Spur

That was less not ideal for Dallas.

Petronel

TRICKERATION

Petronel

SHANKH’LORIFICATION

Gumbygirl

Trickory dickory dock. Kelce ran up the middle.

Horatio Cornblower

I have a really bad feeling about this game from a Dallas perspective.

Just getting that out there now.

LemonJello

Grassy knoll perspective bad?

Horatio Cornblower

YEEEE-HAWWWWWWW, I BELIEVE IN CRAZY FUCKING CONSPIRAY THEORIES!!

rockingdog

Found a funny;

the masculine urge to tap all four pockets to make sure you have everything before you leave the house

yeah right

I lived, I died, I laughed, I cried, ultimately I came.

SKOL motherfuckers!

I called that shit.

Now if you’ll excuse me I’m gonna have a fucking heart attack.

LemonJello

Coach Reid and Coach McCarthy meet at midfield pregame.

Reid: “Interested in a friendly wager? If we win, you owe me 5lbs of KC BBQ. If you win, you owe me 5lbs of Texas bbq.”
McCarthy: “Deal.”

And scene.

Horatio Cornblower

McCarthy, walking back to sideline: “Nailed it!”

Anthony In TX

5 lbs? Is Andy on a crash diet?

LemonJello

Just a snack before he closes a buffet as his post game meal.

rockingdog

Firing up WR Michel Gallop
Hopefully he has a couple TDs today

King Hippo

Sir Dog, that would be MOST ROCKING

Anthony In TX

Oh, good. The only game we get in Houston is Dallas-KC. Just what I was hoping for…

Horatio Cornblower

Houston doesn’t even have a team; you’re lucky you get any football on TV at all.

Anthony In TX

Tough but fair

Spur

Let’s do this Cowboys.

Win I drink or lose I drink.

Anthony In TX

Oh, come on. Jerry don’t live in Dallas proper. He lives in whatever the most expensive suburb is.
Now, his “wife doesn’t know about it” apartment, on the other hand…

Horatio Cornblower

Mrs. Jones, (I don’t even know if there is one), has to be so far beyond caring what that old coot does these days. Just keep the cash coming, JJ.

Petronel

Optimal outcome for Qards/Hox (artist’s conception):

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Spur

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rockingdog

VaVa Vroooom

Ht @MaskTheMovie

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Fronkenshteen

How’s yer-allziz fantasy squadroons? I myself fucked around and thought I was reeeal smart. Benched McLaurin AND Swift. If you could harness my self-hatred, you could power a community college. Just waiting for Chase, Mahomes, and Evans to wreck my shit.

Horatio Cornblower

I have Jonathan Taylor.

The afternoon games are just starting and I am a 99% favoUrite to win on Yahoo.

litre_cola

White wine drunk wooooo! Been Dad duty but give tasks and I can have a rip off the bong too. Could I housewife? No. Fuck that every day.

Redshirt

Sassy Ref has evolved to Sassy Bearded Ref.

Fronkenshteen

Nagy has to be fired tonight, right?

NotShogunButShogun

You’re familiar with the ownership yes?

Horatio Cornblower

Virginia Halas isn’t.

LemonJello

Out into Lake Michigan

Spur

I say give him an extension

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It is going to be so fucking nice to leave this Raiders team behind at the end of the season.

LemonJello

Fittingly, RTD leaves his Fandom behind, drunk, waving a pistol and clocked at 150+ mph.

King Hippo

I want Red Rocket close enough for a Hail Mary

Redshirt

Well, the break’s over. The Bengals are back.

King Hippo

Did you and Rikki make a #ShameBet? Or is Cincy fandom already too much shame??

Redshirt

No and yes.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’d have bet my house that the Raiders would squander that first-and-goal and get nothing more than a field goal. I wish I had; I’d now have two houses.