Oh my, this looks like a quality tilt with all the scoring! Hope it lives up to the hype in my brain. Let’s take a look at that after we take a look at other things.
Newsy Notes:
-The Covid list reminds me of a late-era Robert Altman film in that you’d be hesitant to list all the stars on the roll for fear of missing two or three. She ain’t pretty.
-Is a Jacksonville win a mortal lock this weekend? An utterly despised coach that lived his short (13 weeks!) tenure in some figurative hovel beneath the contempt of everyone that interacted with him will certainly get his comeuppance in the form of a W, led by wr Jones, rb Robinson and the prized rook qb. Say (yet another) prayer for Houston.
-Former savior-in-waiting Cam Newton now looks to be splitting time with the not remotely capable P.J. Walker in the Carolina backfield. I guess that’s the best way for Carolina to get that Heisman winner in the draft.
-Speaking of, one of the top rb’s in that draft, Kenneth Walker, will be skipping the Spartans bowl game. What’s good for these coaches that leave teams high and dry is also good for the gander. (this joke would have been fabulous had he played for Oregon)
To The Game!
Chiefs/Chargers:
-As I noted a few weeks ago, Chiefs DC Spags would get the team’s D in working order and lo and behold, during their 6 game win spree they’ve held every team under 20. I think that run will end tonight because Chris Jones, the lynchpin of the new look is absent ce soir.
-For an 8-5 ‘inconsistent’ team, the Chargers can take the lead in the AFC West with a W here. Going forward they would have the advantage because they will have swept the Chiefs.
-Easier typed than done though because K.C. is 18-3 on the road since 2019 and the Chargers don’t exactly have a home field advantage.
-Mr. Deep Ball, Justin Herbert hasn’t had that much success vs these guys on throws over 20+ yards-he’s only 2-of-9 against them. Still, Mahomes has not thrown a TD since week 9 against any other team aside from the Raiders.
-So should the Chiefs run the ball against the Chargers lousy ground D? Slow that assumption down-L.A. has held Mixon to 54 and Barkley to 64 yards the last two weeks.
Do your thing.
@jjfozz congrats on the spawn’s acceptance to Tennessee, here’s to hoping he comes home with the prized Teabag Award.
This NFL Covid outbreak gets worse every hour. By Saturday Haslam will have put Mayfield in a gently used iron lung.
Month from now we hear about all the extra life policies Haslam took out on all his players.
Also, I’ve been gorging on My 600 Pound Life episodes.
The analytics say…so fucking tired of hearing that. analytics are great but they don’t measure flow of the game, emotion, how many beers I’ve had before I go apeshit when harbaugh pulls the old 2 point conversion play that don’t work
The concussed fucker wouldn’t have dropped that.
Would someone do the world a favor and shove Terry Bradshaw into a bubbling pool of acid? Please?
Bet the crying would get MOAR realistic…
Terry Ceviche!
I think that uses lye, but I guess I shouldn’t be so picky.
Seems unnecessarily cruel to the acid, but please proceed.
Depends. Is it really his acid?
A music producer Flow La Movie died in a plane crash today. While I never celebrate someone’s death, that’s a stupid name, even for someone in the music industry. Also, his wife has gigantic fake bobos
In the event of a water landing, could they be used as flotation devices?
yes, and also double as a life raft that seats 20
Please inflate your own breasts before assisting others with theirs.
Damn shame this Charger team has no home.
Just a lonely boy
What is a fumble?
When you tuck rule it and you’re not a LEEDER OF MEN like Dreamboat
HAHAHAHA
instead of the Matrix commercial I got the CanCon feed for an ad with Howie Mandel for Homesense. Not quite the same
It’s raining in L.A.! Yea!
oh, the humanity!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gmq4WIjQxp0
May really slack off tomorrow during work, get high and make a bunch of xmas cookies.
I’m sure all of us here say you may!
If Andy Reid suddenly leaves the sideline, it’s because I’m making meatballs.
People who make cologne commercials need to be flayed alive. christ they’re fucking dumb
Gumby is completely mesmerized by the Charlize Theron one. FLASH-LIGHT!!
Gently used? Oh, flaaash light, flash light.
In his defense…it has Charlize Theron
Time for a math lesson.
Flip a coin 5 times
2*2*2*2*2= 32
So if a league has 10 teams, their are five mathcups with 32 possible outcomes, ignoring ties.
Why am I telling you this? Because the old brockster just happens to be part of a ten man league with only 4 playoff spots, meaning it’s the last game of the regular season, and while I initially thought i was in a “win and you’re in!” situation, but my curiosity got the better of me, so I punched my league info into a playoff machine, turns out, of the 16 scenarios where I win, I make the playoffs in 14 of them. So not only do I need to win, I need one of the top three seeded teams to win their matchup (coincidentally non of them are facing each other)
All three of them are projected to lose. Fuck you universe
I was told there would be no math
YOU GO TO HELL WITH YOUR WORD PROBLEMS
IF I SUFFER YOURE GOING TO SUFFER WITH ME GOD DAMNIT!
I posted something in Facebook tonight about me and my son, I worked in the fact he got his vaccine booster just to piss off the fucktards in my wife’s family who are anti vaxers.
hoping my mother in law saw it.
LOVE IT!!!!
I posted on Facebook for the first time in forever a few weeks ago with this gen:
I hate Aaron Rodgers so much I’m going to get a booster just to flex on him!
No one reacted
LOL
It would be hilarious if alcohol had gotten stronger since the 60s like weed did. Your dad tries a sip of your Coors Lite and passes out.
That’s rocking??
I was in post secondary when there was the stupid strong beer wars. Even then the strong beers suuuuucked
Maximum Ice, Black Ice, XXX! Hell yes
How much is a 40 oz nowadays? I assume inflation has hit there as well
Evening Folks
Happy Last Real Work Day Eve
THIS GUY GUYTON I CALL A GUY BECAUSE IT’S HIS NAME!
My brother is a Guy. Actually, he’s a Francis, but my dad used to come home from work and say ‘how’s the little guy?” when he was a baby. I was learning to talk, and started calling him Guy-Guy. It stuck.
Hi Fozz, this is the brain dead project manager that has sent you 20 emails today
Yes?
What client is this blog for?
The client name is in the file name
Oh, didn’t see that
Okay, ask me again in another 5 minutes and I will leave a dead puppy in your car.
You got a job? Bummer, dude.
Nah, not yet. I’m still freelancing, but this project manager is dumber than Troy Aikens
And frame them as the one who killed the puppy.
Is there a shortage of dead hookers in Baltimore available to be put in his trunk?
Never a shortage of those in this city.
To be fair, some of them are only dead in spirit
Mahomes is the guy who walks past you when you drop something in the grocery store parking lot and doesn’t offer to help.
Oldest just got into University of Tennessee.
He can challenge Headliner to a game of horseshoes. A game of HORSESHOES!
He is the not “run through a wall” one right? Congrats!
No, that run through the wall son is going to jail, not college
The Marines are always looking for talent.
The youngest will bail him out or lawyer him out.
Is that his first choice?
He has his heart set on Univ of South Carolina, but he was pumped about getting into Tennessee
You can’t beat those Cocks!
All I know of The Matrix is that it supplied “Red Pill” to those Q-fucktards, so I am glad to have never seen any of the moving pictures.
I thought I was the only one!
we’s can scoff at the plebians over brunch, eh?
Don’t let those fuckers ruin it for you. The first one is really good. Don’t bother with the rest.
Yes Troy the guy shaking on the stretcher is just cold. No other reason for the shaking
Wtf Troy
it’s cold FOAR LA GUYS
So like 95?
Balls has worn his Cavalry FC toque all week
Too bad he was using it as a banana hammock and not as a skull covering.
Still keeping a head warm
Uhh, it was -34 here today and I was nae shivering outside in a hoodie Troy.
Damn. +12 here today but windy. Wasn’t cold outside in a hoodie either. Lol
That was Joe. So the comment wasn’t concussion-induced, surprisingly.
Was it? That kinda makes it worse
Poor guy just needs his blankee.
Yeah, what the fuck was that? Maybe a piece of Troy’s brain stem shook loose and was blocking oxygen
I kinda love that that comment was so fucking stupid people are just assuming it must have been Aikman.
If anyone would know what that player is going through it’s Troy
Oh right, today is Thursday and it is nighttime and there is football. Two redeyes in the same week, with the one last night resulting in very little sleep because of a gigantic teenager wedged in the middle seat of my row, followed by a day of meetings, has destroyed whatever tenuous sense of time I had. So, Hello, fellow time-bound humans!
Doktor, with all you fly, how are you not upgraded to 1st class comfort business executive plus plus supreme with extra cheese every time?
I was in Main Cabin Extra (and ended at 2 on the upgrade list) but this kid was HUGE. His teeny tiny mother and sister were in the row one ahead, they clearly didn’t want to sit with him.
If you fly coach you are cargo.
Fly business class, get in that big seat, board first and get a free drink, and then watch and look down on all the coach passengers as they walk back into steerage with rest of their poor and filthy peers, barely holding on to any shred of a reason to continue in their miserable lives. Plus there’s no middle seat.
Domestic first is still nothing to write home about, and only United has brought back PDBs. Nawt worth it to pay the extra for domestic.
Yes it is. Life is too short to sit in coach.
Where in the world is Doktor Zymm?
Maryland right now! Florida tomorrow, then a boat!
“We’ve secretly replaced the turf at SoFi Stadium with FedEx Fields’….let’s see if anyone notices.”
Brandon Staley forgot to reup his anti-curse insurance after Thanksgiving apparently.
“Luckily we replaced the LA’s Rams Dr’s. with ones that graduated from the US. Hopefully this will save the players lives.”
I assumed they used SoFi to finance portions of the turf purchase and they used the health of the players as collateral on the loan that is now being called in
Well So-Fi is sort of a loan shark.
And Keenan is ded.
NO HE IS NOT
HE CAN’T BE. NOT POSSIBLE.
HE HAS RISEN! and limped to the sideline to get treatment by the medical staff.
Joe WHAT THE FUCK
I think I figured out how to log in.
But
making pizza
drinking beer
So much input
Thinking maybe that
jalapenos
pepperoni
sausage
bacon
artichoke
onion
green peppers
garlic
and mushrooms
is too much
or
not enough.
To use the comments, you don’t need to hit enter after every word.
You
can
if
you
want
though.
I
Know
Was
A poor
Joke
The green pepper people are going to come at you.
Why, he has it listed.
There are big time green pepper haters around these parts. Zymm and teh Hippo for sure, there are others.
No issues here, we eat quite a few per month.
Have you tried cheesesteak stuffed green peppers? Delightful.
Those do sound good.
Worst. Pizza Topping. Ever.
There it is.
Gumby hates them too.
And we know he has good taste because he married you!
Poetry.
That’s Rocking!
Someone want to tell the Clipper’s D that its OK to start playing again?
Oh boy.
I gave blood today!
So a cheap(er) drunk tonight
And noice
Depends on where you found the blood.
Was it your blood this time?
Thatsssss Rockingggg!!!
Are you part of scotchy’s hobo laundering network?
“BurtonVultureDown!”
-sponsored by Josh Gordon’s TD last week
Found a funny;
whenever i feel my anxiety getting worse i drink a big coffee and go on social media so i can try for a new high score
Funny yet so wrong
I just saw they were taking a guy of the field.
What happened??
Clipper (Parham) potentially got Shaziered in the end zone.
He tried to catch a ball, was tackled, did not seem to be bad, but his motions have me worried for spinal injury. That was not him showing he was OK, but was more like a rictus.
Parnham stretched out and briefly caught a back-of-the-endzone pass. He rolled over and landed on his left, I think, and then the ball jarred loose and he went totally unconscious, arms locked in a bent position. Not sure if he hit his head or neck or back on the ground, but definitely a central nervous injury of some sort. They stabilized him without moving him or removing his helmet. Arms locked in bent position all the way off the field on the backboard. Fucked up shit.
Oh also it was almost entirely no contact. A safety maybe glanced him with a foot hopping over him, but it seemed almost entirely a freak accident.
Warren Sharp’s got a tweet here, but it’s pretty much NSFL:
https://twitter.com /SharpFootball/status/1471654267425538049
Landed on the back of his head. Was knocked out; he was in that pugilistic response pose, which you get when you’re knocked all the way out.
Oh shit.
That’s not rocking. 😮
“Taking extra precautions with ham is just good thinking.”
-A. Reid
“Has anyone suggested slathering him in brown sugar and pineapple?”
“What’s his internal temperature?”
“If surgery will be involved, might I propose a spiral cut?”
Maybe dig a hole in the ground and cook it there.
“Banana leaves are a wonderful balm.”
Jeebus, did they use VX as paint thinner in that end zone?
Justin Herbert is murdering all his own receivers.
Ded clipper
Go for it.
Daaaaaaang man, falling down like that after hitting the open-field block set-up too. So many open-field runners don’t do that right, and Roberts does, but he just faceplants! Gah.
Inglewood! Up to no good!
Erin, showing some cougar flesh for Pizzaface Boi. She don’t even need the moneys smgdh
Suits and tennis shoes is SUCH a dumb look. Makes one seem…Darnold-ish
What’s so bad about wanting to look special?
OK that was a cool intro. First time seeing the intro.
As the 8th seed against the Buggernaut that is Balls’ 11-3 team, I’m doing the triple stack of Herbert, Williams and Allen. #allornothing
“Triple stack? That’s one of my top 100 breakfasts!”
-A.Reid
Now I want pancakes.
So who is going to replace these chuckelfucks next year?
♫Meet the new chucklefucks♫
♫Same as the old chucklefucks♫
with apologies to The Who
I started CE-H, so apologies to all who get fucked by his inevitable 6 carries for 11 yards.
I’m holding Kamara, Edmonds, CE-H, Rhamondre, and Rashaad Penny.Need 2 RB & a flex out of that motley lot. Part of me wants so badly to pocket CE-H this week. But then Conner will recover miraculously, and Damien Harris will start as well. I fucking HATE Thursday games.
Have to choose between Taysom Hole and Tua [sound of hip snapping] as well.
Every inch of my grisly body and mind is a testament to bad decisions made. Week 15 will be no different.
This is my mindset (and body-set) EXACTLY
.
We’re 15 days from 2022
We’re also 15 days from 2019 being 3 fucking years ago. Wtf
Evening all.
Howdy! I need Chiefs, over, Hill td. Let’s gooooo!
*Plus way more ff stuff than usual for a Thursday
So glad I did not do fantasy this year
I have enough disappointment, exhaustion, and worry in my life, don’t need more.
This is my last
I don’t feel bad I quit your lge after this year then! HAIL GAMBLOR