The NCAAs start later this week, but today is all about NFL free agency.
Enough ados.
The Bengals—the Bengals!—have been wheelin’ and dealin’
- DT B.J. Hill (“3” years)
- OL Ted Karras (“3” years)
- OG Alex Kappa (from Bucs, “4” years)
The quotes are not a bit. Remember: except for QBs, NFL contracts fall in three categories: (1) rookie contract, (2) one-year contract, and (3) two years + “Yeah, we’ll see”.
Dolphins – QB Teddy Bridgewater (1 year)
Patriots – S Devin McCourty (1 year)
Non-Gendered Cow Persons – WR Michael Gallup (“5” years)
Steelers – Truf Bisquet. I’ve yet to understand Trubisky’s prominence, except as bitterness fuel
Bears – DT Larry Ogunjobi (from CIN, “3” years)
Chargers – CB J.C. Jackson (from the Pats, “5” years)
Qards
- TE Zach Ertz (re-signed for “3” years)
- RB James Conner (“3” years)
- QB Colt McCoy (“2” years; developmental QBs are cheeeeeeeep)
Jags – WR Christian Kirk (“4” years)
Lotta Twitter heat for the Kirk signing, for the alleged $84 mil given by Jax. It’s not a bad signing. Kirk had very good games, especially when on my FF bench.
Vikings – QB Kirk Cousins (TWO yea—
If Cousins continues to fail forward, he’ll ascend to Heaven by 2024.
RAMMMITT!
- OL Joe Noteboom (“3”-year extension)
- C Brian Allen (“3”-year extension)
NY Jets – WR Braxton Berrios
(re-signed 2 years)
C-Hox
- S Quandre Diggs (re-signed “3” years)
- TE Will Dissly (re-signed “3” years)
Titans – C Ben Jones Woooo! (2 years)
Bills – G Rodger Saffold?!
MARITAL NEWS
There is a phrase in English that, to me, is captivating: “familiarity breeds contempt”. The premise is that getting to know someone will foster disgust. There’s lots of wisdom there, but I can only imagine the hellish chasm that was the Brady-Bundchen household for these last two months.
Ah, it’s bad form to speculate what goes on inside a family home. Although I read somewhere that most sons outgrow makeout sessions with dad.
And hey: when I said “captivating” I meant it. There is no equivalent in Spanish for “familiarity breeds contempt”. For us Latin folks, putting “family” in any negative connotation is Race Treason.
SPROTS TONITE
Listings by espen, all times Central:
NHL
Arizona @ Ottawa – 6:30
NBA
Clippers @ Cavs – 6:00
Blazers @ Hawks – 6:30
Nuggets @ 76ers – 6:30
Hornets @ Thunder – 7:00
Timberwolves @ Spurs – 7:30
Wizards @ Warriors – 9:00
Bulls @ Kings – 9:00
Bucks @ Jazz – 9:00
Raptors @ lakers – 9:30
FÚTBOL
Paraguay Primera División
Nacional v. Libertad – 6:15
Ecuador Liga Pro
Guayaquil City v. Delfín – 7:00
Bolivia Liga Professional
The Strongest v. Bolívar – 6:00
AND FINALLY,
It’s nice to see that the NCAA Madness spills up to April 4. And now that MLB returns on April 7, there is an opportunity for uninterrupted escapism up to the 2022 World Series. It’s a nice bridge to the NFL season; all I would need is make my mind find baseball absorbing
Sorry; didn’t mean to kink-shame. Happy Pi Day, peeps!
I am so rooting for Becky Lynch.
Thanks for the roll up Don T, funny shit as usual.
The Hudson Valley Renegades are apparently auditioning people for the National Anthem, and if you think your friendly neighborhood weasel isn’t gonna go for that, you’re only slightly wrong because hey, if I can also get Senorita Weaselo on it via violin duo that’s double the money AND it becomes date night!
You need a videographer. We need to bask in your reflected glory, like we did when the Maestro rode the zamboni.
Best of luck to you both. After this mornings post by Litre-Wife, I’m all about bringing the SO and being supportive.
My shoes and socks have reached chemical weapon status. I feel Kevin’s angst.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qMSOZWHz9xc&t=88s
Are you a super soaker? They have decent treatments for that now, I believe a wee nip of botox helps.
Also read that Padres superstar baseball player Fernando Tatis Jr hurt his hand and is out for 3 months.
That’s Not Rocking.
Opening Day is April 7th.
Found a funny;
Daylight Savings Time barely affects you when you live your life with no discernible sense of order
I had almost forgotten this 🤣
https://youtube.com/shorts/Sfl8qoZ-bBY?feature=share
Currently spending the evening at the theatre.
Bruce Dickinson spoken word tour.
Sing 2?
More Satanic references.
Hockey Uphate:
Your beloved Sens outshot the opposition 43-15 and lost 5-3.
:
“Hmmm, what if we let people into the game for free, and charge them a dollar for every shot on goal our team gets?”
Eugene M.
The Ottawa Senators Monday morning at 9am:
https://youtu.be/RLySXTIBS3c
Hey, they’re not playing the Ice Giants with Shesty in goal, what gives?
Oh hey, there’s a Letterkenny special for International Women’s Day! Imma watch that now
It’s awesome! Enjoy!
Also, if you didn’t see it, friend of the site & Letterkenny writer Trevor Risk did an amazing Twitter thread last week about the Jaromir Jagr hockey fundraiser for the Ukraine.
https://twitter.com/sunshinesucks/status/1501240972948221963?s=21
That made me so happy! Jagr rocks, always has, always will!
Has anyone seen Our Flag Means Death? I’m intrigued.
I started to the other day but my WiFi went down. I may try it tonight when I get home from work.
I watched the first one. Started a wee bit slow, but I think it is silly fun. I need to see a few more to be sure.
What’s Phil Kessel’s favorite bird?
-A Huffin’ Puffin
Your beloved Sens are outshooting the Cay-oats 32-9 and are down 3-2. Maybe if you cheered harder?
Fuck daylight savings
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=br0NW9ufUUw
Counterpoint: “One hour? Oh my god! Did I grow a big bushy beard? Is my milk expired? You don’t even have to live the hour that’s being adjusted.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q_EkxFlVqZA&ab_channel=WCWRULES4LYF
Yeah, Spring Forward sucks, but for a night owl like me the 9:30 sunset is pretty nice.
I like it cause I can go to bed an hour early.
I am fucking exhausted. How is it only Monday.
I assume the internets are having a ball with it but I was laughing my ass off as the Sens had the Coyotes penned in their own end for just over two minutes. Fat Phil Kessel was doubled over in exhaustion and begging the refs to blow the whistle. Absolutely hilarious.
Not gonna lie, I’d take Kessel on the 3rd line for a mid round pick, which is apparently his price. He can have all the New York dirty water dogs he wants
How bad are the Reds chances this year? The 6th highest salary (for now, at least) makes only $3.5 million and it’s Ken Griffey Jr.
Ownership group is probably doing just fine.
Wait, is Ken Griffey Jr. playing or coaching?
Why the cinnamon toast fuck is there only 1 hockey game tonight?
It’s about gotdamn time that the league featured the behemoth-in-the-making that is the Ottawa Senators. smgdh…
Now I want cereal.
a fuck would also be nice, but since they took backpage down I don’t know how to arrange that no MOAR
Have you seen the cinnamon toast churros cereal?
YES! I’ve eaten it.
Wondrous
@Hippo If you can bet on Mexican Women’s Soccer, you should place a large bet on Tigres to win the 2nd half against Toluca.
Just Saying…
interesante!
the lines were muy crazimente, so I bet on there being a 2nd goal (-210 – to make $100)
GOOD JERB BALLS!!!
There ya go!
And there’s an insurance goal. 😁
For some reason the Giants signings were overlooked
Wr/special teamer Robert Foster
And
Wr/special teamer C.J. Board
Talk about making a splash!
And Sterling Shepard! Whom I’ve managed in FF forever.
Ah, I could’ve made it about me in the post too. Live and learn I guess.
Is there any other reason to post?
/I’m just asking questions
[does a cannonball] – Elisha
Jets got Uzomah. That one hurts.
Much like Uzomah’s knee.
Yeah, I’m thinking that and his Achilles from 2020 why the Bengals didn’t beat 3yrs/$24M. Good for CJ, for getting the payday while he can but it still hurts.
From what I’m sensing around the League (including Donks sending Noah Fant to Truther Land) – any non-elite TE is basically considered fungible.
Non
Fungible
Tight end.
Cryptobros in shambles RN
Also, yes Latinos DO NOT talk bad about family. We may literally kill them, but we do not talk bad about family.
The worst you’ll ever hear is: “Cada quien…”
“Well you know how he is” = Quite racist
“He really wasn’t thinking” = Very racist
“Very conservative” = misses slavery
Exactly
“He means well, but…” = Subconsciously racist
In Latino families, that’s equivalent to “Pretty racist”
Baseball is great for napping.
(while watching Reds unload everything of value)
(in Jack Nicholson voice)
“Forget it, Balls. Cincy’s a Football Town, now.”
Fun in person. Boring as hell on tv.
If they ever figure out how to have a fan watch a live game VR style, then Baseball will make one hell of a comeback.
Baseball is fun in person. Other than that, it’s background noise
Baseball on the radio was great, but the Old Lefthander and Marty Brennaman aren’t on anymore.
I remember listening to the Reds with my papaw in the summer, sitting on the porch on a summer evening, waiting for it to cool down a little bit before going to bed. Lighting bugs would be flashing across the street, and there might be some heat lighting off in the distance.
My papaw died while I was still in high school, forty-four years ago to the day today. I still miss him.