I cruised through Netflix last night, stopping randomly on a British movie called, you guessed it, ‘Villain’. I just love movies about gangsters where I understand every third word. I would say it was hardly original, but entertaining enough. Most importantly, it clocked in at a tidy 97 minutes, which is something more movies could take a lesson from these days. I, for one, do not need 220 minutes on why Batman’s fucked up childhood as led to his current life as a full-time billionaire, part-time vigilante. Do something, Congress!

Anyway, it did strike me that the villain is often the most interesting character in any particular medium, and that drafting them would kill a Monday almost as effectively as a villain might dispose of someone who has looked at them the wrong way.

For the rules, we go to this week’s commissioner, a man I would consider an all-timer at portraying villains, Mr. Peter Lorre.

The rules are simple, yet complicated, much like the ideal villain. They can be either an antagonist or a protagonist. Their role in the particular medium does not matter so much as their actions. The only rule I will impose strictly is that you cannot take an undead killing machine; there will be no Freddy Krugers or Jason Voorhees here. That’s too easy. Darth Vader would be an excellent choice, but so would Walter White: while one is clearly an antagonist and one a protagonist, both engage in activities undeniably villainous. Choose to your taste.

Just for some meta fun, Peter Lorre characters are on the board. If a conflict arises that Peter feels he is not able to impartially decide, I’ll have my first pick step in.

Speaking of that, with the first pick, something that should be obvious from the featured image, I take Tywin Lannister. Charles Dance’s portrayal of Tywin in ‘Game of Thrones’ was terrific. A man absolutely worthy of hatred, a man undeniably opposed, (frequently quite successfully), to the protagonists, yet not without the (very) occasional redeeming touch.

The rest of you are on the clock. As always, wait ten picks or 30 minutes.