I will still play in Freezer Vodka League, if nothing but to keep my decaying mind functional.  But I swore last season would be my last in my high-intensity, moneyed fantasy auction league.

True, there is NOTHING like the rush of the auction itself.  Pre-Pandemic/Zombie apocalypse, I drove from Wake County, NC to Springfield, VA every.  Single.  LaboUr Day for the live proceedings, on the back deck of a local sports bar.  This generally meant hitting the road around 5 am, and a round trip home after (shamefully limiting myself to 0-1.5 total beers during said auction and lunch), in God-awful traffic.

More or less, it was my entire identity.

But FUCK A DUCK, does it ever stress me out.  I get fully immersed in my team, and crave winning like some kind of super-opiate.  And then FITBAW happens, and I rage like a madman (even if I keep most of the feelings inside – I am STILL a man, after all).  This League is cutthroat as fuck, and we carry 20-man rosters (both ideal elements for me, but perhaps feeding my worst OCD charcteristics).

So here is where y’all come in.  My League of 12 got 10 “yes, I am in” responses, a “hard no” from Litre, and a “meh, probably not” from me.  After which I told them that if they got an 11th, then I would re-join to be #12 (really, playing with less than 12 is a sham, in my view).  That said (Litre and the still-active Spam and Scotchnaut can confirm), this group of humoUrous assholes is somehow even less social/people-loving than DFO.  There is NO WAY they will successfully recruit.  I kept us going with my DFO recruitment efforts two seasons ago, when we shifted to online auctioning.

So, if you REALLY think Hippo should keep getting his OCD rage on, you should probably also consider joining.  It’s $150 entry, and lots of ways to cash out.  Buying people is way more fun than you will want to admit to others in society.

There are likely non-FITBAW sprots on tonight, but you all have the internet to see what these pitiful options might be.