Grittiest Little SNF Thread

Your regular host asked for a fill-in, so he could sharpen his tools for the winter “harvesting.”  What did we learn early?

  1. We got an announcer boo-boo late in the Commies/Tits fixture!  The name that shall not be named.
  2. Clippers du Merde and #ThePauls are the stupidest teams in the NFL, and should play MOAR often.
  3. Magic Undies started against somebody in the TE slot.  Probably Brocky.  An all-time monster performance.
  4. Go ahead and crown his ass, Brian Daboll = COY.
  5. Hey, at least the Redshite lost.  Gooners are rightly top of the Table.
  6. Refs gift MRSA a win for tackling Dreamboat.  In other words, water still wet.
  7. No, I won’t discuss every fixture, that’s what teh Monday is for.

Team WKRP (+3) at Ratbirds (8:20, NBC)

It’s the Division one can never predict, and perhaps the two most schizo franchises of the young season.  I read a long piece in The Athletic earlier about Beatie Mixon and the Bungles’ run-blocking struggles.  Does this presage a breakout?  Stoma Fuckers Utd. sure hope so.  I wouldn’t bet on it.

Lamar! is having an MVP season, in a universe where there is no Brokeback.  He is still appointment television, especially with a defense as leaky as this one.  I very much could see this Division coming down to the CIN/BAL tiebreaker, so no exaggeration to say is yuuuuuuuggggge and not just mandatory.

But obviously, still very goddamned mandatory.

Enjoy the Fozz/Redshirt Derby, everyone.

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King Hippo
Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan. Also a proud fookin' Evertonian. Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child. [Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
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Horatio Cornblower

Folks, if anyone of you had the Mets winning the 2022 World Series I have some news you may want to sit down for.

Recovery Whiskey
Recovery Whiskey

SUDDEN SEMI EXPECTED TURNAROUND

Redshirt

Augh.

blaxabbath

The office where Ryan is making them work on a weekend for Dunder Mifflin Infinity is on.

Our the second half? I haven’t watched any football this weekend.

blaxabbath

They’re gonna go to NY to club with him now.

WCS

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Doktor Zymm

Can we make. joe Burrow be David Bowie in Labyrinth for Halloween? I think he could pull it off with the right hair and makeup

Recovery Whiskey

I wish I had photoshop skills

Brick Meathook

Did I just see a Scientology commercial?

blaxabbath

Worked for the Mormons

Brick Meathook

Was that nationally aired? Or was it just Los Angeles (which I at least would understand)

Dunstan

Are you sure it wasn’t one of Rick “I swear I’m not a Republican anymore” Caruso’s attack ads on Karen Bass?

Can’t say I’m thrilled with the way Bass sucked up to Scientology, but having seen politicians kiss the pope’s ass forever, I can’t get that worked up about it.

Doktor Zymm

What about the Mermens?

Brick Meathook

Some flags in Baltimore:

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Horatio Cornblower

One of those looks a lot like one very close to me at the moment.

Horatio Cornblower

It’s getting faded all to shit, but no way that thing’s coming down. At best it’ll get non-game days off during the winter.

Recovery Whiskey

Thats very close visual to in front of McGinty’s in Silver Spring MD. Almost like the region has some theme going

Doktor Zymm

Oh crap, totally forgot next week is coweagles in prime time. Good thing I will be in Chicago and probably very drunk and eating Thai food

Horatio Cornblower

I’ll be at a bonfire.

Horatio Cornblower

Chicago Board of Zoning Appeals, Tuesday on CBS. Because fuck it, why not?

The Maestro

The episode where someone spikes the break room coffee is gonna be tense, folks.

WCS

That’s NBC. CSI: FBI: NCIS: NASA: TLDR: II is on Tuesday.

BugEyedBoo

Don’t give them any ideas.

Redshirt

NCIS: Barrow. Because elfs and elks matter as well!

Horatio Cornblower

Not hobbits though. Fuck those hairy-footed weirdos.

Horatio Cornblower

That was a touching story from Melissa Stark about someone yelling “Hey, isn’t that Joe Burrows’s mom!?”

Too bad she left out the part that Zach Wilson was the one yelling it.

Last edited 2 years ago by Horatio Cornblower
Doktor Zymm

Evens going in!

Doktor Zymm

It’s negroni time! Also avocado hummus time, them thar brits don’t know how avocados work

Horatio Cornblower

I’m not even gonna make the joke(s), but who possibly thought it was a good idea to base a commercial around Andy Reid getting personal?

BugEyedBoo

State Farm still has Aaron Rogers commercials, so vetting ideas isn’t their strong suit. Although that one where the girl saves shrimp tails makes me laugh every time I see it.

Horatio Cornblower

JPP has been a nice addition to the Ravens, which is better than he’s been to his own hand, where he practices addition by subtraction.

WCS

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Doktor Zymm

No defensive holding calls!

Doktor Zymm

I miss the roughly 5 year period where all the technology we have now was mature enough to work well but not mature enough yet to be over-engineered and full of bloatware

Horatio Cornblower

Missed most of the Cowboys game while at a bonfire.

Based on how the D performed you can expect most of eastern CT to burn between now and the end of the season.

Doktor Zymm

In French, bon means good! You went to a good fire! Fire, GOOD

Horatio Cornblower

It was good! As was the beer!

LemonJello

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WCS

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BugEyedBoo

Joe Burrow is looking like a caucasian Grace Jones in those outfits they just showed.

The Maestro

The Bengals did a… good??

Is that allowed?

Redshirt

Bengals are…uh…uh…leg passing? Ground-gaining? Its been so long, I forgot what it was called.

Brocky

Okay, time for a throw back, anyone wanna guess the origin of this pic?

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The Maestro

Shoulda been Trogdor.

WCS

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Brocky

Not exactly… keep guessing

WCS

2006? Sex Cannon’s weekly stats.

Brocky

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Redshirt

Bengals do a good?

Redshirt

Oh, yeah. That.

Redshirt

I think we got one the first drive. Maybe.

BugEyedBoo

Yes. Only one until this series.

Brocky

They have one. I think

Brocky

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WCS

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Last edited 2 years ago by WCS
Brocky

Chucky legit scared the shit out of me when I was really little. Like ages 3 to 6 I was terrified

Doktor Zymm

Ok, I guess I’m the only one whose first thought was shoplifting

WCS

Or someone with an impeccable sense of humor.

Doktor Zymm

If you can combine petty larceny with a fine joke, you are my kind of criminal

WCS

I wouldn’t steal it; I’d hide it in the employee break room.

Last edited 2 years ago by WCS
Doktor Zymm

It is very charitable of Yahoo to think there is a 3% chance of Josh Jacobs getting 18 more points than Mahomes tomorrow. I will go ahead and congratulate Spam for beating me in Vodka league right now

LemonJello

Need booky-book recommendations – the LemonJello Booze Cruise shoves off Thursday.

Prefer Sci-Fi or Historical Fiction.

And. GO!

Doktor Zymm

Do you enjoy steampunk? If you haven’t read them, the Clockwork Century series by Cherie Priest are great. Start with Boneshaker

BugEyedBoo

N. K. Jemisin’s Broken Earth trilogy won back to back to back Hugos, and were that good.

Last edited 2 years ago by BugEyedBoo
BugEyedBoo

Neal Stephenson’s Baroque Cycle, if you want history-flavored Stephenson. Has the same problem with nearly all of Stephenson’s books, though; they don’t have endings so much as they just stop.

Dunstan

Iain M. Banks’ Culture novels

The Three-Body Problem

For historical: the Aubrey/Maturin novels by Patrick O’Brian

The Maestro

A beer should be, at very most, three dollars at a bar.

It’s bread water. That’s all it ever was. Tasty, but simple. Let’s not kid ourselves.

We lost our way as a society when we allowed inflation to end dollar beer nights at the bar.

Doktor Zymm

How does it feel being an old man, old man?

The Maestro

I’ve been waiting for this my whole fucking life. I feel incredible, which considering I’m apparently now an old man, means of course that I feel like shit.

LemonJello

Tie an onion onto your belt and go yell at the clouds!

Brick Meathook

Here’s a guy in Baltimore:

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Doktor Zymm

In a crazy twist, they don’t have the game on in the lounge, just NFL Network highlights. Had to bust out my laptop, just in time to see a Geico commercial. Forgot my headphones so don’t have to listen to whoever is doing talkies tonight

Recovery Whiskey

Tirico and Collinsworth. So not missing much

Last edited 2 years ago by Recovery Whiskey
Recovery Whiskey

Nobody within 10 yards and he fair catches

WCS

Meanwhile, Hippo broods in the Fortress of Pillatude, and crosses the eyes out of another picture of Nathaniel Hackett.

Doktor Zymm

You don’t even have to coach a NFL team for a full year to have an era named after you. Kinda cheapens it

Redshirt

“Eh, I’m okay with it.” – Wm. Harrison

The Maestro

So after all this turkey and family and card playing and what have yous, I have finally returned home and get to sit alone in my basement in complete silence, with a beer and an edible, and get to watch SNF.

Absolute perfection.

Plus all of you are here with me, so that’s even better.

Redshirt

I’m starting to think the Ravens may be better than the Jets and Dolphins.

Doktor Zymm

Almost to the lounge, have I missed anything awesome or all suck so far?

Brick Meathook

Does your lounge give you free drinks?

Recovery Whiskey

Any airport lounge worth the name should do exactly that

Doktor Zymm

I only know of one that doesn’t, this one has a pretty good selection

Recovery Whiskey

Divisional slugfest

LemonJello

JPP really has his finger on the pulse of the Cincy Offense.

Redshirt

JPP’s number is actually 3 1/2, but NFL requires integers, so it rounds up to 4.

BugEyedBoo

Should be truncated instead.

Recovery Whiskey

Kommentariat: if you have never had Chugwater Chili please order some and make a batch it is pretty good. https://www.chugwaterchili.com/products/chugwater-chili

Brocky

So since I’m in a pissy mood already, went to a haunted house last night. I’ll go back to my old habit of posting horror gifs.

On that note, the sheriff’s death from the blob remake is one of the most painful looking movie deaths I’ve ever seen.

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Gatoraids

Thought the sink one was worst, the initial absorb of the doctor was good quality too

Gatoraids

Nice 80s horror run of practical effects the Thing, The Blob and The Fly. All money into special effects none in trick titles

BugEyedBoo

The Thing, with Kurt Russell, is the best of that list, by far. If you haven’t seen it you should.

Brocky

To think I’m old enough to have to tell youngins to watch it.

..I saw the fly remake way too young. Was not ready for that shit

Brocky

If you ever wonder how terrible i actually am at fantasy football

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WCS

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Brocky

Yep. I assumed not practicing till Thursday would have made david montg not have his best game of the season, but no.

Also shame on me for picking up a new kicker

BugEyedBoo

I heard, “Why the fuck don’t they use Singletary more?” on this site so often, that I figured his time has finally arrived this year, and drafted him for my team. In retrospect, that might have been a mistake.

Recovery Whiskey

Key and Peele made player intros be comedy forever.

scotchnaut

Damn. Bengali’s cheerleaders ain’t skipping situp day.

Recovery Whiskey

Likely skipping a few meals though

BugEyedBoo

<Insert ‘sausage’ joke here>

BugEyedBoo

<insert ‘insert sausage’ joke here>

WCS

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scotchnaut

Was ‘meh’ regarding Florio until I heard him go on a full-on rant regarding the MAGA crowd a few weeks ago. It was completely out of the blue. So obvious that he needed to get it off his chest. Loved it.

Redshirt

Its still funny when you hear that pause when someone picks the Bengals to win a tough game.

“I’m going to pick the… …. …. Bengals.”

… … … (thinking): “Am I insane? Do I still have COVID? Why am I picking them?!”

blaxabbath

Didn’t watch the Cardinals game but am all in for the Cardinals Talk post-game show.

Sounds like just the same old bullshit with these idiots.

scotchnaut

Many, many thanks to The Hippo for filling in tonight-work stuff and family obligations drained me. Much love directed towards Carolina.

WCS

Don’t tell Horatio…

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ArmedandHammered

Those are some hella throwback jerseys.

Redshirt

If anything, this game should show exactly which illusion is closer to what the Bengals actually are: the team who won two games in a row by protecting the QB, taking what the defense gives them and allowing the other teams to make the mistakes, or the team who lost two games in a row by getting their QB maimed, trying to go for the deep-pass killshots when it wasn’t there and putting themselves in too many deep holes to overcome.

WCS

Crippling injury to Burrow to complete the Bungles Bingo Card!

Redshirt

Oh, gee. This is a toughie. If I have to choose one of those options, I’d choose Door Number Hippo.

scotchnaut

Ha!

blaxabbath

Filling up your bungL card.

Redshirt

The spots already been hit (thank you Redcateds). Its not quite like Greg Cook’s injury, but its still a what-if question how a slightly more mobile Burrow would be like.

WCS

Brian Daboll has Danny Dimes looking… I don’t know if “competent” is the right word, but, yeah, COY.

Redshirt

“Cromulent”?

LemonJello

Loose stools instead of liquid shit?

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