Last Wednesday evening, NY Mets brass rushed into a panic room after Edwin Sugar Díaz, the best paid reliever in baseball, tore his patellar tendon. Díaz got injured while celebrating with fellow #TeamRubio mates, after PR eliminated the Dominican Republic 5-2 in the 2023 World Baseball Classic. It felt kinda… Deflating.

You: How deflating was it?

I felt for Díaz, a victim of a major, yoooge fluke. Slipping in bathtub and breaking your neck is more probable (source: Secopad Marketing Labs). It was a fluke injury, something inconceivable to the gaggle of scolds calling for the end of these unnatural baseball exhibitions that have been playing in Asia and the US for the past several weeks. Christ; almost everyone paid money to comment on sports is a certified expert on what already happened—retrospective savants who, in colloquial boricua, tell you it’s a dog after cupping its balls.

It goes like this: if it happened, it’s possible. And if it’s possible, it’s foreseeable—foreseeable! Which means that the injury is the product of, of… something. Yeah, something that must be done away forever!, goes the think-of-the-chilluns alarmist soapboxing.

It’s simplistic bullshit, and, as provocation, the rotting fruit fallen off the taeks tree.

Yeah it pisses me off, but I’ll try being objective. Let’s see… Ok, I guess not all Democrats are concerned about the sex lives of abuelas.

Shit happens. Loads of crap are beyond ones’ control. There is risk in everything. In everything. I have nothing against folks who always pick the safest alternative. Hell, that takes discipline. Much respect, you consistent toe-dippers you.

But I have no patience for fuckers who rush to pick the least fun alternative. Being a coward AND a spoilsport is sad way to live.

Bonus! Implying that the MLB is the only entity noble enough to exploit income from baseball is… Wow. You, sir, are an action figure.

The WBC is big in the Caribbean and in Korea and Japan. PR against Dominicana is like Falcons vs. Saints, Haagen Dazs vs. Ben & Jerry’s, Bears vs. Packers and Probity vs. Dan Snyder all rolled into one. They should hold the WBC every three years. And eventually the World Series will be this tournament because sometime all people born before 1970 will die, Pete Rose will get into FanDuel’s Hall of Fame, and Roger Clemens will find someone who is not beneath him.

NFL NEWS

-Oh! Almost forgot. Houston Astro José Altuve is sidelined indefinitely for a fractured right thumb by a bean ball in yesterday’s Venezuela @ USA! USA! According to what little I know of current baseball, pitcher Daniel Bard is a hero to mankind.

-Some signings, nothing of consequence. I just didn’t have the heart to delete the section header.  Here’s a link to English espendeportes, if yer ticklish curiosity-wise.

SPROTS TONITE

NATIONAL HOCKEY LEAGUE

Hockey gets eastern times, glossy paper stock:

All times Central

Professional Roundball

Creighton (6) vs Baylor (3) – 6:10

Fairleigh Dickinson (16) vs Florida Atlantic (9) – 6:45

Miami (5) vs. Indiana (4) – 7:40

TCU (6) vs Gonzaga (3) – 8:40

I gots Gonz. as my winner. No, you are the one pre-crowing.

Overtly Professional Roundball

Tirana @ Milwaukee – 7:00

Clips @ Portland – 8:00

Orlando @ Lakers – 8:30

Top Flight Fútbol (full list)

Venezuela

Caracas FC hosts Metropolitanos – 6:30

Uruguay

Racing hosts Wanderers – 6:30

Argentina

Talleres (Córdoba) hosts Banfield – 7:30

Sarmiento (Junín) hosts River Plate – 7:30

Sarmiento is the last name of a most humorless man: XIXth Century’s Domingo Faustino Sarmiento—educator, minister, president, sourpuss. Sarmiento opened Argentina’s borders to Germans and other northern Europs. However, Argentina wound up with half of Italy, to Sarmiento’s personal dismay. But that was to be expected: Argentina’s thing is having clear instructions and ignoring them at will, whether it’s fútbol laws or immigration quotas.

Land of Contrasts! “Sarmiento” means grapevine in Spanish. And, Club Atlético Sarmiento plays in Estadio Eva Perón, named of course for a very, very fun first lady. Wine and party vibes, great counterpoint to a public life of stern gazes:

Via enlace

Chile

Magallanes hosts Universidad Católica – 6:30

Unión Española hosts Palestino – 6:30

Games between these two teams is called El Clásico de Colonias, named teams that represent the biggest immigrant communities in Chile: Unión Española for the Spanish, Palestino for the bulldozed mercilessly.

Paraguay

Trinidense hosts Guaraní – 6:30

At a New York Review of Books party, Truman Capote once called V.S. Naipul “Trini – dense”, and Roland Barthes replied with a snort and “Behave, Bulldog. Fetch”, gesturing towards martinis.

Ecuador

Emelec hosts Técnico Universitario – 7:00

Colombia

Independiente Medellín hosts Jaguares de Córdoba – 8:00

FINALLY, its the WBC:

Cuba @ U.S.A., 6:00 in Miami!

Miami, of course, has a huge community of Cuban exiles steadfastly opposed to the Cuban regime. The Cuba Cubans call the exiles gusanos–you know, worms. And, traditionally, Miami Cuban have been pro-embargo and doing whatever it takes to oust the Castroseses. Fortunately, it seems those old cold warriors have been dying and Cuba has been Castro-less for a coupla years now. There’s even major leaguers playing for the Cuba team now, but gotta keep it honest: the only thing that interests me in this game is whether Cubans will root for the U.S.A. against Cuba.

By the way: Puerto Ricans would never. No way. If Puerto Rico is competing, you don’t root for anyone else. I may watch some of this Cuba @ USA game, even though it’s baseball. Have a great week, sickos.