Request Line: Toxins

INT. RECORDING STUDIO – DAY/NIGHT/DAY/NIGHT/DAY/NIGHT/DAY…

DJ 3000 and various other robot entities remain trapped in a time loop inside the KDFO recording studio. A miniaturized DJ 3000 continues to fiddle with a complicated contraption of wires and lenses, while a miniaturized PETUNIA and MAXIMILIAN and regular-sized PED-209 and JIM NANCE 081-RD-92C look on. 

DJ 3000: ALL RIGHT, PETUNIA. THAT’S ENOUGH GAWKING AT CHLOE ALLISTER’S ORCHIDS.

JOHN DIMAGGIO: OW! [slaps arm] Son of a bitch!

PETUNIA: What’s wrong?

JOHN DIMAGGIO: A fucking bee just stung me!

JOHN DIMAGGIO displays his upper arm, where a welt has appeared and is beginning to swell.

PED-209: [advancing menacingly] OH MY THAT IS A SHAME ALL RIGHT WELL LET’S JUST GO AHEAD AND PUT HIM OUT OF HIS MISERY.

PED-209 begins to spin up his syringe miniguns.

JOHN DIMAGGIO: Wait wait wait wait! Jesus, wait!

JOHNNY 2.5: [laughing] SUDDENLY THE GUY WHO’S FAMOUS FOR SAYING “KILL ALL HUMANS” DOESN’T THINK WE SHOULD KILL ANY HUMANS.

JOHN DIMAGGIO: That was just a joke!

PED-209: OF COURSE YOU’RE SAYING THAT NOW THAT YOU’RE IN THE CROSSHAIRS.

JIM NANCE 081-RD-92C: It’s fine, you’ll be good as new when the loop resets.

JOHN DIMAGGIO: Listen, I’m not terribly interested in experiencing death just so I can avoid the discomfort of a bee string for a few hours.

JOHNNY 2.5: DISCOMFORT?

PED-209: YOU’RE NOT DYING?

JOHN DIMAGGIO: No, of course I’m not dying! It’s just a beesting!

PED-209 lets his miniguns spin down. 

PED-209: OH.

JOHNNY 2.5: BUT I THOUGHT HUMANS WERE ALLERGIC TO BEE VENOM.

JOHN DIMAGGIO: Well, I mean, some are.  But I’m not. It’s just going to be sore for the rest of the day.

MAXIMILIAN: INTERESTING…SO WHAT OTHER KINDS OF THINGS ARE HUMANS ALLERGIC TO?

RUSSELL WILSON: Some are allergic to peanuts.

MAXIMILIAN: I SEE, I SEE.  ARE THERE ANY SUBSTANCES THAT ALL HUMANS ARE ALLERGIC TO?

JOHN DIMAGGIO: I guess…but really you’re just talking about poisons at that point.

RUSSELL WILSON: Unless you’re talking about substances that work more slowly, which I guess it’s more appropriate to refer to as “toxins”.

MAXIMILIAN: GOT ANY EXAMPLES?

RUSSELL WILSON: Oh, all kinds of hydrocarbons.  Any chemical with a benzene ring attached is pretty much instant cancer.

JOHNNY 2.5: IS RADIATION A TOXIN?

JOHN DIMAGGIO: I mean radiation is just radiation.  Though I guess any substance that produces radiation would be a toxin.

RQBOCOP: WHAT ABOUT A VAT OF CHEMICALS THAT CAUSE ONE OF YOUR ASSAILANTS TO BEGIN DISSOLVING INTO GOO WHILE STILL SHAMBLING AROUND?

JOHN DIMAGGIO: Yes, that would definitely be a toxin.

MAXIMILIAN: COOL, COOL, WELL THANKS FOR ALL THE IDEAS I MEAN INFORMATION.

DJ 3000: [taps clock display] HEY GUYS WE’VE GOT A REQUEST LINE TO GET TO, ANYONE GOT A TOPIC?

MAXIMILIAN: LET’S DO TOXINS!

RUSSELL WILSON: You mean like all the stuff we just talked about?

MAXIMILIAN: YEAH. PLUS THE ANIMALS THAT PRODUCE THEM, LIKE SNAKES AND SCORPIONS AND STUFF.

DJ 3000: WORKS FOR ME.

JOHN DIMAGGIO: Hey, wait.  How did that bee get in here…?

Today’s theme is “toxins”.  We’re looking for songs about substances (or the things that produce those substances) that are toxic to humans. Poison, venom, radiation, go wild.  This might be a thin topic so band names are fine, too.  Post links as “https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c0rPr!5iN6 and they should embed in the comments after you refresh.  Last week’s puzzle answer was “Anyone Can Play Guitar” by the Radiohead, making it two in a row for SonOfSpam.  Let’s get to it!

5 2 votes
Article Rating
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Law-abiding Raiders fan, pet owner, Los Angeles resident.
Subscribe
Notify of
152 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
BeefReeferLives

One more. Was listening to this, and thought that a Bitches Brew must be pretty toxic.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=50fB5L1vmn8

ballsofsteelandfury
BeefReeferLives

Last one. Thanks for the fun, RTD!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=duPiV_T2INE

BeefReeferLives
BeefReeferLives

Formic acid is definitely toxic.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fB-hpewwEiY

BeefReeferLives
BeefReeferLives
DJ TAJ

GG is gods favorite singer

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wMtzbdeqrcw

BeefReeferLives
BeefReeferLives
BeefReeferLives
BeefReeferLives
BeefReeferLives
DJ TAJ

Might be a stretch but a cool tune

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JBANWpzsHts

BeefReeferLives
BeefReeferLives

“You mixed my drinks with a can of Red Devil Lye
Then you sit down, watch me, hopin’ that I might die”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VpQVjiQAHS8

BeefReeferLives
DJ TAJ

Good choice

BeefReeferLives
DJ TAJ

You can pretty much play any song from their library.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K0voqcZOPws

BeefReeferLives
DJ TAJ

The best band ever? I say God Damn close

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ghuJgD0J9Kg

BeefReeferLives
DJ TAJ
DJ TAJ

Daryl Hall yes the same from Hall and Oats on vocals

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hK6CroZ4-YM

BeefReeferLives

Seen any of “Live from Dayrl’s House”? Some cool performers come on and tear it up. Like this, fer example:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=efB3aQkZS1g

DJ TAJ

I don’t think so, but I’m usually high as fuck

BeefReeferLives

Glad to hear it. Best way to enjoy ol Joe kicking out the jams.

BeefReeferLives
BeefReeferLives
Doktor Zymm

Can’t believe Leadbelly is still on the table
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pLQdWCIev00

Doktor Zymm

Bonus content via Wikipedia: Lead Belly possibly has the first recorded instance of the word “woke.” In explaining to The Smithsonian Folkways Collection why he wrote the song “Scottsboro Boys,” about the nine African American young men falsely accused of raping two white women in Alabama in 1931, Lead Belly admonishes his listeners, “Best stay woke!”

scotchnaut

As a band (I think an ex-live commenter liked them) Fallout Boy should qualify. Here is the worst song title I could find and believe me, there were tons to choose from. I give you, “Champagne for my Real Friends, Real Pain for my Sham Friends”.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_txiRmH8NDY&ab_channel=FallOutBoy-Topic

Horatio Cornblower

Dude.

/obligatory

BeefReeferLives
scotchnaut

Hey mushrooms can be toxic and so is radiation. I got yer two fer one right here.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u1pS2xw3FI4&ab_channel=riserecords

BeefReeferLives
Don T

May the Blair Witch bless me–fer ur seik!
System – Toxicity
https://youtu.be/iywaBOMvYLI

BeefReeferLives
BeefReeferLives
Don T

🎶Toooóxica, tóxicaaaa, princesa, de la químicaaa. Toooóxica, tóxicaaaa. Superacción, la solución🎶
Babasónicos – Tóxica

https://youtu.be/maRga4FSvi8

And yes. Can relate–both ways! Zero misgivings ’bout toxicity
[Control F]

Last edited 1 year ago by Don T
BeefReeferLives
scotchnaut

Hey, got a bonus for you. Ted Nugent is toxic for humans!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DeyAaJt2408&ab_channel=MahoganyRecords

BeefReeferLives

& is the poster child for toxic masculinity.

Self contained triple shot!!

BeefReeferLives
BeefReeferLives
BeefReeferLives
BeefReeferLives
WCS
Sharkbait

Dope is slang for drugs so it counts!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PIe-E4cCMnU

Horatio Cornblower

Fish can be toxic if not prepared properly.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OEo2qZpaep0

Also I saw Ms. Fish live last night and if you like scorching blues I highly recommend checking her out if she’s touring near you.

BeefReeferLives

So can oysters. Especially the illegal ones.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZpRSp4TJmfE

Horatio Cornblower

Fuck, now I want a margarita or two and a couple of dozen oysters.

My wife’s gonna have your legs broke.