11/11 JV NVL Night Thread

Treasure these full sportsball days while we got ’em, y’all.  Plenty of good shit, once again.

Ballsy: Speaking of, I highly recommend Metamucil.

Ole Miss (+10.5) at Georgia (7:00, ESPN)

Jawja sure is living right.  They have tough games on their schedule, just every one (except next week’s trip to Knoxville) is between the hedges.  Very difficult to beat Kirby Smart there.  This one should be fairly competitive, though.

Ballsy: Their school system may be bottom of the barrel, but they do have good looking ladies…

West By God Virginia (+13) at Okiehoma (7:00, Fox)

I’m pilled up enough to call my shot – Fuckers du Cousins get the JERB DUN against Steerfuckers North.  I like it when schizo fan bases get some extreme highs and lows, and Boomer Sooner would qualify with a loss here.

Ballsy: This lovely lady races dirt cars!

Texas (-10) at TCU (7:30, ABC)

I really, REALLY wish I was feeling this one, but alas – this group of Steerfuckers survive easily.  A bit of Second Season Syndrome for Sonny Dykes’ Bloodeyes.

Ballsy: You’ve got to love the expressions on their faces!

Florida (+13.5) at LSU (7:30, SECN)

I sense danger for Brian Kelly’s Cajuns here, but it’s probably just swamp gas.  Baton Rouge’s night environment is second to none, however.

Ballsy: When will Florida Woman be a thing? Equal opportunity y’all!

Southern Cal (+15) at Oregon (10:30, Fox)

Do Caleb and Palz have enough pride to make a game out of this?  Whatever the “over” is, deffo not high enough.  This is going to be Tweaker Pinball.

Ballsy: Wet USC Song Girls for the Hippo!

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King Hippo
Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan. Also a proud fookin' Evertonian. Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child. [Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
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blaxabbath

Given his profile, what would be the best plan to get a letter to Tarrio that he’d actually read? Sure, he’ll stop after one sentence (also need help writing that); I’m asking about the logistics of getting him mail. Looks like a fun project.

https://www.justice.gov/usao-dc/pr/two-leaders-proud-boys-sentenced-prison-seditious-conspiracy-and-other-charges-related-us

blaxabbath

Goddamn. These chicks on Supermarket Sweep just got $1,332 on the Sweep. That chick got like all the bonuses (plus her inflatable bonus was the Mega).

Then on the Bonus Game, they were just like slow but got the 5th Ave Bar in time so they ended up with $6,332. I think that’s the biggest win I’ve ever seen on the Sweep. The only bonus where they didn’t get maxed out was the recycling bonus (and this episode didn’t have a Manager’s Special).

WCS
Mr. Ayo

Just got home, and let me say. I straight up did not have a good time. To the freezer vodka!

Horatio Cornblower

We must protect Mr. & Mrs. Bill Burr at all costs

https://twitter.com/search?q=%22Bill%20Burr%22&src=trend_click&vertical=trends

Not the UFC, however. Holy Christ as that become a complete joke.

jjfozz

i can’t get dwon with the UFC. gimme boxing, just like i watched with mmy garadnfather. those gusywerew machines.

Horatio Cornblower

Love boxing, love MMA, hate UFC because it’s fucking up both.

There’s ‘rigged’ in boxing and then there’s “whatever the hell Dana White wants to do in UFC”

Doktor Zymm

Ali studied a lot of the same martial arts, the float like a butterfly bit was all from Fillipino footwork. The fights in UFC are impressive, and I know they gotta have a lot of discipline to do what they do, but weirdly I think it’s how it’s marketed. Extra weird when you consider how boxing is marketed, but yeah, I think they try to sell it stupidly, and then the stories these guys have are different too, they’re mostly pretty well-heeled dudes who can afford to train with top guys while boxing has always been more of discovering kids who work hards

2Pack

A Buddy of mine was a recruiter in Philly. Mike Tyson walked into his office one day. Did not exactly ace the ASFAB test so sadly the Army lost out on Mike’s service. And the rest as they say…

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Had the displeasure of pulling up on Amtrak as MSG let out from that fight. Judging by the crowd, fuck em all.

Doktor Zymm

Assuming they have passed out into sweet dreamhood, goodnight to our east coast contingent

Horatio Cornblower

Still up.

Definitely need to either go to bed or drink more, and the latter seems like a the definition of declining returns.

I suspect at least a 6-7 hour “nap” is in order. Might stretch out in the basement, as I suspect the cat won’t think to look for me there at 5:43 am. That handsome furry bastard.

Last edited 5 months ago by Horatio Cornblower
Doktor Zymm

Enjoy your weird nighttime nap and tell your cat I said hi!

Horatio Cornblower

“input is too short”

Boy, if I had a dollar…

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Gumbygirl

Cats, man.

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WCS

I’m here all night.

Doktor Zymm

Like a diner waitress but without the horrible coffee or meth addicted boyfriend (I’m assuming)

WCS

It can be several things!

Horatio Cornblower

DOUGHNUTS!!!!!

jjfozz

noafcuk. dammit. no fuck ia m here, had to tatek the Fozz Beast for a walk. craz animal.

Doktor Zymm

Youre good to an animal you didn’t really want, that’s you being an awesome person right there

blaxabbath

Is there a game being watched?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

The game of life, my friend.

Doktor Zymm

You can be a winner at the game of Life!

jjfozz

i have roled the dice in the game of life and they fwent erigh the fuck off the gable table

Doktor Zymm

That’s a mulligan in Vegas, too many ways to cheat once they’re off the table

Doktor Zymm

I heard they redid Life to fit closer to modern norms, like reduced the advantage for having lots of kids and stuff like that. Would be interesting to play the new version, although if it was actually successful at indoctrintion they wouldn’t have had to make a new version

Horatio Cornblower

Does that include the rise and fall of ancient Atlantis in my naval?

Because if so, yes.

Doktor Zymm

So you have seamen in your naval?

Horatio Cornblower

I refuse to answer that question on the advice of counsel.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Lowratio, Esq..

jjfozz

hewas coming harda dn fast

Horatio Cornblower

This might be what the first girl who consented to take my virginity said, but I’m far from positive.

I am certain that she was disappointed.

jjfozz

solom bird jsut got his ears pinned back by a verry large samon

jjfozz

he may not be samoan, that’s on me, bt whotever that guy was, he was fuckinng mad

jjfozz

the youngest gozz, the kid who keep sme sane
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Doktor Zymm

Mouse is either in the wall or my filthy neighbors (who I’m calling filthy because they put their goddamn trash out in from of their apartment door for hours or days instead of taking it to the freaking dumpsters like non-filthy people do and then they wonder why there are flies all around the doors gee I wonder what they could be attracted to??) are even more filthy than I thought and who knows what’s making that noise

jjfozz

you take that rsasth, and thrwo it HARD agasint their door and fuckng tell them they can call me

Horatio Cornblower

Never underestimate the cleansing power of fire.

Doktor Zymm

We’re in the same building, I need something more like a plasma cutter than just normal fire

jjfozz

gotta go gladiator on they asses

jjfozz

CANT STOP WONT STOP
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Doktor Zymm

Are the O’s the longest drought in the MLB since the Cubs win?

jjfozz

mmnah we weon in 83

Doktor Zymm

When I was 2! Still an O’s fan since the Nat’s didn’t exist till I was much older. Sang the national anthem at Camden Yards when I was 8 maybe, along with the rest of my school chorus. We weren’t allowed to stay till the end of the game, but I do remember a lot of women thought Brady Anderson had a great ass

jjfozz

brady anderson got moer ass than a woman’s toilet seat

Doktor Zymm

Truff

Horatio Cornblower

Indians, I believe.

Doktor Zymm

Oh, appropriate because Cleveland can’t have nice things, instead they have the Browns and the Indians

And the Cuyahoga river

Last edited 5 months ago by Doktor Zymm
Senor Weaselo

That would be the Cleveland Naps (1948)

Last edited 5 months ago by Senor Weaselo
Doktor Zymm

Man, wish Fozz, Horatio, anyone else here who’s very drunk, and myself were in a bar right now. I could use some poor advice that no one will remember in the morning

jjfozz

cuk theat would be like, thwe cnete rof ht euniverse for bad decisions.

here’s my advice: do it

Doktor Zymm

Already have! Just want reasons to keep doing it! Doesn’t seem like it can go wrong for me, just for people that I either don’t know or are assholes. Still kinda shitty, but fuck it, I’m having fun and saints seem like boring fucks that no one wants around anyway

Horatio Cornblower

Sheep go to Heaven, goats go to Hell.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eYxs4esLI_E

This counts as advice, (terrible, terrible advice), at this point in the evening.

Doktor Zymm

I’m more like a raccoon I think, I have opposable thumbs on my tiny hands, look great in stripes, and will fuck you up if you mess with my trash

Horatio Cornblower

Got you covered.

Bad advice aplenty here!