Treasure these full sportsball days while we got ’em, y’all. Plenty of good shit, once again.
Ballsy: Speaking of, I highly recommend Metamucil.
Ole Miss (+10.5) at Georgia (7:00, ESPN)
Jawja sure is living right. They have tough games on their schedule, just every one (except next week’s trip to Knoxville) is between the hedges. Very difficult to beat Kirby Smart there. This one should be fairly competitive, though.
Ballsy: Their school system may be bottom of the barrel, but they do have good looking ladies…
West By God Virginia (+13) at Okiehoma (7:00, Fox)
I’m pilled up enough to call my shot – Fuckers du Cousins get the JERB DUN against Steerfuckers North. I like it when schizo fan bases get some extreme highs and lows, and Boomer Sooner would qualify with a loss here.
Ballsy: This lovely lady races dirt cars!
Texas (-10) at TCU (7:30, ABC)
I really, REALLY wish I was feeling this one, but alas – this group of Steerfuckers survive easily. A bit of Second Season Syndrome for Sonny Dykes’ Bloodeyes.
Ballsy: You’ve got to love the expressions on their faces!
Florida (+13.5) at LSU (7:30, SECN)
I sense danger for Brian Kelly’s Cajuns here, but it’s probably just swamp gas. Baton Rouge’s night environment is second to none, however.
Ballsy: When will Florida Woman be a thing? Equal opportunity y’all!
Southern Cal (+15) at Oregon (10:30, Fox)
Do Caleb and Palz have enough pride to make a game out of this? Whatever the “over” is, deffo not high enough. This is going to be Tweaker Pinball.
Ballsy: Wet USC Song Girls for the Hippo!
afsdljkasdfljkafds
blaargh! this me is me
insdie of my mnd: maybenot druink
my real mind: find those guys, you need to get more bourron.
Sir, I will have you now that that is an unedited reported and that IU mam hammered on the finest Northeast IPAs and various variations of the IPAs that can be found.
Jesus Christ, I am really glad I’ve edited everything else.
https://loveyourmindtoday.org/
heemm
hmmmmm
https://www.merriam-webster.com/wordplay/where-does-the-phrase-up-to-snuff-come-from-word-history-definition
snuff!
I used to chew strong peppermint gum in classes I didn’t like because it made me sneeze for minutes on end but they couldn’t say shit about me being disruptive because it’s sneezing and you can’t fake it
You have some serious sustain on your sneezing fits.
I’m nothing now compared to when I was a kid. One summer I would sneeze whenever I got out of a cholrinated pool, consistently enough that I was able to count. I no longer remember to exact number, but it was over 300.
The peppermint class sneezes were nowhere near than, more in the 15 – 20 range but that’s plenty yo be disruptive. Nowadays I sometimes only sneeze once, which is just crazy. Usually more like 3-5 though.
cwobys ginats gmae oc ht eweek? more like gam ein my fucking pants
Worst. Gravy. Sauce. Ever.
First, fuck pants. Second, anything in anyone’s pants will probably be better than that game
/Watching ‘The Great Escape’ while hammered
Man, I really hope Steve McQueen win s WWII.
I hope you don’t mind a mild spoiler, but I heard a rumor that the Germans were up to some bad stuff and didn’t do great towards the end
steve mqeuene fucked them up! true story.
He did actually serve in the military which is pretty unusual for actors in war movies
Cooler! Cooker kind! what afcuk of a movie
Yesterday we watched Cross of Iron and hoo boy was that not good. We watched battle of the bulge today and that was better.
Oh yeah, I watched the last hour of the Dirty Dozen!
So Charles Bronson and Telli Savales were in like every war movie in the 60’s?
tha was a fucking swate sweet drive by USC, the balls on these kids! (i’m not looking at their balls, no homoe)
You can look at their balls all you want, it’s only the shaft that matters
Hey!
A considerate lady will take care of your balls no matter the size, but balls don’t do any penetrating, so not all that important for her pleasure
It’s really more girth than length from what Ive been told.
/continues pen pal relationship with a ‘D. Favre, Hattiesburg, MS’
Sure, but shaft girth and length, no one cares if you have huge balls but you
eer, dear santa, i have been a horrible person this year, we both now that BUT i won’t want to ask for collinsworth to die in a horribl plane wreck. not this eyar.
can you make it so the fucking chiefs crater so hard that we need a new planet?
cause i hate the chiefss
The plane carrying collingsworth could crash into a chiefs practice… Why nawt ask for it all
Birthday Fozz seems fun.
ah, i’m shavin fun solo. mrsfozz and me did the beat wieth two backs yestreday, dinner otnight with my best friend, so i’m solo now and drinking bourone with the dog.
Translation: (while drunk, to be clear). Fozz had sex either on or near his birthday, (with Mrs. Fozz), so all his now clear, and he his currently enjoying along time in the vicinity of a faithful canine companion in which to enjoy various bourbons.’
Local news and weather to follow at 11.
shazam!
We should take him out next year, I will buy him sooo many shots he won’t remember (and I won’t either until I check my cc transactions)
i’ve been talking about a east coast meetup for a longtime, it would be sweett
Motherfucker, we were literally in your backyard last July.
i’m rewatching east bound and down casue kenny powers is my spirrit animal
people who atlak about the podcast they’re currently listening to, shoudl be punched in the liver
does oregan just say, fuck it, adn pick whatever the fuck they wanna wear per game?
Nah man.
Nike chooses that shit.
i liek it, kind of casue it’s a fuck you tot he ncaa, who is owned by every corporated fuckfacse shit out there. shill. not shit.
whoa! i’m sober enough kinad for hte oreon game?
Probably, no need to be sober for some shitty state that’s just misspelled oregano anyway
I am absolutely not.
Hang on for my well reasoned opinions about Dallas’s options at 2nd and 2rd WR, and peace in the Middle East!
Cee Dee Lamb as the solution for both?
if he goes over there, i’m going. i got a pump remintgton shotgun, i’ll take the plug out, load up 8 sheels and rock n fuckng roll!
my Jewsih friends on FB are reallyharing right now. i get it. i feel sorry for the innocents, but i’m waaay pro Israel.
i took my fuckehad dog to the vet today, for two hours! holy cow what a circuis.
Is the dog ok? The dumbass here survived her chocolate misadventure, that was a fucking relief!
she dug a sore near her ear, because she’s going to have ear problems her whole life, it was a complete fuckin scircus circus.
Cone of shame forever!
ohiostate can eat a dsteak made of shit
fuck you starbusck and that bullshit holiday fauz fuckin cups. really ? youcsrhi shitball coffee ameks the tholidays beeter?
god, fuck off
I made ithrouh the french restaurant. had duck. fucking awesome. had a lot of drinks. awesomer
who’sd ogin what?
Can’t go wrong with duck.
Lovely medium rare breast meat with a red wine reduction and a little pan sauce?
Ovah heah!
very good, skin was perfect, and i can be a dcuk guy. no problem.
Yes please!
It’s good stuff. They are some fatass birds, made duck breasts once and poured off a quart of fat from 2 breasts. And I didn’t even render enough out to get them crispy!
Not a huge fan of duck. Very cense meat, doesn’t seem to be much return on it.
…and now there’s full-blown fight in Norman.
I thought they invaded England, not the other way around.
I assumed they were fighting in the Norman language? Hm, I wonder if the word ‘language’ comes from Norman French? It seems like it might!
Semantics.
This Arizona St. Offense I call it my septum because it’s formation is fucked UP.
Hey.
That big Colorado victory over TCU to open the season maybe ain’t so big now.
Joe Montana saying that Guinness encourage moderation so as to respect the people around you would probably be pretty ironic to Lord Mountcastle.
I blame the people around me for nawt being respectable!
Haven’t seen someone screw up a route that bad since PFC Jessica Lynch convoyed through Baghdad.
Folks.
I am well beyond the legal limit to drive, (everyone say “hi” to Mrs. Horatio, who does not drink but who is high AF), and back from the 60th birthday party for a friend who survived a significant heart attack. Many toasts were made. Almost as many as edits as I’ve made to this comment.
UConn lost 44-6 to something called James Madison at football, while whipping wholesale ass in basketball, but while likely torpedo the basketball programs, (men’s and women’s, 16 championships combined), so that it can lose $10 million a year instead of $40 million a year because of football.
I’d ask to make it make sense, but nothing does.
UConn needs to just drop football and turn that stadium in East Hartford, (roughly 40 minutes from the main campus), into a concert venue.
“60 year olds need not have opinions on such long-term matters of which their audience participation is a low value minority.
Even if they are right.
#MAGA”
-Sill Bimmons
There are no scenarios where anyone over the age of 75 should have a say in any vote that affects anything more than 10 years into the future.
Bring any Founding Father you want: I’ll fight them to the death on this.
/because I’m 6’3″ and 215 lbs, you see.
Ah yes, I can see how your ability to beat up elderly people gives you authority
We’re only human.
Well yes, I will whip wholesale ass in a fight against Chuck Schumer, but that’s really not the point. Chuck Schumer doesn’t;t give fuck 1 about what happens in 2050, because Chuck Schumer is never going to see 2050. So Chuck Schumer can fuck right off and retire, and maybe let people with skin in the game discuss what will and what won’t affect people who will be alive then .
I’ll probably be alive then (not trying to jinx it here) but I’ve met a lot of older people who have way more skin in the game re:the future than I do. I don’t have kids, so should I be disqualified from office because my interests are less likely to exceed my lifespan than people who do? You can’t run a government that way, there are plenty of people who care about the future and plenty who don’t, totally independent of measures like age
Age matters.
I would put it maybe 20th on a list of stuff that matters for public office holders. When it becomes and article of contentions it’s generally because the first 19 things are fine.
GTG I HEAR MOUSE NOISES GONNA GET THAT FUCKER
I think I accidentally scared it off before I could crush it with a kettlebell. Apparently clinking bottles together with my fingers and chanting ‘mousies, cone out and playayay’ did NAWT work as intended
Get that mouse, Zymm.
God knows the effort alone would have killed Dianne Feinstein.
Mental health is different than age. She was unfit and people in the party knew it long before, but she was still able to run and win just because of name recognition. Shitty situation but not easy to deal with.
If i was that WR I’d fucking lay in to that QB. I ain’t racing 60 feet to get overthrown.
60 feet is only 20 yards, that’s nowt even long enough for them to make it a sprinting track event
I know what I said!
Football talking guy: “Well sure [Harrison’s] the best player in college football but it’ll be tough for him to win the Heisman (an award given to the best player in college football)”
Makes sense to me!
There’s a fella who knows what it means to compete.
What are his melanin levels?
Is he a punter?
Thanks for your service, Gen Michael Flynn!
Train hasn’t left yet and we’re two “do you know in the quiet car” admonishments administered to nearby passengers.
Neither needing to be to or by me.
You should very pointedly put on Depeche Mode’s “Enjoy the Silence”
At fulll volume of course
I respect the quiet car.
And the sun.
What is the big deal? I bet all the cars are quiet after the engine derails and the passenger vehicles carom down the side of the embankment into the whatever — “East”, I guess — River.
I’ve had like 8 beers tonight. Let me know where the next stop is and I’ll show up and let that person know whether or not I know I’m in the quiet car.
I will also vomit, so you’re probably not gonna wanna be in the quiet car when I show up.
This Ole Miss defense I call it my shower drain because it is UNEXPECTEDLY backing things up.
Although I do feel that by your early 20s you should have enough life experience to expect shower drains to back up
My fault for dating so many women I meet at the souvlaki bar I guess
Very progressive of you to let them snake your drains, usually it’s the other way round
The CFL has a GREAT rule where the coach can challenge the lack of a penalty. Even though I’m rooting for the Liouns, they just committed an obvious PI and the refs missed it.
The coach challenged, won, they got the penalty, and it’s pretty much game over
Logical!
False start, on the first ten passengers trying to board the train before Amtrak personnel gave the green light. 5 yard penalty, repeat waiting.
I hope you glared at them while throwing your microsoft surface to the ground
I came to the dogpark and this is a much better use of my time than laying on the couch watching football.
I’m really special. THANKSSSSSSS
Honoring the troops by Releasing The Kraken!
I had a dream about kraken sushi and the Tsukiji fish market
I trust it was a good time and everything tasted excellent
It was quite confusing, but probably yes!
WVU scored on their first and last drives of the half!
Oh lawd, I just saw that Michigan coach bawling like a big fat baby, I lol’d!
It’s not looking good for the Liouns…
Anyone on the Peter King schedule tonight (non Acela edition)?
Quiet Car rules.
A new bathrobe is not a full member of my collection until it has gotten it’s first stain. Usually red wine or olive oil, though other stains are also accepted
Cheetos dust.
I hope you mean Cheezies dust
The blood of your enemies might leave evidence. Best to order 2 more robes and burn the ones you have.
I take the precaution of donning one of those cheap plastic ponchos before dispatching my enemies. Or I use a bloodless technique like goat tying. No reason to waste a good robe while removing waste from society!
You need to take your disposal expertise out to the West Coast. They need some help with it out there.
https://www.nbclosangeles.com/news/local/day-laborers-hired-by-tarzana-murder-suspect-to-move-body-parts-human-remains-encino/3266061/
tl;dr day laborers find bodies in bags they were supposed to move. They went to the local CHP barracks, and the CHP pawned them off to the LAPD down the street. The LAPD told then to go back outside and call 911. Thin Blue Line in action.
Fuck the police, and the highway patrol apparently (although that’s nawt as catchy for a rap song) No one should get a runaround when reporting the finding of remains
I am not looking that up.
Don’t. It’s a Sicilian mob thing and they aren’t noted for their kindness so that’s enough to know
This Ole Miss defense I call it Newton’s Second Law because it is ALLOWING things to remain in motion
This Ole Miss defense I call it speed limit signs in Athens, GA because it’s having NO effect
This Ole Miss defense I call it the levees in New Orleans because it’s not stopping ANYTHING
Oh, and did y’all hear about T.O. getting hit by a car after an argument with some dude? He was totally fine
https://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/38872025/ex-nfl-cb-dj-hayden-6-killed-houston-car-accident
Saw this.
Well that is just an entire illegal left turn into depressing town
Here’s a counter:
https://www.vibe.com/news/entertainment/chad-johnson-terrell-owens-orgy-12-hour-17-woman-1234811425/
Big girls need love too
Speaking of TO, with all the outpouring about Matthew Perry dying, how come there wasn’t more love for his work in Go On? That show was excellent and deserved more seasons.
(it’s related because TO was in the pilot and came back as an intern on the radio show later)
I was not even aware of that show, but I am unaware of many popular shows so that means exactly nothing
It wasn’t popular, hence it only getting one season. But *I* liked it.
Happy Singles Day (aka Asia’s version of Prime Day)! Hope you were all able to grab a few deals from Wish or Baidu or wherever!
Mouse update: I did find a few more turds today, but they were in places I didn’t check yesterday so probably aren’t new. Still gonna swing by a hardware store or something tomorrow and get some traps for under the sink
WCS, pls tell your Cousinfuckers to DUE BETTER their making Hippo look dum smgdh
this game JUST MEENS MAOR to Sooners
Boots on the ground in Honolulu. It’s weird having the night thread up at 3 in the afternoon
Tell Coach Prime to take that weak shit back to the BET Conference. Scoreboard.
https://twitter.com/ArizonaFBall/status/1723468395364986887?ref_src=twsrc%5Egoogle%7Ctwcamp%5Eserp%7Ctwgr%5Etweet
Arizona’s joining the biG 21, too.
CFL West final is on, crazy game so far but not like the East final
Just reside yinzselves to Bama-Jawja twice in the next six weeks.
it wud b good 4 AMERICA wut say yew PAAAWWWLLLLL?
What’s with the Texas girls “got milk” upper lips?
Those two look like black widows ready to devour their next victim. C’mere, boy!
https://theathletic.com/4991016/2023/10/24/caleb-love-arizona-basketball/?amp=1
For anyone wanting a little good times college coaching read that contributed to EAT SHIT DUKE!
Can’t believe it lasted this long and would imagine it will be picked again but I’ll take the Blair Witch Project. Old camera and some hiking gear, maybe a bundle of sticks and you’ve got a costume you could repeat forever.
Go Mountaineers
Is it Groundhog Day already?