Your College Basketball Open Thread

It could also operate as the evening thread-I’ve no clue what the higher-ups have planned.

To The Games!

Col/Marq:

Both teams have basically the same record but I expect the latter to win handily based on the theory that I’ve held for decades-that West Coast basketball is garbage. I believe this because USC, UCLA, Gonzaga and the rest of them. Hell, that last team should have two championships by now but teams out there have made folding in the crunch an artform. They’re certainly no solid, white bread, sturdy, dependable, fly-over program like the Golden Eagles.

Utah St./Purdue:

Do the Aggies have a 7 footer? As soon as Edey is somewhat nullified by a guy near his size the Boilermakers are done for. So Utah does in fact employ a big fella but he only plays 15 minutes a game. That ugly galoot gets another pass I guess.

Clemson/Baylor:

Joe Girard gets the last laugh. The transfer from Sillycuse is playing his second tourney game while his old team couldn’t field enough quality guys to participate in the group hug that is the pathetic NIT.

James Madison/Duke:

TODAY WE ARE ALL AUTHORS OF THE FEDERALIST PAPERS! No, not John Jay, the other guy.

Grand Canyon/Bama:

Anyone know anything about the Fightin’ Antelopes? As them are prey animals with a herd mentality, I don’t like their chances.

Northwestern/UCONN:

Methinks a bunch of pasty white fellas can get back to their homework after they get obliterated. (stereotypes are fun!) Danny Hurley’s Throbbing Temple Vein wants blood.

Texas A&M/Houston:

Another Aggie team? This isn’t the CFL of old, this is proto-professional basketball! The Cougars are undefeated in non-conference play and are 17-4 vs teams above .500. Let the stomping commence.

Yale/San Diego State:

Another “Egghead Loves His Booky-Book” school, as Homer once said. So you’d think they’d be done for but lo!, their opponent the Aztecs lost to the hot shooting of Hernan Cortez and a few of his buddies a little while ago. But also, they’re a shitty West Coast basketball squadoo. See how I came full circle there? In film circles that’s called a rhyming technique. Cool, huh? Nope? Well, I tried. Not hard though.

Enjoy the games.