Ok, we won’t go into ‘Horatio climbs mountains’ again, because frankly two mentions on consecutive days is probably one mention too much.  But I did in fact spend a lot of time outdoors today going uphill, (it’s pretty funny seeing my Fitness Calculator just fucking spin at how many calories it thinks I burned), and even more time driving too and from said outdoor activity.

A person might logically ask why I didn’t just camp out overnight, maybe do some more hiking, and spread the driving out.  And to them I would say “Piss off.  I am 55 years old and have enough issues sleeping.  I do not need to add ‘hike 12 hours, then build your temporary bedroom before ‘cooking’ your own ‘dinner’ which will taste like paste no matter what’ to that equation.  Once upon a time I did indeed camp.  Now I will happily hike, so long as I can make my base of operations a hotel, or drive home and sleep in my own bed.  I will leave the sleeping outdoors in flimsy shelters to the experts like Jim Tomsula.

And what do we need on long drives?  We need road-trip music!  There’s no such thing as a fun time in the car on a long trip without good tunes.  Trust me, I just spent the better part of 2 hours listening to the Yankees lose 3-0 to the Red Sox.  I would much rather have put on the radio and bopped along with the dulcet tones of Hanson, or something.

I have two top choices here, but I’m going to take a chance on the more well-known one and hope to snag my second, (which I like better, but this is Kevin Costner-level draft strategy I’m doing here), later.  With my first pick I will take Golden Earring’s ‘Radar Love’.  It checks all the boxes:  concerns long trips, (bonus, at night!), it kicks ass, and there’s no way you’re not listening to it and keeping the beat with the flat of your hands against the steering wheel.

Keep in mind, however, that this is not Friday’s Request Line.  There are no rules or themes or puzzles I never understand.  If you feel like a particular song helps you get through a road trip, you go right ahead and take it.

The rest of you are on the clock.