Well lookee here, a staggered slate for us to enjoy! And after that 5 game late window yesterday. Is the NFL finally treating its fans with the respect and dignity they deserve? (well, some fans) Probably not. I heard a wag complaining that it wasn’t a doubleheader but this old man would only want one if the first tilt started at 6pm EST. Some people work for a living you know. Btw, we get the same deal next Monday as well.
Fallout:
–[Jim Mora voice] MVP! MVP?: As a funny little lark I was going to make a crack about getting your bets in early regarding Sam Darnold being MVP and then thought, “I’ll look it up just in case”. Welp, his odds fell from 100-1 down to 35-1. I’m so glad I don’t gamble.
–Billionaire Braggadocio: Arthur Blank put himself in the Falcons Ring of Honor and I can’t blame him. What the hell else is an 81 year-old worth 9 or so billion bucks going to do? He DGAF and neither do I.
–Get The Hook: Anthony Richardson and his 49% completion rate just might get the Bryce Young Treatment if his play doesn’t improve. With a loss to Pitt coming up next week and Houston looking meh this week and the division looking sorta winnable, I’m sure coaches wouldn’t mind a Flacco Bump.
–Put on the Brakes: The Saints tore through their first two opponents, putting up 40+ points on each. But I noted that they were doing it with vanilla offensive sets, rarely going to three wr’s. Well what did Philly do? They threw six guys on the line of scrimmage with just one linebacker back in support. And OC Klint Kubiak had no answer and 12 points to show for it.
To The Games!
Jax/Bills:
-Lawrence isn’t doing much better than A-Rich, completing only 51% of his throws so far but he’s been missing the safety valve that is Evan Engram and taking shots downfield at rook Brian Thomas Jr. He’ll recover but it’ll be a bit slow because Engram’s replacements are primarily blocking tight ends, Gabe Davis has hands like The Thing and Kirk is also a deep threat.
-It would be nice if the running game could step up and compensate but Etienne hasn’t run for 60+ yards in 12 of his last 14 games.
-Speaking of issues at the wr spot, Buffalo fans were concerned about the new faces/drop in talent in that room. #fearsjustified Josh Allen is averaging a mere 185.5 passing yards so far. Perhaps they could trade for some malcontent-it worked the last time.
-Here’s a related thought-maybe don’t take your most explosive asset-Khalil Shakur-off the field when you go to two receiver sets.
Commies/Bengals:
-The thinking among some Washington observers was that rook Daniels would lean on the always dependable Scary Terry as he got his feet under him. Well he has, to the tune of 8 grabs for 39 yards. Oof.
-When Burrow throws his first TD against the Commies pitiful secondary he will be the sixth-fastest to 100.
-He’s always been a Sling It! kinda fella and that bears out in that he leads the league with 8 endzone throws already. And seriously, why wouldn’t anybody, you’ve got a 50-50 chance of getting a PI penalty. (does not apply to teams playing the Chiefs)
-There was a concern fantasy-wise that Moss would be slowly replaced by the younger Chase Brown but the former out-snapped the latter 50-11 last week.
-Things look bleak on the surface for Cincy at 0-2 but Cleveland seems to be floundering and the Ravens have but one win so a W here throws them right back into the middle of the mess that is the AFC Muddle, er, North.
Have at you!
So it wasn’t favoritism to the Chefs, after all.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x7XscWqgdzI&list=PLFi9V6EFsFImHKEho5B34IsIM9HHaICOc&index=6
It’s me Friday, I’ve saved some lives this week, the Stillers are simultaneously 3-0, and somehow 1.5 games up in the AFC North.
So here’s a song about overdosing! Great riffs, though.
Reaction from fanbase
One more before I stare into the darkness and slip into madness
Gary smoking a cigarette is the best thing I’ve seen today. And I watched the Bills shitcan the Jags AND the Bungles lose.
The Colts Week 5 @JAX shirts are looking ok.
Dear Sweet Jeebus, we need Andy Reid in one of these yesterday.
His sleepwear is probably that in 6XL
I was going more with 116XL, but hey, maybe the Ozempic’s working for Andy.
Median 23% body weight loss
The water tastes like rusted dirt down there. He was no shit probably getting lead poisoning.
How Joe Burrow gonna be 0-3 and still have hair like the bully kid who is also cool and good at skateboarding?
He’s gonna have to make like a tree and get outta here.
The Bengals Defense couldn’t stop a leaf falling off a tree from hitting the ground.
Doesn’t have to hit the ground…
Is a gravitational-like force literally pulling the [*Redacted] s to the end zone?
Oh, so NOW that’s Pass Interference?
Burrow got me enough points to beat BugEyedBoo AND the Bengals are gonna lose!
Just Gumbygirl. I’m securely holding last place.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4I5ZKp9b0FA
They were damn good in their day.
Saw them along with Billy Squier, Styx, and Diet Foreigner (without Lou Gramm) at a concert in 2001. Fucking GREAT show, even without Gramm.
That was also a few years before “Renegade” became the unofficial Yinzer trash anthem.
Thanks to Terry and Buffalo D, I’m now 0-3 in Freezer Vodka.
“We welcome you to the Lowratio League. Lowatio League. Lowratio League.”
Casa Do Vinho FC at 3-0!
Samesies.
One of you has to improve, we can’t have both commishes relegated. Or if improving doesn’t work out, pull a Ginger Hammer and generously bend to rules to fit your narrative
I need some of that Kansas City plot armor they have
We may have to find a recruiter for a league 1.
They can play Sunderland and Wrexham!
I know what you mean, Dok murdered me this week.
I mean, I’m still 2-1 and in no danger of being relegated, but still.
A couple of banger catches tonight, at least, for this game.