Eastern Conference Playoff Team Previews & Wednesday Open Thread

Beerguyrob

Beerguyrob

A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
Beerguyrob

I’m eschewing NFL News today & tomorrow because nothing important is going on, and the draft is still 15 days away, meaning Cleveland has plenty of time to screw things up.

NHL Notes:

Tonight’s previews cover the teams not already written up by our crack staff of intrepid reporters.

Click here, here and here for those.

Many other teams, however, don’t have stalwart-enough fans on DFO to warrant analysis. So, they get mine.

Montreal Canadiens:

Here’s all you need to know about the Habs:

If Carey Price is off, they’re fucked. They don’t have the scoring or defence to hang long with big-shooting teams. But like the 1986 (or 1993) Canadiens who rode Patrick Roy to an improbable Cup, if he’s hot, they have a long run in them.

FYI: They are called the Habs because people think it means “Habitants”. The “H” comes from when they switched their name from “Club athlétique Canadien” to “Club de hockey Canadien” .

           

According to NHL.com, the first man to refer to the team as “the Habs” was American Tex Rickard, owner of the Madison Square Garden, in 1924. Rickard apparently told a reporter that the “H” on the Canadiens’ sweaters was for “Habitants”.


Boston Bruins:

As sad as it has been to watch the Canucks golf their way down to obscurity again, it’s been equally frustrating watching the Bruins muddle their way to ambiguity. Allow me to remind you about the two minutes that led to their current state:

Some of the core components from the 2011 & 2013 runs are still there. Obviously, Big Z is still anchoring the blueline, and Rask, Marchand & Bergeron still have their roles. But injuries are the key factor in how far they might go. The Bruins start the series short two defensive starters; Torey Krug is so hurt the Bruins signed a kid right out of Boston University and his first professional game will be Game 1 in Ottawa.

Scoring isn’t an issue. The hard part will be breaking through Ottawa’s modified neutral-zone trap.

Once again, Tuukka Rask carried the bulk of the net-minding load, and his 2.25 GAA should give the Bruins a good chance to squeak out the series victory, a series that on paper is the closest matchup of the first round.


Washington Capitals:

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before: “The Capitals have what it takes to go all the way this year.”

The Capitals have always had the offence to go far, but a defence that kept them from doing so. Ovi is Ovi,

but the real force this year was Nicklas Backstrom, who finished the year 18 points above his captain.

On defence, adding Kevin Shattenkirk at the trade deadline bolstered an already strong defence, anchored by probable 2018 Canadian Olympic starting goalie Braden Holtby. (They’re going – the IOC needs the NHL more than the NHL needs the Olympics.)

On every level, stats & regular-season performance dictates this finally has to be Washington’s year.

And yet every year, around late-April, this shot flashes across your TV screen

and you wonder…


Toronto Maple Leafs:

Go away. No one likes you.


Tonight’s sports:

  • NHL:
    • Rangers at Canadiens – 7:00 | NBCSN / CBC
    • Bruins at Senators – 7:00 | NHLN-US / Sportsnet
    • CBJ at Penguins – 7:00 | USA / Sportsnet360
    • Blues at Wild – 9:30 | NBCSN / Sportsnet360
    • Sharks at Oilers – 10:00 | USA / Sportsnet
  • NBA:
    • Hawks at Pacers – 8:00 | ESPN
    • Pelicans at Trail Blazers – 10:30 | ESPN

Next to the first round of March Madness, the Stanley Cup’s first round is the greatest tournament in sports. NO ONE DENIES THIS!

Beerguyrob
Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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litre_cola

Fuck. Beerguy, maestro, scotchy (he about?) Me will all die if Toronto

Senor Weaselo

Evening, lizard people. Who had Tanner Glass getting the first goal of Ice Giants-Ice Alouettes, so I know which one of you are filthy liars?

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

Designated Survivor was a halfway decent show, until someone cocked a pistol and it made the sound of a pump action shotgun.

litre_cola

BGR i can write one tomorrow super hungover for which ever is missing. Message me on slack

litre_cola

High. Kinda drunk. Preggo wife in bed. How is everyone. I have a week to go. I respect you all. How the fuck you doin boys

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Good
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litre_cola

She likes sand.

theeWeeBabySeamus

And it likes her, too.
Looks like chafing waiting to happen, but I’m willing to give it a shot.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Poker

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There’s something especially enticing about Felicity Jones in Rogue One, but I can’t quite put my finger on it.
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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Build Succeeded! Plenty more to do (oh god is there plenty more to do) but for now it’s DRINKIN’ TIME!

WCS

State o’ Hockey ties with with 22 seconds left in regulation.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Down to 12. Not sure whether to push on or call it a night.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Push it. Push it real good.

WCS

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Unsurprised
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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Down to 52 after cheating and commenting a bunch of shit out!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

WE’VE REACHED WASHER CODE BRICK HERE PEOPLE!

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Have you tried Formula 12 Gauge?

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Low Commander of the Super Soldiers
Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Make sure the kitchen appliances get a good look, too. You don’t want them getting uppity.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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This guy retired to Arizona? RIP, bro.
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What’s the point of zipping up that little piece of fabric?
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Apparently, you’re supposed to close the rice cooker lid before it’s been cooking for 35 minutes.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

You used chicken broth instead of water, right?

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I ran out

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Oldest, Fattest, Dumbest President.

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WCS

That’s very elaborate.