Your Skinny Slate Open Thread

Just the both, huh? [prepares yet another rant about scheduling] Bah, never mind!

To The (twin) Games!

Fins/Browns:

-This is the one no one is watching!

-Does anyone regard Miami as a playoff team?

-They’re so meh this year. (I’ve been told that the new word is ‘mid’) My apologies.

-To me there’s a pall over this team because of the extraordinarily brittle state of Tua’s health. Very few folks seemed to have talked about it in a serious fashion at the time and those that did are talking about something else now.

-As far as the playoffs go, the Fins have to do the win out thing and then the usual dance of odd scenarios can take place.

-All that for an embarrassing first round exit. But the year will be seen as a success in some circles.

Packers/Vikes:

-Usually when you hear ‘logjam in the NFC North’ it brings to mind several guys not flushing but this year it’s different.

-What more can you say about the Vikes-even if they lose out (they play the Lions to finish and Campbell-like Parcells-doesn’t strike me as a ‘rest the starters kinda fella) they still get 13 wins that no one expected.

-But what will he do next year without DC Flores? [puts on “Official Tin Foil Hat”] You see, Brian Flores has that lawsuit vs a few teams and their hiring practices hanging in the air. Methinks Goodell is going to grease the wheels and get him a head coach job somewhere, taking the wind out of that suit’s sales.

-yeah right is dancing in his undies. You’re welcome for the visual.

Have at it.

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rockingdog

Also I’ve got Packers WR Reed as my Flex in Fantasy 🏈
If they get him the ball more that would be Rocking! 🙏

Mr. Ayo

It’s the afternoon witching hour!

Catch* the excitement!

*pending video review and further analysis and interpretation of the rulebook

Doktor Zymm

Which is more suspenseful, the 3-score game or the 2-score game where one team is the Browns??

rockingdog

Darnold with his 3rd TD pass!!!! 🏈

That’s Rockingggg!!!

Doktor Zymm

Nice run until dropping the ball!

Doktor Zymm

What’s the record for shortest period of time to waste both challenges?

Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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rockingdog

DARNOLD WITH a 2nd TD pass!!! 🏈

That’s ROCKING!!!!

Mr. Ayo

Wait, is the NFL doing Make a Wish events this weekend?

litre_cola

Dolphins are going to fuck up and make this tight.

litre_cola

Or not.

King Hippo

yeah, teevee off now

litre_cola

Not so fast – Mike McDaniel

Gatoraids

seems brain damage is contagious, maybe Tua invented a new form of Prion

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Normally it’s tongue-in-cheek when I’m complaining about my MiL making fish soup, but whatever she’s making now smells like death in a can. I’m going outside.

Jimbo

Death in can?

Liquid-Death-INSTA-ad-1x1-1-271124768.jpg
litre_cola

You sure she isn’t Icelandic or Norwegian with that death in a can stuff Surstromming?

King Hippo

Football player interviews are the worst television.

litre_cola

Have you watched hockey? Them lads are cementheads.

fleshwound_NPG

get pucks deep

Brick Meathook

These are some of the batteries that I own. Other batteries that I own are not pictured.

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Unsurprised

A fella could have a pretty good time in Philly with that.

Redshirt

Cleveland, when you asked Art Modell to field a championship team, he did exactly what you asked him to do.

Redshirt

Well, I guess my hopes can rely on…oh, come on…welp, we out.

King Hippo

Welcome to Planet Nihilism. It ain’t get no better.

King Hippo

Will to live status – fading.

Jimbo

JImmy Carter?

Doktor Zymm

I guess the rabbit finally got him
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fleshwound_NPG
fleshwound_NPG

NFL Week 18:

tank-super.jpg
litre_cola

Cybertank!

Doktor Zymm

I can’t wait until the boat conversion kit comes out!

King Hippo

They should just cancel everything but MIN at DET.

Jimbo

Cancel culture is out of control. smgdh

ballsofsteelandfury

Nailor?

Don’t even know’er!

litre_cola

I admit. I like when Brady explains real “football speak”.

Brick Meathook

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Redshirt

I don’t think my insults are working. I can’t say much anything that could make Cleveland feel worse.

Doktor Zymm

It might actually be impossible to really insult Cleveland for the same reason it’s impossible to drown a fish

ArmedandHammered

Are you insulting the city, the team, or both?

litre_cola

Man, I hope the Browns win this. We need moar chaos next week!!!!

Doktor Zymm

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Mitch Trubisky posts a PERFECT statline. Oh, you’d better believe some titties are gettin’ kissed tonight.

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Jimbo

Nice

Jimbo

Shut up Brady!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

– Ronald Reagan, regretting having agreed to share the ambulance

Redshirt

The Cleveland Guardians didn’t change their name because it was racist. Indigenous Persons just didn’t want to be associated with Cleveland.

Doktor Zymm

Such a dumb penalty

Redshirt

(sigh) I’m supposed to insult you, Cleveland. You don’t need to insult yourself.

Jimbo

From Reddit

Screenshot 2024-12-29 at 2.03.54 PM.png
ArmedandHammered

Hmm, love that first bong hit of the day!

Jimbo

Woo Vikes!

rockingdog

That was Rockingggg!!! 👏

Also I’ve got Darnold as my QB in Fantasy!

Unsurprised

I have to find anything else to do. This sucks.

SonOfSpam

Glad he passed before the next inauguration.

Jimbo

It might be the last inauguration.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Same here.

Unsurprised

George Washington wouldn’t have sold shit.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That’s not true, he might have sold a slave or two to help fund an inauguration bash.

ArmedandHammered

Been working on the house, so what did I miss? Giants beat the Colts? Don’t see anything else surprising…

litre_cola

Go Birds.

ArmedandHammered

like I said, anything surprising, I just wish I could have watched the game

Brocky

Gentlemen, I am forgoing this Sunday of football activities due to a late Christmas present

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I see a boots on the ground in the future….

rockingdog

That’s Rockingggg!

SonOfSpam

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rockingdog

Found a funny:

incredibly funny that the Jets are gonna finish significantly worse having Rodgers all year than the season they lost him after like 5 minutes

Doktor Zymm

“NO DAYS OFF”
– Doink

litre_cola

The Cowboys kicker hit 3/4’s up the upright from 61. Guy is a cannon.

rockingdog

Also sounds like the Vikings fans are Rocking at home in Minnesota! 💯

Redshirt

Cleveland is so bad, even the Ohio Turnpike swerved south just enough to avoid entering it.

litre_cola

Commercials on both games. Fuck you Goodell!

rockingdog

Packers vs Vikings!
Goooooo Football! 🏈

Hope this game is Rocking!

Unsurprised

I want the Vikings to lose because I want to see the Lions go all the way

rockingdog

That would be ROCKING!

Redshirt

Art Modell…was right!

Unsurprised

Holy shit.

ballsofsteelandfury

Yeah, that’s an insult right there

Unsurprised

Redshirt dropped the nuke early.

Redshirt

Yeah, I blew my wad a bit early there. Trying to manifest an early TD.

Redshirt

Cleveland’s mama’s so bad at sports, her shadow won the race.

Col. Duke LaCross

Greg Gumbel
Jimmy Carter
The Giants chances of drafting Shadeur Sanders

Deaths come in threes.

Redshirt

We lost Carter? Lucky bastard.

Gumbygirl

I’m glad he went while Biden is still the President, so Trump can’t make it all about him. I wouldn’t invite him to the funeral.

Brick Meathook

Speaking of western Pennsylvania, here’s a self-portrait of me (the best kind of self-portrait) in front of Frank Lloyd Wright’s masterpiece Fallingwater house:

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Col. Duke LaCross

So the Bears now have a 99.5% chance of hiring Gus Bradley as their head coach now.

The past forever
Repeats itself always for
The Chicago Bears

clint greasewood

Tankathon website crashed/

Redshirt

I’m not insulting Cleveland; I’m describing Cleveland.

Redshirt

Central Avenue and 7th Street in Cincinnati, I call it the summit of Mt. Everest, because US Route 22 and Ohio State Route 3 start there and its all downhill as they march towards their respective terminuses.

(I’m transitioning from New York Giants insults to Cleveland Browns insults)

Doktor Zymm

All you have to do is say their name as their very existence is an insult

Redshirt

As God as my witness, you stole my next insult!

BugEyedBoo

Rt. 3 runs through Columbus. Westerville represent!

BeefReeferLives

Y’know, although it was just delicious watching Rodger’s Achilles snap like an old rubber band in his 1st possession last year, it’s been even more fun watching him being beaten and humiliated throughout the season this year.

King Hippo

and unlike Dingleberry, it doesn’t seem like the injury really hampers his mobilty. He just sucks out loud now.

Doktor Zymm

I hope he doesn’t retire so we can see what fresh hell next year holds for him!