Mrs. Anderson’s Potluck is Decadent and Depraved: Tuesday Open Thread

If anyone asks, I was here with you all the whole time. Rikki told a story about how he met his wife when he was selling vacuums door to door, and I spilled a beer on myself at the part where she asked him about his selection of attachments.

NFL NEWS:

-Nick Chubb has escaped Cleveland!

But he escaped to Houston, which would be the Cleveland of the AFC South if not for Jacksonville.

I suppose now that God Botherer Jack Easterby left town, it’s acceptable to publicly have a Chubb.

-Aaron Rodgers’ corpse has shambled out onto the practice field for the Steelers for the first time. It’s a match made in heaven, a dude and a team who both seem to be tired of livin’, but are too scared of What Comes Next to let go.

Lot of that going around right now. The Who just announced a “Farewell Tour.” The two actual members are over 80. One’s a mostly-deaf pedophile, the other is a very deaf Old-Tory-Verging-On-Republican. I saw them 25 years ago and it was a joke then that Roger Daltry has to kinda mumble through the line of “My Generation” where he hopes he dies before he gets old. Literally the most interesting thing is these two publicly fighting with Ringo Starr’s nepobaby (himself rapidly approaching pensioner age) about whether he quit or they fired him.

My first boss “practiced” law into his 90s. He had no family, no real hobbies, no real identity outside the role he had created for himself. I visited him in the hospital as he was in his last illness, and his first words to me were “Did you see my comments on that draft?” I didn’t have the heart to tell him I hadn’t worked for him for almost a decade, so I told him I had, he made an interesting point, and I would incorporate it into the next draft. Went home that night, got roaringly drunk and gave my wife a letter to hold onto, with instructions to hand me that letter on the day I need to hang up my spikes permanently.

I’d suggest Aaron should have done the same, but I’m not sure his bad wiring could handle the concept of a message from his past self.

-ESPN’s coverage of…everything…has been shit for a while, but seriously: you are at least ostensibly journalists:

“Strike lightning twice.”

Strike.

Lightning.

Twice.

Fuck’s sake.

-Based on this live look-in, it looks like Rodgers is already having an impaxt on Steelers team culture

 

 

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Brocky

Two truths and a lie

Today Kate Upton celebrated her birthday
Today Elizabeth Hurley celebrated her birthday
Today, I did a bunch of fun things because everyone knows birthdays in your mid thirties are fucking lit

Gumbygirl

I spent a big chunk of the day putting together one of those over the toilet shelving unit thingies. Step 11 was to put it into place and then attach it to the wall and add the final support brackets. It was then I realized that it didn’t fit, and there was not a fucking thing I could do to force it to fit. Did I swear a blue streak, bust it into tiny pieces, and toss it in the dumpster? You bet your ass I did! Like a motherfucking lady!

SonOfSpam

Like they say…measure never, cut into pieces and throw away once

Gumbygirl

I did measure it. It should have fit, according to the stated dimensions, but they were a LIE!

rockingdog

5-0 Padres lead thru 6!

That’s Rockingggg!!!!!!

Gooooo Padres! ⚾️

2Pack

I too am trying to strike lightning twice at this here conference. Gonna see what this hotel’s “fitness room” has to pain me with. Then I’ll be fitness complementary breakfast in me mouth before I MC the gig. Ciao tutti. Pool was nice last night.

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rockingdog

Found a funny:

🇲🇽

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“I mean *I* do…” – Pedophile Matt Gaetz

SonOfSpam

Sprots tonite:

a) US Men’s soccer team getting neutered by the Swiss 4-0 in Nashville. Lookin good for the Cup next year!
8) Aaron Judge hit one 400+69 feet. Nice. (Felt shameful to vote for him for the All Star Game, but it had to be done. His late-season injury/swoon will be more painful than usual.)
^) In the WNBA, the Liberty beat the Sky, and the Dream beat the Fever. Those aren’t team names, those are conceptual soul feelings.

Sharkbait

I was hoping Poch would be that guy. He’s not that guy

SonOfSpam

Agree, was cautiously optimistic, but maybe nobody can be that guy.

Sharkbait

In his defense he’s got the B/C team out there but oof

Horatio Cornblower

Yeah, this isn’t the team that will be playing in the World Cup.

That one will likely be much, much worse.

Jimbo

I remember when Poch was that guy.

Pnch
Horatio Cornblower

Was the doctor OK?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
rockingdog

I think one of the Dodgers hitters just took a pitch to the Nuts 🥜 ⚾️

lol

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

We got home from walking the dog at 4:45 and the Dr. Mrs. asked me when dinner would be ready because she’s really hungry. It is currently 6:10, her dinner has been ready since 5:15, and she hasn’t been downstairs in over an hour. I can hear her cleaning.

Last edited 10 months ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

If I only had the guts…

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SonOfSpam

Haggis?

BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

What’s dinner?

LemonJello

It’s a meal usually eaten in the evening, but that’s not important right now.

scotchnaut

Don’t call GTD, Shirley.

Horatio Cornblower

I wish we had a way to banner these in context.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It definitely belongs in KOTW.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

[finally having caught his breath after LemonJello’s gem]

Burritos with sous-vided sirloin steak, cheddar, avocado, and green salsa.

Sharkbait

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

The first comment made me literally lol

Doktor Zymm

If you have a group of people who are on strike, and they all bleach their hair two times, then the headline “Strike Lightening Twice” would make sense. Or if there was a player named ‘Lightning’ that Vic Fangio successfully struck one time we could legitimately question whether he was capable of smacking him again.

Don T

I saw Los Who in ‘96 or ‘97 in Colorado, the Quadrophenia tour. So I got to see The Ox, Entwhistle. Amazing show, despite Gary Glitter playing the godfather
https://youtu.be/B7FrIt352VE?si=d_3bgmKQZ5dtE3A-

SonOfSpam

Saw em in ’89, so same-ish lineup as you. Great show.

Will NAWT be seeing current corpses at the Hollywood Bowl.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Quadrophenia is the best album ever produced and I will die on that hill. Or else they will, probably them; they’re incredibly old.

Doktor Zymm

Will they even make it onto the hill with those hips?

Horatio Cornblower

Gee, I wonder what Gary Glitter and Townsend talked about…

SonOfSpam

Just the little things.

scotchnaut

Weird Trajectory Life Alert:

Youngest Skull Fracture Boy and Oldest Skull Fracture Boy-they don’t seem to like each other. At all. Anyone run into this shit-suation?

ballsofsteelandfury

What’s the age gap?

scotchnaut

Two years. I think they’re both stubborn bastards that let old wounds fester unlike their old man.

Last edited 10 months ago by scotchnaut
SonOfSpam

Definitely better to just stab it out.

ballsofsteelandfury

My brother and I are about the same age gap. I think the fundamental problem is that they both disagree about the decisions the other makes. One probably thinks the other one is an idiot for not doing things the way he would.

My brother and I got over it by just accepting that each has their own life and each will make their own mistakes. As long as one doesn’t expect the other to bail them out, they’ll be fine. My brother and I are not super super close, but we don’t hate each other.

WCS

If they’re siblings, that’s just nature.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Natural enemies, like Englishmen and Scots.

Jimbo

And Scots and other Scots.

Don T

Spend the runup to Fathers’ Day wailing “WHY why can’t you get along?” and say you don’t want any gifts this year.

Oh, sons! Never mind. Order them to make up because they’re breaking their mother’s heart.

yeah right

My girls had a few moments but the youngest was in her early teens at the time. They’re great now.
I think.

LemonJello

Are you sure its not just the CTE they both assuredly have?

scotchnaut

Goddamn it, Lemon!

BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

I have nawt spoken to my brother in close to 15 years. We are nothing alike and he’s done too many shitty things over the years for me to even want to have any kind of a relationship. I’m good with this and like the lack of drama it brings

scotchnaut

When I was in my early 20’s I read some passage written by William S. Burroughs-of all people-that said something to the effect, “Your family are just people like everyone else that you meet in your life-you have no obligation to them whatsoever if they don’t treat you in the same positive way that you have treated them.”

ArmedandHammered

You just have to give them a common enemy.

ballsofsteelandfury

THIS

scotchnaut

“I’ve been right here all the time.”

-Their paternal grandmother

Horatio Cornblower

I deal, not regularly but more often than I should, with attorneys who simply cannot, for whatever reason, walk away from the practice of law. It never ends well, and is frequently embarrassing for everyone else. More than once myself and a judge have had to wink and nod at each other and either gloss over something or clean up (so far only figuratively, thank Xenu) something the elder statesmen has either done or forgotten to do.

Me?

I can’t wait to run away screaming from the whole thing.

Don T

I’ll quit the biz when I find another industry where I can profit from my phone condescension and my incredulous gestures. Them pursed lips don’t work in media.

SonOfSpam

Only thing keeping me from retirement is that pesky “things cost money” thing.

People who can’tstop won’tstop working are a mystery and frankly sad.

scotchnaut

“Things cost money”? You gotta start living the “Yoink!” lifestyle, brother.

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