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BEAR DOWN For Coach Tommy!

King Hippo

/

,

OK, the Fightin’ Blax get a shout out this week, solely for Coach Tommy publicly turning down the U*NC jorb.  Fucking LOVE it.

Beyond that, I am still in personal limbo.  I play Footy Manager, I read booky-books (the darker the better).  I bought Horatio’s Krakatoa book, and reserved Dok’s Hangman’s Daughter at the lie-BERRY.

Tough week for Pam Bondi, and it’s confession time.  I’d hate myself afterwards (and probably during)…but Bondi was 100% Hippo’s fascist cabinet member hate fuck.  Too bad we ain’t do a fantasy draft FOAR that, now it’s too late baby, now it’s too late.

When this fascist fever breaks (ok, IF), send Hippo in to speak to Bondi.  She’ll name names and testify, I just know it.  And I bet her shoulders will be excellent, and in need of a good massage.

God, am I ever a fucking creep.  What’s wrong with me???

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ballsofsteelandfury

New thread is Up!

1
Unsurprised

I know that most people, and especially most people on social media and especially most people on Twitter are so fucking stupid it’s scary, but the Dead Internet Theory has recently been proven as more than half of all traffic is bots and growing. And so the bots are feeding the idiots and the idiots are feeding the bots and everyone is feeding LLM chat bots so that in a year the probability of getting a response that is even remotely factual or true will be zero.

3
ArmedandHammered

Mike Judge’s middle name should be Nostradamous.

1
ArmedandHammered

We’re supporting UConn due to Horatio, right?

3
King Hippo

ah mean, the alternative is MICHIGAN…

2
King Hippo

oh snap, Hippo dun forgots who be playing who. I have a buddy who is an Illini supporter, so I’d be torn if I had the TV on.

All in on Fightin’ Blax tonight, tho

2
Senor Weaselo

You maybe.

(He understands.)

1
ArmedandHammered

As someone with no wolf in this hunt, I thought I would go for the most wolf like mascot left. Plus Lowration might use my testicles as a speedbag.

2
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

And Rikki!

(sorry, we had company)

0
scotchnaut

I’ve always maintained that once the tourney comes down to the Elite 8, [if you can get there] in-game coaching starts to have more and more influence on the final result. It explains why Izzo and Boeheim only have the one title and Mark Few has none.

2
Senor Weaselo

Ended up canceling the rez on the hotel. Roach motel, don’t need roaches or bedbugs on or in my violin case.

The good thing is it was $0 due at booking so even though it said there was a cancellation fee… the place never took a card, hotels.com said I’m good, I have it on record.

5
Doktor Zymm

There are no dudes in the admin that I would hate fuck. Probably because they’re all rapists of some variety, and even if they weren’t I can’t imagine any of them are a decent lay

5
WCS

comment image

“Hey, ladies. Wanna experience REAL MURICKA?”

3
Doktor Zymm

Ewwwwwwwwwwww

1
King Hippo

but he’ll do the GRITTY for ya after!!

0
Gumbygirl

Oh hell no!

0
King Hippo

They should go ahead and engrave City of Men on the Cup.

0
yeah right

One of my best customers at work brought me some hot and spicy beef jerky from Buc-ees in Texas.

Goddamn that’s some good jerky. It’s been slow smoked over post oak and it tastes like Texas barbecue.

He always brings my crew some killer road snacks.

0
King Hippo

Come on, you pricks. We only know one Sham Town supporter, and in no way, shape, nor form can we accept him being happy.

0
King Hippo

SIGH. #BottleJorb

0
BrettFavresColonoscopy

New Balls/2pak collab just dropped:

https://www.instagram.com/p/DWK7LPbAmCw/

1
blaxabbath

I fought with my mom this week and then there was a duck in my pool this morning.

I’m gonna grab some gabbgoul and set up a poker game while waiting for tonight’s Final Four matchup.

4
yeah right

All you need to do is make your bones and you’ll be promoted to Capo.

2
scotchnaut

“That’s the worst set of Segways segues I’ve seen since the last model sent me over a cliff!”

-Jimi Heselden

0
King Hippo

Hippo: At least Handsome Mikel won’t sit back in a shell against Sham Town.

Narrator: Handsome Mikel WOULD sit back in a shell against Sham Town.

1
blaxabbath

We are putting out curbside trash pickup (slash neighborhood free stuff event) and a dude pulled up in his truck. He’s eyeing this stupid Amish wagon wheel i bought years back and blah blah blah — thing is a sitcom joke now. It’s cursed.

Dude gets out wearing a Michigan shirt, walks over, and picks the wheel. Enjoy your curse, dummy.

1016
3
scotchnaut

Wagon Wheel? I’m triggered because this is gotdamn hypnotic.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3NFWgG4_6NI

0
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I remember her! She has one where she’s wearing an Eagles jersey!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uovoFAsIkhA

0
scotchnaut

“Her hips aren’t really as flexible as this. I don’t think she could perform as well in cold weather. I don’t think she’s an Eagles fan. We hate everything.”

-typical Eagles fan take

2
yeah right

Important safety tip!

If you’re ever in an accident and your airbag deploys, shower that shit off the first opportunity you have.

That shit burns AND it smells like the depths of Hell.

6
Jimbo

Shower that shit off is also recommended after visiting a Taco Bell.

5
blaxabbath

– Danica Patrick

Last edited 1 month ago by blaxabbath
5
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

We also would have accepted “Tiger Woods”.

2
blaxabbath

I hadn’t appreciated that this one was a single car rollover for Tiger. When I read the officer evaluating the field sobriety test was a girl cop, I knew Trump had all the ammo he needs to send the white supremacists at his disposal to “do the right thing”.

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Huh. I always assumed this was a Bill Cosby quote.

comment image

5
scotchnaut

Plato was Jimmy Savile’s favorite philosopher. ppl forget that

1
ArmedandHammered

I was watching a clip about old explotation movies and it was mentioned that one of the actresses in the clip lost her son and her friend ol’ Bill Cosby (this was the 60’s) came over to console her with alcohol and something to help her sleep. just when I thought the man could sink no lower in my opion.

2
Jimbo

Based on current events, here’s my list of upcoming movie remakes/sequels:

  • The Rock 
  • Black Hawk Down

•Behind Enemy Lines

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Um, aren’t you forgetting something?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Py1LeIf3xQE

1
King Hippo

A 30 Rock re-boot, but with a Bari Weiss character!

2
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Frost/Nixon

0
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Oh, FUCK YOU google for changing your listing from “ESPN+” to “ESPN (subscription)” and making me waste time firing up the app thinking the FA Cup game is on regular ESPN.

1
Brick Meathook

By the way, Lent actually ended at sunset on Holy Thursday. So drink up.

IMG_0921
8
Mr. Ayo

I’m on it!

2
scotchnaut

A martini, a whiskey and a 5% root beer thingy over here. A balanced diet is important.

3
WCS

I grew up Catholic. I have asked many people, including priests, when Lent ends. I always get different answers.

4
scotchnaut

Given the news about Italy kicked out of the World Cup, I wonder if Marika’s bra is at half-mast.

mar
3
ballsofsteelandfury

No bra can contain her!

1
scotchnaut

“NO BRA, NO MERCY! NO BRA, NO MERCY!”

/wait, what?

3
Unsurprised

LOL. Byron Noem couldn’t even hack it as a camgirl’s sub because he kept telling her what to do. What a fucking dipshit.

4
Unsurprised

I have a tummy ache from overdoing it to compensate for the booze. And because I use food to self-harm.

Anyway. I should get out soon while it’s nice out. I have a fuckload of paperwork to do but eh.

0
yeah right

The good news is I did get the license plate of that car.

Fucking hell I’m sore.

It’s a move very slowly day.

7
Brick Meathook

Get an attorney and say nothing to anyone else, especially an insurance company.

IMG_0032
5
yeah right

Attorney acquired.

3
Brick Meathook

Is that a Hippo/Horatio/DonT attorney, or an attorney who has a billboard?

Accept no substitutes. Sweet James Has Your Back!

5
King Hippo

oh yeah, I’d call a Billboard Attorney. That’s the kind of shit you only know how to do if you do it in volume, everyday (like residential real estate closings).

3
Brick Meathook

Yeah Right just needs to drive up the 710 freeway from Long Beach (his neck of the woods) to Pasadena-adjacent (Balls country). There is a different lawyer billboard every 500 feet, some of them actually mentioning the competitors billboards. It’s that crazy.

Of course, Yeah Right probably can’t drive right now (what with the neck brace and crutches) but he can take an Uber to Pasadena and back. And if the Uber gets in accident he can go around LAX and see all the billboards for attorneys who sue rideshare operators.

2
yeah right

Definitely a billboard attorney.

2
Gumbygirl

Yes, but Morgan and Morgan are for the people!

0
Brick Meathook

And let’s welcome Yeah Right to the opiates club!

The real trick is to take half of them (with booze) and then sell the other half to high school kids. $$$$

4
scotchnaut

And then sell the other half to high school kids

I had no idea that Brick graduated cum loudly from The Jeff Epstein School For Girls That Can Keep Their Mouths Shut For A Few Years.

1
Brick Meathook

Nah, I just sell ‘em to the athletes, they’re the best customers, and they got money. I don’t give a shit what they do with them. None of my business.

0
Gumbygirl

Ooooh hunny, I’m sorry! Hope you feel better and get all the good drugs!

1
Horatio Cornblower

Kinda surprised I don’t have much of a hangover after last night, although it does occur to me I may still be drunk.

5
Unsurprised

Hangovers aren’t real

1
Doktor Zymm

Hangovers are Wyoming!

3
Horatio Cornblower

comment image

0
BrettFavresColonoscopy

You’re thinking of birds

0
blaxabbath

New ASU Head Coach Randy Bennett is excited for his Devils Final Four watch party tonight!

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Last edited 1 month ago by blaxabbath
6
King Hippo

Amazing choreography and range from a 3-song live set. These ninjas is going places, BUHLEE DAT.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-9JFf8TSWg

0
scotchnaut

I guess if you eat this it’s your funeral?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pzm7NBODNGw

2
yeah right

Minnesota is clearly the epicenter of fucked up food.

And I actually LIKE most of their food.

0
King Hippo

Semen, YO!!!!!

1
scotchnaut

“And they’re headed for the exits!” A feather in Pep Lite’s cap.

2
scotchnaut

Kinda makes sense that Man City’s assistant manager would be called Pep as well.

0
scotchnaut

Haaland being Haaland. No one that big should be able to reverse direction that quickly.

2
King Hippo

Redshite fluffers all triggered by your mention of quickly reversing direction

0
ballsofsteelandfury

So WASPy of you to be ashamed of your own perversions instead of leaning into them.

I bet you Bondi would let you stick it in her butt…

2
King Hippo

All JESUS CHRIST wants is for us to learn how to hate ourselves, as His heavenly Father hates us. Imagine how much better the world could be…

1
blaxabbath

I don’t mean to sound all fanboy BUT…
Tommy Lloyd is the kind of big picture tactician that would allow his ‘drama story’ to consume the pre-game spotlight in order to protect his team from the filth that is the fake news media.

Whereas UNC is a basketball program that is dead.

1
BrettFavresColonoscopy

No, no, it’s bear down for midterms

4
blaxabbath

Why the foar midterms?

0
King Hippo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IxPkqcFbcBw

1
scotchnaut

Man City and Bailey’s and coffee is back on the menu, boys!

1
King Hippo

I will turn this on if/when y’all get up by an embarrassing margin.

0
King Hippo

(yes, 4-nil so qualified)

1
86
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