Your Monday Night Open Thread

Well, by gosh we got some interesting news today. Let’s get right to it.

This Is HUGE!:

No one could have possibly seen this coming but here we are-Odell Beckham Jr. has returned to the Giants. Lordy Be! In my mind’s eye I just see him pleading to Mara saying, “Oh c’mon man, I need a job. Last time I was here I did prettay, prettay good. Whadda ya say?” And because Mara is a sentimental old geezer he gave the ok. Now the wr room is filled to bursting with washed up and never was guys, what with Braxton Berrios and Juju Smith-Schuster joining the ACL-ed Nabers and Darnell Mooney. Beckham spoke of ‘unfinished business’ which probably includes exploding his left ankle because he’s destroyed pretty much every other part of his lower body.

Going Ta Extra Myles:

I’m not going to crap on Browns GM Andrew Berry because I just don’t think he would be allowed to do this trade without Jimmy Haslam being consulted the entire way. I mean, this is the fella that allegedly forced the team to draft Shedeur. (a story that has been buried by the sycophantic NFL media, by the by) He’s trying his unintentional best to get into the rarified air of uber-shitty owners like Jerrah and Woody-and he keeps making the right moves to do so. Cleveland get DROY Jarod Verse on a rookie deal (ok, not bad) and a 1st, 2nd and 3rd draft pick in years ’27 thru ’29. Oof, that’s spread out too far and that first next year is going to be bottom 5. Though if Berry is a wily fella he can use that to move up the board but that is thinking way too far ahead. The Rams? They’ve gone and done it again. Seemingly the only team in the brutal NFC West that understands what’s at stake next season, I’m looking forward to watching a few of their early tilts.

More Berry News:

Raymond Berry passed away at the age of 93. He’s such a damn anomaly. What football players makes it into his 90’s? Who was he? He was the Hall of Fame WR that helped make Johnny Unitas who he was. Berry was drafted in the 20th(!) round and ended his career #1 in receptions, yards and TDs. (according to one source but I think Don Hutson had more scores but I’m up against the clock) He fumbled exactly once over 13 seasons. He ended up coaching the Pats to a Super Bowl as well so he has 2 NFL championships as a player on top of that. A very accomplished dude.

“Hey Ciara, I’m on TV!”:

Russell Wilson is apparently dotting I’s and crossing T’s on a contract with the broken down, desiccated corpse of CBS Sports. It’s exactly where his big fat Christian face belongs. I can see grandfathers across the nation benevolently saying, “He’d have made a great House N*gger back in the day!” on Sunday mornings.

Late Borking News:

That everyone knew was coming. A.J. Brown to the Pats for a 2nd rounder next year and a 1st the year after. The question is, ‘How long will “The Cranky One” be engaged’? I give it one and a half seasons. I think this might be what Roseman is banking on as well, given the years of the picks.

Sprots Ce Soir:

Baseball?

Soccer: A massive tilt between Canada and the Sheep Fucking, Non-Showering, Hut-Dwelling, Suspender-Wearing, Goats Head-Kicking troglodytes that are the semi-humans from Uzbekistan. [puts finger to earpiece] “Oh, it’s a Friendly? Whoops. These mountain-dwelling folks hardly ever have intercourse with dead things. My apologies.”

Do that thing you do.