Jalen Ramsey Show – 028: Takers

Welcome back to another hour of The Jalen Ramsey Show. We are here today to talk about your life and your money. We’re still a couple months out from the 2026 Hall of Fame Game between the Carolina Panthers and the Arizona Cardinals so this summertime work is when we separate the wheat from the chaff — or the rust from the low-carbon steel, as some area man called to me from the sidelines up here once. Fucking rural. So we have open lines at 412-432-7800. Starting off today on line one with Dallas in Egan, Minnesota. Dallas, welcome to The Jalen Ramsey Show today.

Hey Jalen. Thank you taking my call. how are you doing today?

Better than the Jaguars under Tom Coughlin. How can I help?

I don’t even know how to put this, Pretty embarrassing moment happened to me, Jalen. First off, I’m a 22 year old first-rounder — former SEC Defensive Player of the Year at Alabama actually. Going into my third year in the league. Actually recorded a sack in my very first game last year and so I’m feeling pretty confident, you know about football stuff, as I prepare for that veteran leap.

That’s the place to be.

But I’m starting to let the doubts in my personal life effect my play on the field. And you know that’s no good.

Lots happening to a young man entering his second training camp. People forget that your first year as a veteran is unique too. You’ve never been on the side of experience. You’re a rookie-veteran in a sense. What’s happened that you see as a problem?

I got a call from a banker out of state at JP Morgan. Dude explained a guy was in there with two forms of ID showing he was me, you know, and that he was trying to get my money. Completely understandably, the bank thought something was up so they were calling me to pull the money out of my account before that guy did. So we moved the cash into a couple accounts the bank had set up for me so keep it safe. But I guess CNL FL, LLC and Island Food Truck, LLC weren’t like, real for me. So we lost the money. I guess scammers are using the internet now?

So wait — did you say you were a 22 year old man — or a 76 year old nursing home resident?

Caller was very convincing. You’d have gone for it, Jalen. Made it sound like we had to act like, now, because it was a race between me and this guy in Arizona for my money. So now it’s got me thinking I might not be as sharp as I once was mentally and that’s hurting my on-field confidence. But this could happen to anyone though, right?

Experts figure elder fraud reached $12.5 billion in 2025. Estimate 1 in 8 cognizant seniors is directly targeted in a fraud scam annually. Meanwhile, the University of Alabama alumni network boasts over 200,000 individuals. So, rough back-of-the-envelope math — yeah, it could happen to anyone who got an education in Alabama every year.

What is an envelope back?

Continuing on for our listeners, the average reported loss was over $1,000 per elderly victim. It was about $500 across all ages. How much did you give up now?

$240,000.00. But we’ve already got $2,500 back so I think we’re fine. I mean, in a digital era, it seems like the bank will get me my money back within 180 days.  

The bank is probably targeting you for one of their scams next. But outside those crooks, typically fraud focuses on getting your emotions up — either by trying to tug at your heartstrings or put you in a sense of panic. Tech support scams are very big because it’s easy to handover control of you computer so easily. In your case, they preyed on your lack of understand that the bank is on the hook for any dollar they give up from your account without your approval.

Why does no one teach me this?

We do. I mean, this information has been in front of you at one time or another but never when you’re interested. It’s in your rookie training packet on the backside of the insert about condoms. And it’s like the first thing every financial institution will tell you. But you never learn it. It’s lost in the non-stop assault for your attention. The Vikings didn’t have a statement on your situation because the Vikings don’t care about your personal wealth. Hell, this helps them — fools giving up a game check to scammers probably aren’t looking to hold out anytime soon. But I bet they are on your ass about knowing what substances will have you pissing hot.

Man, I feel alone. So how can I be sure this does not happen again?

Well, generally, manipulating emotions is how fraud work. Be emotionless about money. Unless a guy is standing there with a gun to your hand demanding your cash, there’s never really any rush. Be defensive with these bureaucratic institutions and any solicitors. Trust no one.

Yeah but what if that were the actual case and I hadn’t moved my money? I wouldn’t want the bank to be on the hook for giving that guy my money.

I would. I hate banks. But my rule of thumb — and this goes for about all things — if you contact me and tell me I need to do something so you can do something faster — I’ll have to get back to you. It gives you time to remove yourself from the situation, it teaches the person not to contact you again, and it’s never burnt me before. As far as being a bad customer, they’re a bank. You can treat anyone there as bad as you want and they’ll still beg to give you a $500 CD for 2-years. Kindness to banks is weakness and —

Hey actually forget it. I gotta run Jalen. I just got an email from a new account rep at JP Morgan who says he has a new ‘All Secure’ account set up for me to deposit the rest of my funds. I just need to get down to Western Union to make the transaction. See, JP Morgan is looking out for me. I feel like myself again! Man, I think it is you, Jalen, who has been no help with this victim-blaming attitude . 

Next time your legal guardian lets you call in, we can go over the various Medicare scams you should not sign up for.

Ahhh — that was a great story. Great story. When he learns to tell that with some confidence, that’ll be a winner at any party. I mean, at the end of the day, all you can do is try to forget about the last play and move on to the next, right? Speaking of next, let’s pick up on line two with Robert Kimchee in Georgia. What’s good, Cabbage Patch?

Life’s good Jalen. Fucking GOOD, BRO! I mean, always some bullshit but you know how it is. Dealing with shit.

Yeah. Great opening, Robert. What brings you to the show?

Jalen, I’m a guy who likes to live in the fast lane and, frankly, I could give a shit about authority. And I don’t mean it in the, “6-foot-3, 275 lbs negro millionaire knows that, when the day comes, some cop just gonna BNBG me and that will be my end” kind of  way. I’m a grown man. Completed college at Ole Miss. Played in THREE North American pro football leagues, and peeled in eight-figures over my career. But now that it’s over, man….

This gonna be one of those who-am-I-if-not-a-part-in-The-Game calls?

You kidding me, Jalen?! Fuck the NFL. Fuck FOOTBALL. You know my mom is a politician in Nigeria my dad a cardiologist. I was always going to be a success. Just fucked up that I had to focus so hard on such a short career. But I’m glad it’s over man. Fucking hated every moment that wasn’t getting paid. The drunk fuck Steve Keim was right — I don’t love football. At least not the way he loves liquor and getting behind the wheel. Nah — I’m just…..not as good at my retirement hobbies as I was in the NFL and it’s…..it’s something, man.

What’s the problem? Little old ladies dropping you at Bingo? Not getting the dinks you expect at the pickleball court? Getting a little slice with your new driver at the range? Mahjong at the clubhouse too competitive for you?

Nah man. Jalen, you see, my bag is stealing. I love stealing. Always have. Just like — like looking for a weakness in a trash o-line protecting an overrated quarterback, finding schemes to ‘sack’ some goods without paying is just like my passion. But I’ll be damned if I didn’t again get arrested recently forshoplifting from a Kroger. And since I had some outstanding warrants elsewhere, that all just became a thing and — former top-recruit here, Jalen. I’m not used to struggling when I actually try.

Sounds like you need to schedule a cupcake.

A cupcake?

Think about it. When you were back at Ole Miss and you wanted to start a hot season, wouldn’t your coach bring in someone for you to just absolutely beat up on? Some barely D-1 team you could literally kill on the field — and for exactly one reason: to get that confidence up.

Yeah but modern shoplifting measures are targeting black men like me. They want to catch me doing something wrong. Did you know I once fell out a window at a Grand Hyatt in college and ended up getting pinned with a weed charge?

Fucking weed charge? What year are you from, man!

I’m one month old than you, Jalen!

I’m gonna hook you up with that last caller so you two can carpool to the We Buy Crypto atm.

Digital stealing. Pffff. Where’s the rush? I need the rush of doing wrong. But getting caught is getting old and I’m not optimistic that AI will help me.

You ain’t doing nothing wrong here. This is 2026, friend. You don’t shoplift; you make a mistake at the self checkout. Let me guess? You went and walked around the store then got caught walking out with a big ass Velveeta block sticking out of your pant leg?

Almond milk. I was gonna do smoothies.

Great. So, is everyone else. 36 million American have stolen from self-check kiosks. 27% of consumers admit to stealing and, of those, 55% admit they will steal again! Brother — you are in good company. And every store that puts up self-checkout knowing there is 65% greater loss than traditional checkouts — well, they’re happy to lose the money. But this is a copycat hobby and you need to look at the McVay’s of the retail theft world to make it in 2026.

Like those smash and grab rings?

God no. You’ll be shot. And, even if not, everyone will be like, “NFL star is part of our ring!” and you’ll get arrested. What you need to focus on is the shopplifting fundamentals that Americans are relying on to procure staples in this early-depression United States. From mistakenly scanning the wrong item to missing the count to forgetting almond milk in your cart, how can you be responsible for operating equipment you’ve not been trained on?

No shit. I don’t work for them.

35% of self-checkout users agree with you and, in fact, see theft as compensation for their unpaid labor. But you can’t show that on your face. You’re confused. You’re a football player. You don’t get how this works. I mean, the idea that you’re trying to do anything other than go about your business and pay the ten dollars or whatever it costs for a banana, you’re just going through the motions. I bet you’d be as surprised as them to find out it didn’t get charged though! And at the price of everything — who knows what a reasonable cost is for a cart of groceries?

Sounds easy until you realize the lady at the door is going to scan my receipt.

My brother in Christ, unless you are at a membership store like Costco, you do not need to stop for the Walmart greeter. As you walk by him/her (and the line of dumbshits waiting to be treated like some common thief), make eye contact and offer a, “Have a nice day,” as you would to any other person not challenging your rights as you exit with that Xbox360 in your waistband.

Then I’m home free? 

I mean, they probably know your ass. Plus you’d like enter your Kroger ID number before the theft too. Either way, Robert, the system is going to make an example out of you specifically. This is where AI starts; at codifying existed oppression of minorities. So, as I see it, Whitey should want to protect you because, if they can’t get your black ass at Kroger, they ain’t gonna get Shaylyn and Aiden ripping off baby formula and Poppi drinks down at the Target.

Fucking CEO of Kroger makes $17million a year. Let him pick up the tab.

Let him. He runs that business. And the buck sops at the top, does it not? Same as I am responsible for my business and my name and my processes, someone needs to love Kroger. Now, I don’t speak for Kroger’s investors but I see leadership there that doesn’t love Kroger the way I love the Jalen Ramsey brand. And businesses suffer under the hands of poor leadership that is only interested in enriching themselves at both the current and future cost to the organization. That’s all that is happening with Kroger CEO Greg Foran, the Epstein Island attendee.

And they all want to make me out to be the bad guy! Fuck that. I’ll show ’em. Just let me grab my handgun here and —

And that will do it for our time today, Robert. Good luck out there getting that cheese.

Good calls today. Lots going on right now in world. Want to remind my listened to keep your eyes open and your heads up. Keep strong and we’ll see you next time, right here, on The Jalen Ramsey Show.