Hello there fellow DFO’er.  Hope you’re well today.  And thanks for coming back to see last weeks tl;dr of last week as decided by my brain.  There’s no reason as to why some comments make it and others don’t. Seriously. There isn’t.

Doing this while in a meeting, good use of my time in my opinion.  This makes me wonder if there’s a AI plug in for WP, and i can be replaced by an LLM.  You’d probably notice as there’s be more of a preamble and be more interesting.  

Without further ado, here are the comments of the week.


Still the king of all sequel names:

SonOfSpam

….holy shit that’s where that phrase comes from?
Brocky


I would make a “Factory of Sadness must have transitioned into war production because they are in Tank Mode” joke here but I already have the banner and me celebrating that the Bengals don’t have to face him this year would all but guarantee a Super Bowl run facing the Rams and Myles Garrett.
Redshirt


I knew it reminded me of something

Gumbygirl


Good work Sir, thanks for all you do.

Weeding is my summer flexibility work. And it’s friggin endless. Just spent an hour this morning in the fight.

2Pack


I have lost 85ish pounds in the last 18 months from a peak of 335 in 11/24.

In the past I would have been shitty about others’ weight loss that involved surgery or a GLP-1 as ‘taking the easy way out’ but there really are so many avenues to getting healthy and reclaiming your life.

I was fortunate to have done somewhat physical work during my major weight gain from 2019-2024 (I’d been steadily gaining since 2008), but I realized doing said job was what fucking my life up so quitting it two years ago and subsequently losing the weight felt like getting a tumor removed.

I feel like a new person. The lady down the street (who is not dementia addled) didn’t recognize me when I needed to ask her husband for a tool the other day. It’s weird, I knew I was doing well healthwise based upon bloodwork and just being to do more physically, but when multiple people tell me I look ‘amazing’ it hits differently.

Good luck with your back, that’s a difficult road to traverse.
Buddy Cole’s Halftime Show


I’m falling asleep against my will but just wanted to say thanks again for reading. Say hi to RTD and gumbygirl for me. Hope to see you all again soon
Alex_Demote


Congrats on the game and the weight loss! As a fellow 6’1 6’2 er. I work out regularly not to build muscle but to keep from developing a belly. It seems that when it has gotten away from me that is where all the weight goes. Happened to my father too. I also notice that half an hour a day is so good for my brain, when I get stagnant for a week or two I am irritable, and basically a dickhead to others.
litre_cola


So apparently in high school Bo Jackson did the decathalon and in some competitions he was so far ahead there was no need to run the 1500m on the last day. His high jump record stood for 37 years.
scotchnaut


New species discovered in Angola. Crowned Crab spider. Fucker glows! Very cool, but if I saw one in my place I would stroke out immediately.

Gumbygirl


Congratulations to Alex and Buddy for kicking obesity’s ass
Unsurprised


lol Jason Garrett has endorsed Michelle Tafoya in her MN Senate race.

That will motherfucking move the needle!
SonOfSpam

If I was a Minnesotan and on the fence, this would absolutely push me to vote against her.
BrettFavresColonoscopy


 


Redshirt


Go Alouettes!

And… Today in 2Packs garden pro tips.

Here’s a cactus plant purchased last year and cared for.

And here’s a piece of a cactus plant that I just stuck in the dirt under a potted pine tree and totally ignored for two years.

Both photos taken today.

There’s a life lesson here folks.

2Pack


Speaking of life-giving water, nickel-and-diming patrons like this should surely solve any issues that FIFA is having with sluggish ticket sales.
https://www.nbcnews.com/sports/soccer/fifa-bans-water-bottles-world-cup-stadiums-fans-heat-rcna348419
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m very close to the point where I’m not even gonna bother to watch.
Horatio Cornblower


I didn’t think there was much interference on the disallowed Vegas goal. Let’s check the rule:

1) You can’t just be up there and just doin’ an interference like that.

1a. Interference is when you

1b. Okay well listen. An interference is when you interfere the

1c. Let me start over

1c-a. The skater is not allowed to do a block to the, uh, goalie, that prohibits the goalie from doing, you know, just trying to save the puck. You can’t do that.

1c-b. Once the skater is in the offensive zone, he can’t be over here and say to the goalie, like, “I’m gonna get ya! I’m gonna block your view! You better watch your butt!” and then just be like he didn’t even do that.

1c-b(1). Like, if you’re about to make a goal and then don’t leave the crease, you have to still leave the crease. You cannot not avoid the goaltender. Does that make any sense?

1c-b(2). You gotta be, skating motion out of the crease, and then, until you just leave it.

1c-b(2)-a. Okay, well, you can have your stick up here, like this, but then there’s the interference you gotta think about.

1c-b(2)-b. Fairuza Interference hasn’t been in any movies in forever. I hope she wasn’t typecast as that racist lady in American History X.

1c-b(2)-b(i). Oh wait, she was in The Waterboy too! That would be even worse.

1c-b(2)-b(ii). “get in mah bellah” — Adam Water, “The Waterboy.” Haha, classic…

1c-b(3). Okay seriously though. An interference is when the skater makes a movement that, as determined by, when you do a move involving the goalie and the crease…

2) Do not do an interference please.
Sharkbait


Basically my position was cut by the client – DOGE, assholes, and the government using its own resources.

I have been completely frozen out by my boss and members of the “team.” Yeah, real professional.

I texted my boss to see if we could talk – 5 minutes – just to get an idea of the situation. Texted back: “Fozz, I’ll get in touch when something happens.” That’s it? You gutless muppet. You soulless hyena.

So, I composed a goodbye email in my mind, which highlights what I hate about each of my coworkers.

Here are a few phrases:

“head so far up the client’s ass they can taste your shitty hair, at least they can’t see your bubble gut”

“get off the medicine, you have the soul and emotions of a crushed snail”

“do you realize the diarrhea of words that pour out of your mouth could make Bono punch a nun?”

“you young smirking fuckface. your tattoos make cave drawings look like the Sistine Chapel. Your bullnose ring looks like it was shit out by a claw machine.”
jjfozz


Inspired by Alex’s post and some of the comments thereafter, I’m going to challenge Younger Skull Fracture Boy to a 20lb weight loss challenge. I also brought a third case of hot Italian sausages into the household.

/in summation, the Scotchnaut household is a land of contrasts
scotchnaut


Flying back from Chicago and we’re right next to a pretty big thunder storm. Managed to get a lightning photo

Doktor Zymm


“We’re halfway through the year!”
I strenuously object. If we were halfway through the year I would officially be 49. I still have ~3 more weeks of 48 year old shenanigans. I’m living it up like you wouldn’t believe
Bogdanski


Best Call All Week Award:

Naked man climbed about 25 feet in a tree, is actively doing cocaine.
https://www.reactiongifs.us/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/know_how_to_party_waynes_world.gif
19:09 UPDATE: Male has now climbed approximately 40 feet up, and is out of range of firetruck ladder.

19:12 UPDATE: Plastic bag dropped into woods (there goes his fuel)

19:25 UPDATE: Drone requested (no idea why)
WCS


Something called “Morgan Wallan” had a concert last night and tonight in Yinzburgh. Due to weather conditions, the concert (term used very loosely) was cancelled. Tickets were $300, and my friend who works at a hotel reported rooms were selling for $400.

WCS



Horatio Cornblower


 


Brick Meathook


Ciao tutti.

2Pack


If you don’t habla Espanol, by clicking the link and entering, you’ve just given Balls permission to harvest your organs.
WCS

Good luck with my liver, fucko.
Horatio Cornblower


The dog is napping, the cat is napping, it kind of feels like they are onto something here.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly


One must admit, historical penises is a baller tag!
King Hippo


All these Paris BOTG posts have been terrific but this is the best one yet. YET. I am a museum rat my whole life yet I’ve never been to The Louvre, the big daddy of them all. Reading this post I’m ready to start booking a trip.
Brick Meathook

Thank you my friend. It was more grand than could be imagined. This is just 40 of the 350 photos I took just of the Louvre. Wait until you see the “Musee National Picasso”
DJ TAJ


Holy shit, the next time I get into a car accident I’m booking a trip to the Louvre before I book a trip to the doctor’s office.

Well done, you.
Horatio Cornblower


Today I got the shed cleaned out and cleaned the upstairs bathroom and walked the dog 3.62 miles.

I have earned this blackberry margarita for which the recipe started with 4 oz. of tequila. Oh, wait, this says “serves 2”

I have earned these two blackberry margaritas.
Horatio Cornblower


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Thanks for all the comments and funny and everything else.

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13 Comments
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

CoPilot, generate audio of a violin talking Peter Frampton style and have it say “Come on Knicks fans, is this really who we are?” followed by a chorus of human voices saying “Yes, it is.”

https://www.reddit.com/r/nba/comments/1u0wor7/knicks_fan_pull_on_a_spurs_fans_jersey_then/

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Found a…maybe not funny, but certainly apt:

Great encapsulation of late stage capitalism. On the inside, the protected elite pedophile class. Outside the gates, the poor fight amongst themselves like savages filming each other for pennies.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Donald Trump has once again done the unthinkable:

He’s gotten me to take Stephen A. Smith’s side on something

2Pack

Great recap Sir.

The girls are in thier summer clothes now, and not much of them to be sure. So I’m hitting the bike much more often to see those wonderful sights.

FB_IMG_1780158186800
2Pack

.

bella-bici-felice-di-guida-della-donna-nella-citta-109785463
ballsofsteelandfury

Seriously Brocky didn’t know that’s where it came from?!?!?

scotchnaut

He’s still in his 40’s-he’s just a young pupper.

Doktor Zymm

I’m in my 40s and I knew where it came from! Never seen the movie though the trailer is amazing
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57rxhQXwRfg

SonOfSpam

In Canada, “Breakin’” has to do with the ice and fishing.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

TIL that Canada is basically the town in Footloose where dancing is forbidden.

SonOfSpam

The Kevin Bacon version will be running as a new release this summer in Canada.

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