[DOOR FLIES OPEN]

"Dallas booing the hydration break like it was another Eagles TD." – Don T

Log In

That Thursday Night Thing

scotchnaut

/

, ,

We’re back yet again.

We’re also in July and that’s when things go to shit at work. We’ve already reached that status on the second day of the month. It’s going to be such a long one, folks.

As expected Spain made Austria look ordinary by wearing them down slowly and then applying the dagger thrice. We’ve had our share of shockers but this one just wasn’t going to happen.

This is truly the skinniest week of them all for NFL football news but if you’re hankering for murder news, wedding talk or the Sorsby Saga you could be good. I just can’t make anything out of the material.

I’d like to give a shoutout to the coach of the Belgium WC team for having the unmitigated balls to sub out both The Broom and Doku at the 56th minute and down 2-0. He saw something that no one else did. Doku was incensed and Broom seemed to just shrug his shoulders. Now they can’t say a thing because it worked.

We have more soccer to watch-

Ronaldo’s Id/Italian Tablecloth Crows

and

Stuck in Neutrals/Former French Colony #18

That’s it, that’s all.

5 5 votes
Article Rating

Leave a Reply

Subscribe
Notify of
58 Comments
2Pack

I was stopped this morning by an elderly lady who’s house I pass frequently. She is up early tending her garden. This morning she wished me a happy 4th of July. That was so nice of her.

4
yeah right

Very cool.

It’s the Milwaukee accent that does it?

1
2Pack

must be my latent mid west goofiness

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Have you ever had a seed from a habanero pepper jump from the cutting board into your eye? Until tonight, I hadn’t either!

0
jjfozz

Things more useful than a person in HR

1. Old gum on a pavement, can be scraped up and stuck into HR employee’s hair.
2. Used motor oil burns very well when thrown at an HR employee.
3. Dog poop, easily burned on HR employee’s desk.
4. Urine, freeze it and then place cubes in the corner of HR’s office, when they melt it smells like piss and no one can trace the smell.
5. Old copies of Mein Kampf can be used to block the doors of HR’s office, then building can be set on fire.

3
yeah right

Is that Hop Doddy?

0
Brick Meathook

Rock & Brews

2
yeah right

They’ve added screens next to the upstairs stage.

Love the lighting in those shots.

1
BrettFavresColonoscopy

¿Dónde está el primero?

1
yeah right

It blew up real good.

Chevron doesn’t talk much about it.

4
Brick Meathook

“El Primero” is the Richmond Refinery on San Francisco Bay. Opened in 1902, it was the first Standard refinery in California. In 1911, Standard opened its second California refinery, this time on Santa Monica Bay in SoCal. The City of El Segundo was founded as a Standard Oil “company town” and takes its name from the refinery.

Image
Last edited 10 hours ago by Brick Meathook
0
WCS

The theme of tonight…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H544OpUSGxw

2
yeah right

Got a call from the auto body shop that my car is ready!
It was supposed to be ready Monday, then Tuesday, then Wednesday but I picked it up.

They were closed but the car was left in front of the shop with the paperwork inside.

Awesome!

Drove it home and parked in the garage and hey?

What’s this liquid that chased me down the 12 blocks to get home?

It’s radiator fluid that completely bled out in 12 blocks.

They’re closed for the 3 day weekend too.

We’re still not fixed!

I give zero fucks because it would accomplish nothing.

These are Monday problems.

Hey God?

It’s me Job.

Any more surprises or anything?

The fuck?
Man, what the fuck?

I’m gonna get crunk and not worry about shit until Monday morning.

Now ask me how the appointment to get hearing aids because I lost 70% of my hearing since the accident went?

5
ballsofsteelandfury

comment image

0
2Pack

jeez buddy you are really due to catch a break…

0
blaxabbath

The accident knocked out your hearing?

0
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

THESE GUYS THE ALGERIAN DEFENDERS I CALL THEM THE BALTIMORE POLICE HOMICIDE DEPARTMENT BECAUSE THEY ARE TERRIBLE AT CLEARANCES.

4
WCS

I just had the weirdest call I’ve had regarding a pet dog.

Caller stated the ten-year-old dog had a seizure, woke up, and is now trying to attack everyone in the house. Caller stated he’s had dog since it was a puppy, kind-hearted, sweet as could be. Dog had seizure, and woke up a different animal. The scariest part is when it lunged at the caller’s eight-year-old daugher.

PD is on scene now.

Last edited 13 hours ago by WCS
1
2Pack

Bezerk has been around since the dawn of man.

2
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That just feels awful for everyone involved, including the dog. And you too.

0
WCS

The caller sounded shaken (understandably so), and a mixture of confused and sad. It was a tone of voice I can’t remember hearing before.

4
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I actually can place it. It’s the tone my science teacher in middle school used when I accidentally crushed the demonstration tower for a drinking straw tower competition and he thought I had done on purpose.

0
Gumbygirl

Didn’t Stephen King write that story? Poor Cujo. He was a good boy, until he wasn’t. I read today that a kid in north Ontario woke up to a bat on his face, and he died of rabies. What a fucking horrible way to go.

2
Don T

obligatorio
https://youtu.be/i2XTuc6i1Uo?feature=shared

4
Don T

comment image

2
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

oh my god

4
Gumbygirl

Too soon?

4
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

If they’re really hardcore they will follow it up with a joke about the current Princess of Wales having cancer.

3
BrettFavresColonoscopy

That was a pretty crazy Croatia v Portugal game.

This has been World Cup analysis from BFC.

3
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

120 Minutes Playlist Project Update: In doing this endeavor it has become clear to me how heavily Beavis and Butt-head relied on 120 Minutes for material. MC 900 Ft. Jesus is a better artist than I ever realized.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=urD-YMrGiCk

3
jjfozz

I am now officially unemployed. Also found out I have to file for unemployment in Virginia. Of course the rock apes who are in charge of HR never got back to me. Sent my boss a thank you email and got no response. But I did trash the company on a website that rates companies, so that’s nice.

9
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Sorry, dude.

5
WCS

fozz’s goodbye present:

comment image

2
2Pack

There is something better down the road. I wish you the best of luck getting there quickly.

5
Gumbygirl

Fuck dem assholes, right in the…erm…asshole! This corporate bullshit happened to Gumby so many times, but something else always comes along eventually. Get that sweet unemployment cash and decompress for awhile. We’ll be happy to see more of you!

1
jjfozz

I’ve been through this too many times, but what can you do but keep on grinding? I mean, I could go and burn the fucking place to the ground, but I’m too good looking for prison. Thanks!

7
blaxabbath

Hey Croatia. My rec league defense called. It wants it’s aggressiveness level back.

1
blaxabbath

Portugal’s uniforms look straight out of 1997 Eastbay.

0
Fronkenshteen

Something needs to be done about the offsides rule. The player’s entire body should have to be completely offsides for it to be an infraction. What are they afraid of? Goals? Pleasure?

3
blaxabbath

I’m still trying to understand what they did to my beautiful goal kick.

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Apparently they are looking at a “daylight rule” that means just that.

In theory I would love for them to eliminate the offsides rule in extra time, it seems like that would add a delightful new element of chaos. But if that were true they probably wouldn’t have the rule in the first place.

0
2Pack

Yeah get rid of that, and encourage more contact. That would liven up the game.

0
Don T

Woof. We gots 🔥

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I hated everything about that goal by Portugal. Soft call, stutter step, scored by Ronaldo…UGH.

0
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Oh and I almost forgot, the corner kick that led to the penalty was caused by Croatia’s own ineptitude.

Just gift-wrapped Ronaldo’s first-ever knockout round goal.

0
blaxabbath

I’m sure Hue Jackson being in attendance has nothing to do with this.

4
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Wait, really?

1
blaxabbath

One must assume….

1
Gumbygirl

It’s not like he has anything else to do.

1
SonOfSpam

YAY penalty argument!

I’ll start. You cucks wouldn’t know a penalty if Suarez bit your shoulder, shut up it makes sense

2
litre_cola

Ronaldo is a sexual assaulter, and a douchebag.

2
SonOfSpam

I said “argument” not “something we all heartily agree on because it’s verifiably true”

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

You don’t have to soft-pedal it, he’s a straight-up rapist. He himself told the cops that she said “no”.

2
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I have to root for the Croats here because they sound like a deightful type of frog-person.

2
ballsofsteelandfury

Former French Colony #18 is hilarious!

4
litre_cola

Should have been us in Vancouver but the Swiss organized themselves better at half time. Who would have thunk it?

1
SonOfSpam

I mean, there’s a reason people don’t buy Canadian watches.

2
58
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x