Wumbo Wednesday With Weaselo: Classical Corner, Part 1

Welcome to a brand-new segment inside of Wumbo Wednesday, Classical Corner. As the violinist of the group I’m expected to be the one to class up the joint. Whether that’s justified or not and I’d consider myself classy is beside the point, but like Lent, our Puritan brethren (as in, definitely not Balls) can now end up feeling completely guilt-free for Sexy Friday! And also you can’t have the high-minded vulgarity that our Wikipedia mention on the mother site’s article says without also having the highbrow portion!

How we don’t have our own Wiki at this point is astounding. Not a Wikipedia mention, but I imagine we’d be fighting in edits over the proper spelling of SHAN’KHOR vs. SHAN’KLOR vs. where the apostrophe goes. (Remember to follow the source material.)

I am actually not starting with violin rep, as much as I’d like to, because I don’t have enough time to wax poetic about the violin equivalent of the Bible. So instead, let’s start with other notable firsts. So… first opera?

L’Orfeo it is! This piece by Baroque composer Claudio Monteverdi (1567-1643) is the first major opera. I’ll be honest, there are some things I’ll do program note-like things, and this isn’t one of them.

Also because sometimes WordPress doesn’t want to embed nice. Let’s find out! (Nope. Fine, here is the overture. I don’t need to go too far with the plot, because we know the Orpheus myth and it’s the Orpheus myth.) Anyway, feel free to listen to some music, and maybe listen to the whole opera if you want!

Okay, what about news:

-Cooper Kupp not on IR, but RAMMIT places J G Jonah Jackson and S John Johnson III on IR instead.

-Justin Herbert has an ankle owie. He’s doing better, but it’s unknown whether he’ll play Week 3.

DT Jordan Phillips to IR (wrist).

And what’s on tonight?

Pennant Race Action:
Wild Card Action!
Holy shit the Tigers? vs. Bobby Witt’s Triple Crown nullification journey (DET vs. KC, 7:40, MLBN)

Playoff clinch alerts!
Currently (N1) vs. Currently (N3) (PHI vs. MIL, 7:40, MLBN) (PHI clinches playoffs w/ win and ATL loss; MIL has clinched the NL Central)
Love Going Boom With Their Bats vs. You Had ONE Job, Mariners! (NYY vs. SEA, 9:40, Prime) (NYY clinches playoffs w/ win)

Speaking of the “MIL has clinched the NL Central” news, I’m going to be a young man yelling at clouds at the following:

When did we start putting the clinch letter after the team? The iPhone app has it as “MIL-y” and this is incorrect. Also incorrect:

When did ESPN start using x for division winners? This is all wrong and violates decades of playoff nomenclature, which is the following:

x-Denotes team has clinched playoff spot. Does not quantify playoff spot, but can be used for non-division winning teams.

y-Denotes team has clinched division.

z-Denotes team has clinched best record in conference/league. Now, this one here has also undergone some change because now, thanks to the MLB having two byes they now may use this for clinching a Wild Card Series bye.

*-Denotes team has clinched best record in the sport (previously only used to mark President’s Trophy winner, but can be used for clinching home field throughout playoffs including the championship). Now, does this claim best record in the league and ** for all the sport?

Now you see w being used for wild card teams, which I’m fine with, but that leads to the second part, which is that this is used before the name in the standings, not after. This is in uniformity and formatting purposes.

Jesus, do I have to write a guide book and send it to professional sports, who’ve forgotten it thanks to print media mostly dying out? It’s not this hard, people. I love proper footnoting! (Also because with proper footnoting you can artificially inflate the size of your paper and steal a half-page.) Thank goodness I don’t have to give out a proper paper for my class or I may have a conniption. A friend of mine is teaching a writing-intensive class and I mentioned I’d have to internally go sbemail on them if I were to ever teach one. Oh, we gon’ RED PEN, chuh chuh.

Anyway, go comment in the comments, where I won’t go sbemail on them! (We’re normally okay!)

 

 

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Senor Weaselo
Senor Weaselo plays the violin. He tucks it right under his chin. When he isn't doing that, he enjoys watching his teams (Yankees, Jets, Knicks, and Rangers), trying to ingest enough capsaicin to make himself breathe fire (it hasn't happened yet), and scheming to acquire the Bryant Park zamboni.
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Mr. Ayo

Fucking Mariners. JFC. Two nights in a row with terrible base running blunders and a loss.

Season over. NAWT ROCKING!

WCS

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Dear Condiment, we’re almost to the wonders that is hawkey season that fills the voids between foobawl.

Mr. Ayo

True! First preseason game Sunday! I’m not going because preseason is a joke, but I’ll have it on a second or third screen.

rockingdog

Also gotta post the Leeds Royal Armouries guy!
Lmao!

Seems Rocking!

https://bsky.app/profile/avondeer.bsky.social/post/3l4dvo3ql652w

Unsurprised

The Royal Armouries has a great YouTube channel.

Dunstan

It’s also just a damn cool museum. I don’t remember there being a lot else to do in Leeds anyway, but definitely worth a visit if you’re in the area.

rockingdog

Padres hit Back-to-Back-to-Back Home Runs today!
Got the Win vs those silly Astros.

It was Rockingggg!!!!

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=xP9Od97-8bw

Mr. Ayo

Fuck the Trash Cans! That’s ROCKING!

Sharkbait

Fun fact, there have been 10 instances of teams hitting 4 consecutive home runs in baseball history. JD Drew has been involved in TWO of them (Dodgers in 2006, Red Sox in 2007). Even more strange, he hit the second home run each time.

Wanna make it more weird? His brother Stephen hit the 4th consecutive for Arizona in 2010.

Sharkbait

Also fuck NESN and John Henry forever for how they did Don Orsillo dirty.

Bogdanski

Do you think Rex Ryan watched the game after Altuve’s ejection last night?
Either way, rocking!

rockingdog

Last funny:

“It’s hard to make friends because everyone my age is married.” This is classic scarcity mindset. You must think bigger. If you break up one marriage that’s two potential new friends

jjfozz

And if any of you are interested in how to build a pot of sauce around a cut of pork, listen up;

  1. Get a pork shoulder
  2. Season it with salt, pepper, garlic powder (not salt)
  3. Get a pot, a big one, pour in olive oil, and then dice up garlic and let that simmer
  4. Dump in the pork butt, and some water
  5. Let it cook (you can also hit any person near you with a wooden spoon)
  6. Use the sauce you already made and put that over the pork butt
  7. Let it simmer all day, stir that fucking sauce because I swear to CHRIST IF IT BURNS AND STICKS TO THE BOTTOM OF THE POT I WILL BEAT YOU BLACK AND BLUE

WHAT? YOU THINK MONEY GROWS ON TREES? YOU SEE YOUR MOTHER? YOU SEE HER CRYING? THAT’S BECAUSE OF YOU AND YOUR BROTHERS!

Slam door, pour fourth whisky of the day, drink it, yell at your wife to start crying. Think of your dead mother, start to cry.

Realize the sauce is ready, boil pasta, yell at your kids to get their asses at the dinner table, RIGHT.FUCKING.NOW!

Pray, eat, drink more. Possibly cry.

Game Time Decision

Do the tears go into the sauce?
Is this why it doesn’t call for garlic salt?

jjfozz

My mother always preached that garlic powder has more flavor, while garlic salt only adds more salt to any recipe.

Sharkbait

She’s not wrong

Gatoraids

Like Jacque Pepin and Julia Childs white pepper and black pepper arguments. Jacque still posting more video on you tube

https://youtu.be/m4psw_tGGkU?t=87

Sharkbait

I love his stuff. Ive got sharkette watching The French Chef, as well as Julia and Jacques cooking at home.

Gatoraids

love the recipes and all the small techniques to pick up

jjfozz

“And you know what, Anthony? I told you before I got no problem with the blacks. They’re good people. You ever date a black girl, I will stab you. Got it?”

Sharkbait

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rockingdog

That’s Rocking!

fleshwound_NPG

if swift can do it we can re release all of biggie’s albums n tunes, this time all of them without puffy butting in and bringing nothing to the track but being annoying

big poppa (biggie’s version)

Sharkbait

Hypnotize hits different now with diddy on it.

fleshwound_NPG

suge knight was a bastard but holy shit this aged like a fucking wine https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mv2OMXngkEs

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

He’s always been Puffy to me, and I’ve always hated him.

Unsurprised

I’m so glad to see our 80 year old pudding brained cold warrior president is trying to big dick Putin and even used the mad men “I don’t think about you” meme (as incorrectly as every other brain dead moron who uses it). I am so glad that if he doesn’t get everyone fucking killed that his failed upwards her whole career successor whose political career began at the tip of her boss’s dick will keep the same dumb fuck advisors on to actually run the country and drive this shitty bus over a cliff.

Then again I always make the wrong decision so fuck does it matter

jjfozz

Tonight at the dinner table I was reminiscing with my kids about married life and remembered the time my wife and I got into a screaming, shouting, “I”m going to my parents”, fight about the proper way to cook meatballs.

YOU FRY THEM LIKE MY GRANDMOTHER DID
I BAKE THEM LIKE MY MOTHER DID
JESUS CHRIST SHE’S IRISH, WHAT THE FUCK DOES SHE KNOW?

ThePirateSloth

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WCS

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jjfozz

No, it is NOT. You fry the meatballs, you drain the grease, you put them in the sauce. You do not bake them unless you are in Al Quaeda.

ThePirateSloth

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WCS
WCS

The sentient condiment has the correct answer.

Mr. Ayo

I’m just hoping fozz doesn’t end your existence for even sharing this.

litre_cola

Sir Fozz is too busy waiting with baited breath for Emily in Paris, plot twist, she is in Rome!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Oh that reminds me of an idea I need to jot down for Request Line.

jjfozz

I’m going to camp out at this website and murder every person who visits this page. Should someone make the egregious error of fucking making this dish of shit, they will be executed with a cheese grater.

WCS

This was what I was waiting for, and Mr. Forman never disappoints.

Unsurprised

Death before dishonoring nana’s sauce

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

[quietly blocks pager from receiving incoming calls from jjfozz]

ArmedandHammered

with a pager, I think you may have bigger problems

BugEyedBoo

The real way to make meatballs is nuke them for three or four minutes, then dump them in a jar of sauce/brown gravy/barbecue sauce/grape jelly and chili sauce.

Gatoraids

i fry and throw the grease in there cuz fuck it

Gatoraids

and add some kielbasa in there

Gatoraids

only more dangerous argument is how to load the dish washer

ThePirateSloth

Tomorrow be the best day of days! Tis Int’l Talk Like a Pirate Day!
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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m pre-drinking rum.

Gumbygirl

Let me warm up. ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! I’m ready.

Game Time Decision

It’s me mom’s birthday tomorrow

WCS

I think it’s interesting that rather piling on like we did with Jamarcus, Truth Biscuit, even Ryan Leaf we all are expressing our collective sympathies for Bryce Young.

Mr. Ayo

That’s the David Tepper difference!

WCS

RGIII got a pass due to the Triumvir of Danny Boy/Shanahan/FedEx.

Mr. Ayo

And yet JaMarcus Russell never got the Davis bump.

Probably because it was subdued by the grape drank drain.

Last edited 2 months ago by Mr. Ayo
Doktor Zymm

Also RG3 was actually really good for a season before his knee was ripped off

Mr. Ayo

That team had both Shanahans, LaFleur, McVay, and McDaniel as coaches.

If Danny boy invests anything more than the minimum in a billions dollar enterprise for that field and the grounds crew he would have had a pretty good career and the R******s would have actually been good.

But Danny gonna Danny.

Doktor Zymm

Oh I am very aware. He also should have invested in medical staff that actually had medical training

rockingdog

Found a funny:

ABBOT: oh my god Diddy got arrested!

COSTELLO: did he?

ABBOT: I just said that, Diddy got arrested

COSTELLO: did who get arrested??

ABBOT: Diddy!

COSTELLO: what are you askin me for? did he what?

ABBOT: im not askin, i’m tellin you Diddy got arrested

COSTELLO: i’m asking, what did he do

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I found something similarly amusing:

AHMAD: I don’t think we should use these radios, guys. We suspect there are some parts not typically found in this model; we had an expert give them a once-over.

JALAL: A once what? Over.

AHMAD: A once-over.

JALAL: Sorry still not understanding, A once what? Over.

AHMAD: Look just throw away the radio as qui…

— [explosion flies open] —

Mr. Ayo

Well that’s just stupid. You would say “Once over. Out.”

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Radio etiquette is different in the Middle East. I know this because I used to date a girl who was from…I don’t remember, she told me a bunch of times but it never stuck. Somewhere in that region.

Dunstan

And that’s how Rikki ended up on a terrorist watch list.

LemonJello

From the reports I’m seeing on the news, Operation Jason Pierre-Paul was, hands down, quite successful.

WCS

IDF/Mossad took that GTA V mission with the exploding cell phone to new limits.

Lester would be impressed.

Unsurprised

Israel wasted so many medical professionals. They usually need a shitload of 2000-pounders to do that.

Gumbygirl

I was reading today that they were treating people for hand, arm, and eye injuries mostly. I’m picturing Tarek the Terrorist peering down at his pager, going ” What is wrong with this stupBANG !!

It made me giggle.

ballsofsteelandfury

Definitely not Puritan but surprisingly religious.

I worship the Butt

LemonJello

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ballsofsteelandfury

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Last edited 2 months ago by ballsofsteelandfury
LemonJello

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ArmedandHammered

My favorite English professor used a red pen in the shape of a shovel.

Gumbygirl

I had one who used a green pen, like a weirdo.