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Welcome Back, Mexico! Lesser Footy July Increases Intensity

King Hippo

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After a Xolos/Puebla Friday night opener, a whole bunch of Mexi-folk are in action tonight.  I’m most interesante in the late showdown between Tigres amd Monarcas Morelia (who I like to GAMBLOR upon).  10p EST, on one of your local Mexi-stations, and/or Univision Deportes.

Though I gotta say – Europe mostly waits like 3-4 more weeks, but freaking MEXICO is starting play in the middle of fucking July??  In a Copa del Oro year, no less.  Still, have some Cake:

Beside that, a whole bunch of Scandinavian shite and miscellaneous friendlies await.  Everton finally got a pre-season goal (and a nifty one!) from Captain Coleman in a 1-0 win over Monaco in the Alps.  So I will be free to gamble to my heart’s content.  Huzzah.

What else y’all got going on to pass the miserable time?  I am also reading “One Long Night – A Global History of Concentration Camps.”  Such a fun Hippo, I is.

Also, congrats to Algeria for winning the Afrikan Euros, on a whack-a-doodle deflected goal in the 3rd minute.

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yeah right

As one of the resident old guys here today is very powerful for me. I watched the moon landing on TV as it happened and I’ve been a space cadet ever since. That’s why I have the pride in my job that I do.

If you would have told an 8 year old yeah right that one day he would be working in the aerospace industry I would have thought I lived the right life.

Kind of tearing up over here

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Fronkenshteen

104 degrees (per the heat index) in the Shenandoah valley right now. Fuh.

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Yeah but it’s a mythical heat…

1
litre_cola

At Bad Tattoo brewery in BC. Great name, good beer.

2
rockingdog

goooooo PADRES!!!!
5-6 we got a close game gang!

1
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Hey, yeah right, if we DON’T have the pasta attachment for our KitchenAid, what’s the best way to make pasta at home? Do we need to tweak your recipe to just use a rolling pin?

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yeah right

You could. Just roll it super flat and cut in lengths. I do that for a more rustic noodle like when I’m making goulash. Requires a steady hand and a sharp and COLD knife. It can be done.

Don’t tell anyone but I’m making fresh pasta tomorrow. Not on Sunday Gravy tomorrow but soon.

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yeah right

Same recipe.

1
ballsofsteelandfury

So today is Balls’ day of random errands.

Dental appointment is done. I was in the middle of trying to get my phone upgraded when one of my flip flops broke, so I had to go home and trash them and put on new ones. Then I decided to get the car washed instead, so I’m waiting in line at the Shell station for the drive through wash.

This has been another exciting chapter in Balls’ Day of Random Errands!

Will I go back for the phone upgrade? STAY TUNED!

2
LemonJello

I’m on the edge of my seat.
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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I bet I know which Shell you’re at, too. One time I refilled my tires there and drove off with all the valve caps on my hood. Got to see them slide right over the edge and out into the middle of the intersection.

2
Don T

To pass the time, I joined the insurrection ??✊?!!! #RickyRenuncia #RickyGameOver
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yeah right

Fight the power my brother!

2
LemonJello

I thought it was “Restore the Power!” ???

5
SonOfSpam

We already gave those greedy fuckers paper towels…

0
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Make Puerto Rico Mejor!

0
scotchnaut

British Open Commentary: the dude in 2nd place?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TGZznJXY1Xc

1
scotchnaut

Here’s another hint

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OyONfX5bpyQ

1
rockingdog

found a funny:
People who are offended when I breastfeed in public need to STFU. What I’m doing is natural and strengthens the bond between me and my dog.

4
theeWeeBabySeamus

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Ten bucks says she plugs in the phone charger before taking out the boobie.

1
herodotus450

Referring to a cable as a “charger” really ticks me off sometimes.

0
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

IT’S SACRILEGIOUS, OOOOOOOHHHHHH YEEAAAAHHHHHHH!

0
Fronkenshteen

But of course. Once the baby latches, NO FIDGETIN’!

0
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Beautiful try by South Africa’s answer to Tiny Darren.

1
King Hippo

I bet like $20 on Cherno More at over 10 to 1. They just increased their 1st half lead to 2-nil WOO!!!!

0
Fronkenshteen

Is that Sonny Bono’s team, god rest his soul?

1
scotchnaut

Second Half- get your hands out of your pants and get watching! [listens to receiver in ear] Ah…those of you that want to put your hands into your pants and start watching-we’re good with that as well.

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yeah right

We have a special guest chef in the kitchen today!

No worries, I’m still on the Sunday Gravy beat.
When does football start again?

Jesus it’s a long off season.

1
scotchnaut

Huh, I was told that Anthony Bourdain wasn’t doing any public appearances anymore.

3
King Hippo

the menu will be brains. BRAAAAAIIIIIIINNNNNNS!!

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scotchnaut

According to the tasting menu, they’ll be dry-aged for 3 days, blanched in AB-negative blood and served on a bed of deep-fried skin strips.

3
SonOfSpam

Nah, he’s a vegetarian zombie. GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIINNNNNNSSSS!!!

0
King Hippo

Been meaning to share this for awhile, this is as good a cover as I have ever heard.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b6UazdAlqhs

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yeah right

The LBC feels represented.

1
King Hippo

in mah pants ,, amirite??

2
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ugh, my body hurts

1
King Hippo

I feel I say this at least weekly – welcome to old, it ain’t get no better

1
theeWeeBabySeamus

Hippo ain’t wrong. Get used to it. I’m about to lie down because I threw my back out coming up the stairs.

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yeah right

On a nightly basis when waking up to take a piss my right knee feels like it’s going to snap in half mid piss.

That’s a pretty joyous experience.

1
King Hippo

Betting Finnish Lesser Footy is like trying to nail jello to the wall. Fortunately, I ain’t no quitter.

fuck you, YOU have a problem

3
scotchnaut

Well sure, but it’s not that problem.

2
scotchnaut

Just curious, is Salvador Dali’s granddaughter your interior decorator?

1
scotchnaut

“Australian rugby kickers have it the worst because they have to deal with a ball that’s always turning counter-clockwise. It’s called ‘The Cornhole-Anus Effect-I looked it up in the Urban Dictionary.”

-Codey Parkey, not exactly setting the world on fire in his next job as an announcer

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Ooh, what channel?

1
scotchnaut

TSN5 in Canada which could be just about anything in the States.

1
King Hippo

(usually ESPN3 or ESPN+, though sometimes Fox Soccer Plus has random shit like that)

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Yeah, it’s ESPN+. To the streamatorium!

1
scotchnaut

To the streamatorium!

“I’ll take, ‘What phrase do R. Kelly’s girlfriends hate to hear the most’ for $800, Alex.”

7
King Hippo

/especially when they noe they still have to get back to skool for 4th period afterwards ,, smh

1
King Hippo

Do they have a U17 league?? – Marc T., parts unknown

1
scotchnaut

To be fair, the description of this rugby game promised “Hot, interracial, man-on-man action!” and they’re not wrong.

2
scotchnaut

Is this Aussie/South Africa rugby thing live? It is. Check out the size of this Eben Etzebeth dude.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LF6qgNO5rjk

1
scotchnaut

6’8″, 270 btw. Shee-it!

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It’s like watching Clowney high school highlights.

1
herodotus450

“We-had-a-baby-its-name-is-Eben-Etzebeth”

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Last night we got woken up by a mosquito buzzing in our ears. So I turn on the light and get out my trusty tennis racket electrified thing and fifteen minutes later, ZZZZAAPPPP I get him. Turn off the light and try to get back to sleep and then another fucking mosquito starts buzzing in our ears.

2
theeWeeBabySeamus

15 minutes? How high and/or drunk were you?

1
King Hippo

wait, you don’t have white noise (no ofence) on during your sleep? FREAK!!

1
theeWeeBabySeamus

The young lady on that banner image is quite fetching.
I would definitely be willing to buy her a burrito.

(something something I would try to get a taco something something)

1
theeWeeBabySeamus

She can even keep the sombrero on. In fact I might insist.

1
scotchnaut

The movie ‘Prospect’ on the Netflix starts out on a straightforward narrative path but when the protagonist’s plans go awry so does the plot. Very interesting.

0
scotchnaut

Book-wise I’m split between Motherless Brooklyn and Stalin: Court of the Red Tsar. The former features an excellent depiction of a fella with Tourette’s.

1
King Hippo

I read a long-ass Stalin biography a few years ago, tis one of the few books I successfully got any of my kids to read.

0
yeah right

Finishing up Palahniuk “Adjustment Day.”
It’s very meta but I’m digging it.

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