Pre-Madness Frenzy – Monday Open Thread

The NCAAs start later this week, but today is all about NFL free agency.

Enough ados.

The Bengals—the Bengals!—have been wheelin’ and dealin’

• DT B.J. Hill (“3” years)
• OL Ted Karras (“3” years)
• OG Alex Kappa (from Bucs, “4” years)

The quotes are not a bit. Remember: except for QBs, NFL contracts fall in three categories: (1) rookie contract, (2) one-year contract, and (3) two years + “Yeah, we’ll see”.

Dolphins – QB Teddy Bridgewater (1 year)

Patriots – S Devin McCourty (1 year)

Non-Gendered Cow Persons – WR Michael Gallup (“5” years)

Steelers – Truf Bisquet. I’ve yet to understand Trubisky’s prominence, except as bitterness fuel

Bears – DT Larry Ogunjobi (from CIN, “3” years)

Chargers – CB J.C. Jackson (from the Pats, “5” years)

Qards

• TE Zach Ertz (re-signed for “3” years)
• RB James Conner (“3” years)
• QB Colt McCoy (“2” years; developmental QBs are cheeeeeeeep)

Jags – WR Christian Kirk (“4” years)

Lotta Twitter heat for the Kirk signing, for the alleged $84 mil given by Jax. It’s not a bad signing. Kirk had very good games, especially when on my FF bench.

Vikings – QB Kirk Cousins (TWO yea—

If Cousins continues to fail forward, he’ll ascend to Heaven by 2024.

RAMMMITT!

• OL Joe Noteboom (“3”-year extension)
• C Brian Allen (“3”-year extension)

NY Jets – WR Braxton Berrios

(re-signed 2 years)

C-Hox

• S Quandre Diggs (re-signed “3” years)
• TE Will Dissly (re-signed “3” years)

Titans – C Ben Jones Woooo! (2 years)

Bills – G Rodger Saffold?!

MARITAL NEWS

There is a phrase in English that, to me, is captivating: “familiarity breeds contempt”. The premise is that getting to know someone will foster disgust. There’s lots of wisdom there, but I can only imagine the hellish chasm that was the Brady-Bundchen household for these last two months.

Ah, it’s bad form to speculate what goes on inside a family home. Although I read somewhere that most sons outgrow makeout sessions with dad.

And hey: when I said “captivating” I meant it. There is no equivalent in Spanish for “familiarity breeds contempt”. For us Latin folks, putting “family” in any negative connotation is Race Treason.

SPROTS TONITE

Listings by espen, all times Central:

NHL

Arizona @ Ottawa – 6:30

NBA

Clippers @ Cavs – 6:00

Blazers @ Hawks – 6:30

Nuggets @ 76ers – 6:30

Hornets @ Thunder – 7:00

Timberwolves @ Spurs – 7:30

Wizards @ Warriors – 9:00

Bulls @ Kings – 9:00

Bucks @ Jazz – 9:00

Raptors @ lakers – 9:30

FÚTBOL

Paraguay Primera División

Nacional v. Libertad – 6:15

Ecuador Liga Pro

Guayaquil City v. Delfín – 7:00

Bolivia Liga Professional

The Strongest v. Bolívar – 6:00

AND FINALLY,

It’s nice to see that the NCAA Madness spills up to April 4. And now that MLB returns on April 7, there is an opportunity for uninterrupted escapism up to the 2022 World Series. It’s a nice bridge to the NFL season; all I would need is make my mind find baseball absorbing

Sorry; didn’t mean to kink-shame. Happy Pi Day, peeps!